Chapter 30
brODAN
I’d always considered myself attuned to Monroe.
As an actor, I liked to think I was adept at reading people, sensing their moods.
That I was empathetic. But with Roe, it was more.
When we were children and I first became aware of how crappy her home life was, I’d watched Roe like a hawk.
Ready to swoop down and rescue her the moment she needed it.
Monroe rarely needed rescuing, but often she needed the comfort of knowing someone cared about her.
Therefore, I watched for those moments when she needed me to be that person.
It was a habit that evolved until I was always aware of her changing moods.
Apparently, I still was.
And I was worried.
The days after Christmas were fucking magical.
There was no other word for it. We’d canceled Boxing Day plans with my family because I’d turned into a horny eighteen-year-old and couldn’t get enough of Roe.
For two magnificent, unforgettable days, we’d learned every curve and hollow of each other’s bodies.
Our mouths had covered every inch. Just thinking about it made me hard.
Unfortunately, we had to return to the land of the living.
I had to grab some clothes from the estate.
And we needed food. Yet I was determined we walk into the village as a couple.
I didn’t want to hide it, even if it meant gossip among the villagers.
The one thing Ardnoch could be counted upon for, however, was appreciating the positive consequences of the economic boom brought by my brother’s exclusive club.
In return, they respected the privacy of the celebrities who stayed there.
I had faith I would be afforded the same privacy, and that they’d keep any gossip among themselves.
We ventured out, and since I couldn’t seem to go five minutes without touching or kissing Roe, it was probably well known among the villagers that we were a couple by the time we got home from buying coffee and groceries.
We’d also visited my family members individually, and I knew they were happy for us. Arro had texted after our visit:
Well, it’s about bloody time!
This was followed by a series of dancing-women emojis. I guessed that was a good thing.
Some of my family were gearing up for Lachlan’s Hogmanay party on the estate.
Every year he rang in the new year with his members, and despite Vivien’s birth, Robyn had insisted he not miss it.
It was a tradition. Eredine disliked Hogmanay, so she and Arran had opted to babysit Eilidh and Lewis, and Arro and Mac were joining them along with Skye and Vivien.
That meant Robyn, Lachlan, Regan, and Thane would attend the party.
I’d told Roe I wasn’t going. I’d rather ring in the new year with her, hoping it would be a good omen for the future. But mostly, I was worried that if I took her into that world, the world of glitz and glamour and fame, it might scare her off. She was already cagey about my celebrity.
As we sat on the couch in her cottage, however, just a few days out from the party, I watched Roe warily over the top of the science fiction book I read.
I thought by now my fear would have set in. About losing her. There was an occasional flicker, but the euphoria of actually being with her pushed it out.
Now there was fear.
Fear of her withdrawing.
Changing her mind.
I’d leaned in to kiss her in the kitchen an hour ago and she turned, so I caught just the corner of her mouth. She’d given me a small smile that didn’t reach her eyes.
Now, she was sitting on the other sofa when we hadn’t detached ourselves from each other in days.
She was glued to the show playing quietly on the television. We’d watched a movie two nights ago, and she thought it hilarious as we flicked through a streaming app to click on all the movies I’d starred in. “Jesus, Brodan, people are bound to be sick of seeing that gorgeous face everywhere.”
After I’d tickled the life out of her to get the remote back and her giggles had died down, she’d given me an admonishing look and said, “In all seriousness, no wonder you collapsed. You were working yourself to the bone.”
It was true. I’d become obsessed with chasing a distraction. Because of it, I’d made some films I wasn’t proud of. It was a life lesson, to be sure.
I didn’t want Roe to be my next obsession. A passionate burst of flame that burned out too quickly.
I was going to slow down and not ignore moments like these. “There’s something wrong,” I finally said after stewing for hours.
Monroe’s gaze jerked to mine. “Oh? What happened?”
Sighing, I dropped my book and leaned toward her, elbows on my knees. “With you. There’s something wrong with you.”
She turned fully to look at me. “There’s nothing wrong with me.”
“Ever since we got back from Arro’s, you’ve been strange. Distant.”
“No, I haven’t.” She frowned and turned back to the TV. “I’m right here.”
Frustration bubbled within me because I’d heard friends complain about their partners asking them the same question. I’d thanked fuck I didn’t have to put up with that level of interrogation. Look at me now.
