CHAPTER EIGHTEEN LUCY
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
LUCY
“What is this?”
I tilt my head, glancing at the reusable grocery bag in Theo’s hand. He leans against the doorway of the trainer’s room, as if he’s afraid he’ll spontaneously combust if he walks inside. Jesus, he looks good in a T-shirt and shorts with his dark hair tousled and messy like it is.
“It’s for you,” he says, a smile breaking out across his face.
I instinctively wrap my hand around my swollen stomach as I walk over to the door. I’m almost eighteen weeks now and it’s borderline depressing that I don’t even look pregnant yet. It’s that weird limbo where nothing fits right and I look like I’m extremely bloated.
Talk about a stage that truly distorts your body image.
I haven’t had any pregnancy symptoms to complain about other than my boobs hurting. So far, it’s been pretty tolerable. I’ve been feeling much better since making a conscious effort to eat, thanks to Theo.
My fingers brush Theo’s as I take the bag from him. His nostrils flare, but his eyes don’t meet mine. After toeing the line we swore we’d never cross a few times now, I swear he’s keeping as much distance from me as possible.
I’ve been living in his house for two weeks now and in a way, I feel like I’m miles away from him. He’s either been on the ice, doing things with his teammates, cooking for me, drawing or going to bed early. It’s like he’s doing anything he possibly can do to stay busy… and away from me.
The bag is in my hands and I open it, peering inside. My chest tightens while my heart simultaneously swells. It’s a bag packed full of all my favorite snacks.
My eyes lift to his. “This is too much.”
He chuckles, the sound a perfect melody against my eardrums. “You said on the road was hard, so this should be enough to get you through a few days. When you run out, I’ll restock it.”
“You didn’t have to do this.”
He arches a brow. “Yes, I did, Lucy. Someone has to make sure you’re eating enough.
” He switches gears, pushing off the doorway.
“It’s Jackson’s birthday, so the guys want to get drinks at the hotel bar tonight.
” He shifts his weight. “Do you want to come too? Not for drinks, but I don’t know—if you wanted to hang out? ”
A smirk tugs on the corners of my lips. “Are you nervous, Theodore Simmons?”
He chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck. “No way.” He shakes his head. “I don’t know what that was. Pregame jitters.”
Warmth spreads through my torso, tingling down the length of my spine. “You’d better go shake them out.”
What the hell, Lucy?
I resist the urge to smack my forehead with my palm. What a stupid response, but something weird has been happening to me recently. It’s almost as if my brain doesn’t know how to work around him. Like I’m second-guessing everything I’m doing. Like I’m nervous under his wandering eyes.
It must be pregnancy brain or whatever it’s called.
My stomach flutters and I instinctively grab my belly. “Oh.” That was a strange feeling. It happens again, almost as if my stomach is jiggling. There’s a weird pressure, like it’s shifting to the side and there’s the faintest bump against my hand. “Oh my god.” My gaze flashes to Theo’s.
The color drains from his face. “What’s wrong, love?” He immediately closes the space between us as he steps in front of me.
My heart stumbles over itself.
Love?
“The baby.” I let out a ragged breath, reaching for his hand and holding it against my stomach. I stare back at him, a smile drifting across my lips. “I felt the baby kick.”
“No fucking way,” he breathes, his eyes searching mine. He cradles my belly with my hand over his. “The pregnancy app said feeling the baby kick externally probably won’t happen for a few more weeks.”
He’s right. I remember reading that too. Heat warms my cheeks. “Sorry, I just got excited about it.”
His hands are still cradling my stomach, his gaze still locked on mine, his expression unreadable. “Don’t ever apologize for wanting to share something with me, Lucy.”
Everything around us seemingly fades away. It’s just Theo and I, my hands on his, and the child growing inside me.
Pretending almost feels real sometimes.
I wish we didn’t have to pretend it was his.
My heart skips a beat as the thought flashes in my mind. That’s a thought I can’t entertain.
“I should get back to work,” I say, my voice barely audible as I break through the silence. I lift my chin, looking up at his face, tracing his sharp jawline and his perfectly straight nose.
His gaze lingers on my stomach before flicking back to mine. “Yeah…” he agrees, his voice trailing off as his hands fall away. He takes a step back, his eyes still on mine.
“Good luck tonight.”
“I have all the luck I could ever need.” The corners of his lips twitch. He backs away, pausing in the doorway. “I’ll see you after, Freckles.”
My heart stumbles over itself. “See you later.”
He chuckles again as he spins on his heel and slips out into the hall. I slowly ease down onto the stool by the counter, eyeing the bag of snacks he brought for me. Such a small act of kindness, yet it means more to me than words could ever touch.
He means more to me than he’ll ever know…
I’m exhausted when we get back to the hotel, but I can’t say no when Theo asks me if I want to come hang out with them for a bit. His eyes are soft and tender, full of hope as he stares back at me. I slip my hand into his, letting him lead me to the bar where everyone’s sitting.
Theo pulls out a chair for me at the bar and I slide into it. Jackson, the birthday boy and brick wall of a goalie, sits three barstools down from me. “Happy birthday, Jackson.” I smile at him as he glances around Cross and Shaw at us.
