Chapter 4
ARRO
“Thanks for the invite,” I said as I slid onto a stool at Thane and Regan’s kitchen island.
The kids’ laughter floated into the house from the garden where they played football with Eredine.
There was a good distance between the house and the edge of the cliff, but Thane had fenced it off to protect Lewis and Eilidh.
Thank God, or I’d be a constant nervous wreck when they were out there.
They were safe with Ery, though, who watched them like a hawk.
Ever since Regan’s crazy stalker, Austin Vale, had knocked Ery unconscious while she was babysitting, she’d been extra protective of them.
I’d tried to tell her so many times that Austin tying up the kids and hiding them in Thane’s annex was not her fault.
Unfortunately, I had a horrible suspicion she didn’t believe me.
If being around the kids helped her feel better about it all, that was something Thane, and now Regan, would give her.
“No problem. I drank so much at the wedding, I’m still a little fragile, so I thought I’d make us all a big Scottish breakfast for lunch,” Regan said as she moved around the kitchen.
The morning after the wedding, I’d suffered a pretty terrible hangover myself, but I was feeling fine today.
Still, I wouldn’t pass up a free lunch, and Regan was handy in the kitchen.
She’d learned how to cook local cuisines quickly too.
“Are you sure I can’t help?” I wasn’t too shabby in the kitchen either.
“Nah, it’s fine.”
“Where’s Thane?”
“I told him I’m using most of our essentials to make all this, so he drove into the village for groceries.”
“I could’ve done that, saved him the trip.”
She shrugged. “It’s cool. We needed the space this morning, anyway.”
I didn’t like the sound of that. “Uh-oh.”
Regan glanced over her shoulder at me from her spot by the hob and rolled her eyes. “It’s my fault. I got jealous. I’m cranky from this hangover from hell and took it out on him. I apologized, but I think he’s still pissed, and I don’t blame him.”
I wondered what she’d done. “Jealous? That doesn’t sound like you.
Thane told me about the picture gallery.
” I nodded to the wall opposite the kitchen where photographs of our family were artfully displayed in black and white.
Thane had told me that just a few weeks ago, he’d replaced the photo of him and Fran on their wedding day with a more recent photo of the kids and Regan at Dunrobin Castle.
The next time he passed the hall, however, he’d noted the wedding photo was back in its place.
When he asked Regan about it, she said that Fran was the children’s mother, a part of them, a part of their history, and keeping their wedding photo on the wall honored her and didn’t diminish Thane and Regan’s relationship.
I thought it was just about the loveliest thing I’d ever heard.
He told me he’d fallen in love with her all over again at that moment.
So jealousy seemed uncharacteristic of Robyn’s kindhearted sister.
Regan huffed. “Do you remember when Thane went out on a date with some woman who worked in his building?”
“Vaguely.”
“Keelie.” Regan curled her upper lip. “We fought about it at the time because he deliberately went out with her to push me away.”
I hadn’t known the entire story while their romance was unfolding, but Regan had shared plenty of details since.
Now that she mentioned it, I did remember.
My big brother was having a difficult time accepting his attraction to Regan, and when Keelie asked him out, he’d said yes. It hurt Regan a lot. “I remember now.”
“Thane got a text this morning while he was in the shower, and I swear”—she waved her spatula—“I just happened to be passing his phone when it went off, so I saw the text box come up on the screen. I do not look at his texts, and he knows it.”
“It was a text from Keelie?” I guessed.
Regan nodded, frowning. “I’m not a jealous person, but …
I’m so afraid this will go away.” She gestured around her, clearly indicating her life with Thane and the kids.
“And it’s just her. Other women come on to him all the time, and it doesn’t bother me.
Did you see them at the wedding?” She made a comical face.
“But I think it’s just … Keelie represents this moment in our burgeoning relationship where I thought I wouldn’t get to be with the person I wanted most in this world.
And when I’m hungover, I’m as emotional as when I have my period, you know?
I think because I’m not a jealous person, it took Thane aback this morning. ”
I grimaced. “You flipped your lid?”
“I didn’t flip my lid, as you all say.” She smirked unhappily. “But I certainly had a tone when I asked him, ‘What the hell is Keelie Tanner doing texting you on a Sunday morning?’.”
“Yeesh.”
“Yeah,” she huffed, turning back to the hob.
