Chapter 11
CHAPTER ELEVEN
HENRY
I couldn’t spend all day with Garrun. He worked at night and needed sleep.
I went to my Erabi lessons with Alice, using what we’d learned to practice discussing trade and shopping in the market.
It was a nice lesson, but when they switched to reading, I asked to return to my tent. I had no reason to be there for that.
Alice helped me to my feet, leading me out of the learning tent and pausing at the entrance. “Vaddarr? Would you mind taking Henry back to our tent? He wants to rest.”
“Of course,” Vaddarr agreed. He hadn’t been in the lesson with us, there was a different class for the barbarians not taught in the common tongue, but he must’ve been nearby. When Alice put my hand on Vaddarr’s arm, I made a face, murmuring a quiet apology in his language when he led me away.
“Sorry. You not busy?”
“No,” he told me, and I could hear the gentleness in his voice that Alice had told me about. He seemed almost shy. “You did not wish to stay?”
Shaking my head, I stumbled over a divot in the sand, grasping Vaddarr’s arm a little tighter to keep myself upright. Thankfully, he didn’t comment on it, slowing his steps even more to get me where I needed to go. “They practice reading. I not read.”
“Ah. I understand. Neither can I.”
Surprised, I turned to face him. “Really?”
He hummed, guiding me gently to the left as the sound of footsteps passed by. “I tried. Lessons are taught in common tongue, and the Northern Clan’s scribe created words for our language, too. But I get them mixed up often. It was too frustrating.”
Nodding slowly, I pursed my lips in consideration. “You ask Alice to teach you? She teacher in our home.” I switched to the common tongue, unsure how to finish the thought in his language. “She’s patient, and I’m sure she’d be happy to help.”
The sound he made was curious, like the idea intrigued him, and I was going to push the idea a little more when I heard someone shout. A very familiar someone.
“Garrun?”
I stumbled forward automatically to go searching for him, but Vaddarr stopped me, putting his hand on top of mine.
“He is not hurt,” he told me, his voice solemn. “He has nightmares. They wake him often. You should not go near him. It is not safe.”
My brows furrowed. It didn’t seem right to leave Garrun to suffer through a nightmare alone, but what was I supposed to do? I wasn’t a healer. The only thing I could do was–
“Can you take me to my tent? I want to get my violin.”
There was hope in Vaddarr’s tone when he asked, “You mean to help him?”
“If I can,” I agreed. I’d been told several times now that my music soothed Garrun. He napped whenever we sat together in the forest. If playing my music helped him escape the nightmare and rest, I would play until my fingers bled.
Vaddarr didn’t think it was safe to bring me to Garrun’s tent.
Instead, he set me up nearby, next to a fire where Garrun had brought me before when he’d spent half the time translating for me to ensure I felt included.
I hoped I could bring him the same comfort he so often brought me.
I could still hear him grunting and growling, like he was fighting something in his sleep. I didn’t want him to suffer.
Instead of letting my emotions guide my music, when I rested the bow against the strings, I decided to play the first song my mother ever taught me.
It was soothing to me as a kid, the notes calmer and sweet.
Like a lullaby. It took work to focus on the notes and not listen for Garrun, but eventually, his noises stopped, and I concentrated on what I was doing.
No one bothered me or made any move to stop me.
I wasn’t sure if that was because Vaddarr shared what I was doing or if they could tell on their own, but I heard people moving around me, the area I was in wasn’t isolated like our spot in the forest. If I was disturbing anyone, no one said anything.
I stopped playing when someone brought me some water. There wasn’t much shade where I was sitting, and I was getting overheated, but I wasn’t going to complain if it meant Garrun got rest. I was going to play again when Garrun spoke, his voice gruff like he’d just woken up.
“You are hot.”
Turning to look at him, I shrugged. “You needed sleep.”
He was quiet for a long moment. When I heard his footsteps approach in the sand, I looked in what I hoped was his direction, but with him being so quiet, it was hard to tell.
Large gentle hands took mine, and my heart stuttered when he pressed them against his face, leaning into my palms. Giving me permission to see him, to feel the furrow of his brow and see for myself the way his lips pressed together tightly, like he was fighting his emotions.
