48. Daisy
48
DAISY
I didn’t have to work today, thank God. I stayed in bed until the afternoon.
My dad kept coming into my bedroom, tiptoeing to try not to wake me, and checking my temperature.
“Dad, if you just walked normally, it wouldn’t make this much noise.” I pulled the covers down.
“I’m worried about my Daisychain.” He sat on the edge of my bed and set a plate of toast and tea on the nightstand. “I just want you to be okay.”
“I’ll be fine, Dad,” I lied. “I have to go to class.”
“Your mom’s going to make your favorite for dinner—sloppy joes, onion rings, and potato salad. I told her we can’t be expected to eat whole grains at a time like this.” He blew his nose.
“Thanks, Dad.”
After washing off the grime but not the heartbreak, I padded out into the living room, where Alex was modeling one of her wedding dresses.
Yes, one of . My sister bought several because she couldn’t make up her mind.
“Okay, that’s option two—”
“Alex! Mom, she’s wearing my jewelry.”
“I just wanted to see what it would look like. I think it looks so much better on me.” She preened in front of the mirror Drew was propping up while he scrolled on his phone.
It rankled that she did.
“I’m selling it,” I snapped, trying to snatch the tiara off her head.
Alex clamped her hands down on her head.
“You don’t need the money. You’re living with Mom and Dad.”
“Mom!”
“Daisy, can’t you share with your little sisters?”
“No!”
“What if I make lava cake for dessert?” my mom offered.
“I do like lava cake.” I scowled at Alex. “Fine. You want bad-juju jewelry? That’s on you.”
“I made lobster salad,” my mom said as she coaxed me out to the terrace. “And homemade sourdough.”
I grabbed a bottle of gin from the wet bar.
“It’s afternoon,” I told my mother when she pursed her mouth. “And I just got divorced. I’m allowed to drink.”
“You really want to be drunk in class?” she sighed, applying sunscreen to my face.
“It’s an English lit class,” Drew said, swiping a spoonful of lobster salad. “It probably makes more sense drunk.”
I stared dejectedly at the lobster roll in front of me. My mom made it just like I liked it—nice and creamy with chives and a bit of lemon on buttered toast.
It was the perfect summer-afternoon lunch. If I were still with Aaron, I could have made it for him. We could have sat outside with some gin-spiked lemonade.
Why didn’t Aaron choose me? Why would he choose his mother’s delusions over me?
Because I wasn’t worth it. If I had been better, thinner, prettier, more capable of taking care of him, maybe then he would have stood by me.
“I was a bad wife,” I sobbed over my lobster roll.
“I’m just going to take that before you ruin it,” Drew said, sliding my plate away as my mom hugged me to her chest.
“You weren’t a bad wife.” My mom stroked my back.
“Yes, I was. I can’t cook like you. I can’t make a garden nice like you. I don’t even look as good in a hat.”
“You’re beautiful, Daisy. You’re my beautiful, wonderful daughter. Aaron is missing out.” My mom cupped my tearstained face.
My dad came careening out onto the terrace with a box of tissues, startling Dorian, who was eating his own helping of lobster.
“Wyatt, why don’t you go see if Alex wants some thoughts on her wedding ensemble?” My mom shooed him away.
“Darling”—my mom took my hands—“this isn’t your fault. Your dad and I never should have asked you to marry Aaron.”
“I had to save the family.”
She petted my hair. “I know you wanted to help. But it really wasn’t fair.”
“It’s okay.” I hiccupped. “We can’t survive out in the real world. We needed the money.”
“But you didn’t need to get your heart broken.” Again, she stroked my hair tenderly.
“It just feeds my art,” I tried to joke.
“Now, I don’t want to pressure you, Daisy, but I know you’re going to be done with your PhD soon…”
“No, I don’t know what I’m doing with my life!” I interjected. “I thought I was going to have babies. Maybe that’s what scared him off.” I sobbed.
My mom petted my hair once more. “It’s perfectly normal to want a family with your husband. I already had you and your sister when I was your age.”
“Now I feel even more like a loser.”
“I’m sorry to upset you, Daisy. I just wanted to see if you wanted to work on my next cookbook with me, put that English degree to good use.”
“My PhD is not about cooking. It’s about early American literature.”
“I think the skills can be transferable,” my mom said delicately.
“I don’t think they can,” I wailed. “I’m a failure. Aaron didn’t want me, and now I have to see him at work, and he’s going to date a twenty-year-old and parade her around like Leonardo DiCaprio.”
“Why don’t you quit the coffee-cart job?” my dad suggested anxiously, poking his head back outside.
“Why does everyone want me to quit the coffee cart?” I screeched. “I’m good at making coffee.”
“Oh, Daisy.” My mom sighed.
“And Drew’s eating all my food.”
“I saved some,” he said around a mouthful of my sandwich.
“That’s my sandwich. I’m sick of all the men in my life using me. You just take, take, take, take. You and Aaron!”
“I bought you a candy bar. Didn’t you give that to her, Peggy?” my father begged as I chased my brother around the terrace.
“Um…” Alex poked her head out. “I just want to say that I did not order all these flowers, and I don’t want them counting against my wedding budget.”
Blinking as my eyes adjusted to the interior dim, I followed her into the living room.
Now the room was filled with flowers. Thousands of flowers. And delivery men were wheeling more in.
“Did Cousin Gertie finally die?” Granny Madge walked out into the living room, yawning. “Ooh, Daisy’s getting a head start on being a single girl. I like it.” She waggled her eyebrows at the delivery guys.
