Chapter 39
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
DYLAN
Mia’s curled into my side like she belongs there, her legs tangled with mine, the edge of my duvet pulled up to her chin.
She’s quiet, but not in that closed-off way she sometimes gets when she’s stuck in her own head.
This is something softer. Quieter. Like her defences are down for once, and I get to see the real her; the version behind the tough sarcasm and all that stubborn self-control.
I can feel her phone still tucked between us, pressed to her chest. She hasn’t moved since she read whatever message came through. But her breathing’s steady, her cheek warm against my arm.
“You gonna tell me what that was?” I murmur.
She hums, her eyes still closed. “Just my mum. My dad, he asked about me.”
I don’t say anything. I just shift a little, so I can see her face better, and let my fingers drift lazily through her hair.
“That good or bad?” I ask.
“Both,” she says, a faint smile ghosting her lips. “He said he was proud.”
There’s a crack in her voice that punches straight through me. I press a kiss to her forehead, it’s gentle and warm. Mia sinks deeper into me. We lie there a while longer as the clock ticks softly. The world’s gone still.
And for once, I don’t feel like I’m racing to catch up or faking something I can’t quite feel. I don’t want to be anywhere else.
It’s terrifying.
And perfect.
Eventually, Mia shifts. Sits up a little and pushes her hair back, blinking at me like she forgot where she is.
“Sorry,” she mutters. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you.”
“I wasn’t complaining,” I say, smirking. “If anything, I was thinking about how to trap you here forever.”
“Trap me, huh?”
“Yeah. Tie you to the radiator. Stockholm Syndrome you into staying.”
“That’s dark, Diesel.” Her brow furrows as she side-eyes me.
“You love it.”
She laughs, and God, it’s a sound I want to bottle. A sound I’ll never tire of hearing. But then her eyes drift around the room, and that edge of reality creeps back in. Her shoulders go tight again.
I know what she’s thinking. I’ve been thinking it too.
She climbs out of bed, stretching her arms overhead, she’s all bare legs, oversized shirt, and bare feet on my hardwood floor, and I swear I forget how to breathe for a second.
“I should probably head home,” she says.
“Why?”
She glances at me. “Because it’s nearly midnight, and I have work in the morning, and technically I’m not supposed to be here.”
I sit up on the couch. “You mean with me.”
She gives me a look that says, don’t make this harder than it already is.
I scrub a hand through my hair. “You know this can’t stay a secret forever.”
“I know,” she says quietly.
“I’m not asking you to make some big announcement. But I don’t want us to sneak around like I’m some dirty secret forever.”
“You’re not,” she says instantly. “You’re not.”
She moves closer again, kneeling in front of me on the bed, hands sliding over my knees. “This… whatever this is, it’s the only thing keeping me sane right now.”
I reach out and cup her face in my hands. “Then let me take you out.”
Mia blinks. “What?”
“An actual date. Food. Drinks. Clothes that aren’t falling off you every time I breathe near you,”
She swats my chest. “Don’t act like you don’t live for that.”
“I do. But I also wanna be able to look across a table and see you laughing at something dumb I said. I wanna see you in public. I want… I dunno, people to know I’m punching way above my weight.”
Mia chews on her bottom lip, hesitation flickering across her face. “We’d get spotted.”
“Maybe. Maybe not.”
“No, not maybe. Someone would see us. And then I’d be the team physio who couldn’t keep her hands off a player, and it wouldn’t matter that I’m good at my job, or that I worked my arse off to get here…”
“Mia.”
She falls quiet.
“I get it,” I say. “I do. And if that’s the price of this, I’ll pay it. I’ll sneak around with you, I’ll lie through my teeth, I’ll pretend we don’t spend every night thinking about each other, because it’s worth it. You’re worth it. But don’t think for a second, I’m okay with hiding this forever.”
Her eyes shine like she might cry. She doesn’t, though. Mia Clarke doesn’t cry unless it’s behind a locked door.
I reach for her hand. “Let’s do something lowkey. One night. You and me. No teammates. No rink. No pretending you don’t want to jump me every five seconds.”
That earns me a half-laugh. “You make it really hard to say no, you know that?”
“Is that a yes?”
She hesitates. Then nods. “Fine. One date.”
I grin. “I’ll make it good.”
“You better.”
“I’ll wine and dine the hell out of you.”
Mia narrows her eyes. “If you take me to Nando’s, I swear to god…”
“Wow. You think so little of me.”
“I know you. I’ve seen your lunch orders.”
I lean in, lips brushing hers. “Don’t worry, baby. I’ve got plans.”
She kisses me back. It’s slow and intentional. It doesn’t take much to heat things up again. One look, one touch, and we’re going at it like we haven’t already torn each other apart twice tonight.
She ends up back on my lap, grinding slow and dirty, her hands in my hair while mine slide under her T-shirt. There’s no better view. I could watch Mia come apart every second of every day. It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
After, when she’s in the bathroom stealing my toothpaste and muttering something about the travesty of two-in-one shampoo, I’m sprawled on the bed, arms folded behind my head, trying to get my heart rate under control.
I’ve had flings. There’s been girls. But none of them ever made my chest feel like this. Like there’s a rope wound tight around my ribs every time she looks at me, and I’m half afraid it’ll snap, and half afraid it won’t.
When she comes back, wearing nothing but a towel, I feel it again. That heavy, aching want that’s somehow got nothing to do with sex and everything to do with her.
She climbs into bed beside me, tucks herself under my arm like she’s been doing it forever.
“I hate this part,” she whispers.
“What part?”
“The leaving part.”
My chest tightens. “Then don’t.”
She shifts to look at me.
“Stay,” I say, brushing her hair off her face. “Just stay tonight. No sneaking out. No alarm. Just you and me.”
She bites her lip. “You’re dangerous, Diesel.” There’s a small giggle leaves her lips as her nose wrinkles, and my heart swells. I fucking love it when she calls me Diesel.
“Only to your professionalism.” I lean forward and nip the tip of her nose with me teeth before I plant a kiss on her cheek. She laughs against my neck. Before she snuggles down under the covers and stays.
In the morning, she’s still there. Still curled into my side, her body warm and soft against mine. The sun’s starting to break through the blinds, casting gold across her bare shoulder. She stirs a little, her hand sliding over my chest like it belongs there.
I kiss the top of her head and whisper, “Good morning, trouble.”
She groans. “It’s too early.”
“Want breakfast?” I ask as my fingers make slow steady trails up and down her bare back. It was just after four this morning when she lost the T-shirt she was wearing and we fell into another round of nude wrestling.
“Only if you make it naked.” She presses her face into the pillow, trying to hide her laughter.
“I’ll burn the house down.”
“I’ll take the risk.”
I grin into her hair.
Maybe this isn’t easy. Maybe it’s messy and complicated and comes with more risk than either of us signed up for.
But when she finally looks up at me, sleepy and beautiful and completely mine, I know I’m in it for the long haul.
All the way in.