Chapter 19
Chapter Nineteen
A s it turned out, Arjun’s engagement wasn’t very official at all. After he called her with the good news, Dhanya the matchmaker had informed Arjun that he was not, in fact, engaged—despite the fact that he and Sophia had agreed to marry one another. “That is not how things work, beta ,” Dhanya had said patiently, as though talking to a small child. “You are not officially engaged until your roka ceremony.”
“Right,” Arjun had replied. He knew that he’d heard the term before—but, for whatever reason, it had suddenly lost all meaning.
Dhanya sensed his hesitance. “It’s the Hindu engagement ceremony,” she explained. “‘ Roka ’ means ‘stop.’ Your families will meet to agree to stop pursuing other people and to officially approve the match. There will be a pandit , who will conduct a traditional Hindu ritual. And, of course, you will exchange gifts. That’s my favorite part. All other arrangements—most importantly, the date for the marriage itself—can be determined after the roka concludes.”
All right, so Arjun wasn’t really engaged. Still, when he told his mother, she had reacted in her characteristically melodramatic fashion: “Finally, Arjun—a daughter-in-law,” she had proclaimed. “I can die at peace, now.” Sarita had flown all the way from Iowa the very next day, and she declared the couple to be a perfect match within minutes of meeting Sophia.
With Sarita back in Des Moines on Sunday evening, Arjun was left to plan for the roka with Sophia. They’d agreed to hold the ceremony at a Hindu temple in San Ramon a few weeks later. Sarita would come, of course, and Sophia’s parents would hop on a flight from Los Angeles. Arjun drew a blank when Sophia asked about his guest list. “Uh…Dan and Erica, of course,” he’d said. He thought next about Nisha—would he invite her? How would she even react to me being engaged? he wondered as Sophia debated between burgundy and lilac color palettes.
He found out at work on Monday. “I have big news,” he said, setting his bag down on their desk.
Nisha raised an eyebrow. “What is it?” she asked, lowering her laptop screen.
He sighed. Time to rip off the band-aid , he thought.
“I’m engaged,” he said. “To Sophia. Well, pre-engaged, but…well, we’re getting married.”
He waited for some sort of response. Perhaps Nisha would be disappointed. Or maybe she’d be angry, hurling staplers and stationery across the desk at him while howling, “HOW COULD YOU?”
Instead, she said only: “Oh. Congratulations.”
“Thanks,” he replied, and a weighty silence hung in the air. For a moment, he wondered if he should say something else—but what?
He suddenly felt very stupid standing there. Nisha was still looking at him.
“Well, I should go,” he said, gesturing to the door with his thumb. In truth, though, he had nowhere to be. He walked down the hallway and paused in the stairwell. It occurred to him that he had almost… wanted Nisha to be jealous.
Why? he wondered. You’re with Sophia now. You’re getting married to Sophia . And that statement was enough to shock his thoughts of Nisha Nandan into awed submission for a little while—before, inevitably, they surfaced once more.
The rest of the week flew by. Arjun and Sophia hammered out the details of the roka ceremony over FaceTime with her parents. Arjun realized that this was the first time he was meeting them; perhaps because they knew that he and Sophia had already agreed to marry, they went much easier on him. While they were both attorneys, they refrained from the cross-examination and warmly welcomed Arjun to the family. “We’re so excited to meet you in person, Arjun,” Sophia’s mother said.
“And we’re so sorry we haven’t come up sooner,” her father added. “There’s this case?—”
“—huge case,” Sophia’s mother cut in.
“Right, huge case. Anyway, we’ve both been terribly busy. But you know how it is, eh?”
Arjun nodded. “Of course,” he said. He exchanged a look with Sophia. “You know, I could always come down to Los Angeles, if you’d like. It’s just a short hop from SF.”
“No need for all that!” Sophia’s mother said, shaking her head vigorously. “We’ll see you in two weeks, won’t we? You know, that’s how it was done in the past: the first time the bride and groom met was at the roka !”