“Did you do this, Wyatt?” my mom demanded.
“I’ve been doing that financial literacy course you made me take. You have all my credit cards,” my dad said hastily.
“It’s so romantic,” Jordan said with a swoon.
Brooklyn handed me a card. “It’s from Aaron! He wants you back!”
The message in the card was written in his neat cursive.
I’m sorry.
“There are more.” Jordan tugged me, pointing at more cards stuck among the cascading bouquets.
I made a mistake.
I was wrong.
Coleman, please forgive me.
“He sent treats too!” Drew dug into a box of heart shaped chocolate truffles.
“He even sent prezzies for the cat!” Alex cooed, holding up a basket filled with toys, cat treats, and another note.
I hope Dorian isn’t too angry about the cat carrier.
“We better put that fish in the fridge.” My mother collected it.
“I think you’re feeding that cat too much,” Granny Madge stated, selecting a gourmet cookie.
“Take him back,” the twins demanded with mouths full of chocolate and pastries.
“Don’t feel pressured, Daisy,” Alex said before burying her face in one of the lush bouquets of flowers. “I’m about to get married, and Trey and I want a big family. You can be the weird single aunt.”
“I don’t care,” I said hotly, dumping a bundle of flowers in the trash. “Aaron can’t just toy with people like this. He wants something. And whatever it is, I’m not giving it to him.”
“Sex,” Gran said flatly. “The man realized too late that tits like those don’t grow on trees, and no, that plastic surgeon you found in Miami isn’t going to make those bee stings look like your sister’s, Alex.”
“So he thinks he can just love bomb me and I’ll come running back to him? Like he’s changed in the, oh, eight hours since he broke up with me?” I screeched. “I do not miss the sex that much.”
“Yes, she does,” Drew snickered.
I threw a bouquet at him. “I’m going to class.”
“You didn’t eat your lobster roll,” my mom called. “Hold on. I’ll make you another one.”
I ripped open the nearest box of cookies.
“Don’t bother. I’m late.”
Aaron was waiting for me outside of my parents’ high-rise.
“I’m so sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. I never should have—”
“So now you’re stalking me?” I shrieked when he grabbed me.
“I’m not giving up, Coleman,” he said. “I made a horrible mistake.”
“You lost your sex toy, and now you’ve got blue balls.”
I stomped past him and then realized I had the box of cookies in my hand.
“You liked the cookies?” he asked desperately. “They’re from a small shop in—”
“I hate them.” I glared at him and dumped them into a nearby trash can.
“I won’t give up on us.” He grabbed my hand.
“You better because I’m done. I’m sick of being used by you. Leave me alone.”
I watched him get in a waiting car and drive off. Then I dug the cookies back out of the trash can.
They were good but not as good as a lobster roll.
After classes ended, I had to stay late to talk with my thesis advisor.
“I know you had some personal issues, but you can’t let that get in the way of the work,” she said.
“It won’t. I’ll have a lot of free time coming up,” I promised.
“Good, because I think this is an interesting topic—love and betrayal in Victorian fiction.”
“I have some firsthand experience.”
It was raining when I finally left with lots of notes and more suggestions for essays and books to read.
I raced through the rain, hugging my bag to my chest to protect my books. Not only was I starving, but I didn’t have an umbrella.
Because I didn’t plan ahead.
Like I didn’t plan with Aaron and let him run away with my heart.
I screamed when a man grabbed me in the dark.
“Coleman.”
I blinked away the rain.
“I knew you’d forget an umbrella.” He gave me a crooked smile.
“No, you didn’t. You don’t know anything about me.” I snatched the umbrella from Aaron, leaving him to stand in the rain.
Yet, as I headed home in the dark, I felt him out there somewhere, watching over me.
More flowers and presents awaited me at the coffee cart the next morning.
“Are you seriously giving him another chance?”
“Hell no.”
I tore into the meticulously wrapped gift that I’d bet my right ovary that Betty had taken care of.
Reese inhaled a walnut and coughed. “That’s a first edition of Jane Eyre … and it’s annotated ? Girl, that makes your wedding jewelry look like chump change.”
“I cannot be bought.”
“Oh my god, these are from Chocolaterie élysée.” She opened another box.
“We need to raise our standards,” I said, stuffing one of the truffles in my mouth. “Yum! Sea salt and caramel.”
“We should have split that! Friends share.”
“I’m the one who got my heart broken.”
“You’re lucky he bought several of each.” Reese browsed through the box.
My eyes rolled back in my head. “An espresso would go amazing with this.”
We sat down on the floor behind the coffee cart counter, sipping our espresso and eating our treats. Reese read the note Aaron wrote that was tucked in with the book.
“He even used acid-free paper and archival ink to write this,” she marveled.
“I have for the first time found what I can truly love–I have found you.”
Jane eventually loved her monster. Please, darling, love me.
“Aww, he did a literary quote.”
“I thought we didn’t like him,” I said petulantly. “We’re being free single girls.”
“Full disclosure, I may be going on a date, but not until next week. It’s with Chet. We hooked up at the bonfire. All that polo playing gives a man really nice thighs. I never really thought about it until—sorry, I know this is your season of divorce! I just want you to be making decisions with all the facts.” She made a face.
“I don’t trust any of this.” I glared at the chocolate. “Granny Madge thinks he just wants to blow his load in something.”
“So you’re not going to take him back?” Reese pressed. “You could hold this over his head forever and ever. You’d have all the cards in the relationship. Maybe just talk to him?”
I looked down at the note and book in my hands.
“I—I don’t know if I can.”