Chapter 7
SEVEN
ZANDAOR EXLITH-ORVANIS-ORKITH
My Lithoame's bedroom was covered in depictions of small, furry mammals that had similar features to Norratar. There were pictures of them on the walls, several stuffed caricatures of them, and her bedspread had a single, large image of one.
"In case it isn't clear, I like cats," she said as I looked around the room. "They are small domesticated mammals that are pets on Earth."
"Is there one in here?" I asked, looking for signs of such a creature.
"No," she said. "My ex-boyfriend kidnapped Mr. Snookums when we broke up. I couldn't bring myself to get a new kitten, not if there was any chance I would get Mr. Snookums back. He hates other cats, and I couldn't do that to him."
"You are committed to your relationships," I said, pointing out the obvious conclusion as I continued to stand there in the middle of the room and wait.
I didn't know what I was waiting for, but whatever it was, it was important to my mate.
The closer we got to her bedroom, the more she pulled away from me, becoming tense.
I knew my scent was affecting her, especially as it filled the space, but she didn't relax into it.
As desperately as I wanted to tear that top cover off the bed and throw her down onto the soft surface and become a beast with two backs, as she so eloquently put it, there was something to wait for.
Mating wasn't just the physical act of joining; it was the repeated connection of minds, seeking to understand and witness one another.
I was waiting for her to tell me what she needed.
"I do commit," she said, the tension spilling out through her voice, letting me know that the space I had created with my inaction had pulled free her thoughts.
"I commit so hard I lose sight of reality.
I will believe in a fantasy if you give me enough room to doubt my own instincts.
I just need you to understand that because I don't want this if anything you've said to me has been a lie.
If you didn't mean something, if you said any of it because you thought it was what I wanted to hear, I'm begging you, please.
Please don't do this to me. Please don't tell me what I need to hear to do this to myself.
I know it is crazy, I just met you, but I want you, I want this, so badly that it terrifies me.
Please don't let me commit to you if you're just going to leave me. "
There was a tremble in her voice, and I could see liquid pooling in the corners of her eyes as she stared at me with a look that wavered between hope and terror.
I took her hands in mine, stroking my thumbs across the backs of her hands to anchor her to her body.
Sometimes the individual could get lost in the many aspects of Oame, losing their connection to their body in favor of the journeys of the mind.
In her case, her disconnection from her Oame, to her oneness with Earth, had been caused by the cruel words and actions of another.
She had repeated those words to me before, and now she was begging me not to hurt her the way she had been hurt before.
It wasn't enough to say that I wouldn't hurt her.
I needed her to feel it in my words, to experience it in my actions.
"Those who cannot feel the Oame in themselves are unable to see the Oame in others," I said. "They are unable to speak truth because they cannot see truth. I do not have that failure. I know I am Oame, and I know you. I see you."
"But I'm-" she started, about to launch into the words of another, words that didn't carry the truth.
"You are the mate I choose with my heart as well as my scent," I said.
"When I first saw you, I was utterly captivated by the strange beauty of your body.
As we spoke, I felt the resonance of your Oame, the immensity of your latent potential, and the humility with which you approach your niche-finding.
I hear that this is a short courtship for your species, but it isn't for mine.
Scent matching can only happen when oneness with Oame is clear.
If you weren't the woman I see before me, if you were the one who matched the words others have painted you with, then you would have been repulsed by my scent, not drawn into it.
Be my mate, join me in Lithoame, and we will niche-find together. "
"Are you sure?" she whispered.
I reframed my words in her species' phrasing.
"I commit to you. I will not leave you," I told her. "I am certain."
"Certain," she repeated, her entire body leaning into me, pressing our joined hands in between us as she tilted her head up to gaze at me in wonder.
"Yes, certain," I said.
"Be one with me," she whispered.
"We are one," I said, and then I brought my lips to hers.
The meeting of our bodies was that of two stars, swirling together in the dark void.
