Chapter Twelve
Ophelia remembered this cottage.
It was the same cottage where she had confessed her pregnancy to Creston, where he’d made the decision to marry her anyway. It was such a cold, dirty cave of a hovel, but it was his, and it had a special memory for her, life-changing as it had been.
Now she was standing there with five women she didn’t know, but five women who were quite serious about helping her prepare the cottage for her newlywed life.
Standing at the rear door of the cottage, they evidently already had a small army of servants waiting to help, because Elisiana opened the door, and people with buckets and brushes, chairs and fabric began to pour through.
As Ophelia stood by the hearth, rather flabbergasted, the gang went to work.
Under Elisiana’s supervision, floors and walls were scrubbed and dusted of cobwebs.
Astria was in charge of furniture, so she was standing by the back door, calling to servants to bring things in or take things out.
Gisele had charge of what were to be curtains on the windows, while Athdara was in charge of the second floor.
She made sure beds were assembled and mattresses were stuffed.
There was even a small alcove on that level for dressing or bathing, so she had basins put in that small room as well as a dented copper pot that could be used for bathing.
It wasn’t exactly a tub, but one could sit in it, legs folded, and bathe.
It was more than Ophelia could have asked for.
“I feel rather useless,” she said as she stood in the master chamber, watching Athdara direct servants to stuff the mattress with straw and moss, which made it very soft. “You all are doing so much for my home. Is there something I can do to help?”
Athdara smiled. “You are not supposed to help, Lady de Royans,” she said. “This is our wedding gift to you. You are supposed to stand by and enjoy it.”
Ophelia grinned, looking around to see that her bags from The Black Cock had somehow made it to Creston’s cottage.
She went over to them and knelt down, unstrapping the satchel and opening the mouth of it to get to the items inside.
She looked around for a wardrobe, but didn’t see one in the chamber.
“I can leave my clothing in these bags, but is there a chest I should use for them?” she said. “I have not seen one, but this has been quite a day. I may have simply missed it somehow.”
Athdara held up a hand, begging for patience, as she scooted over to the bedroom door and shouted down the stairwell.
“Are you bringing the wardrobe?” she called.
There was a muffled reply that Ophelia couldn’t quite hear, but after a few moments, she could hear movement on the stairs.
Athdara stood back, and male servants carrying an enormous wardrobe appeared.
She directed them to put it against one of the walls, and as the servants left to grab the next piece of furniture, Ophelia went to the wardrobe and ran her hand over it in awe.
“It is beautiful,” she said. “But I am not certain I can allow you to give me such an expensive piece. You are so kind to do it, but…”
Athdara came up beside her with a damp rag and began running it over the wood. It was old, but serviceable, and elaborately carved. A very expensive piece, as Ophelia had noted. But Athdara simply shook her head as she wiped it off.
“I did not buy it,” she said. “It was in a barn we use to store things like this.”
Ophelia’s brow furrowed. “Furniture?”
“And other things,” Athdara said. “You see, this village, long ago, housed people who were not from Blackchurch. It was back during the time when the first Lord Exmoor took possession of Exford Castle. Have you seen it yet?”
Ophelia shook her head. “Nay,” she said. “I’ve not been anywhere on the grounds other than the gatehouse and this cottage.”
Athdara stopped dusting and gestured toward the window, to what lay beyond it.
“It is a vast place,” she said. “Exford Castle keep is in the middle of it, near the old, burned-out church ruins. The blackened church, hence the name ‘Blackchurch.’ But as I was saying, the village the trainers live in used to be a village of farmers and merchants, but over the years, Blackchurch simply took it over to house their own people. Items were left behind in the cottages, like wardrobes and chairs and things like that, and they are all kept stored in an old barn. Therefore, I did not buy this wardrobe—I simply had it brought over, along with everything else, to furnish your home. If you do not like it, that is well and good, but it will serve a purpose until you can purchase something else.”
That explained a great deal about Blackchurch and the way the trainers lived. Ophelia ran her hand over the carved door.
“I will keep it, if I may,” she said. “It is very beautiful. And you have done so much for me. I am very grateful.”
Athdara smiled as she returned to her cleaning.
“We want to make your life here a good one,” she said.
“All of us, the wives, know how difficult it is to become part of the Blackchurch brotherhood. It is a very tight community of men who would kill or die for any of us. They are honorable, worthy men, your husband included. We want you to feel welcome.”
It was a kind thing to say. Athdara and the other women were going out of their way to make Ophelia feel accepted, but in the back of her mind, she was starting to view them like she viewed Creston—people she didn’t know, but people she wanted to know.
She wanted to have friends here. She wanted to be accepted.
But right now, her relationship with them was built on a lie.
They knew about her failed marriage from a couple of months earlier. She’d been honest about that.
But they didn’t know everything.
Perhaps if they did, they’d simply walk out and leave her to do the rest of the preparation for her cottage. They were helping her make it a livable home, but that was based on what they presumed—that she was an innocent woman who did not come into the marriage by deception.
But they were wrong. If there was any hope of having a true friendship with them, it couldn’t be built on a misconception.
“Wait,” she finally said, putting her hand over Athdara’s as the woman dusted off the base of the wardrobe. “Would… it be possible to speak with you before you continue?”
Athdara looked at her curiously. “Of course,” she said. “What do you wish to speak about? Of course! You do not like this wardrobe.”
“Nay, that is not it at all.”
“You want something smaller? This is rather large. I think there are smaller ones.”
“Nay, truly,” Ophelia insisted. “This wardrobe is lovely. It is something else I must speak of. Would it be too rude of me to ask the other women to join us? I should like to speak with all of you, if I may.”
Athdara could see that something was on Ophelia’s mind, so she nodded and went to the doorway again.
