Chapter 15 River
River
Not the best start to the evening, if I’m honest. The second I saw Benson hanging about talking to Cleo, I did a quick about turn and aborted mission.
Bloody hell, all I wanted to do was pick her up for our first date.
We’re already bordering on ridiculous by trying to have a romantic meal in the mess. This really takes the cake.
I slipped away without incident. There’s no doubt Benson would’ve collared me if he’d seen me.
I’m sure he would’ve found some reason to discipline me or generally just give me a hard time, even though I have every right to be walking through the ship.
More so due to my link with Cleo. After all, she could have needed me for something.
Then again, I’m glad I didn’t have to put her in a situation where she would’ve had to lie.
Instead of sitting down to dinner, I’m pacing the mess, hoping Cleo is okay, and that tonight isn’t a complete bust. Maybe I should wait another five minutes and then go back to her cabin.
“River?”
I spin on the spot and come face-to-face with Cleo. She’s dressed in relaxed yoga pants and a sweater that drapes delicately across one shoulder and off the other. Her hair is up in a loose bun, and she’s never looked sexier.
I, on the other hand, am still in uniform, because as much as I want to stick my civvies on, I’ll catch the attention of every sailor on board. Civilian clothes are for shore leave only. I can get away with my sweatpants and tank top in the mess on an evening, but not skintight jeans and a top.
“Cleo, hi, you look…lovely. You look great!”
A small smile lifts the side of her lips. “Thank you. You look—”
“Like I’ve just come off shift, I know. I’m sorry. I really wanted to get dressed up but—”
“River, it’s okay,” she says, taking a step towards me. “I know it would raise too many eyebrows if you dressed up.”
I deflate. “But it’s our first date,” I say with a little whine.
Cleo chuckles at me, and I must admit it’s one of the sweetest sounds I’ve ever heard. “It is, but we’re doing things a little differently than most, so…”
“So, I should stop worrying and start wooing you, right?”
“If that’s what you want to do.”
Of course it is. If I’m going to do this dating malarky, I’ll put as much effort in as I do when taking a woman to bed. I’m going to rock Cleo’s dating world!
“It is what I want to do. Starting with a gourmet meal prepared by the King’s finest naval chef extraordinaire, Tim ‘Tadpole’ Mercer.”
“Wow, that’s quite the name.”
“And one I will happily explain when we’re not about to eat. It’s kind of gross.” I wrinkle my nose and force down the smile as Cleo rolls her eyes at me. “Would you like a seat?”
Stepping to her side, I lay my hand a hair’s breadth away from her lower back.
I’m going for gentlewoman meets Jane Bond.
A mix of good manners and charm, with a smidge of gentle flirtation.
Nothing too strong, because I want Cleo to know I took what she said about sex seriously.
This isn’t about getting in her knickers, it’s about allowing myself to really connect with her. At least try, anyway.
Walking her the two steps to the table I had set with the least shitty cutlery I could find, I pull her chair out. Cleo sits gracefully and wastes no time laying the napkin I somehow folded into a—somewhat looking—swan across her lap.
Racing around the other side of the table, I sit and take my own napkin.
The action gives me a few precious seconds to calm my breathing.
My eyes skirt around the mess, checking one last time for anything out of place.
I called in every favour I was ever owed to set up this date.
I made Cheddar a deal she couldn’t refuse.
I convinced the Weapon Engineers to deep clean the mess by promising to cover their next PT session.
I begged Tadpole to risk a bollocking by sneaking food from the galley.
This date is held together by favours, bribes, and sheer desperation.
Leaning over, I pass Cleo a bottle of beer. Ideally, I would have champagne on ice, but lager is all I had available so…
“Cheers!” I beam. Cleo clinks her bottle against mine and takes a swig.
The mess door opens and Cheddar steps through, holding a tray. She’s our server for this evening due to the lucrative deal she struck with me, which will have me supplying her with Wotsits for the next twenty years.
“Evening,” she says, a little out of breath. “Do you know how hard it is to sneak a tray of food from the galley to the mess? Really hard! God, I had to hide like three times.”
I glare at her because she’s completely ruining the mood.
I spent hours planning this. I coordinated with half the ship.
I was finally getting Cleo to relax, finally building some intimacy, and Cheddar just waltzed in like she’s on a bloody cooking show.
I love her, but right now, I could throttle her.
Shit! I forgot to put some music on.
My stare must do the trick because Cheddar shuts her trap and puts the tray on the table.
“I’ll be back later with dessert. Bon Apetit.”
We watch her leave, and silence descends for a few awkward seconds.
“Did Cheddar just say Bon A-pet-tit?” Cleo snorts.
I scratch my temple nervously, because yes, my best friend did just butcher the French language to make a stupid joke…in the middle of my first date with the admiral’s daughter.
“What can I say…she’s…Cheddar. No one like her in the world.”
Cleo is still chuckling as I pull off the plate covers and reveal our meal for the evening.
“Voila,” I declare in a terrible accent. “Only the finest for you, Cleo. Toad-in-the-hole with creamy mash and gravy.”
Okay, so when I said Tadpole was the finest chef in the King’s Navy, I may have exaggerated just a little.
He is a great chef though, and would’ve absolutely proved that if he had the ingredients in the galley to make us something fancy.