“Thanks, Lucy.” He smiles, nodding his head.
Theo sits down next to me, his right hand immediately finding my thigh under the counter. My stomach flutters, except this time it isn’t from the baby. It’s from the damn butterflies my best friend gives me.
I glance at him from the corner of my eye, but he doesn’t look at me—like what he’s doing is completely normal. “Theo.”
“Shh.” He shushes me, his voice a whisper. “We’re pretending, remember?”
I swallow hard, nodding as my heart skips a beat. My hand slides over his and I thread my fingers through the spaces between his. He inhales sharply and his thumb moves, stroking the outside of my hand.
“How have you been feeling, Lucy?” Cross asks after everyone orders drinks. I get a mocktail and Theo orders the same thing.
“Not bad,” I admit, shrugging as I turn my body to look at him. Theo’s hand hasn’t moved and his thumb absentmindedly strokes my thigh. “I don’t feel as tired all the time or like my body was hit by a tractor trailer.”
“That doesn’t sound fun,” Shaw chimes in.
“Some women have it worse. I’m just glad I haven’t had any morning sickness so far.”
“My sister-in-law was really sick when she was pregnant,” Cross says. “I’m glad to hear you’re not.”
“Thanks.” I smile at him and Theo gently squeezes my thigh as the bartender comes over with everyone’s drinks.
“Are you guys having a gender reveal party?” Shaw asks and Matty, who’s on the other side of Jackson, shakes his head and snorts. “What?” Shaw narrows his eyes on him. “I’m curious.”
I glance at Theo who lifts his shoulders. “I don’t think so,” I admit. This pregnancy has been a shock and a whirlwind. I haven’t given the extras much thought, other than a baby shower. Elena and my mom both insisted they have that covered. “We didn’t really talk about it.”
“We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do,” Theo assures me, his voice soft and his eyes warm.
“I’d rather we find out during the anatomy scan,” I say quietly, my eyes searching his. “Just us.”
Theo smiles with his eyes, the warmth of his palm branding my thigh. “Just us.”
“Have you felt the baby kick yet?” Matty leans onto the bar, his voice carrying down to us.
Theo’s gaze lingers on mine for a moment longer. “Lucy felt it before our game and put my hand on her stomach, but I couldn’t feel anything. It’s too early, I think.”
“That baby’s gotta be good luck,” Shaw chimes in.
“Maybe it’s Lucy’s belly,” Jackson adds.
“Holy shit.” Matty tilts his head. “You said it was right before the game?”
Theo’s brow furrows and he nods, looking at each of his friends. “Yeah?”
Shaw’s face lights up and he glances at Jackson and then at Cross.
Matty nods. “That has to be the good luck charm.”
Shaw takes a sip of his drink. “We all need to touch her belly before the next game to test it.” He glances at me. Theo’s thumb stops on my thigh. “If you consent to it.”
“Yeah, we’re not going to touch your stomach if you don’t want us to,” Cross adds and Matty bobs his head again.
Theo sets his drink down and the glass clatters on the wood. “Alright, enough.” Theo’s tone is deadly and his gaze is dark as he glares at his friends. “No one needs to touch her except for me.”
Oh. Heat immediately pools in the pit of my stomach and my heart pounds harder. That was hot.
Theo looks at each of them. “Got it?”
One by one, they all nod, shifting their eyes away from the two of us as if they’re dogs tucking their tails on their way to the doghouse.
Theo’s chest deflates as he lets out a long, exaggerated sigh. He glances at me, his expression unreadable. “Sorry.”
I shouldn’t say it, but I can’t help it. The heat in my stomach—it’s something dangerous. I lean closer to him. His warmth radiates against the front of my chest. “Don’t be sorry.” The apex of my thighs tingles and I press my legs together, desperate for any kind of friction. “I kinda liked it.”
His eyes flick to mine. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.” I pull my bottom lip between my teeth. “I—” Shit. Don’t say it, Lucy, you horny bitch. “It was hot.”
His gaze is hooded and a flame flickers to life in his irises. “Don’t say that, Freckles,” he rasps and a shiver slides down my spine. He grabs his drink and swallows half of it in one gulp.
“Why?”
He leans in close, his lips brushing against my ear. “Because I might end up doing something we’ll both regret.”
“I don’t believe that.”
He doesn’t move. “Which?”
“Both.” I swallow hard. What the hell am I doing? I’m playing with fire… And we’re both going to get burnt. “I don’t think you’ll end up doing anything. And I don’t think either of us would regret it.”
“Fuck, Lucy,” he growls, pressing his temple against mine. “I promised you I’d never do anything that could ruin our friendship. That meant crossing a line like this.”
I pull back, his gaze burning into mine as the fire spills into my veins, spreading through my body. “Fuck your promise, Theo.”
His nostrils flare. “Yeah?” He pulls out his wallet, grabbing a fifty from inside and tossing it onto the bar. “I think we’re gonna call it a night. See you all in the morning.”
A few of the guys snicker and say goodnight as Theo pushes back his stool and rises to his feet. “What are you doing?” I mumble under my breath to him as he pulls my chair away from the bar.
He lifts me to my feet, his lips brushing against my ear. “Proving you wrong.”