“He asked, ‘What the hell are you insinuating?’ and the fact that he wouldn’t just give me a straight answer made me even more jealous and irritated, and before you know it, we were arguing.
And he was mad.” Regan moved poached eggs onto the plates she had set out.
“After what Fran did to him, even hinting that Thane might do something shady behind my back is a trigger for him.”
I sighed with sympathy. “Sounds like you two had quite the morning.”
“It wasn’t great.” Regan’s expression was strained. “But I apologized and didn’t even ask him to explain the text as proof of my trust.”
“But it’s bugging the shit out of you, isn’t it?” I tried to hide my grin.
She cut me a dark look. “Seriously, what the fuck is she doing texting him?”
I threw my head back in laughter.
“Hey, you can laugh”—she pointed her spatula at me—“but wait until you love a guy this much and see how crazy it makes you.”
My amusement abruptly dried up.
Regan frowned. “I’m sorry, Arro. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“I’m not upset,” I lied. “I just don’t think that kind of love is in the cards for me.”
There was a moment of silence and then, “Or maybe you already do love someone like that, and something is standing in your way?”
I couldn’t look at her. Instead, I looked outside.
Thane’s living space was open plan with floor-to-ceiling bifold doors opening onto a deck that led down to the garden.
I caught flashes of the kids and Ery as they chased a football.
“They seem in good spirits. I take it they don’t know you and Thane are fighting? ”
“We’re not fighting now—I think—and no. We kept our angry voices down. I noticed you left the reception with a cute guy on Friday.”
At her change of subject, I asked, “So?”
“Well …” She grinned, revealing her adorable dimples. “Who is he? What happened?”
“Gray.” I shrugged, not really wanting to discuss the fact that I’d led a guy on, let him take me to his room, and then freaked out as soon as he tried to undress me.
Gray had been kind about it, even though he was pretty drunk, and we’d fallen asleep on his bed without doing anything.
I’d snuck out before everyone else woke up, and Wakefield, whom I was quite certain never slept, had a driver take me home. “Nothing happened.”
“Oh. Did you want something to happen?”
“Nope.”
Regan exhaled in exasperation. “Arro, what is going on with you? It’s like pulling teeth to get anything out of you these days. You’ve been off for weeks.”
Scowling, I gestured to the half-ready plates. “Did I come here for lunch or to be interrogated?”
“See? That”—she pointed at me indignantly—“that tone, that whole attitude, this bitchiness, is just not you.”
Stunned by her honesty, I slumped.
Because she was right.
This evasive snarkiness was not me.
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry—just tell me what’s going on.”
I wanted to. I wanted to tell someone so much, and maybe that was the problem. Maybe this anger and pain and resentment simmering inside all the time would never go away if I kept it to myself forever.
But even after everything … I couldn’t turn this family against Mac.
“I’m just being selfish.” I couldn’t meet Regan’s gaze.
“Watching Lachlan and Thane meet the loves of their lives makes me wish I could too. It seems impossible living in a tiny place like this.” Lately, as much as it physically hurt to think about separating from my family, I wondered if it might not be worth considering a job in the Lowlands, closer to Glasgow and Edinburgh.
I’d have a better chance of meeting someone there.
“Why don’t you try online dating? Even if you had to travel a little farther to meet someone, it would be worth it, right?”
“I’ve tried online dating,” I murmured.
“Try again. I mean, when was the last time you were in a relationship? When was the last time you had sex?”
I groaned, remembering. “Almost a year ago.”
“That’s not too bad.”
“Says the woman getting it on the regular.” I winced, thinking about who was giving it to her on the regular. At her sly look, I warned, “Don’t say a word.”
Regan snorted. “Would I do that to you?”
“Yes, you would.”
She chuckled and bent to pull the bacon, sausages, black pudding, and haggis out from under the grill. Rotating them as she spoke, Regan continued, “How did you meet the last man you dated?”
The thought of Guy made my stomach churn. “He worked for Lachlan.”
Realization dawned on her face. “The chef guy?”
“His name was Guy.” I noted the flash of anger in her eyes and sighed. “Thane told you.”
“Is that okay?”
“I guess he tells you everything now, right?”
“I would never tell anyone else,” she promised.
“Good. Because some people don’t know, and I don’t want them to.”
“Mac.”