Chapter 18 #3
Surprise rippled in his eyes, and he tilted his head. “Mmm, I’m sure you do. I think I’ve also heard quite a few times that I’m the best assassin, legendary even.” He took out his sword to challenge me.
“Hmm, not ringing any bells.”
He smirked and something daring flashed in him. “I believe I might have even heard I’m very good in bed. Weren’t you supposed to lay naked in our room to find out?”
My stomach swooped and a flush spilled into my cheeks. Celine, that little rat. Or was it Falcon who ran and told him about our chat in the library? That was months ago too. “First of all, that wasn’t even my idea.”
He threw his head back and let out a deep belly laugh. I was going to murder her in her sleep. “So it’s true?”
“No!” I pulled my sword and raised it. “Celine was just being ridiculous. I wasn’t going to do that. I haven’t done that. Did Falcon tell you?”
“I can’t name my sources.” He started to circle, waiting for me to strike.
I glared and made sure to take a mental note that Falcon could not be trusted when it came to Vander. I swung hard and quick, our swords clashed, and I drove him back two steps.
“Damn, going for blood, I see. You must really want to take the handsome, legendary assassin home to meet your parents.”
“Oh, you’re full of yourself today, aren’t you?” It seemed the sunshine and the coming end of winter was doing both of us good.
Metal cracked against metal as we went at each other.
The roof we were on was slanted and some of the shingles were loose, forcing me to concentrate on my feet more than usual.
He blocked everything I threw at him, high strikes, quick jabs, and swings.
I backstepped and ducked under his blade.
To show off, I dipped into a back handspring and readied myself for his next attack.
He paused, looking genuinely impressed. “When did you learn that?”
“On my own. While you were on one of your nighttime adventures. Where do you go anyway?” I’d never called him out on it before.
He went very still, and his face tensed as if I’d caught him doing something wrong.
“What? You didn’t think I’d notice you leave for hours at a time?” I smiled at him and swung. He easily dodged and struck back.
“Sometimes I just need to be alone in the fresh air.”
I sensed I was getting close to the edge of the roof and turned.
With a leap, I made it to the other rooftop.
He landed beside me, and we went straight back to sparring.
The sounds of our blades echoed off the next building, ping, clang, whoosh.
“I’m not judging you. I like to be alone sometimes too.
You going out gave me time to learn back handsprings without you laughing at me.
I can do the splits now. Want to see?” I dropped into the splits, then swung my leg at him, and to my surprise, swept his feet out from under him.
His back hit the tiled roof and I pounced.
My blade was at the base of his throat and my knee sunk into his hard abdomen.
Triumph made my heart soar. “Do you concede, Viper?” I lightly bit my lower lip, trying to fight off smiling.
“I do,” he said, eyes softening.
I pressed my hand to his chest and pulled my blade from his throat. “Your heart is beating fast.” It drummed hard beneath my palm. “Do we need to work on your endurance?” I teased.
“My endurance is perfect.” His blue eyes settled on mine. His voice was huskier than usual, and that intensity I sometimes felt when touching him roared within me. Like a hot flash of lightning shooting through my veins.
I jerked my hand away and jumped up. I pulled my gaze from his and looked across the city, anywhere but him. A flock of geese flew in above. That was a good distraction. “So, now we go see my family.”
He smiled despite having lost. But I was positive he let me win. In a quick motion, he went from his back to his feet and stood. “Just don’t tell anyone. We can go after the game.”
“Race you back?”
We ran along the rooftops toward Drakthar.
I cleared roof gaps easily and pulled myself up to higher levels with grace when I needed to.
All without making a sound. My crippled hand wasn’t a thought anymore, although I still kept it covered with a glove always.
I hadn’t even broken a sweat by the time we made it back to Drakthar.
When we got to our tower room, an envelope was attached to the door. Vander took it down and we settled into our usual routine. I plopped onto my bed while he went to his side. Paper tore and his feet shuffled.
I tugged off my boots and opened my bedside drawer to pull out the carving and the tool I needed.
Sitting cross-legged on the bed, I pressed the sharp tip against the bone and made a small cut among the snake scales.
I’d tossed out two different carvings in the last few months because I didn’t like the way the snake looked.
This one, however, was coming along perfectly. I was almost finished.
“You’re suddenly very quiet,” I said, making quick chisels.
No reply. I glanced toward the dark curtain separating us. I thought he must have gone into the washroom. I needed to wash the sweat away myself after our sword match. But then his bed creaked and I swore I heard him mutter a curse.
“Viper?”
He cleared his throat. “Yeah?”
“Was the note something for the game?” Maybe it was delayed.
Quiet again. Soft steps pattered and he came around the curtain. I hurriedly dropped the carving into the drawer so he wouldn’t see it and turned—the downward curve of his mouth as he gripped the paper and envelope chilled me. His light mood had completely shifted.
“It’s from Commander Ace.”
“Am I in trouble for something?”
His eyes dropped for a moment and he shook his head. “I’m sorry,” he said softly, holding it out to me.
I’m sorry? I gulped, and my hand shook as I took it. I held his gaze, afraid to look down at the words. “What?” I whispered.
“Read the letter.”
I took a deep breath and found the elegant writing.