His breath brushed warmth against my hands as he said, “Thank you, erska. It helped.”
Falling into old habits, I spoke in the common tongue. “I can play more, if you’re still tired,” I offered, running my fingers lightly through his beard just to feel the texture. I liked it. It tickled.
My breath caught when he caught one of my hands and pressed a kiss against my palm. “No, erska. You will get sick in the sun for so long. But thank you.”
I frowned. “You stayed up with me to wash the laundry and eat. You can’t have gotten much sleep. You should sleep more.”
He shook his head, the motion rubbing his face against my palms in a way that stole a smile from me before I could stop myself. “I do not wish for you to get hurt.”
“Then I’ll play in your tent,” I insisted. “You should rest.”
I wasn’t sure if that was allowed, or if perhaps it was a little forward of me to demand entry into his space, but I wasn’t willing to give this up. Garrun was a sweet man. He needed rest. If I could help, I wanted to.
I felt his mouth quirk, the hint of a smile peeking out before he kissed my palm again. “Okay. We will rest in my tent, but if your fingers hurt, you stop. I do not need much sleep. I have had less in the past.”
I made a face at him, allowing him to take my violin from where it was resting in my lap and put it back in the case so we could move to his tent. “That doesn’t make me feel better, Garrun. Just because you had less doesn’t mean you deserve less.”
Removing my hands from his face, he laced our fingers instead, helping me stand and guiding me around the log I’d been sitting on and a short distance away.
He led me carefully into his tent, ushering me to a spot he must’ve deemed good enough and sitting me down.
The surface was a lot like my bed, so I assumed that’s where I was sitting.
Garrun crawled in behind me a lot like Ekkar did, turning on his side so I could lean against his chest if I wanted.
I smiled to myself, pulling out my violin and readjusting to make myself a little more comfortable.
“You will move away if I dream,” he insisted. “I do not wish to hurt you.”
I nodded once in agreement. “If you dream, I’ll move. But I’ll try my best to ensure you won’t. Now get some rest. I’m okay here.”
I played for a little while, sometimes pausing to listen to Garrun’s deep breathing just to make sure he was asleep and not just appeasing me.
He slept on as long as I was playing, one arm slung lightly around me and resting on my hip.
I’d intended to play until he woke up again, or at least until the next meal, but as the day grew hotter, my own eyes started to feel heavy, and I found myself leaning more and more against Garrun’s chest. If I wasn’t careful, I was going to put myself to sleep just as effectively as I had for Garrun.
GARRUN
When I woke again, hours had passed, and the sun was no longer at its peak.
The air was quiet, so I first thought that Henry had left or at least put his instrument away, but when I opened my eyes, I found him curled on his side, his back pressed against my chest, his instrument held lightly in his hands like he’d fallen asleep in the middle of playing.
Shifting to my elbow, I looked down at him, taking in the softness of his appearance, the way his lips parted in his sleep, and he curled ever so slightly around his instrument like even in his sleep, he was protective of it.
I could understand this. His instrument helped him work through his thoughts. Losing it would be tragic.
With that in mind, I carefully took it out of his hands and moved it back to its case.
There was a spot inside for both parts, along with a few spare things that looked like replacements for parts of the instrument tucked inside.
I eyed the contents curiously. If need be, could we find those parts in a nearby town or Al Nuzem’s capital, or would we need to request the items from the traders when they made their journey north?
My movement must have woken Henry because he started to shift and stretch, arms pulled over his head as his body pulled taut.
I couldn’t decide if the move was more cute or made me want to climb on top of him and take his mouth more thoroughly than we had in the forest the day before.
Perhaps it wasn’t the smartest idea to bring him to my tent.
It was harder to resist the idea when we were alone with a bed nearby.
“Garrun?”
I hummed, putting a hand on his knee to let him know I was still there. “I am here, erska. Did you rest well?”
Sitting up, he scrubbed his hands over his face and let them drop heavily, his brows drawn together in a frown. “Yes, but I didn’t intend to sleep. It got too warm in here.”
