Chapter 68
JOSIE
My heart is beating at a million miles per hour as I turn away from Victor and walk toward the restroom.
I did not expect to meet Alda Penmayne just then. I did not expect to see that woman with the perfect teeth and skin and powerful allure. I am knocked sideways and I’m still feeling so daunted by our tit-for-tat little interaction.
I’m... unsettled.
My stomach is turning over and over.
How otherworldly she seemed...
How she said she can find out everything about me. That was scary. I don’t doubt for a moment she can’t - the Penmaynes are a scary bunch.
And I really hated how I had to lie to Victor's mom and say I’m dating him.
Are we really dating? Do I even belong in Victor’s world?
Isn’t this all meant to be fake? I signed that agreement. I made a contract with the actor. This was all just a deal, that’s all.
Why am I putting my heart and soul into all of this when it is a deception? Am I an idiot?
And Alda said she can find out everything. What if she finds out about Victor and me? What happens then?
Does Victor have a plan?
Oh, God.
I am an imposter.
In the restroom, I find an empty cubicle and urgently lock myself in. I take a seat and put my head in my hands and allow myself to freak out.
What are you doing, Josie? How are you at some fancy movie theatre in LA with a man who doesn’t really give a shit about you except as a means to win some stupid award?
His mother literally looked at me in disdain. The same look that Ashley Williams gave me on the red carpet.
A poor barista paired with a literal god among men.
I’ve been a massive fool. I have fallen for the oldest trick in the book – a handsome, rich man with a charming smile. His charm has lured me in. I’ve been taken advantage of.
The most famous man in the world...
Ugh.
I am a walking cliché.
He might hold my hand and profess how much he likes me when we’re alone together, but I know all of this will pass as soon as he gets those same hands around the best actor trophy. I am just a tool for him. I will be discarded.
I hope he’s more than that...
I pull out my phone and absentmindedly scroll social media. I need to distract my mind, even for just a moment, from the reality of what a mess I’ve ended up in. I need to calm down somehow.
And I land upon a post from a high school friend back in Crystal River. It’s her announcing the birth of her baby with her loving husband.
Oh.
It’s sweet, but it makes me sadder than anything else. That’s all I want. Victor doesn’t want that. He’s not after a family.
I just want a baby, and nothing in my life is going in that direction.
I’ve fucked up everything.
All I ever freaking dreamed of was a baby, and that dream seems so very far away right now.
I’ve really fucked up...
The restroom door slams open, and I hear footsteps make their way inside. Voices that echo into the tiled chamber.
I instantly recognize the head girl’s voice.
Ashley Williams - the world-famous actress and megastar... she’s burst into the restroom with all the power and grace of an angel.
And she is holding court with a gaggle of other women. All seem to respond positively to every word she utters. It’s a whole troop of yes women at her side.
And I hide in my locked cubicle, too scared to say anything to reveal my presence here.
“Did you see Victor?” Ashley is asking her subordinates.
“Oh, he’s so good-looking,” someone else coos.
“Yes, indeed,” the actress replies in a singsong voice that has clearly enchanted many casting directors. “He’s such a lovely thing to look at, isn’t he? So pretty.”
“Wasn’t he with some girlfriend?” another girl asks. “I thought he was a single bachelor? I didn’t even recognize that girl. She’s certainly not from around here.”
Now Ashley laughs. It’s incredibly loud – the laughter of a woman who has no earthly concerns.
“Yes, he did have a girl with him,” she announces. “Some little fragile birdy he pulled from some suburb.”
“She didn’t look like anything special,” one of the other voices chip in.
“No, she really isn’t,” Ashley says. “I saw her up close. She’s a plain little thing. No one important. I feel sorry for her, though. Victor always breaks a girl’s heart, and this girl is such a little darling that I’m sure he’ll break her heart into a million pieces before too soon...”
And it all comes dawning on me as I sit here in the cubicle and listen to this gaggle of socialites and movie stars. Maybe I needed to hear Ashley’s nasty words to really understand the situation I’ve put myself in.
I’ve opened myself up to pain.
I’ve let my guard down.
Victor is going to break my heart. It’s as sure as anything. It’s encoded in his DNA.
And I feel like every single one of Ashley’s words is true, and I need to do something about them, and about where I’ve ended up...
And I need to do it now. Before it’s too late.