I regret to inform you that we have received word from Chieftain Eric of Neverglade that there have been two deaths in Aesira Havarsdotter’s immediate family. Her mother Seriah died from childbed fever shortly after the birth of the child. The baby boy also passed from a fever days later.
You have my condolences,
Commander Ace
I read it three times before tears welled up and dripped onto the page.
This couldn’t be. I did the calculations in my head.
It would have happened before the first snow, based on how far along the pregnancy was when I left and I was just now being told?
Correspondence between Lothleton and Nighthaven wasn’t quick—but months?
I didn’t believe it. I crumpled the note, let it fall to the floor.
I clutched at my chest and started pacing.
No. It had to be a mistake. I shoved my hands into my hair.
My heart squeezed and ached; died from childbed fever.
My throat felt like it was closing. I’d heard of this sickness before, but she was healthy and strong. As strong as any woman I’d ever known.
“Aesira.” Vander’s voice was reverent. It was the first time he’d used my real name in months and caused me to pause. He took a step toward me, and I backed off. I needed to see Commander Ace. I needed proof this was true. I turned on my heel, and in a few strides, I was out the door.
“Aesira, wait,” Vander called. I ran through the halls of Drakthar. The torches and carvings in the stone blurring as I passed. Vander was right behind me. “Bonecarver, talk to me.”
I went faster. Someone stepped around a corner, and I slammed into the man, knocking him into the wall.
“Watch it!” he yelled. “Where’s your manners?”
“Leave her be,” Vander snapped back.
I ran up a set of stairs, down a long corridor with portraits of past leadership lining the walls.
I shoved through Commander Ace’s door without knocking.
Her quill stopped and she looked up from her desk.
That severe look she always wore didn’t falter.
There was no surprise in her expression, just stone.
“Who told you that my mother died? And the baby?” I could barely control my breathing.
I needed to see Eric’s writing to believe it.
I couldn’t have spent the last couple months playing assassin while my mother was dead and buried in the cold ground.
I would have known somehow, wouldn’t I? I would have felt it, dreamed it. .. something.
Taking hold of a letter from her desktop, she stood and held it out. I jerked it from her grasp and read the words of my mother and the baby’s passing yet again, signed by Chieftain Eric. I recognized his signature. I’d seen it many times while over at Kace’s home.
A heavy stone dropped in my gut.
“I’m very sorry, Bonecarver.” Commander Ace’s tone was formal and without feeling. She delivered news of deaths all the time to families and had no doubt grown numb to it.
In a daze, I left her study and pressed my back against the wall outside her door. I couldn’t lose my composure in front of the Commander.
It didn’t feel real. I didn’t want to believe my mother was gone and the sweet little baby brother that didn’t even have a chance at life.
“I’ll remind you, Viper, that she is not allowed to go home until after her training is complete.” The Commander’s voice drifted out through the crack in her chamber door.
“Her mother and baby brother died, Commander,” Vander said, defensively.
“I understand that. And I feel for her just as I do with anyone who loses family, but you know the rules. No one gets to go home during their apprenticeship. Especially with the second apprentice game days away. If you want your chance at Dravyn Knox, she needs to do well.”
“Commander?” he questioned.
Silent tears slid down my cheeks, and I pressed myself harder against the wall. I balled my hands into fists, digging my nails into my palms. A scream waited at the back of my throat.
“He will be our next mission. The winning team will get to participate in his assassination. And if you want to be a part of it, she must be ready to go with you.”
“You’re certain he’s back?”
“He’s back,” she confirmed.
I didn’t know who they were talking about and I didn’t care. I walked away through the halls feeling like I was underwater. Everything around me sounded muffled. My vision tunneled only to what was directly ahead of me. By the time I got to my room, I couldn’t remember walking from the Commander’s.
I fell onto my bed and broke into sobs. I wasn’t even there for my mother.
I never even saw my baby brother. Did I even say goodbye to her when I left?
Did I hug her? I didn’t think I’d told her I loved her in a long time.
That tension between us was always there—her silent judgment of what had happened to her mother because of me.
I wouldn’t have a chance to make that better now.
I would have told her how sorry I was that her mom died. I would have told her that I loved her no matter what. My father, oh, my father, he wouldn’t make it without her. He loved her more than anything in this world.
I felt a hand on my back and then the weight of Vander settled beside me. “I am so sorry, Aesira.”
I curled around my pink blanket, the one she’d made me, and cried harder.
I was never going to see her again to tell her I was an assassin.
Or see her smile or hear her voice. I felt like I couldn’t breathe and sat up, trying to catch my breath.
Firm hands settled on my shoulders. My bottom lip trembled as I faced him.
He gently swiped his thumbs across my cheeks. “Nothing I say will make you feel better, but I’m here, and I care about you.”
I crumbled against his chest and screamed into it.
I felt him tremble and his arms tightened around me.
“I’m so sorry.” He laid us down on my bed and he gently stroked my hair.
“We’ll still go see your family like I promised.
We’ll just need to wait a few weeks, so Commander Ace doesn’t suspect it. If we go too soon someone will notice.”
I wanted to leave right then, the League and Commander Ace be damned, but with the snow still on the ground it would be better to wait. We could easily be tracked to my home.
Sometime after I stopped crying, I fell asleep. I dreamed of my father and brother digging her grave, of the baby wrapped in white in her arms, and I woke up panicking. Vander was still beside me, still curled against me to hold me in my sorrow.