Lonely Life #5
Guys always flirted with me, but Luke put the last guy I kissed in the hospital right after I got here. I didn’t know how he knew, but he slipped a note under my apartment door. I didn’t want to be responsible for that again.
We had broken up and I really didn’t know why he was so possessive. Maybe because his dad was all in on the arranged married and my ex’s possessive ass thought I belonged to him. Luke needed to get over it, because deep down the man should be happy I was saying no.
It was pretty obvious my ex hated me. Luke locked me away and then didn’t even have the decency to be around when I got out. Not that I wanted him there, but still the point remained he wasn’t. Then he had the audacity to be upset I was moving on.
I closed my locker and one of those perfect, model like girls was standing there. Her name was Roxie. She casually said, “Hey Tess, what are you doing for Thanksgiving?” I answered, “Nothing. I’m working on Black Friday.”
I had gotten a job in a retail store here when we moved. I was working the entire Black Friday shift. The girl whose shift I’d volunteered to cover was grateful. She had a family and it was an easy shift for me to take because I didn’t.
Roxie bobbed her head then said, “Well, my mom always makes too much food. You could stop by if you want. We could really talk without other ears around.” I asked, “Why would you want to talk to me?” Roxie laughed, “Hey, we all have to stick together. You know? We aren’t like other people.
I mean you and I aren’t the same, but you know what I mean. ”
I told her honestly, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She studied me, then her jaw dropped. Roxie gasped, “Wait, you’re serious. You have no idea what the difference between us and them is.” She pointed at some other students in the hallway.
I responded, “Currently the difference is where we are standing as opposed to them. In general, I mean you could be a model. Your boyfriend and his friends clearly value lifting weights and keeping up their physique. Oh, wait, I know what you mean!”
Roxie looked relieved. I continued, “You mean being on a super strict diet. I didn’t realize that was a high school clique.
I used to do my best to make enough money to follow my mom’s program.
I cheat a lot though because that food is expensive.
Some weeks I live off pizza rolls and ramen. They are cheap.”
Roxie looked horrified insisting, “Seriously Tess, stop by my house on Thanksgiving. We need to talk.” I shrugged, “I’m sure I can manage that. At least for a little bit.” I was literally not doing anything and a small, but loud, part of me wanted to hang out with Roxie for some reason.
Roxie sighed in relief, “Great. Give me your number.” I admitted, “I don’t have a phone.” Roxie frowned then wrote something down in her notebook then gave it to me. Roxie explained, “This is my email address. Email me. Ok?” I nodded.
My classmate walked away muttering, “They are isolating her. She needs to know what she is. I was hoping she knew because none of us have a clue.” What I am? I knew what I was. A lonely girl whose own mom couldn’t stand to be around her for more than a week at a time.
A girl who was susceptible to abuse because I wanted the connection I used to have with Lux. The girl I was now knew that no one could replace Lux. Melanie and her friends had made me feel seen again though. I wasn’t going to fall for another abusive scheme. I could fight back now.
I snorted and walked to my next class. Several of Roxie’s friends were observing me with new looks. It was like they somehow spoke to Roxie about our conversation. Which wasn’t possible because Roxie didn’t come in here.
None of them were looking at their phones so she didn’t text them. Were they intuitive? I shrugged it off and completed my test. I knew I would get an A. Once the bell rang, I went to lunch. I was sitting at a random table when someone plopped down beside me.
I knew who it was the second he whispered in my ear while running his finger up my arm, “You call to me. God, I think you’re my addiction. I could have you screaming my name underneath me so fast.” I jerked away from him.
I warned, “Stay away from me, Todd.” The wannabe Luke jumped up, acting offended, “Don’t be a tease.” Roxie was beside me in a flash with her boyfriend. God, they should run track. I swore they were just across the room two seconds ago.
Roxie practically growled, “Back off spell boy, Tess doesn’t like you.” Spell boy? Were people into Wicca around here? Darn. Maybe I should’ve asked Todd some questions about hexes and shit to keep Luke away.
Todd shot back, “That’s Warlock man to you, dog.” I gaped at him while Roxie’s boyfriend snarled. I jumped in, “Todd, that is not how you talk to women. Roxie isn’t a dog, and she was just defending me.” Todd stared into my eyes.
Suddenly, he was flush up against me. Todd moaned, “Oh yeah baby, command me. Tell me what to do.” Before anyone else could react, I grabbed his wrist and twisted it before kneeing Todd in the balls.
