Chapter Six
By Tuesday, Myles knew he loved being a dad. He and Zack had spent Monday going to the park in the morning. He fixed them both peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch and read him a story before his nap. That afternoon, they played at the park again. The more time they spent together, the more Myles knew he was doing the right thing in connecting with his son. What would it be like to be with him until he grew up? To have a part in molding him to manhood?
He looked forward to the evening when Anna returned home. Together, they’d prepared dinner. The meal proved lively. Zack hopped from one topic to another. Laughter was common. Myles enjoyed watching Anna when she talked. Her eyes didn’t hold as much sadness as he’d once seen. Her laughter was light and delightful. He did his best to keep it going.
And after Zack was in bed, the two adults had a time to talk. Edith was on the mend. She told Anna she’d be ready to watch Zack again in a day or two. Which meant only a couple of more days alone with his son.
His scheduled trip to the U.N. to see where Anna worked was postponed while he watched Zack. But he’d reschedule when things were back to normal. He wanted to see her in her workplace, see who she worked with, what her friends were like.
He had the Wednesday meeting at the school to attend, which would give him more insight into her life. Once he worried he couldn’t fit in with her and Zack, but now he was willing to try.
Tuesday, while Zack napped, Myles attempted to read. But his gaze was drawn again and again to the many photographs of Tom Tucker that were scattered around the living room. He’d also noted an enlargement of one by Zack’s bed. Were they there for Zack’s sake, or Anna’s? Myles wasn’t sure.
He was drawn to Anna, and she seemed receptive to his kisses. Yet last weekend, she’d clearly stated she wasn’t ready to move on. It was obvious from the pictures that the three of them had been a very happy family. Wistfully, Myles wondered if he’d ever find that kind of happiness.
It was too soon to suggest to Anna that she consider marrying him. He’d only known her a couple of weeks. Yet the rightness wouldn’t go away. It all depended upon Anna.
Anna unlocked the door, excited to see the two males in her life.
Myles had been a tremendous help these two days. Zack had adored having Myles watch him. That morning he’d gone to preschool and Myles had called to check in with her in the afternoon and told her he’d felt like an elephant in a china shop, but had persevered, running the gauntlet of mothers. She laughed at his comments.
The best time of the day was after she returned home. Being with Myles reminded her of the evenings she and Tom had shared. Preparing dinner together, talking about their days. But the aching sense of loss she’d experienced for the last year was easing.
Being with Myles brought out the best of being a couple, with none of the crushing reminders of her husband.
“Mommy.” Zack raced down the hall to greet her, flinging his arms around her legs as high as he could reach.
“Hey, sweet thing, how are you?”
Anna picked him up to hug, her eyes going to the tall man following him at a more sedate pace.
“Myles and me went to the park.”
“I know. He told me he was taking you there.”
Sharing the look with Myles felt right. When he was close enough, he leaned in and kissed her, then looked at Zack, still in his mother’s arms.
“Did you kiss Mommy?” Myles asked.
Zack kissed her, then smiled at Myles.
He struggled to get down, then ran back toward his room.
“I got a car. Wait till you see it,” he said.
Anna put her purse on the small table and took off her light jacket. “You bought him another toy? Honestly, where is he going to put them all?”
“Hey, a ball, a kite and a battery powered car are hardly going to force you to live elsewhere. Besides, I have as much fun with them as he does.”
“I know, two boys at heart.”
He pulled her into his arms and gave her a proper kiss.
“I may be a boy at heart, but around you, I feel all man,” he said a moment later.
Zack returned with his new car before Anna could respond. She admired his ability to drive the car, though it crashed into the wall a time or two.
Then she said, “I need to change clothes. Then who wants to help me with dinner?”
“Me and Myles. Me and Myles,” Zack shouted.
Anna laughed. But as she walked toward her room, she wondered how her son was going to react when, in a couple of months, Myles returned to work?
Would he keep in touch? She hoped so. She couldn’t imagine never seeing him again.
Once in casual clothes, she hurried out to the kitchen to start dinner.