There were servants scrubbing the stairs and she sent one of them to fetch Gisele, Elisiana, and Astria.
In little time, the women joined them, entering the big chamber and voicing their approval over such a beautiful wardrobe.
They thought that might be the reason they’d been summoned, but Ophelia quietly shut the door before turning to them.
Her manner was timid, but determined.
Truthfully, she’d never felt so anxious in her life.
“Firstly, I wanted to thank you all for being so generous with your time and talent,” she said.
“I know that you are not finished yet, but I feel that it is important I tell you something before you continue. You may feel differently about helping me once I’ve told you, so I do not want you to think I’ve taken advantage of your kindness. I would never do that.”
So far, no one seemed concerned by her statement. In fact, they were all smiling to varying degrees.
“What is it?” Athdara asked.
That question only made Ophelia feel more nervous. She was positive they were all going to stop talking to her and walk out, but she had no choice.
“I was honest with you when I told you that I was betrothed to another man a couple of months ago,” she said.
“A man I thought I could change. I thought that marriage and a family would make him grateful to be a husband and I would have my perfect life. You see, I loved him and never thought he would abandon me. Or mayhap I did, but I would not entertain the thought. I pretended it was not a possibility. But it was. Since we were betrothed, we behaved as married people do, in every sense of the word. When he abandoned me, he abandoned a pregnant woman. I am with child.”
The smiles were gone from the faces of the women around her.
She could hardly lift her head to look at them, but she could see enough.
She could see that they were looking at her, but she couldn’t really interpret their expressions.
No one said anything for a moment, which made her feel like vomiting.
She’d never been so ashamed, or so anxious, in her life.
“Creston knows,” she whispered tightly, feeling tears of shame sting her eyes.
“It was my grandfather’s idea to marry me to a man very quickly so he might think I carried his child, even if that child was to be born early, but I could not let him do that to Creston.
I told him before we were married, to give him time to break the betrothal, but he chose not to. ”
It was Athdara who spoke first. “I thought this marriage seemed to happen quickly,” she said. “Now it makes sense.”
The tears were starting to leak from Ophelia’s eyes and she wiped them quickly.
“Now that you know, I am certain you do not wish to waste your time on me, and I completely understand,” she said.
“I just thought you should know, so there were no secrets between us if we were to be friends. Moreover, in a month or two, you would figure out that my pregnancy was more advanced than it would have been had I conceived on our wedding night or shortly thereafter. I would not insult you by lying to you about it. I believe in honesty, even if it is destructive. It is better than living a lie.”
She still had her head down and couldn’t see the wives looking at one another. It was Gisele who finally shrugged.
“This chamber needs a table,” she said, gesturing toward the window. “Some place where you can sit with Creston and share a conversation or a morning meal. Athdara, are there any small tables left in that barn?”
The women started talking about tables, and Ophelia’s head shot up. She looked at them as if they’d all just lost their minds.
“But… wait,” she said, stopping their conversation. “Did you not hear what I said?”
“We heard,” Gisele said, her dark eyes glimmering.
“You loved a man and were supposed to marry him. You conceived a child. The shame is on him for walking out on you, my lady. You did nothing wrong. Had you not told Creston, I might have something else to say about it, but you did. He knows. I see no issue with this.”
Ophelia’s eyes were wide. “You don’t?”
“Nay,” Gisele said as she reached out to grasp Ophelia’s hand.
“Years ago, I, too, conceived the child of a man I thought I would marry. The child was born out of wedlock because I did not marry my son’s father for about ten years, so I am in no position to cast judgment.
None of us are. We all have a past, my lady.
Yours is no more shameful than anyone else’s, so please put your mind at ease.
But thank you for telling us. You have given us your trust and we will strive to be worthy of it. ”
That brought tears again, this time of gratitude. “I do not know how to thank you,” Ophelia said. “This has been something I’ve been punished over, by my grandfather, and I’ve simply learn to associate it with shame.”
“There is no shame with us. We understand.”
Impulsively, Ophelia hugged Gisele as she burst into quiet tears.
Gisele laughed softly, hugging Ophelia until she could reclaim her composure.
When she did, or was at least trying to, Athdara hugged her too, followed by Elisiana and Astria.
As Gisele had said, they all had a past to a certain extent.
No one was without some shame in their lives.
Perhaps Ophelia’s had been a sin of some caliber, but no one was going to judge her for it.
She’d been honest about it and that was all that mattered.
It was a moment of acceptance for the wives of Blackchurch.
Another lady of honor had come into their fold.
“Come, now,” Athdara said. “We must hurry. We told Creston an hour and it has been almost that already, so we must quickly finish everything.”
Astria and Elisiana broke for the door. “I am almost finished,” Astria said, bashing into Elisiana as they both tried to get through the door at the same time. “Lisi, move!”
They laughed all the way down the stairwell, followed by Gisele. “Athdara?” she said. “Do you want me to send a servant for a table for this chamber? It is big enough. It could use one.”
“Aye,” Athdara said. “And a trunk or a chest. See if there are any in the old barn.”
Gisele winked at Ophelia and fled, leaving the remaining two women to sort out the master chamber before Creston arrived.
“Linens,” Athdara suddenly said. “We need linens!”
With that, she rushed out. Ophelia watched her go, thinking of the women who had just left the chamber, women who had surprised her with their acceptance of something most noblewomen would not accept. She hadn’t expected that kindness, and it truly touched her.
Perhaps she had found a place where she would, indeed, belong.
The sprout of hope that had started when she married Creston began to grow. In this mysterious guild that men spoke of in hushed tones, it was possible that she would actually find a place where she belonged.
With renewed vigor, she went to hang up her clothing.