Chapter 10 Guardian of Chaos
For a moment that stretched into a small eternity, the only sound in the conference room was the ghost of a squeak from Leo’s marker.
The two words Julian had spoken—Try it—seemed to hang in the air, shimmering like a heat haze.
They were simple words, clinical even, yet they landed in Leo’s chest with the force of a full orchestral crescendo.
He could feel the vibration of them behind his ribs, a warm, terrifying hum that threatened to undo him completely.
He said yes. He actually said yes.
The thought was so loud, so ridiculously triumphant, that Leo was half-convinced he’d shouted it.
He gripped the marker tighter, his knuckles white, his gaze locked on the chaotic explosion of lines and circles he’d scrawled across the pristine whiteboard.
It wasn’t a wireframe or a user-flow diagram; it was a feeling, an idea given frantic, messy form.
It was pure, unadulterated Leo. And Julian Thorne, the human equivalent of a sterile laboratory, had just given it his blessing.
Then, the spell broke.
Anya, a user interface designer who usually spoke in hushed, reverent tones about kerning, let out a slow whistle. “Okay. So, a non-linear emotional journey. I… don’t hate it.”
“Hate it? It’s brilliant,” David, from marketing, chimed in, leaning forward so intensely he nearly tipped his chair.
“We’ve been stuck trying to map the customer’s logic.
We never considered mapping their impulse.
Their gut feeling.” He pointed a pen at a particularly wild squiggle Leo had drawn.
“What is this? This moment of… beautiful madness?”
Leo blinked, turning from the board. The faces staring back at him were no longer bored or tense. They were lit up, energized. It felt like walking out of a black-and-white film and into glorious, mind-bending Technicolor.
“That,” Leo said, finding his voice, “is the ‘I-deserve-this’ spiral. It’s that moment you’ve had a terrible day, and you decide that not only are you going to buy the ridiculously expensive hiking boots, but you’re also going to buy the matching all-weather jacket and the thermal socks, because capitalism is a scam and you’re going to die one day anyway. ”
A ripple of laughter went through the room. It was warm, genuine laughter. For the first time since he’d set foot in this temple of tasteful gray, Leo felt like he wasn’t just an imposter. He was a participant.
“So the user’s entry point isn’t a product, it’s a mood,” Anya mused, already sketching in her notebook. “We could build a dynamic landing page that responds to that emotional state…”
“And the call to action isn’t ‘Buy Now,’ it’s ‘Treat Yourself,’” David added, his eyes wide with possibility. “Oh, the ad copy writes itself.”
The energy was infectious. Ideas flew across the table, each one building on Leo’s initial concept.
They were talking about user personas not as data points, but as people with bad days and fleeting joys.
They were using words like ‘whimsical’ and ‘serendipitous’ without irony.
And they kept looking to him, Leo, for confirmation, for the next burst of chaotic inspiration.
He found himself talking about color theory as a language of emotion, about typography that felt like a hug, about micro-interactions that were like finding a forgotten twenty-dollar bill in a coat pocket.
He was making it all up as he went along, of course. But it was different from the bluffing he’d done before. This wasn’t a lie about skills he didn’t have; it was the truth about a perspective he’d always had, just translated into a language these people could understand. The language of art.
Through it all, he was acutely aware of Julian.
His boss hadn’t moved from his spot at the head of the table.
He was silent, observing, his steepled fingers partially obscuring his mouth.
But his eyes, those intense gray eyes that had previously only ever held skepticism or outright annoyance when directed at Leo, were now fixed on him with an unnerving, analytical focus.
It wasn’t a hostile focus, though. It was something else.
Something Leo couldn’t quite name, but it made the skin on his arms tingle.
When the storm of creativity finally subsided into a workable plan, Julian cleared his throat. The room fell silent instantly, a Pavlovian response to the quiet authority he commanded.
“Alright,” Julian began, his voice calm and decisive. “This is our new direction. David, I want three mock-ups of ad copy based on the ‘emotional trigger’ concept by end of day. Anya, work with your team on a prototype for the dynamic landing page. I want to see a proof of concept by Monday.”
He went around the room, assigning tasks with his usual machine-like efficiency. Leo held his breath, waiting for his own assignment. He expected to be told to… make coffee? To provide more doodles?
Julian’s gaze finally landed on him. The focus was so direct it felt physical.