Arjun smiled. “I suppose things are working out the way they’re meant to, then,” he said. He folded his hands in a farewell namaste . He was already imagining Thanksgiving with these new, very nice, very busy in-laws.
Arjun and Sophia had agreed to get dinner with Dan and Erica the following Friday at an upscale Italian restaurant called Scopa. “I hope this is one of many double dates,” Erica had said.
To Arjun’s knowledge, double dates involved only four people—so when he arrived at the restaurant with Sophia, he was very surprised to see Nisha Nandan sitting at the table right beside Erica.
He smiled awkwardly. Things with Nisha had steadily grown more stilted since he told her about his engagement to Sophia. Of course, they were still friendly, but Arjun felt like things weren’t flowing as well as they used to, like a stream that was being slowly choked by pollution. Even being in the office with her was agonizing, and he’d ducked out early every day that week, opting instead to work from the coffee shop across the street.
“Hey, Nisha,” he said. “This is Sophia Verma. Sophia, this is Nisha Nandan.”
Sophia extended a hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you,” she said. “And how do you two know each other?”
“We work together,” Arjun said hastily.
“Arjun has told me all about you,” Nisha said with a winning smile. “I’m looking forward to getting to know you better.”
Arjun and Sophia took their seats. The women were on one side of the table, and Arjun sat between Dan and an empty chair. He pulled out his phone and texted Erica under the table: You invited Nisha??
Yeah, so? came the reply. I thought you two were friends.
We ARE friends.
So, what’s your problem?
Arjun thought about this for a moment. I thought this was going to be a double date, he texted.
Well, now it’s a triple date.
Arjun frowned. Triple date? he replied. He turned to the empty chair to his right, and suddenly, it hit him like a semi-truck full of bricks.
As if on cue, Arjun heard footsteps behind him. He turned to see a tall, unfairly handsome man walking towards the table. The man had an easy, confident way about him, with jet-black hair and eyes as blue as a Caribbean sky. He smiled at Nisha, and Arjun felt his heart drop.
“Everyone, this is Patrick,” Nisha said. Her eyes locked with Arjun’s for a moment, as though she were introducing Patrick specifically to him.
“Patrick is one of my colleagues at the hospital,” Erica said helpfully as he took the seat beside Arjun. “I thought he and Nisha would hit it off, and it looks like they have! Their first date was yesterday. What did you two do?”
“We went to Cal Sciences in Golden Gate Park,” Patrick said. “Have you been? It’s one of my favorite places in the city. Nisha liked it too, right?”
“It was fantastic,” she said. “There was an incredible garden, with butterflies flying all around you. We must have spent hours there, just looking at all the different species.”
Arjun imagined Nisha and this handsome stranger, arm in arm and surrounded by butterflies. It must have been steamy in that enclosure. Had they held hands? Had they kissed? Arjun felt his stomach clench into a knot of jealousy.
“It’s nice to meet you,” he told Patrick, extending his hand. The other man’s grip was as firm as oak. Why do I have such a problem with this? Arjun asked himself angrily. You’re engaged to Sophia. Nisha is allowed to date other people.
The waiter arrived with a bottle of wine, which he began pouring into glasses for everyone at the table. “So, Patrick,” said Arjun, “what kind of doctor are you?”
Patrick sipped on his wine. “I’m a gynecologist,” he said with a faint smile.
Arjun nodded. “Oh? That’s quite the choice. Was there something about the female anatomy that appealed to you?”
Erica shot Arjun a withering glance, but Patrick only chuckled good-naturedly. “I know it seems weird,” he admitted. “When I was doing my undergrad at Brown, I spent a summer in Uganda, helping to set up a hospital for a small village. While I was in Africa, I really got a sense of health disparities around the world, and how stark the picture can be for women and girls especially. That’s what my foundation does, actually—four times a year, we spend a week in Uganda, conducting routine preventative screenings like mammograms and pap smears.”