Once Zack had been put to bed and it was just the two of them, Anna became quiet. She was getting too used to this arrangement. Zack wasn’t the only one who was going to miss Myles when he wasn’t around.
“How about showing me those pictures of Zack when he was younger?” Myles suggested when she walked into the living room.
“A great idea to a mother, but you’ll be bored after a while.”
“I doubt it,” he said.
He’d wanted to see the early pictures for days. He yearned to know all he could about Zack, from if he’d been a fussy baby to when he took his first steps. Surely Anna would enjoy sharing that.
She went to the bookcase and pulled out two bulging albums and carried them to the sofa.
Opening the first, she caught her breath as the memory hit. It showed her holding a bundled up Zack in front of the building where they all used to live. She remembered Tom had wanted to have a picture of Zack’s first home in case they moved later. Neither suspected Anna and Zack would move without Tom.
“He’s about a week old here,” she said, pointing to the picture.
Slowly, she gave a brief comment on each picture as they leafed through the album. To Myles’s delight, she noted memorial events. Here was the photo of Zack’s first tooth. Looked like a lot of gum to Myles, but Anna assured him that tiny speck on the lower gum was a tooth that had just broken through.
She had several of him standing, looking astonished.
“Here’s when he took his first step. These are just still shots. I can show you the video on my phone.”
The little boy had been by the sofa, moving toward the camera. The video showed the tottering steps and the crash landing on his diapered bottom. It touched Myles’ heart. He wished he’d been there to celebrate the milestone.
There were also locks of hair and hand prints and footprints from his one-month checkup, notations of his height and weight at each doctor’s visit.
Myles studied each photograph, asking her questions through all the pictures. Slowly, they moved through almost four years’ worth of photos in the two albums. There was a gap when Zack first turned three, when Tom had died. It had been weeks before Anna had felt up to taking pictures and was able to do so without tears blurring her vision.
The memories were bittersweet, but she went through both albums with Myles. It was her life with Zack recorded, even though Tom was now gone. She was glad she had all the pictures she did of Tom with Zack.
“My goodness, it’s after ten. You weren’t bored, were you?” she asked when she closed the second album.
“Not at all. You’re doing a good job raising him. It can’t be easy as a solo parent. I know he’s run me ragged these two days.”
She put the book on the coffee table and leaned back against the cushions.
“Sometimes I wonder how I can do it. Other times I wouldn’t change a thing. He’s the light of my life.”
“Did you ever want more children?”
“Tom and I talked about having three, but it wasn’t to be. How about you? How many kids do you want?”
“I never planned on getting married. That might change, however.” Myles looked at her. “Would you go out with me Saturday night—to dinner? Maybe dancing if I can find a place. Just you and me.”
Anna felt her heart rate increase. This would be a date. No camouflaging it with a little boy as a buffer. No confusing the issue by saying they were just going on a picnic as new acquaintances or bumping into each other at the park.
An honest-to-goodness date.
“Yes, I’d like to,” she replied.
Then a wave of panic doused her. What was she thinking? She glanced at the nearest picture of Tom.
“I hate that,” Myles said.
She looked at him. “What?”
“You look at his picture all the time. As if asking permission, or forgiveness for moving on. How long are you going to depend on a dead man? How long are you going to live in the past? He sounds like he was a wonderful person who loved you a lot. But he’s gone, never to come back. I wish you would acknowledge that and move on.”
Anna felt as if he’d slapped her.
“I don’t depend on a dead man, as you so crudely put it. He was my husband. I loved him dearly. I miss him.”
She jumped up and crossed to the window, staring out into the darkness. How dare Myles say she was stuck in the past.
“I know that makes you angry. But look at it from my point of view. Every time I kiss you, I feel he’s right there in the middle of us. I want to treat you like a woman, yet I feel we have a chaperon in our midst. I know he was a good man. A loving husband and father. But he’s gone and you’re not. You need to make a new life for yourself, not live in some kind of time lock.”