However, as he was, and is, risking a bollocking for helping me sneak food out of the dining room, I can’t complain that he served us the same dinner as the other sailors.
Unfortunately, the favour owed to me by one of the officers’ chefs couldn’t be called in, so I went begging in the crew’s kitchen.
“Wow, this is a generous portion.”
My heart freezes as I watch her assess the plate.
She’s smiling, but I don’t know her well enough to discern her taste in food.
What if she’s a vegetarian? What if she hates gravy?
What if she thinks toad-in-the-hole is too working-class, too common, too…
not fancy enough? I should’ve asked. I should’ve planned better. I should’ve—
But then again, I wanted tonight to be a surprise for her.
Christ, this dating stuff is hard. The only thing I ever had to worry about as pre-dating River was if I could get out of the woman’s bed without waking her up, and if I had enough cash left for a breakfast bap before getting back to the ship.
“It’s not exactly—”
“It’s perfect, River. I love toad-in-the-hole. I can’t remember the last time I had it.”
“Oh, um good. That’s good then!”
Before picking up her cutlery, Cleo reaches over and lays her hand on mine, which is gripping my fork like there’s no tomorrow. “River, please relax. This is supposed to be fun, not anxiety-inducing.”
Oh, if she only knew. I’ve had anxiety since the second I woke up this morning. Trying to coordinate a mess full of sailors while working at the other end of the ship, while avoiding Benson and Grey, has been nothing short of a terrifying miracle, considering I seem to have pulled it off.
“Sorry. I guess I’m a little nervous.”
“We’re just eating together. No pressure.”
“Ha!” I bark involuntarily. Cleo’s eyebrows rise slowly. “Sorry, sorry. It’s just, for me, there is a ton of pressure.”
“Why?”
I stare at her silently for a second. How can she ask that? “Because you’re the first woman I’ve ever taken on a date. It feels pretty important I get this right, Cleo.”
She cocks her head to the side, causing her sweater to slide further down her shoulder with the movement. I’m straining so hard not to look at her bra strap and the soft skin of her shoulder that my eyes are watering.
“River, this isn’t just about you. The success of tonight isn’t on your shoulders alone.
It’s not about the food, or even the setting for me.
It’s about the company. First dates are fun, and, yes, admittedly butterfly-inducing, but that’s all a part of it.
I just want us to talk. It doesn’t have to be about anything deep. Not yet, anyway.”
I nod my head, because I can do that. “Okay, okay. Let’s get to know each other then. We’ve got about an hour, because unfortunately, I couldn’t bribe my friends for any longer.”
Cleo laughs. “That’s a great place to start. Tell me about bribing your friends. Actually, tell me how you met them.”
My body relaxes as she gives me that smile which I’m becoming a little obsessed with. Cleo is easy to talk to and somehow knows just what to say to get me to calm down.
Taking a sip of beer, I smile fondly at the memories running through my head.
“Cheddar and I met in basic training. Unfortunately, it’s where we met Grey too, but no need to bring her into it.
Anyway, me and Cheds just sort of clicked.
HMS Raleigh is tough, and it takes a village to get through it.
Cheddar and a few other recruits became that village early on.
We were up for the same specialism too, so really, we’ve been together from the moment I joined up.
Kit was already on board when we joined the Queen Elizabeth.
It was like kismet or something when we got bunked together.
Three queer women who got along like a house on fire. ”
“Wow, that’s amazing.”
I nod my head and laugh. “Boot came along and completed the set. What about you? Do you have a best friend or friends?”
Cleo grins. “I certainly do. She reminds me a little bit of…actually she’s a mix between you all, I think.”
Grinning, I hike up an eyebrow. “So she’s bonkers?”
“Oh, completely! But she’s my person. Honor is just so kind, and loving, but utterly nuts. I think she knows me better than anyone.”
I clear my throat. “Is…is she gay?”
“No, she’s an utter man-eater.” Cleo cackles. “I’ve never met someone who has such a thirst for sex.”
My cheeks warm because we both know she’s just realised what she’s said. There is at least one more person she knows who enjoys a lot of sex, and she’s on a freaking date with them.
“Um, I…”
I laugh because this is all kinds of crazy. “Don’t tell me you’re feeling awkward, Cleo Carter? Let’s acknowledge the horny elephant in the room, shall we? Yes, I’m probably as much of a woman-eater as your friend Honor is about men. There’s no denying it, is there?”
Her lip swipes across her bottom lip and I’m picking up an undercurrent of sexual tension, which is encouraging. However, I already know we have great chemistry between the sheets. Even if Cleo wasn’t as blown away as me.
“You’re right.” She grins. “You possibly are a match for Honor.”
“However,” pointing my index finger to the sky as a symbol of my sincerity, “those days are behind me.”
“River, you can’t say that.”
“Why?” I say with a little force. “We’re here on this ‘tin can’ as you put it. Dating, I might add, and getting to know each other. I won’t be with anyone else.”
“Sure,” she says slowly, which, to be honest, sounds a little condescending. “But we will dock eventually.”
“Well, yeah…and?”
She’s looking at me with confusion, as if I’m missing something…and then it clicks. “Ah,” I begin with a mirthless laugh. “You’ve put an end date on this before it’s even got started.”
“No I hav—”
“Yes, Cleo, you have. You’re expecting us to arrive back in Portsmouth to watch me hop off the ship and straight into the bed of some random woman, right?”