Chapter 16 #2
Falcon was suddenly uncomfortable. She shifted her weight from foot to foot. “Out of respect for Viper, I’ll leave it to him to tell you more if he wants to. He’s your trainer, and that’s his story to tell.”
My mind went back to when he told me about rescuing the people and how many of them died in that meadow or never even made it out of the prison at all.
The haunted look on his face as he told me of that day stuck with me.
What if he’d found her and it was too late?
I wanted to hold him, so he knew that someone cared.
“I wish there was something I could do to help.”
Falcon smiled at me. “I think you have helped him. He’s different around you.”
My cheeks flushed involuntarily. Of course I wouldn’t know what he was like before I came into the picture, and I didn’t want to read into it more than I should. “What do you mean by that?”
“I can’t put my finger on it, but he smiles more now than he has in a long time. Maybe you gave him purpose again. Maybe he likes having someone close when he spent the last two years keeping us at a distance. It was good Commander Locke forced him to take you on as an apprentice.”
“Just don’t die or he’ll really lose his mind,” Celine said with a laugh. Falcon and I both scowled at her. “What? It was a joke.”
Falcon shook her head with an eye roll. “In bad taste, Smoke. He thinks he’s a bad trainer or has bad luck or something. Losing two apprentices in just a few short years is unlucky.”
“That’s why he’s so territorial about Bonecarver.
I know you trainers are protective over apprentices but not like him.
He hardly even takes his eyes off her. It makes sense now, he’s afraid she’ll die like the others and will blame himself.
” She turned to me with a devious smile. “I thought he was falling for you.”
“There’s nothing like that between us.” I flushed and stamped down that part of me that wished it weren’t true.
He was the most admired, sought-after assassin here, and beautiful in a way that I found it difficult not to stare at sometimes.
What would he want with me? The loth with “weird eyes” and a scarred-up hand, who kept getting her ass beat and was afraid of the dark.
“Losing his apprentices wasn’t his fault anyway, it’s these damn vampires. I hate them,” I said.
“Don’t we all?” Falcon agreed. “Viper wouldn’t break the trainer-apprentice rules even if he did feel something more for you.”
“He doesn’t.”
Celine wiggled her eyebrows at me, and I glared at her. “If you don’t want a taste, can I? I bet he’s a fun roll in the sack. Good at it too.”
Jealousy reared in me, catching me by surprise. Some part of me felt like he was mine. We’d been living together, spending every single day side by side for months. He fought Dred for me in front of everyone.
Falcon rolled her eyes and mumbled something about horny apprentices.
“Take your shot. I don’t care.” I was a liar. Liar liar liar. “Like Falcon said, a relationship between me and him is forbidden anyway.”
“Only until you become a fully fledged assassin. And besides, what’s the worst they’re going to do to Viper? His uncle will give him a stern talking-to?” Celine remarked.
“It’s not him I worry about. It’s my own reputation,” I added.
“What reputation would that be? That an apprentice from outside the wall caught the most wanted man here? Are you scared? Have you been with a man before?”
“I... um, no, but that isn’t why. I’m not scared.” She was not helping.
“God, I wish Viper could take my virginity and not Morrow.” She sighed. “Wait... how naive are you on this? Do we need to have a girl-to-girl conversation here?”
I flushed, sparing Falcon a glance. I wouldn’t consider her a friend, only a friend of Vander’s, and I didn’t feel comfortable talking about this with her around.
“Maybe another time, Smoke.” I had to change this subject.
Fast. I turned to Falcon. “So, you think he’s just having a bad day and not hurt? ”
Falcon half smiled at me, like she knew my secret infatuation with Vander. If Vander did want me, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to resist. “I’m sure he’s slightly hurt after the fight with Dred, but nothing he can’t handle. I’ve seen that man get up from attacks that would kill anyone else.”
Whatever the reason, I wanted to find him and make sure he was alright.
“If he was my trainer and I shared a room with him, I’d sleep naked every night.” Celine was bent on agitating me.
“Well, he’s not yours, he’s mine.”
Celine cocked her eyebrow. “You and I could switch places for an evening.”
Falcon burst out laughing. “Oh, I would love to see that. And I’d be waiting outside the door when he threw you out.”
A pang of jealousy hit me again as I imagined her slipping under Vander’s covers. “I’m going to look for him. See you both later.” I stepped around her and tucked the cover of the book against my chest and made my way toward the exit.
“Try sleeping naked, tell me how he reacts!” Celine called. “I need to live vicariously through you.”
I glanced back, astonished that she would say that loudly. She was out of control. Falcon shook her head. “I wouldn’t do anything to get yourself into trouble after what happened with Beast and Dred, Bonecarver.”
I certainly would not be sleeping naked next to Vander. I paused and looked back. “If anything did happen between us, you can bet no one would know about it.” I smirked for dramatics and started off again.