“I know that. He was my husband. Am I supposed to forget he existed? I have made a new life. I have a job, a new apartment. I’m doing the best I can. Maybe if you’d ever been deeply in love and lost, you’d understand. But you sound like you’re too afraid to form attachments. Moving around like you do makes it convenient to keep everyone at a distance. Well, I’m coping the best I can.”
“It’s been more than a year. Surely you’ve made some closure. Come to terms with it.”
“I have,” she said with dignity. Then frowned. “I think. Besides, there’s no time limit on grief. We had planned to spend our lives together.”
He rose and moved to stand beside her, not touching, but close enough to feel the warmth from her body, to smell the sweet scent she wore.
“I’m not sure how close we’ll ever become if Tom Tucker is in the middle.”
“He’s not.”
Anna realized suddenly it was taking a lot of energy to keep from looking at his picture at this moment. Was she still depending on Tom?
She really enjoyed being with Myles. She looked forward to seeing him, hearing about his day with Zack, learning about his life.
“No one can measure up to him. Especially now that he’s gone forever. No man can compete,” Myles said.
“And are you trying to compete?”
He hesitated a moment, then slowly nodded.
“Maybe.”
That surprised her. Was he really courting her? Panic flared. She wasn’t ready to be more than friends.
“I’d like to think we’re friends,” she said slowly.
“I think I’m jealous,” he admitted.
“Of a dead man?”
“It’s hard to compete with a ghost,” Myles said wryly.
“You don’t have to compete with anyone.”
She turned, stepped closer, erasing the distance between them.
“I think you are very special and I want to go with you. As long as I can get a babysitter. I don’t know if Edith will be up to it by Saturday.”
“Then we go if you can get a sitter,” he said. “I’ll head for home now. I’ll be here again in the morning.”
He stepped around her and left.
Anna spun around, astonished
He hadn’t kissed her goodnight.
Glaring at the door for a moment, she shifted her gaze to Tom’s closest picture.
She did look at them all the time. They kept her connected. But Myles was right, Tom was dead.
Her mother had said clinging to the past wouldn’t bring him back. Tears filled her eyes. Her first love was gone forever. For the millionth time, she wished she could turn back the clock. Hold on to what they had.
She yearned for his touch, his humor, his love. It vanished fourteen months ago, never to be again.
Walking over, she picked up her favorite picture and gazed into the dear face she’d never see again. She could hear the echo of his voice, his laugh. She could see the love in his eyes.
“I loved you,” she murmured. “It about killed me when you died. If I hadn’t had Zack, I don’t know how I could have coped. He’s such a great kid. You would have enjoyed watching him grow up, and would have taught him so much.”
She thought about it for a long moment, then sighed softly.
“Actually, Myles is teaching him things. How to be responsible. How to share. And a bit about families—even though he didn’t have one of his own.”
She hugged the frame against her chest. It was cold and hard.
With a deep sigh, she went slowly around the room and collected the pictures of Tom, reliving all the memories that flooded when she viewed each one. He’d forever be a part of her life.
But it was time to move on. Maybe to another chapter that could be just as happy.
When she had all the photographs in her arms, she went to the bedroom and placed them in the bottom drawer of the dresser that had been Tom’s. She’d let the one stay in Zack’s room. And the one by her bed. A child should remember his father. And she wanted to see his dear face a few more mornings when she first woke.
Feeling nostalgic and melancholy, she went to bed. Stretching out her hand, she felt the empty space beside her. Never to be filled, she’d once thought.
Now she wondered if Myles would like to pursue their relationship all the way to making love. Closing her eyes, she could almost imagine his muscular body pulling her close, his deep voice speaking to her in the night. The joy they’d share making love and sleeping together. Waking up together.
Where once she never expected to share a bed with another, now she wondered if she could imagine not eventually sharing with Myles.
Rolling on her side, she remembered his kisses, his hands caressing her. If things kept on the way they were going, would they fall for each other? Or was she just someone to fill the time with while he was on leave?
She hoped not. Myles Riker was a very special man. She closed her eyes. No one could predict the future. But she might just open herself up to whatever came—embracing every new experience.