Her lips were the flames that radiated into my core, invigorating me with the taste of her energy, a life that had waited far too long for the spark of freedom, for the support to lift her up and allow her to dance with the cosmos.
She was clearly not willing to wait any longer.
Her fingers were on the edge of where I had peeled down my scent suit, trying to tug it down over my hips. Off, our clothes needed to be off. I lifted the bottom of her shirt, capturing her arms with it, and then she lifted them up and broke free from her lips as I tugged it up over her head.
Her hands returned to my hips, and I let out a growl, put my hands on her hips, and picked her up.
She gasped as I set her down on the bed, my body hovering over her for a brief moment before I reached for the waistband of her leggings.
I began to pull them down, intending to savor the moment inch by inch as her scent blossomed in the air, driving me to madness, but then she was squirming, her leggings and undergarments halfway down her thighs.
"Not on Mr. Snookums," she said, reaching out to the side to grab the bedspread with one hand, and then in a wild roll, she took herself all the way to the other side, flipping the blanket up over her as her upper body tumbled all the way off the side and onto the floor, tangled in the blanket.
She struggled out from under the blanket, throwing it off of herself as she pushed herself up with her arms. I made things simpler by grabbing her ankles and hauling her back across the bed, as she let out a soft squeal. Her bare rear jutted up in the air, and that was it, I lost it.
I grabbed her thighs and pressed my face into her.
I rubbed my face in her wet nether hair, spreading her slick scent all over my skin before licking her, tasting her, exploring her folds.
She shuddered in my grip, her body trying to pull away, and I let go with my hands, even as I followed with my face, licking her as she fell forward onto her belly.
I waited, reveling in the taste of her aroma on my lips, and then she let out a small, needy sound, and arched her back, tilting her wet slit up toward me.
I bit her on one round cheek, soft enough not to break skin but hard enough to get a gasp of pleasure as I kicked off the lower half of my own coverings.
Her legs were held together by the leggings and undergarment that had worked their way down to her knees, and I ignored them as I grazed my teeth up her back, feeling her shudder as I mounted her, rubbing my thick length against her wet slit, mingling our scents together.
But this wasn't right.
I couldn't see her eyes.
Lithoame required connection.
I shifted her underneath me, asking her with my touch to turn her upper body so that she was twisted, tangled under me, her legs still bound together as I slid one hand down her belly to caress the soft folds of her lower lips with my fingers and adjust my hard length so that it pressed against her opening, prodding her as I felt her open, wet mouth teasing my tip.
I waited until her eyes met mine.
I sank into her, slowly, inch by inch, holding her gaze, holding this moment of knowing we were in this together.
I felt her wrap around me, take me in. Her eyes threatened to close as I sank deeper, and I stopped waiting until she was focused back on me, and then I moved, until the tip of me found resistance in her and I was seated, to the hilt, inside the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
"I didn't know it could feel like this," she whispered.
I moved.
I thrust, slow and deliberate, focusing on the sensation of her bare flesh sliding around mine, listening to the soft sounds of the air being forced out of the spaces between us as our bodies pressed into one another.
As our bodies connected, I reached out to her Oame, her Earth, the Oneness that existed in all beings.
I reached out with the certainty that it would happen, that we would become Lithoame, even though she was an alien, even though she came from a different planet and I didn't have any logical idea of how it could work.
I didn't need logic. Her culture had hints of the same thoughts, the same idea, expressed when she said that becoming one was an expression of mating.
All I needed was to hold her in my arms, hold her in my gaze, bring her into full alignment with the present moment, anchoring all her thoughts into the same state as mine at the same time, and it would happen.
I could see her pleasure building in her eyes, how her pupils dilated as she focused on the connection of our bodies. Her eyes started to close, her face turned away, and I reached out and tilted her chin back to me.
"Look at me," I told her. "Hold my gaze and join me in Lithoame."
I circled my fingers around the sensitive nub between her lower folds, and shifted my hips, my adjustment rewarded by a sudden gasp of pleasure. I focused in on that spot, making sure each of my thrusts pressed against it.