13. Foster
THIRTEEN
FOSTER
Sunday morning arrives, and I finally feel the past week in my body. A decent sleep last night was helpful, but one night of sleep is not going to make up for several busy days and restless nights in a row.
Forcing myself out of bed, I change into my sweats, slip on my running shoes, grab my headphones, and head out into the dawn of April first for a quick five-kilometer run. Up with the sun in five-degree weather. I really am the king of fools today. When I turn back onto my road, Styx filters through the headphones and I slow my pace to “Renegade.” My sister says I have the playlist of a middle-aged man, but it’s what gets me moving.
My phone vibrates while I’m stretching, and when I see who it is, I stop immediately.
Sunshine
What kind of booze should I bring? I picked up a bottle of red, white, rose, and Prosecco. Or is that not boozy enough?
You don’t have to bring anything. I’ve got us covered.
Foster, I can’t show up without a sacrificial bottle of something. I want to be invited back.
She wants to be invited back.
Before I can answer, a text from Cass pops up.
LilWalsh
I have to bail on a concert I have tickets to with Sophie. I'm going to suggest she asks you to go. DO IT.
What concert?
Does it matter?
Of course not, but I’m not telling her that.
Yes.
Nyx Avalon on Thursday night.
A pop artist with a dumb name on a school night. I could not think of anything worse—but going with Sophie does sweeten the deal.
What are you going to do for me?
Other than give you a free night out with my amazing best friend to go see one of the best live shows out there?
I don’t know any of her music!
You have the internet, use it!
Come on, she can’t go to a concert alone, that’s just sad.
She has loads of friends, one of them would probably go.
You don’t think I reached out to them first? Hate to burst your bubble bro but you were not my first choice.
Fine. But only cuz you asked so nicely.
You’re second best!
How am I still second best?
Sophie will always be the best.
Well, she’s got me there.
Before I get in the shower, I select a “Best of Nyx Avalon” playlist, and my crash course in Nyx’s entire catalog begins while I wash my workout and another busy week from my body.
“I am bringing all the options. Dan is going to love me.” Sophie holds up three slender gift bags.
“You really don’t need to. I’ve got a bottle of rye for him.”
“Dan will love us both then,” she says matter-of-factly and hands me the bags while she locks the door. “Unless,” she says, whirling back around, “three bottles makes me look desperate and that I’m trying to compensate for being your fake date.” She snatches two of the three bags back, opens the door back up, and sets them to the side before repeating the locking-up process. “Prosecco it is.”
“No one is going to know this”—I gesture between us—“is fake.”
“I mean, we did a fantastic job on Friday, but that was a busy event with hundreds of people. There wasn’t as much scrutiny as there will be today,” she says, paling. “These people know you , know you. You aren’t just a person they saw at work.”
I reach out and take her hand as we walk to my car. “Hey, if they find out the truth, it’s not the end of the world. I’ll take their meddling over your discomfort. If at any time you feel like you can’t carry on the charade, just say the word, okay? Regardless, it’s going to be a good time.” The look Sophie gives me is a mix of relief and awe, like she cannot believe I would release her from our deal.
Then her eyebrows pinch together. “What word?” she asks seriously.
“Oh, not a word-word, just say you’re done.”
She comes to a stop on the sidewalk and her hand slips free of mine. “But now I think we should have a word.”
“Snuffleupagus,” I suggest.
She thinks for a moment, then nods. “That’s a good one. People don’t tend to bring it up too often.”
Nyx Avalon blares through the speakers when I start the car, and my hand flies to turn the volume down. “Sorry about that.” I laugh nervously.
Sophie leans forward and scrutinizes the screen before looking over at me, her blue eyes wide. “ You like Nyx Avalon?”
“Um, she’s growing on me.”
“When did she start growing?”
I look at the time. “About three hours ago.”
“I’m going to see her on Thursday with Ca… Wait.” She holds up a finger and turns her attention to her phone. “You?” she asks, turning slowly toward me.
“Apparently.” I shrug. “Cass texted me this morning saying she couldn’t make the concert and begged me to take her place.”
She’s staring at me in disbelief, and I focus on the drive instead of on her expression.
“You don’t have to go with me, ya know. I am sure I can find someone who’d take the ticket. In fact, I know a few people at the board who would probably fight for it.”
“You’d rather go with someone you barely know over me?” I pout.
“I barely know you .” She puts emphasis on the “you” to really stick it.
“Ouch!” I lay my hand on my chest. “And here I thought we were going steady.”
“You know what I mean.” I can actually hear her eyes roll.
“I haven’t changed much since the days you spent half your time in my house.”
“That guy cursed and couldn’t stand kids,” she counters.
“That guy turned into this guy,” I say, pressing my finger into my chest. “A guy who curses creatively and enjoys working with kids. But otherwise, he’s still the same guy.”
“Well, you better not complain or make fun of how into the music I’m going to get.”
“Sunshine, I am looking forward to how into the music you’re going to get.” I flash my flirtiest grin and watch as her cheeks pink.
By the time we pull up in front of Dan’s house, I think I’ve got one verse of a Nyx song down. I’m not going to throw myself on the altar of Nyx Avalon yet, but I’m starting to see the appeal. Watching Sophie bop to the beat out of the corner of my eye may have been the most appealing part.
There’s a sign on the door that tells us to walk in.
“So it begins.” I take Sophie’s hand, open the door, and we are immediately hit with the smell of latex as we walk into a wall of yellow balloons. It’s not only a wall, though—the balloons continue in every direction and I’m immediately disoriented.