Wednesday, Myles showed up just as Anna thought he wasn’t coming. She had to leave immediately. He’d timed it that way, she suspected. But there wasn’t enough time to challenge him on the issue. At least he’d arrived and she could get to work.
“I’ll be home in time to cook a quick dinner so we can leave for the school,” she said as she was walking out the door. She looked back. “You are still going?”
“I said I would,” he replied, his attention already on Zack.
The day seemed interminable to Anna. She couldn’t concentrate on her translations for wondering what Myles and Zack were doing. She hoped He didn’t regret offering his help. Edith had told her last night when she went to check on her that she felt up to watching Zack for the evening. It’d only be for an hour or two and he’d be going to bed at eight.
Torn between wanting to see Myles again and dreading the confrontation for the churning emotions that filled her, Anna wasn’t sure how she felt as she caught the subway for home. Walking in the door just before six, she could smell something delicious cooking.
“I’m home,” she called out.
Zack came running from the kitchen.
“Myles made dinner,” he said, his face full of wonder. “He can cook.”
Myles appeared in the doorway, looking as unlike a cook as anyone she’d ever seen. His broad shoulders almost filled the doorway. His attire was suited to a work site—jeans and a flannel shirt, unbuttoned at the throat with the sleeves rolled up. He looked rugged and handsome. She caught her breath and then smiled.
“What a treat,” she said.
“Just burgers and fries,” he said.
She didn’t correct him. If he thought she meant the food, that was fine by her.
“I’ll change and be right out.”
“Be ready in about ten. I thought I timed it about right,” he said with satisfaction.
His gaze moved over her and his eyes seemed to light up.
Feeling flustered, Anna spun around and almost ran to her bedroom. She changed quickly, seeking Tom’s photograph.
“It’s a habit. I hope you won’t mind if I break it. If I can,” she murmured.
Feeling like a soldier going off to war with no armor, she bravely went to have dinner with the most exciting man she’d known.
When they walked over to the school, he took her hand.
“I see you put away Tom’s pictures.”
“Yes.”
She couldn’t say any more. She felt as if she ripped off a Band-Aid. But it was healthy. She’d never forget him.
Now was the time to explore new options and opportunities.
He said nothing, either, but the clasp of his hand warmed her.
The meeting at the school began promptly at seven. Anna felt extremely self-conscious walking into the school’s largest room with Myles at her side. He looked completely out of his element, dwarfing the small furniture more suitable to preschoolers than the men and women who had assembled.
The meeting went well, with all parents volunteering for some tasks. There wasn’t a lot of money in the entire group, Anna thought, but they were all parents interested in providing the best for their children.
When Myles volunteered to work on the drywall in two classrooms and the playground upgrade, heads swiveled and questions were whispered as no one recognized him.
“I’m here for Zack Tucker,” he said.
Speculative glances then moved to Anna from the parents who knew her. She felt awkward. Still, she was glad Zack had someone who could be of more help than she’d be. She signed up for painting, both indoors and out. She hoped the weather would cooperate. The first work weekend was in three days. They planned to work for a month and then reassess the remaining work.
“I know most of us have busy lives and can hardly afford the school fees. But working together, we’ll pass the city’s inspection and keep the school open,” the headmistress said at the conclusion of the meeting.
“Thanks again,” Anna said to Myles as they rose in preparation to leave. “It’s probably minuscule compared to what you normally do.”
“It is, but I’ll have more direct interaction than I normally do. I’m the boss on the sites. Here I’ll get to swing a hammer.”
“Oh, fun,” she murmured.
“I want to talk to the headmistress. If she hasn’t already ordered the supplies, I might be able to help.”
They moved toward Mrs. Harper, waiting while two other parents chatted with her for a few minutes. Then it was their turn.
“I’m Myles Riker.”
“I remember seeing you when we had that scare when Zack ran off. So nice of you to volunteer to help us,” she said, extending her hand and then smiling at Anna.
“If you don’t already have your supplies, I might get them at a lower cost.”
He quickly explained what company he worked for.
“One thing the company is always looking for is community projects it can support. I think I can call one of the men in the local office and get supplies at a deep discount.”