Nisha smiled at Patrick. “That’s amazing,” she said, resting her hand on his.
Arjun felt like he wanted to scream. “Brown, huh?” he said instead. “It’s a fine school. I went to Yale, but who cares about things like college rankings—ow!” Something slammed into Arjun’s shin under the table, and he looked up to see Erica staring daggers at him.
“Arjun,” she said icily, “I think I dropped something by the bathrooms. Do you want to help me come find it?”
“I think I’m fine here,” he said, rubbing his leg. The spot where she’d kicked him had already risen into a small lump.
Her eyes narrowed. “ Arjun .”
“Fine,” he said. He limped away from the table and followed her toward the bathrooms at the other end of the dining room. “What did you drop?”
Erica smacked him on the arm. “I didn’t drop anything, you moron. Why are you acting like such an ass?”
“Stop hitting me!” he protested. “And I’m not acting like an ass. I’m having a great time, actually.”
“No, you’re being a child.” She shook her head. “Is this about Nisha?”
Arjun leaned against the wall and crossed his arms. “What are you talking about?”
“Don’t play dumb with me,” she retorted. “I know something is going on between you two. And, if I’m being brutally honest, some part of me thinks you got on board with marrying Sophia so quickly because you have feelings for Nisha, and this is your way of pushing them away. But, Arjun, let me ask you this: if Nisha asked you to get together right now, would you drop everything and be with her?”
Arjun sighed. He thought once more of their kiss, of their moment on the bench. But those had just been mistakes. He and Nisha had said as much. Just mistakes…
Right?
You’re engaged to Sophia now , he told himself, a phrase that was quickly becoming a refrain.
“I wouldn’t be with her,” he said. His voice was hushed, barely rising above the soft classical music playing over the speakers.
Erica stroked his arm. “In that case, you have to let Nisha move on. You decided—you chose Sophia. And you have no right to punish Nisha for your own decisions.”
Arjun sighed. “You’re right,” he said. “As usual.”
Erica smiled softly. “Now, if I take you back to the table with me, can you be civilized?”
He nodded. “Yes.”
“Good,” she said, and led him back to the table.
The main course had arrived when they sat down again. Sophia leaned over to Arjun. “Is everything all right with your friend? Did she find what she was looking for?”
“What?” Arjun had been forcing himself to focus on the delicious-smelling plate of pesto gnocchi that the server had placed in front of him, instead of whatever Patrick was whispering to Nisha that was making her laugh so much.
“The thing she’s looking for,” said Sophia. “She said she dropped something by the bathroom.”
“Right,” replied Arjun. “No, she didn’t. Hopefully it turns up.” His eyes flitted briefly to Nisha, then returned to his pasta.
Dan had begun telling Patrick about his wedding plans. “We’ve just changed venues last minute,” he said. “We had originally booked a small chapel in Loma Vista, but our first-choice location opened up, and we had to snap it up. So, we’re getting married at the San Francisco Conservatory of Flowers.”
Patrick nodded approvingly. “I would’ve done the same,” he said. “The Conservatory is beautiful—especially this time of year. Still, I imagine getting a new venue adds to the stress.”
Dan nodded. “No kidding.”
“When’s the wedding?” Sophia asked, covering her mouth with her hand as she chewed.
“May 31st,” Erica replied.
“Shoot,” Sophia said. “I’ll be out of town.”
Dan smiled at her. “Don’t worry,” he said. “We’re live streaming it.”
Dinner ended, and the evening wound down. Sophia and Patrick had both needed to use the restroom, so Arjun and Nisha found themselves standing alone on the curb, waiting for their partners to emerge. Arjun was staring into a streetlamp, trying to appear as nonchalant as possible—but he could sense Nisha’s gaze boring into him. “So, what did you think of Patrick?” she asked.
