36. Burning Skin #2
I felt it too. It simmered just beneath my skin, fire racing through my veins like liquid starlight. But just as it began to crest, it slammed against an invisible barrier. My magic crashed against it, hissing and spitting like waves against a cliff face. But it wouldn’t splash over.
"Xül," I breathed, my voice cracking.
“You’re such a stubborn little thing,” he growled.
And then his lips claimed mine.
The kiss shattered every expectation, every experience that had come before.
This wasn't the tentative exploration of the boys in Saltcrest. This was possession, pure and primal.
His lips were firm and demanding, coaxing mine open.
When his tongue swept into my mouth, tasting me, a sound escaped my throat—half gasp, half moan.
My body pulled against the restraints. I wanted him closer. To feel more of him. His hand tightened on my waist, pulling me harder against him as the kiss deepened, grew more desperate. His teeth grazed my lower lip, sending sparks roaring through my veins.
I was drowning in sensation. The hard press of his body against mine. The way his hand slid from my waist to my hip, fingers digging in possessively.
As I surrendered to the kiss, to him, my power swelled, threatening to burst from my skin. The stars above us pulsed in time with my racing heart, responding to my hunger—to my desire.
Xül smiled against my mouth, his hips pushing forward against mine. The hard length of him pressed into my stomach, sending a shock of need through me.
"That's it," he growled against my lips, his voice rougher than I'd ever heard it, "now be a good girl and let go."
Images flashed in my mind—his body over mine, under mine, his hands on my bare skin, his mouth everywhere. I moaned, unable to stop myself, and his kiss grew fiercer in response.
I was burning from the inside out, ready to combust, to surrender everything?—
And then he pulled away.
His sudden absence left me cold. I sagged against my restraints, chest heaving, mind reeling, body screaming for his touch.
Xül stood a few feet away as if nothing had happened. If it weren't for his swollen lips, I would have thought I'd imagined the whole thing.
"Now," he said, his voice unnervingly steady. "Use that power."
The hands released me, and I stumbled forward, flustered and embarrassed and annoyed and oddly bereft. But beneath all that churned the power he'd awakened. It was a torrent now. I reached for it, no longer grasping but surrendering to that wild energy that threatened to consume me.
The wall caved in on itself—a barrier I'd reinforced with every fearful moment, every time I'd pulled back instead of pushing forward. It shattered like glass, and power surged through the breach, flooding every cell, every nerve ending, every corner of my being.
I threw my head back and screamed as the energy ripped through me. My skin glowed from within, light seeping through my pores like I'd swallowed the sun.
I lifted both hands toward the sky and pulled the heavens down.
But no swords formed. Instead, seven motes of starlight descended, each blazing, scorching the air as they spiraled downward to circle my head.
The ground shook. Wind whipped around us in a frenzy, carrying my hair upward as if gravity no longer applied. I felt weightless, boundless, untethered from everything but this moment and this power.
"Fascinating," Xül breathed, the words almost reverent as he shielded his eyes from my radiance. "I've never seen anything like that."
I stood there, heart pounding, body still thrumming as the stars danced around my head, as the earth trembled beneath me, as the very air seemed to bow to my will. I had done more than access my power—I had unleashed it, embraced it fully.
But at what cost?
"How does it feel?" Xül asked, his voice gentler now.
I took a deep breath, assessing the sensation. Power coursed through me, different from the focused energy of my sword. This was wilder, singing through me violently.
"Different," I managed. "More... everything."
He nodded, as if my incoherent response made perfect sense. "You've been containing your power for so long, you've never fully experienced what you're capable of."
I raised a hand, feeling the starlight respond to my movement. The motes shifted, dancing around my fingers now. "What are they?"
"Pure celestial energy," Xül explained. "Not formed into a weapon, but simply manifested. More versatile than a sword, if you learn to control them."
"I thought the point was to lose control," I said, raising an eyebrow.
His lips quirked. "The point was to break through your self-imposed limitations. Now that you have, you can learn to work with your true potential, not against it."
I nodded, trying to absorb the lesson beneath the lingering ghost of his kiss. "So what now?"
"Now we practice." He gestured to the stars circling my head. "But I believe that’s enough for today," he said. "You've done well, and I don't want you to burn out. Besides, I’m needed in the Eternal City."
“Again?” I asked, trying to keep my voice steady.
“Unfortunately.” He sighed, walking towards me. “But I’ll be back tonight,” he said as he reached up to brush a strand of hair behind my ear. “If you need me.”
"I should... I should go clean up," I said, gesturing vaguely to my sweat-dampened clothes .
Xül nodded. "We'll continue tomorrow." He turned to leave, then paused. "Oh, and Thais?"
"Yes?"
His eyes held mine, intense and unreadable. "What happened today—the power you accessed—that's just the beginning."
With that, he strode away, leaving me standing alone on the black sand.
I made my way back to my chambers, mind reeling. I shed my clothes and slipped into the hot spring tub inside my quarters. The steaming water welcomed me as I sank into it, hoping to wash away my confusion along with the sweat and sand.
But as I soaked, my thoughts kept returning to Xül. To his hands, his mouth, the weight of his body against mine. To the way he'd looked at me when the stars had formed their crown around my head.
I closed my eyes, letting the water envelop me, and unbidden, my mind conjured his image. His stare pinning me in place, gaze igniting a flush I couldn’t hide. The hard lines of his jaw, the curve of his mouth when he almost smiled.
My breathing quickened as I imagined those hands—hands that could command death itself—moving over my skin. Gentle, then not so gentle. I sank deeper into the water, the warmth surrounding me transforming in my mind to the wildfire of his touch.
I pictured him here, in this room, watching me with that predatory stillness. What would he do if he saw me like this? Would he turn away? Or would he finally surrender to whatever smoldered between us?
In my mind, he chose the latter. I imagined him approaching the bath. His hands on my shoulders, sliding down my arms, leaving trails of fire in their wake. His lips at my neck, my collarbone, lower.
My fingers drifted across my skin, tracing paths I imagined his would take. The water rippled around me as I moved, my breath coming faster now. I bit my lip to keep silent.
It had been weeks now since we'd begun this dance, this flirtation that walked the edge of destruction. At first, it had been a game, a welcome distraction from grief. Something to occupy my mind when darker thoughts threatened to drag me under.
But today felt like a turning point. And that terrified me more than any trial could. Because I was starting to want things I couldn't have. Starting to feel things I shouldn't feel.
You can’t fall for him, Thais .
It was impossible, of course. Whatever attraction he felt toward me was physical, perhaps tinged with some kind of sick satisfaction or lust for the forbidden. Even more, he wasn’t mine, could never be.
I rose from the bath and dried myself, pulling on clean clothes. This was foolishness. Dangerous foolishness. I needed to focus on survival, on the goal, on everything I‘d learned and everything I had yet to.
Not on sultry eyes and wicked smiles. Not on the way my body and power both responded to his touch. Not on the dangerous spark that had ignited in my chest.
I braided my wet hair with sharp, angry movements. Tomorrow, I would be better. Tomorrow, I would remember my purpose.