“Oh, that would be so helpful. We’re really stretched on this. We really can’t afford these repairs, but if we don’t do them, we’ll be closed down. I can’t let that happen. The hardware store a few blocks away was giving us a ten percent discount. I thought it was the best I could do.”
“I’m sure my company will beat that. I’ll make some calls in the morning and then let you know.”
She smiled and nodded, turning to Anna.
“I’m so grateful for your help and your friend’s.”
“He’s in construction. I bet he knows every trick of the trade,” she said.
Mrs. Harper’s eyes widened.
“Oh, perfect. Can you handle the building inspector when he comes? I always feel like he’s talking another language.”
“Sure,” Myles said.
She reached out to shake his hand again.
“I can’t thank you enough,” she said, beaming.
On the walk back to Anna’s apartment, she glanced at him. He looked as if he were deep in thought.
“Can you really get some bargain rates?” she asked.
He nodded.
“Our company’s big on supporting local communities, whether here or on location. It builds goodwill.”
“This will build a heap of goodwill. This place runs on a shoestring. Why are you taking such an interest?”
“Told you—”
“There’s more to this than you’re bored. You could find other things to occupy your time. You hardly know us. Why would you do this?”
“It’s a worthwhile project. And I know you and Zack. Why wouldn’t I want to help? It’s not much.”
“It’s a lot.”
“Only because no one else there has a construction background. This is sort of like baking cookies for me,” Myles said.
Anna laughed aloud.
“Baking cookies?”
“Something you do almost without thinking, right?”
She nodded.
“This is nothing compared to building a bridge. Repair a few walls, refurbish some playground equipment. You and the other women will do the painting. This is a walk in the park.”
He reached out and caught her hand in his.
“Besides, I get to spend more time with you.”
Saturday was bright and clear. Edith insisted she was well enough to watch Zack while Myles and Anna worked at the school—and that evening when the two of them were going out.
Anna was excited about the date. She had her whole day planned, including dashing home from the school to shower and change in time for dinner.
When her mother called, she almost blurted it out, but she wasn’t up to a thousand questions, which her mother would have. Instead, she kept the conversation short, telling her mother she’d to leave soon for the school project.
The work day started at nine and Mrs. Harper had urged parents to stay until five. Pizza was being ordered in for lunch.
Anna knew several of the mothers of the children in Zack’s class. They greeted one another and began the tasks as assigned. Myles gathered tools that had been provided and moved to another room. Two men from his company had also shown up to help. They greeted each other and suddenly Anna felt left out. She watched as they caught up on their lives and observed Myles in his element.
All three men were tall, rugged individuals. Competent and assured in their success, but not overblown or arrogant, they quickly set to work and before the morning was over, it was clear the school had been lucky to get these volunteers.
Work procedures were set out and followed. The genial air of camaraderie made it a festive atmosphere.
“Who’s your friend?” Betsy Singleton asked Anna as they began moving furnishings and scrubbing the stained portion on a wall deemed safe enough to repaint and not repair.
“Myles Riker. He’s only here temporarily,” Anna said.
“Too bad. He’s a hunk. Bet Zack loves being around him.”
Anna nodded. “He does.”
“I heard about Zack running away the other day. That must have been scary.”
Anna agreed.
“But he seems to have stopped doing that.”
In the days since they’d met Myles, Zack hadn’t run after a stranger once. For that, she was grateful, but wondered what he’d do when Myles left. She hoped her little boy wouldn’t be heartbroken again.
The morning sped by. Anna was glad for the lunch break. Her shoulders hurt from pushing a paint roller. Since the day was nice, the pizza was served in the playground with a long table set up holding the food and beverages.
Myles joined her once they both picked up their plates. They sat on one of the benches lining the playground. Betsy and her husband shared the bench.
“Brad Singleton,” he introduced himself to Myles and Anna.
She introduced them both and settled in to eat.
“You really know what you’re doing,” Brad said to Myles. “I think we’d all be floundering around without you and your buddies helping.”
“This is a straightforward project,” Myles said.