This I understood. The warmth of my tent during the day encouraged sleep, which only made the nightmares more frustrating for me. “Next time, we will go to our spot. It is better.”
Letting out a wide yawn that he hid behind his hand, he nodded. “Sounds good. Did you sleep okay? Did the music help?”
I paused before answering, considering his words.
While yes, the music did help me to fall back asleep, I was curious to know how long after he’d fallen asleep himself.
Not even Ekkar would sleep next to me because of how erratic my movements were in my sleep.
That Henry slept beside me and was not only uninjured, but got rest himself, was a little shocking.
Was it only the music that made me sleep so deeply, or did Henry’s presence have something to do with it?
“Garrun?”
Since it seemed to ease his mind when he could touch my face to see me, I took his hand, kissing the palm before placing it on my cheek. “Yes, erska. The music helped. Thank you.”
His fingers immediately started moving, tracing along my nose and over my brow. I relished in the touch, leaning into it as his other hand joined the first, following the curve of my mouth as I smiled at him. He smiled back, looking pleased with the response.
“Alice said whenever she saw you, you were always frowning. That doesn’t seem to be the case with me.”
That’s because you truly see me. I did not say the words aloud. I promised myself I would not rush him. He said he was never close to anyone before now, outside of his kin. He seemed overwhelmed after our kiss. I would go slow for him. I would do anything for Henry.
Henry’s lips quirked up a little more. “So soft,” he murmured. “Maybe people haven’t seen you smile because they aren’t looking close enough.”
His sweet words drew me closer, and I gave in to the urge to claim his lips.
He didn’t jump like the first time, smiling against my mouth as he pressed his lips to mine.
There was no hesitation in his touch, nothing like what I’d heard from other clan brothers with male bondmates.
Those men, raised in towns that would persecute them for their interests, were often shy or anxious when first spending time with a male partner.
Not Henry. His kisses were filled with joy and pleasure, like the thought of being with a man was of no issue to him.
It made me feel better knowing my touches didn’t frighten him or make him feel unsure.
He practically purred when I pulled him closer, letting out a soft moan when my tongue slid against his.
I was unsure who moved first. I’d thought to hold back, to wait for a sign from Henry, but he tugged on my clothes to draw me closer, and I crawled on top of him almost at the same time.
It happened so fast, it felt as though one moment we were sitting near each other, trading kisses and soft touches, the next, I was on top of him, hands gripping him a little tighter as I tried to somehow pull him closer to me while Henry tangled our legs together, his fingers digging into my hair.
Gasping against my mouth, Henry lifted his hips to grind against mine. “G-Garrun…”
“Do you wish for me to stop?” I asked, determined to ignore the throb in my cock and the insistent urge to grind against him until we reached completion together. The choice was up to him.
“N-No, but…” His hips shifted again, his breathing becoming choppy as he moved against me. “I’m a little worried I’m going to make a mess of my clothes.”
A slow smile spread across my face, one he saw when his hand ran up my arm and neck to touch my face. He flushed, giving me a disgruntled look. “Shut up.”
Barking out a laugh, I dragged him into another heated kiss, pulling away when he began grinding against me again. “Allow me to help you, erska. I do not wish for you to have to clean the clothes twice in one day.”
Reaching between us, I pulled his tunic free of his trousers and moved it out of the way before turning to his legwear.
His boots prevented me from removing them entirely, but I decided it was for the best. If I truly got him naked in my bed, I worried I wouldn’t be able to go slow like I promised.
It had been a long time since I shared pleasure with another.
“Oh, gods…” he moaned as I took his cock in my hand and stroked it lightly.
I had an oil in my chest that I would fetch in a moment, but I couldn’t resist touching him first. His pale, creamy skin was unblemished, his stomach smooth instead of toned like my clan brothers.
His cock was a ruddy red, leaking from the tip, and sizeable enough to be impressive for a man built like him.
I spread the liquid escaping him down his shaft, marveling at the way his body writhed and his teeth sank into his bottom lip, like he was trying to muffle the sounds threatening to escape him.
“No, erska. Do not hide from me. I want to hear your music.”