He went down in a heap. The lunchroom was silent for a second before it howled with laughter. Literally.
I swear some of Roxie’s friends were howling. Gosh. Maybe mom was right. I read too many paranormal, fantasy books. Roxie chuckled, “Damn, Tess. You’ve got moves. The poor Warlock man didn’t realize your strength.”
I grabbed my bag saying, “I had a friend who taught me self-defense after…” I trailed off. I couldn't tell these people I was kidnapped or beaten up by my ex-boyfriend. Roxie frowned, “After what?” I shrugged, “Doesn’t matter. I learned and I will never be the weak prey people think I am.”
I ran to the exit like it was my lifeline. I reached the door when I heard Todd groan, “What the hell is she to be so strong?” Roxie shot back, “Don’t mess with people you don’t know, Todd.” He winced and cupped his balls.
Todd retorted, “I told you something about her calls to me.” Roxie scoffed, “Whatever. You’re a creep and everyone knows it.” I frowned, because he was hardly the first person to say something about me ‘called to them.’
I noticed that Roxie’s boyfriend, Kaiser, was staring at me. I shook myself and muttered, “How the hell could I hear them? It was like they were right next to me.” I walked out the door. Someone said, “So Fairies are out.” Fairies? What?
Did someone think Todd was gay until he accosted me? He did kind of keep to himself. Weren’t we past this as a society? Todd could like who he liked without being called names. He just needed to stop being a creep about it. I went to the library to calm myself down.
After a while Roxie’s brother, Rex, came and sat down by me.
I wanted to tense, but I didn’t. In fact, it was like his actual presence wrapped around me like a safety net.
What in the hell was wrong with me?! I wasn’t attracted to Rex, but my body was telling me I was safe in his presence.
Maybe because Todd was a creep and Rex wasn’t. Surely, that was it.
I asked, “Can I help you?” Rex laughed, “Someone is snappy today.” I sighed, “Sorry.” Rex offered, “Todd is a jerk.” I nodded. Rex continued, “You seem really lonely, Tess.” I acknowledged, “Probably because I am.”
Rex frowned, “Roxie would love to be your friend.” I told him, “I broke my rule of not making friends in the last place I lived only for my mom blew back into town and ruin it. Now I don’t get to see them until I track them down when I turn eighteen. It hurts every day that I’m not with them.”
I whispered, “Like an ache in my chest that’s crying out for that little group I joined.
” I weakly joked, “Like a pack.” I faltered, “I mean, god. Yes, I’m a weirdo who reads Fantasy.
” Rex shrugged, “As do I. I don’t find it weird to want a pack.
I have my own, and I’m kind of the leader. ” I’d noticed that in my time here.
I corrected, “We both are obviously meaning a friend group, not a pack. I’m happy to meet a fellow fantasy book lover though. Anyways, it hurts less when my mom meets her next boyfriend victim and we leave, if I don’t make friends. I learned that when I was five, but at the last place I forgot.”
I snorted, “Rather, my friend wouldn’t stop showing up and including me. They became the group I needed to see and now I can’t even contact them. I thought I could keep that going here, but my ex proved that wrong. Plus, you don’t want me to be your sister’s friend.”
Rex pointed out, “That’s a bold statement from someone who doesn’t know me.
” I snorted, “My own mom doesn’t even like me.
I don’t see her much, and when I do it’s because she’s been dumped or did the dumping and we are moving.
My older brother vanished from my life without a goodbye, and he was my only constant for five years. ”
“My psycho ex-boyfriend is apparently stalking me and might report to my mother we are talking. You know that kid in the hospital? My ex is responsible, because the poor guys kissed me. Who knows if my evil ex is around now? I didn’t even know he was in the town to notice he realized I had friends in Nashville. Let alone got kissed by someone here.”
Rex interrupted, “Does he feel like you’re his soul mate? Or mention anything about that to you?” I snorted, “No, he feels entitled to me because our parents decided we are getting married. They are all insane. He was physically, and mentally, abusive.” Rex growled angrily.
I continued, “Like the abusive jerk he is, my ex didn’t like my friends or me being kissed.
Or it was the fact that I had friends at all that he hated.
I really don’t know. I even have this blood disorder from my dad, whom I’ve never met, and when I don’t take the medication for it I get really sick and hear voices. ”