Arjun thought back to his conversation with Erica, and his shin began to throb again. “He’s great,” he said, turning toward her. “I’m happy for you, Nisha.”
She smiled. “I was afraid to put myself out there, believe it or not. But I’m writing again, aren’t I? And, if I can embrace imperfection in that area of my life…well. I suppose, at the end of the day, I really don’t want to be alone forever.”
They stood silently for a moment, each unsure of the next thing to say—painfully aware of the lingering silence. “Any news on your restaurant, by the way?” Nisha asked. “It’s been a while since you’ve told me anything about it.”
He nodded. “I sent an email to the property owner, and he gave me a call the other day. He told me that he’d lower the price by a third if I signed the lease this week.”
“That’s incredible. Are you going to sign?”
“I still don’t know,” Arjun said, sighing. “I mean, am I really ready for this? To take the big leap?”
She chuckled softly.
“What?” he asked.
“You’re ready,” she said. “In fact, I’d bet that you’ve been ready for months now.”
She was right, of course. Arjun had worked out every last detail regarding his restaurant, from the dishes he’d serve, to the décor, to the font that he’d use on the menus. He would never be more prepared than he was in that moment.
“I’m afraid,” he admitted, his voice barely a whisper. “To put in an offer, I mean. All this time, it’s just been an idea—actually buying the restaurant would make it real. What if it fails?”
Nisha shrugged. “Then at least you’ll know,” she said. “So, come on. Will you do it?”
What was it about Nisha that made him want to run toward his fears? What power did she have that she could short-circuit his instinct for self-protection? “I’ll call him back tomorrow,” he said. “Promise.”
“ Today ,” she insisted.
Arjun sighed. He pulled out his phone and punched in the owner’s number. “Voicemail,” he told Nisha.
“So? Leave one. He’ll get back to you.”
Arjun called back. “Bruce, it’s Arjun Chowdhury,” he said, his eyes never leaving Nisha’s, the way that green looked different in the darkness: lush and deep, a jungle full of mystery and hope. “We’d spoken recently about the vacant restaurant on Hayes Street. I’m ready to submit a bid. Please call me back as soon as you can.”
Arjun hung up the phone, his heart racing. His chest was full of a feeling somewhere between panic and exhilaration. “There,” he said. “Are you satisfied?”
Nisha grinned. “Extremely.”
They stood, not saying anything, for a few moments. “Thank you,” he said. “I never would have pushed myself to do this without your help. I’m a cautious person—too cautious—but you…you make me want to take risks. So, thank you.”
She stepped closer. “I care about you, Arjun,” she said. “You’re my favorite person in San Francisco. I don’t want that to change, okay?”
He nodded. “Of course,” he said. “I’m here for you.” Without thinking, he opened his arms, and they embraced. It felt so good to hold her, to feel the warmth of her body against his.
“Arjun,” said a voice emerging from the restaurant. It was Sophia. “Are you ready to go?”
He hastily pulled away from Nisha. “Yeah,” he said. “Yeah, I’m ready. Good night, Nisha.”
“Good night,” she replied.
The Uber pulled to the curb, and Arjun opened the door for Sophia before getting in on the other side.
Sophia stared at Nisha through her window as they drove off. “I have a favor to ask you,” she told Arjun as the restaurant faded from view. “I don’t know if we’re at the point where I can actually ask you favors—but we’re getting married, so what the hell. I know Nisha is your friend, but is there…Can you stop hanging out with her?”
Arjun frowned. “What do you mean? Why would you ask me that?”
She sighed. “It’s just…I noticed her acting kind of weird during dinner. Like she was trying to make you jealous with that Patrick guy or something. You know, rubbing him in your face like that? Anyway, just…can you not see her anymore, please?”
Arjun kept his eyes on the road. He nodded. “Of course, Sophia,” he said, weaving his fingers through hers.
That was a lie, though. It was Friday, and Arjun would see Nisha at their office on Monday morning.