Chapter Twenty
CHAPTER TWENTY
JOEL
I can’t believe she’s here with you.” Matt nodded toward Natalie as she danced with Lea and Emma. He sat down and loosened his bowtie with one hand, using his free hand to point at my date. “She’s something else.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Look at her. She willingly came to a wedding with you of all people, and she fits the group like a glove. It’s like she’s always been here with us. Plus, she’s beautiful. What’s she doing with a goofy guy like you?”
A grin tugged at the corner of my lips. “No kidding. I keep waiting for her to wake up and realize she’s too good for me.”
“Naw. I’m just messing with you. You’re a good guy and worthy of her for sure. You guys complement each other well. In fact, Emma won’t stop talking about it.” He reached for a piece of cake as a server walked by with a tray.
“Really? What does she think?” I couldn’t believe I was allowing myself to be sucked into schoolyard gossip like this, but it relieved me to know my friends were happy about me moving on. Strangely enough, their validation still meant the world to me.
He sat back and poked around at the dessert in front of him before taking a bite. “She likes Natalie. A lot. And she said there is life in your eyes again. I don’t know what you’re thinking, but we’ve got our fingers crossed for you, buddy.”
“I don’t know what I’m thinking. I’m just taking it one day at a time right now,” I admitted.
Matt nodded. “Understandable. You going to go join them?” He pushed back his chair and stood.
“Yeah, in a minute.”
I shifted my chair to better see Lea and Ben in the middle of the dance floor, flanked by Natalie laughing at something Emma said while everybody jumped and danced to “I’ve Got a Feeling” by Black Eyed Peas. She seamlessly twirled around the group, making short conversation with everybody from the wedding party, her smile stretching from ear to ear, and looking like there was nowhere else she would rather be.
When Natalie had stepped into the living room at her bungalow, it was as if everything around her had gone out of focus and all I could see was this beautiful woman in front of me. It wasn’t even what she was wearing or how she had done something new with her hair. Yes, she looked every bit the sexy she had hoped, but it was her confidence. She carried it in spades. I wanted to be around long enough to know exactly what made her soar and what she felt made her fail.
And why did she know how to tie a bow tie so well? She was a woman of many surprises.
We already had missed spending any time together on Wednesday, and I was trying not to feel cheated by our lost alone time now during the wedding festivities. I couldn’t think ahead to next week. It made me physically sick.
However, the last two days also made me realize how much I missed Lottie. Seeing all the guys again brought back so many memories with her. All the reading I’d done on being a widower pointed out I’d always miss her to some degree. But it would ebb and flow as to how much. I mean, we wouldn’ t have chosen this end for us, so it only made sense I’d always grieve her and how I thought she and I would spend the next fifty years.
I could almost feel Lottie conspired with the universe to pull me out of my funk and throw Natalie at me. It would be like Lottie to do that. It would also be like Lottie to tell me it was okay to be falling in love with this new woman.
Love.
Is that really what this was? I know I told Natalie I couldn’t fall for her, but I was pretty sure I had. Being here wasn’t helping control that. She was charming everybody. She was looking at me with something else in her eyes I hadn’t seen before tonight. She looked at me like I was the only person around. That’s a powerful feeling.
It took everything in me to not rush inside and call Dr. Adams. I can’t afford a third session this week, let alone one that is after hours. And Dr. Adams isn’t my relationship coach, or even my friend, he’s my psychologist. Sometimes I forgot this. He didn’t want to hear me unravel over a woman. At least not again.
Next week I should work on making some local friends. Join a rec league or something. The last few days had shown me how much I missed not only having the company of the one person I wanted around more than anybody else, but also socializing in general. Sharing a meal with somebody. Not spending my whole life at work or in my apartment.
Before joining the dance party, my mind fluttered back to something odd that had happened earlier. I couldn’t put my finger on it. When Natalie saw Lea, she tensed up for a second, and I caught it. She waved it off, but I saw something. In true Natalie fashion, she went back to her sassy, collected self. She was definitely unlike anybody I’d ever met. What unnerved her?
The music ended, bringing me out of my reverie. A slow song came on next—a female cover of “Can’t Help Falling in Love,” fitting, and Natalie caught my eye. She gave me another funny little curtsey and beckoned me with her finger. I laughed as she pretended to rope me and pull me toward her.
“Hi, there.” She pulled me in close and swayed to the beat.
“Hi.” I met her pace and gently moved us around toward an empty corner of the dance floor.
“I think your friends like me.”
“I think so too.”
“I’m glad,” she said, her mouth against my ear. “They’re a lot of fun.”
“They’re not bad.” I moved my head so we were face to face.
“But as much as I like them, I hope you know you’re my favorite.”
“Good. You’re by far my favorite.”
Holding her while we danced, looking into her eyes, breathing in her floral scent, I couldn’t have asked for anything better. I didn’t want this night to end.