4. Chapter Four ~ Emma
Chapter Four ~ Emma
I must have heard him wrong.
A lot of things sound like ‘I want you to have my baby.’ Right?
My mouth drops open in shock as I gape at him but he’s just standing there, staring back at me. As if he’s waiting for me to just say yes and accept his offer.
“You want … what?”
“I want you to have my baby.”
When he repeats it there’s no mistaking the words. But he’s got to be joking, right?
My thoughts immediately drift to just what it would take to have a baby with this man … bodies entwined together in bed. His arms wrapped around me. That mouth on my breasts … or lower …
Quickly I shake my head and try to focus on what’s going on in front of me.
I seriously misjudged him if this is the kind of thing that he finds enticing. I thought he was a playboy. A flirt. The kind who wanted to just have fun and live life. But, he wants kids? Does he have other kids?
And why me? When he can have any chick he wants, why does he want me up here with him every day? Why does he want me to be the one to have his baby?
But as my mind is whirling, trying to make sense of it I realize he’s still talking and I try to tune back in.
“I need a baby to carry on my family legacy.” So that’s a ‘no’ on ‘does he have other kids.’ “And I think that you would be a good one to have that baby. In exchange, I’ll take care of you. And the baby, of course.”
‘Take care of.’ What does that mean exactly? I can only stare at him, though questions are flashing through my head at warp speed. I’m not able to voice any of them. My mouth simply won’t comply with what my brain wants. Though, to be honest, my brain isn’t quite sure what it wants either.
“We’ll have a contract in place. You will carry my baby. And I will give you a place to stay from the time the contract is signed until … well, until whenever you may choose to leave. But if you choose to leave, the baby remains with me.”
A place to stay. That would help my financial situation already. I’d be able to give Mom and Leann the money I’m currently paying for rent. But it’s not as much as I would have hoped. And if I’m going to be taking care of a baby …
“And of course there will be an allowance involved. A generous one that will take care of your family and you. And the baby will receive everything that it needs as well.”
An allowance. A place to stay. All of this is sounding better and better. More and more like something that could make a huge difference for my family. For Leann. We could pay for the medical appointments. Get her the dialysis if she needs it. But having a baby … is that really something that I’m prepared to do?
“I … it’s … it’s a lot to think about,” I say finally. And he inclines his head slightly, appraising me.
Is this really happening?
Of course every girl dreams of a proposal and being treated like a princess but that’s not really what this is.
A contract?
A baby for the sole purpose of carrying on his legacy and his name?
It’s all crazy.
And I’m crazy for even considering it.
But then again … there is the money.
My gaze runs over his body and I feel my own heat in response.
And the sex.
“The choice is yours, Emma, whether you wish to accept.”
“My job-“
“Your job will be here no matter what.” His tone is flippant, like that doesn’t even matter to him. “Should you choose to refuse my offer, you can remain a cocktail waitress as long as you like. But I will not allow you to be a dancer in my club.”
I can stay. Keep things as they are. Or I can accept his offer.
Still, my mind is racing.
This is crazy. The very idea that I’m even considering it is crazy. I should be running out of here and telling him how insane he is. I should be getting myself committed for even entertaining the idea but I can’t help but wonder.
I never really thought about having kids of my own. Oh sure, when I was younger it was something I considered but not since then. Not when the reality of our financial situation really struck me. There’s no way I could bring a kid into my mess. But now, it’s a possibility.
A child of my own and all the extra benefits that go along with it …
“I need … I need time to think,” I say finally and he nods again.
“Take all the time you need.” With that he strolls around his desk and sinks into his own chair, effectively dismissing me as he returns to the papers that he was no doubt working on when he heard me next door.
Slowly I manage to get up from my own chair and make my way to the door. There is a long pause while I stand there and think again about what just happened and the type of proposition that he just made. But then I continue on. I’m actually off today. I came in just to talk with Ethan. But that’s good for me because it means that I can leave the club and take a walk down to the park.
It’s my favorite place to sit and think. There’s a bench at the back that looks out over the water. It’s beautiful. No matter the time of year, that bench and that part of the lake is always peaceful and just relaxing.
Though right now isn’t the time for relaxing. Right now I’m struggling to piece together everything that’s happening in my life and what this could mean.
Chris is rich. Extremely rich. So when he says that he would give me a generous allowance to take care of my family and myself, it’s likely that the allowance would be quite large. Much larger than what I would consider to be reasonable.
And I would have a place to stay, which means no more paying rent. So that’s even more money that can be put toward taking care of Leann and Mom. Maybe there would even be enough money for them to go on a vacation. None of us have had one since Dad …
But am I willing to give up everything that I would need to in order to make it happen?
My freedom? Because even if he doesn’t make demands on me once the baby is here, there would be a baby that needed me.
But also, this might be my one chance to have a baby. And not have to worry about whether they would be okay.
Sure, if I were going to have a baby in an ideal world I would want it to be with someone I love. And I would want them to be a whole partner in the experience. But this isn’t an ideal world. This is the real world. And that doesn’t happen very often.
I sigh but finally head back to my own place for the night, heating up a box of mac and cheese and sitting on the sofa that’s only a slight step up from the one at my mom’s house. I look around at the miniscule studio apartment that I can afford with my salary.
I could change everything … for all of us … so why hold back?
The next morning I prepare for my shift a little more carefully, taking great pains to look my absolute best. It’s been hours. A full night. And I don’t know if he’s still going to be in the same mood he was yesterday. If he’s still going to want the same things he did yesterday. But just in case … I want to be prepared.
With a sigh I head to the club. This is it. I’ve made my decision and I’m going to stick with it. There’s no backing out now.
At least, that’s what I tell myself as I make my way up the stairs and knock on Chris’s door.
“Enter.” That firm voice sends a chill down my spine that’s part heat at the memory of everything we’ve already shared and part fear of just what’s to come. But I open the door and force myself to walk steadily over to the desk. “Emma. Have you made your decision?”
“I … I accept your offer. I will have your baby.”