“Hayes,” he said. The use of his last name was still Julian’s default, but it sounded different now.
Less like an accusation, more like a designation.
“Effective immediately, you’re the Creative Concept Lead for the Northwind project.
Everything A-side—visuals, copy, user experience—runs through you first. I expect you to be the guardian of this…
chaos. Make sure we don’t lose the spark. ”
Leo’s brain did a thing it often did under extreme pressure: it short-circuited.
The words “Creative Concept Lead” echoed in the sudden, ringing silence of his mind.
It sounded important. It sounded real. It sounded like something that should belong to a person who knew what the hell they were doing.
A person who wasn’t one badly-timed technical question away from being exposed as a fraud who thought ‘backend integration’ was a type of spinal surgery.
He must have been silent for too long, because a small smirk, a tiny, almost imperceptible quirk of his lips, appeared on Julian’s face. “Is that a problem?”
Leo’s mouth opened. “No,” he managed, the word coming out as a squeak. He cleared his throat. “No, sir. No problem. Guardian of chaos. Got it.”
Guardian of Chaos. It sounded like a title for a mid-level boss in a video game. Leo decided he would have it printed on a mug immediately.
“Creative. Concept. Lead,” Maya said, drawing out each word as she placed a celebratory beer in front of him. They were at The Gilded Ferret, a cozy pub in Starling Grove that felt a world away from the chrome and glass of V&S. Its warm, cluttered interior was much more Leo’s speed.
“Stop saying it like that,” Leo groaned, burying his face in his hands. “You’re going to jinx it. I’m going to walk in tomorrow and they’ll tell me it was all a fever dream induced by a gas leak in the server room.”
“No way,” Maya insisted, sliding into the booth opposite him. Her eyes were bright with genuine excitement for him. “I heard David talking about it. He called you a ‘disruptive visionary.’ I think he’s in love with you.”
“David is in love with any idea that lets him use the word ‘synergy’,” Leo retorted, though he couldn’t suppress a smile.
He took a long sip of his beer. The euphoria was still bubbling under his skin, a fizzy, golden feeling he hadn’t felt…
well, ever. He wasn’t just faking it anymore.
He was making it. For a single, glorious moment on that whiteboard, he had been completely himself, and it had been enough. More than enough.
“I’m just saying, this is huge,” Maya continued, her voice softer now. “Julian Thorne does not hand out titles like that. He barely hands out compliments. To have him put you in charge of the creative side of his biggest project? Leo, that’s not just a job. That’s a coronation.”
Leo felt a flush of pride so intense it was almost painful. Julian’s approval. He hadn’t realized how much he’d craved it until it was his. The memory of Julian’s focused gaze, the quiet weight of his validation, was more intoxicating than any beer.
“I just have to actually do it now,” Leo said, the bubble of euphoria deflating slightly with a prick of anxiety. “I have to lead.”
“You’ll be amazing. You just have to keep doing what you did today.”
“What, have a panic-induced artistic seizure in front of the whole team?”
“Exactly!” she laughed. “Look, all you have to do is protect the big idea. You’re the vibes guy. You just need to make sure the final product has the right… user-centric paradigm?”
Leo winced. The jargon. The ever-present, terrifying jargon.
He’d almost stumbled during the brainstorm, had nearly suggested they “triangulate the aesthetic frameworks” before realizing he had absolutely no idea what that meant.
It was a phrase he’d overheard Anya say once, and his brain, the traitorous sponge that it was, had filed it away under ‘Things Smart People Say.’ It was a close call, a tiny stumble on the tightrope he was walking.
“Right. The paradigm,” he said, trying to sound casual. The lie felt heavy again, a cold stone in his gut amidst the warm fizz of victory. He was the Creative Concept Lead, a guardian of chaos built on a foundation of meticulously constructed bullshit.
Maya seemed to sense his shift in mood. “Hey,” she said, her expression serious. “You earned this. Don’t let that stupid imposter syndrome get to you.”
Oh, honey, Leo thought, a fresh wave of self-deprecating humor washing over him. If you only knew. It’s not imposter syndrome if you’re an actual imposter.
He pushed the thought away, forcing a grin. For tonight, he wouldn’t think about the fragile house of cards his career was built on. He wouldn’t think about the fact that he was falling, just a little, for the one man who would be most furious when it all came crashing down.
For tonight, he was the Creative Concept Lead. And he was going to order another beer.