He took a bite of pizza, chewed it, and then took a long swallow of the soft drink he’d chosen.
“I’m surprised at how many parents turned out. Looks like most of them, would you say?”
Brad glanced around.
“At least. And there are two teenagers from our church helping. Plus your two friends. We might get it all fixed up before the time frame Mrs. Harper estimated.”
“Could. Once the men are shown what to do, they manage fine,” Myles said.
“Not something we’re all used to. You’re in construction, I think I heard someone say.”
Myles nodded, glancing at Anna. She smiled at him.
“Glad to have someone aboard who knows what to do.”
“Apparently Mrs. Harper thinks so,” Anna added. “She’s asked Myles to be the contact guy for the building inspector.”
“Hey, that’s cool. I’m sure you know what to do to get us passed first time. We can’t afford a different preschool for Bethany. I’d hate for her to lose this chance at getting a jump on schooling.”
The discussion veered to talking about the children. Anna was amused to find Myles listening for all he was worth. He contributed little on that topic, but twice agreed when he remembered something Zack had said or done.
Lunch went by too fast.
The afternoon turned out better as everyone got into a rhythm. The festive atmosphere continued as everyone knew they were pulling together for their children and the sake of the school.
Promptly at four forty-five, Mrs. Harper began her rounds, advising people to finish up so they could leave by five.
“Tomorrow we’ll start at one to give everyone a chance to sleep in or go to church. I’m amazed at all that’s been done today.”
She came over to Anna.
“And it’s all thanks to your friend, Myles. He’s been a marvel. He works twice as fast as the others and the work is impeccable. And he got all the supplies and tools donated. I can’t tell you what that means. It’s amazing. We won’t be in the red at the end of the school term. And we’ll have one of the nicest preschools—and safest—in this area. And so I told him.”
Anna felt a warm glow of pride for Myles’s sake. He was volunteering when he should be recuperating. He spent his Saturday helping a school where he had no one attending. Only the son of a new friend.
Maybe more than a friend?
At five, Myles wandered into the classroom, examining the painting.
“Excellent job, ladies,” he said with a smile.
The women beamed at his compliment. Anna grinned. Forgotten was her tiredness. She was glad she could help.
“Ready to go?” he asked her.
“Yes.”
“Not too tired to go out to dinner, are you?” he asked as they began walking toward her apartment.
“No. Are you?”
“I feel fine. Better than fine. Might be the best thing I’ve done for a while.”
“Good.”
He stopped outside her apartment building.
“I’ll go clean up and be back here at seven.”
“Okay. See you then.”
She hurried to the elevator and only when the doors closed behind her did she sag against the wall. She was so tired she could scarcely keep her eyes open. But she wouldn’t admit that to anyone. She wanted to go out with Myles tonight.
Zack and Edith greeted her. Edith was back to normal and had prepared a small dinner for her and Zack. She asked after the school renovations.
“You went to my school?” Zack asked.
“Yes, Myles and I worked on getting it fixed up. It’s going to look terrific before you know it. And it’ll pass all the inspections the city requires. Myles worked harder than anyone,” she told him.
“I want to go with Myles,” Zack said.
“On Tuesday, when you go to school, you ask the teacher to show you where Myles worked, okay?”
“’Kay.”
As Anna prepared for her date, she felt butterflies in her stomach. She’d been on two other dates since Tom had died, both a bust in her opinion.
The first man was nice enough, but they had so little to talk about.
The second hadn’t been especially fond of children and had during the evening asked if she would stop talking about her son so much. That had been an instant turnoff.
After those experiences, she’d declined other invitations to dinner. She was happier with Zack than with men she scarcely knew.
Myles was different. For one thing, he really liked her son.
For another, he enticed her like no other. His kisses drove her crazy. And his calm approach to life was like a balm. She worried all the time that she alone wouldn’t be able to raise Zack, yet around Myles, she felt confident. He’d told her more than once she was doing a good job.
The dress she put on was new. Was it sexy enough to get Myles to sit up and take notice? She pictured him with eyes for only her. She made a face at her fantasy and brushed her hair. Putting on her lipstick, she was ready.