“Which way?” Sophie asks from beside me, and when I look down at her, her hair is standing in all directions from the static the balloons are causing. The yellow is reflecting off her hair, and she has never looked more like sunshine than at this moment. “Foster.” She gives my hand a tug, and I blink out of my stupor.
“I have no idea.” I chuckle.
“Marco?” Sophie yells, catching me completely off guard.
Moments later, a disembodied voice comes from somewhere to our left. “Polo!”
Sophie pulls me in the direction the response came from and calls out “Marco?” again. After a few steps, my shin connects with something hard and stationary.
“Figgy pudding!” I curse, reaching down to rub my leg.
“You okay?” Sophie’s other hand wraps around my forearm, her eyes full of concern.
“I’ll live.” I wince, the pain dissipating immediately when I see how the balloons cast a brilliant yellow across her face. Sunshine.
We eventually make it through the cloud of balloons and are greeted by Dan and his wife Maria who each hand us a drink in greeting. “Happy April Fools’!” they say in unison.
“Um, Happy April Fools’,” Sophie says back with some uncertainty.
“You need to move whatever is in there. I smoked my shin off it,” I inform them, pointing behind us.
“You shouldn’t do that, it’ll hurt.” Dan grins at me before sticking his hand out to Sophie. “Welcome, I’m Dan. This is my wife Maria.”
“Hi! I’m Sophie, but you probably already knew that. Thanks for having me,” Sophie says, shaking both of their hands and then looking down into the glass she’s holding.
I ask the question I know she’s wondering. “So what’s this year’s drink?”
“That there is Joker Juice. Take a sip and tell me what you think is in it.”
Sophie is still looking inquisitively into her cup so I take one for the team. Except when I tip the cup only a dribble of liquid comes out. The remainder of the green substance stays firmly inside the glass. “It’s Jello!” Sophie looks up smiling. “With”—she smells inside the glass—“water?” When she looks up she freezes as both Dan and Maria are staring at her. “Did I ruin the prank? I did, didn’t I? Oh my god, I’m a walking party pooper.”
“I’m actually impressed,” Maria proclaims, smiling brightly at Sophie, who starts to relax. “What gave it away? You didn’t even attempt to take a sip.”
“Well, it is a pretty heavy glass.” Sophie shrugs. “It also doesn’t feel like a glass of liquid. It’s a solid prank, though. Sure fooled this one.” She bumps me lightly with her elbow.
“I’m not sure if this makes me gullible or an idiot.” I sigh. Thankfully no one confirms that I’m an idiot. Although no one denies it either.
If Sophie is surprised that Dan and Maria clearly aren’t from the same generation as us, she doesn’t let on. Instead, she falls into easy conversation with them while we wait for others to arrive.
Within ten minutes, more cursing comes from the entry and we all watch as people slowly emerge from the balloons. One of them, noticeably angrier than the rest.
I thought it was Miranda who’d released an angry curse when her shin had connected with whatever immobile object I had run into earlier. “That better be a real drink and not some fucking prank nonsense,” she grumbles in place of a traditional greeting, her hand instantly reaching for the glasses Dan and Maria have ready.
Maria looks quickly over at Dan with a look that screams “I told you so,” but because Maria is the nicest person alive, there’s a “love of my life” tacked on at the end.
“Don’t mind her, she had a late night.” Heather yawns. “Me too, come to think of it.”
“Was it fun at least?”
“Well they lost so it could have been better,” Miranda grumbles, waving off the fake drink. “No, I’d prefer a real one, please. The twins had us up at five, and then Mike’s parents called to say they were sick and couldn’t babysit. Hence”—she waves at the empty space beside her—“no Mike.”
“How fun for Mike. Babysitting them last night and again today.” Dan laughs.
The laugh dies on his lips as he takes in Miranda’s expression. “They are his children. It is not babysitting when they are your offspring. If I was home with them, no one would say a thing. But oh, dad is staying home with the kids, what a sai?—”
“Oh no, fucking no, just no. Dan!” Nick yells from the entry, silencing Miranda immediately. “I’m leaving. I’m going right back to my car and never speaking to you again.”
Miranda’s anger seems to vanish, and she disappears into the balloons. The door opens and slams, and we’re all left standing there in stunned silence.
“I didn’t mean anything by it. I stayed home with our kids.” Dan winces.
“She’s exhausted and hungry. She’ll be back to her usual self the minute she gets some food in her.”
The back door opens, and we all move further into the house. “Real great prank friends, stellar.” Nick looks shaken, and his partner Alex rubs his back, looking concerned.
“He’s got globophobia,” they say like any of us know what that means.
When no one says anything, Sophie whispers, “That’s a fear of balloons.”
“Oh shit!” Dan exclaims. “I had no idea, Nick. Why have you never mentioned it?”
“Well, I’ve never been so aggressively confronted with the fear. I’ve only ever had nightmares of being in that”—he points toward the front of the house—“kind of situation.”
“So this year’s festivities are off to a grand beginning.” Maria sighs. “Dan, perhaps we should get the drinkable drinks flowing?”
“Oh,” Sophie says, startling all of us as she reaches around me to grab the bag I’m still holding. “I brought you this.” She holds up the gift bag, and Maria takes it.
“You did not need to— Oh, bubbly!” she squeals, pulling the bottle from the bag and doing a little shimmy. “You,” she says, pointing at Sophie, “are welcome anytime.”