“Roe. Don’t make me sound like a whiny girlfriend.”
She cut me a glare. “Don’t say sexist shit.”
“How is that sexist?”
“Uh, because men ask what you’re asking just as much as women do. But we’re the insecure ones? Pfft.”
“I’m right to ask? There is something on your mind?”
“It’s not important.” She gave me a tight smile. “Are you bored? Do you need a different book? Or do you want to watch something else?”
Irritated, I got off the couch and then lowered to my knees in front of her, pushing her legs wide before yanking her to me.
“Brodan,” she spluttered, her hands coming to rest on my shoulders as she gaped. “What are you doing?”
“I wanted your full attention.”
Her hands slid down my arms and around my back, and heat flashed through me.
Stay focused.
“Well, you certainly have it,” she murmured, eyes narrowed with heat.
Fuck.
“I’m serious, Sunset.” I squeezed her small waist. “What did I miss?”
Roe sighed. “Brodan, it’s nothing. I’m just … being silly.”
“Tell me.”
She nibbled on her lower lip.
“Monroe?”
Another heavy sigh. “Fine … I’m just … Are you ashamed of me?”
“What the fuck?” It slipped out angrily.
She tensed and tried to pull away, but I held on tight.
“No, you don’t get to ask that shit and run away. Explain.”
Her eyes flashed. “Don’t boss me around, Brodan Adair.”
A different kind of heat simmered.
Stay focused.
“Tell me, Monroe.”
She released me, crossing her arms over her chest, expression mulish. “Are you going to be an arsehole about it?”
Taking a deep breath, I shook my head. “No. I’m sorry. Continue.”
Her expression was suspicious, but to my relief, she explained, “I don’t mean in general.
Obviously, you’re happy for everyone here to know that we’re together, but …
you didn’t even consider the invitation to your brother’s Hogmanay party.
Am I … do you … would it be embarrassing for you to attend one of those things with a primary school teacher? ”
Shock held me frozen and speechless for a few seconds.
It never even occurred to me she would assume that.
Fuck. I tugged her closer, and her arms dropped from across her chest to rest on my shoulders again.
“Sunset, no. Of course not.” Deciding that too many lies had derailed us in the past, I answered honestly, “I didn’t want to take you there because I’m worried being surrounded by those people, being in that world, will drive you away from me.
You … you told me you’re not sure you can handle the fame. ”
Understanding softened Monroe’s countenance, and she moved into me, wrapping her legs around my back until her chest pressed to mine. “I’m sorry I made you feel that way. I don’t want you ever to feel insecure about that part of your life. If we want to make this work, I’ll deal with it.”
“Aye?” My doubts dissipated with relief. “You want to go to this shindig, then?”
She gave me a sad smile. “As much as I would love to see what’s happened to the old castle … I don’t have a dress for that kind of thing.”
If it were up to me, she’d have a million dresses, but my Roe had an independent streak a mile wide, and I didn’t want to bruise her pride by telling her I’d take care of the dress. It would have to be done in a way she didn’t feel bad about it. I’d figure it out.
For now, I murmured against her lips, “Well, there’s nothing stopping me from showing you around the castle if you’re curious about it.”
She kissed me softly. “Really? Because I’d like to see it.”
“We can arrange that, but first …” I lifted her in my arms as I stood, and her squeal of fright made me laugh as I marched toward the staircase.
“Again?” she asked breathlessly, her cheeks flushed.
“You made me feel very insecure, my love,” I teased. “I need some reassurance.”
“And thus does your cock?” she asked wryly.
Said appendage hardened. “I love it when you talk fancy and dirty all in one sentence.”
Her laughter filled the stairwell and my fast-beating heart.
Too many emotions ran through my blood, raw and wild.
By the time we got to the bedroom, I threw her on the bed and didn’t even give her time to fully undress before I thrust inside her hot, tight body and poured every thought and every feeling into her with mine.
MONROE
I had some work I needed to set up for class starting back in January, so when Brodan announced he’d promised to visit Lachlan to help him with details for the Hogmanay party, I didn’t question it.
Instead, as much as I loved our wee bubble, I took the opportunity to work on my schedule and create homework sheets the kids could complete online.
Being organized for work just put me in a better mood, and Brodan and I had plans to ring in the new year tonight.
I’d rather do so with nothing else on my mind.