Taking a deep breath, she tried to quell her nerves. For heaven’s sake, she and Myles had spent hours together over the last couple of weeks. This was merely a time for adults, no Zack around. Not so different.
And she vowed she wouldn’t talk about her son all night. Though what they would talk about other than Zack was beyond her at the moment. If not for Zack, they never would have met.
Edith was talking with Zack, and Anna could hear the soft murmur of her voice. He was annoyed that he wasn’t included in tonight’s outing. While sympathetic, Anna had told him that there were some times he didn’t get his own way, and he needed to learn that young. Edith was reinforcing the sentiment.
She heard the knock at the door as she stepped out of her bedroom. And Zack’s “I’ll get it.”
She started to protest, but it would do little good.
When she could see the door, she was surprised to find Myles down at Zack’s level, talking to him. The little boy was nodding, looking solemn.
Myles stood when he saw Anna and smiled. Her heart fluttered. He looked devastatingly handsome in the dark suit and white shirt. His tie was silver and blue. She’d never seen him in a suit before. He was dynamite. Every woman who saw him tonight would envy her.
Anna smiled. It felt good.
“I’m ready,” she said. “What are you up to, Zack?” she asked.
“I will not answer the door without you telling me,” he said, his lower lip sticking out suspiciously like a pout.
“That’s very good.”
She looked at Myles with a question in her eyes.
“I told Zack he needs to develop responsibility, so he’ll be a fine man when he grows up. One way is to mind his mommy when you tell him not to do something.”
“Ah.”
She looked at her son.
He seemed resigned.
“That’s excellent advice.”
Zack turned and ran back to the living room. He climbed up on the sofa beside Edith and looked at the cartoon movies they’d been watching.
“I’m leaving now.”
Anna went to kiss Zack goodbye and exchange last minute words with Edith.
“You look lovely, my dear. Enjoy yourself. Don’t worry a mite about me or Zack.”
“You’re sure you feel up to it?” Anna asked.
“After I put him to bed, I’ll do nothing more than sit on this sofa. I’m fine. Still a bit weak, but not so I can’t watch this young man.”
“I’m gonna be a fine man when I grow up,” Zack said. “Like Myles.”
“You can’t get better than that,” Edith said.
Anna silently concurred.
The restaurant Myles took her to was Italian. She savored the aroma of the food when she first stepped in the lobby.
“You knew Italian was my favorite, didn’t you?” she asked.
“I figured, knowing your mother’s Italian. I love Mediterranean cooking. That’s one of the things I miss in the Middle East. We had a large variety of meals.”
They sat at a small table for two. It was quiet and intimate. The gleaming silverware and crystal sparkled in the subdued lighting. Anna felt like a princess.
The menus were so huge when opened she couldn’t see over hers to Myles. Deciding on the angel hair pasta, she closed it to gaze at Myles. He’d already decided on the veal. When their orders were taken and wine brought to the table, he proposed a toast.
“To the future, may it give us all we want,” he said gravely.
She touched the rim of her glass to his and smiled.
“And what is all you want?” she asked after taking a sip.
“A home, a family, a good living and happiness.”
“Tall order.”
“Do you think so?”
Anna set her glass down carefully and considered her answer.
“Maybe not. My parents still enjoy being married to each other after thirty years. I had a wonderful home life and consider I have a good living now. And Zack makes me so happy.”
She looked at him.
“As a child, I missed out. No family ties. Not even long-term foster care. I lived in four homes from age four until I turned eighteen. Then I was on my own.”
“I thought you said you were still in touch with one family.”
“As in we exchange Christmas cards. They’ve invited me to visit. But I’ve never gone. They were great, but they aren’t kin.”
“You know what they say—you can choose your friends, but you’re stuck with your family. Not being kin isn’t so bad. There’re lots of families and extended families where people aren’t related by blood but who share their lives. Look at Edith. She’s like a devoted aunt to me and Zack. And my parents have friends whom I still see even though we’re a generation apart.”
Myles was silent for a moment. Now would be the time for her to mention she’d adopted Zack and adored him. When she said nothing else, he asked,
“Do you consider blood ties important?”
“Of course. I’m only saying there’re other ways to create a family. Look at all the kids who get adopted. Don’t you think they’re considered part of that family? Or the adopt-a-grandparent project—older people who don’t have family and younger ones who need the influence and love older people can give. Some close friends are like family. My aunt Marge and Uncle George aren’t blood relatives, but they are closer to us than my mother’s sister, who lives in North Carolina.”
Myles took another sip of his wine and then looked at her. Should he tell her now that he knew Zack was adopted? And how he knew? He took a breath and did not.
“I can see your point. But in my case, I have no family. I think it’s time to put down roots.”
She smiled.
“That’s probably the goal of almost everyone. People marry, have families and want the best for their children. Not everyone, fortunately, ends up in foster care. Roots anchor us, give us a base to always connect to.”
“Which is why I want to be there for my child, or children. Things have changed recently. My carefree, footloose days are over. It’s time to settle down.”
He waited for her to confide in him, but she just smiled.
Their salads arrived, and Myles used the interruption to change the subject. It was too soon to push for complete revelation. He felt he was growing closer to Anna each time they were together. Could he do as he said and give up his nomadic ways? He’d felt alone all his life. Would that change if he married and had a hand in raising Zack?
“Tell me about growing up in New York. How different is it from Chicago? We had the lake, you have the rivers. We had snow, N.Y. has snow. You have Broadway, but we have the Magnificent Mile.”
“I grew up in the Upper East Side. We had a nice flat. A park not too far away and a view of the river. Of course, it was between two tall buildings, so a very limited view, but my folks were proud of our sliver of river view. Lots of kids in the building. My best friend, Mary Jane, grew up in the same building. She’s with the Peace Corps now in Nigeria. But we’re inseparable when she’s home. She’s like family.” Anna grinned at him. “Tell me about your favorite foster home.”
“The one where the husband died too young. The Zumwalts were wonderful. He really liked children and played with us every evening after work—even in winter. He said we need not be afraid of the dark, just adapt to lack of light. So we played games like hide-and-seek after dark.”
Anna watched his expressions as memories came to mind. He seemed to enjoy remembering the happy times he’d had with that family. How tragic to lose his biological family and then be wrenched from the foster care that had proved so loving.
“Zack enjoyed playing ball with you. You’ve been good for him. He needs to see how men are. Mostly he’s in a feminine world with me and Edith and his preschool teachers to interact with,” Anna said.
“He needs a father figure,” Myles said slowly. “Do you think little boys need a male role model more than little girls?”
“Maybe. Or maybe they both need that. Isn’t that why normally families have a father and a mother? Each brings something special to the child and balance to a family.”
Anna sat back in her chair, wondering if this talk of family was what Myles wanted. This date was to be for the two of them. To enjoy the evening and being with each other.
She smiled wryly.
“Guess I’m passionate about families, huh? Tell me more about your work. However did you get into a field that takes you from home so long?”
Myles talked about his interest in building, how in college he gravitated toward structural engineering and the path that led him to the work he’d spent more than a decade doing.
He painted a picture Anna could readily see about living in deserts with substandard housing and infrastructures until his company built roads and bridges to facilitate transportation and the beginnings of towns with community buildings and office buildings.
Anna enjoyed listening to him, hearing about the travels he’d done when he got leave. It was fun to explore London and Copenhagen through his memories. He even talked about some of his friends. He seemed to have only a few, but he mentioned them frequently.
She wanted to know more about the land mine, but hesitated to bring it up in case it shattered the mood. How frightening to be going about a normal workday and be injured so severely? And to have a co-worker die.
When the meal ended, the conversation continued.
“Will you miss all that if you settle in the States?” she asked, sipping on the after dinner coffee.
“I think I’ve put in enough time. I’m looking forward to a more normal lifestyle now, like being home every night, having weekends free.”
“Home-cooked meals,” she inserted with a laugh.
“If they are as good as yours. Your mother taught you well.”
“I’ll tell her that.”