Chapter 23
I didn’t realize we’d both fallen asleep until I felt Finn squirming again. It couldn’t have been long, it was still dark and the lantern was still lit, but he was moving like he wanted to get free of my hold.
“Finn?” I asked blearily.
He froze, looking over his shoulder at me guiltily. “Y-Yes?”
“What’s wrong? Why are you trying to pull away?”
If he was uncomfortable or in pain, I wanted to know so I could take care of him. I asked the healers for a salve to help his discomfort, but I’d fallen asleep before I could use it on him.
“N-Nothing is wrong. Go back to sleep.”
That sounded suspicious, and not like my Finn. Sitting up, I looked down at him to better understand what was going on. And what I found surprised me. Finn was aroused, trying to hide his cock behind his hands as he blushed furiously and avoided my eye. A smile tugged at my lips, but I pursed my lips to hide it, guiding his chin so he could look at me.
“Kolrav. Why are you hiding from me?”
He squeezed his eyes shut, his shoulders by his ears. “I’m sorry! I didn’t want to wake you, but I couldn’t stop thinking about what we did and how amazing it was, and I couldn’t calm down. I was only going to step outside to cool off so you could rest, and– mmph!”
It took very little effort to flip him and pin his hands above his head, exposing his needy cock to me. Pushing my tongue into his mouth stopped his rambling, and after a quick check to make sure he was ready, I was pushing inside him again. He let out that sound he’d made when we started, a desperate sort of moan that told me he was getting exactly what he craved. Guiding his legs around my hips, I rocked into him, swallowing his moans until he stiffened and came with a cry. The tight grip of his ass on my cock was enough to drag my release from me moments later. Breathless and still buried inside him, I shifted my weight to my forearms and ran my fingers through his unruly curls.
“No matter the time of day or night, I will gladly give you what you need. Had I thought you were ready for it, I would have asked right after the first time. But you needed rest. I don’t want to hurt you.” He opened his mouth to argue, but I silenced his protests with a kiss before leveling him with a look. “You never have to go off alone anymore. It’s my job as your bondmate to take care of you. I want to take care of you. You are not a burden to me, Finn. You are my everything.”
Big tears filled his eyes and he closed his eyes when I leaned my forehead against his. I knew this was not about me but the way he was raised. It was hard for him to see himself as worthwhile after years being on his own. I would spend my life showing him he deserved to be cared for, until he finally believed me.
“I love you,” he murmured. He’d said that before, but I still didn’t know what it meant, as he always said it in his language. But then he repeated it in the clan tongue, and I finally understood.
“You are my other half.”
My chest felt tight as my heart filled to bursting. Dipping my head, I took his lips in a soft kiss, pouring every ounce of my love for him into it. When I lifted my head, his tears were accompanied by a smile. Happy tears. I could accept this.
“And you are mine, kolrav. You will always be mine.”
It took some reassurance from Rath that I wasn’t being bothersome by asking for more of his attention. After I woke him for the third time and he smiled as he pushed inside me, I was beginning to believe him. The fourth time surprised even me. I was insatiable, finally experiencing the kind of pleasure I’d only ever dreamed of. I recreated waking him up that morning, but this time by sitting on his cock. He woke up with his head thrown back, groaning out his pleasure, and took me with a punishing pace in response.
I passed out after that round, too exhausted to go again. Rath used a salve on me after each round, but I didn’t even feel him apply it before I was asleep. I woke up tucked against his side, covered in soft furs, and so unbelievably sore, it brought tears to my eyes.
“I worried you would feel like this in the morning,” Rath said, worry in his voice. When I looked up at him, he was already awake, his thumb stroking my cheek as he studied me with a frown. I wanted to complain about the pain, but I couldn’t regret what we’d done.
I shook my head, forcing myself to remember the pleasure as opposed to the pain. “I’m okay.”
He raised a knowing eyebrow and I corrected myself.
“I’ll be okay. I don’t regret it. I don’t regret a single moment with you.”
A smile spread across his face, and he distracted me from the pain for a little while with soft kisses and loving caresses, until my bladder protested and we had to get up.
“You know what would help ease the soreness?” he asked as I came back around the tree I’d used for privacy.
I tipped my head curiously. “What?”
He gave a significant look to the river.
“Oh no. No! It’s too cold!”
He didn't let me argue with him, plucking me off my feet and into his arms with a laugh. I tried to wriggle free, but he was too strong.
“Please, Rath! It’s too cold!”
“I’ll keep you warm,” he said, kissing my forehead as he walked us straight into the icy water. He wasn’t wrong that it helped ease the pain, but it also made me numb all over, and the little fire he built in front of our tent wasn’t enough to warm me. I curled under one of the furs, shivering, while he made the flames a little bigger, but it wasn’t until he picked me up and sat in front of it with me cuddled in his arms that my teeth stopped chattering.
“You’re mean,” I whined when I noticed he was fighting off a smile.
Chuckling, he peppered my face with kisses until I smiled back at him. “I’m sorry, my Finn. I only wanted to help.”
I pushed out my lip in a pout. “Maybe it helped numb it, but it didn’t make it go away.”
“No. That will take time. The salve helps. I’ll apply more after we eat.”
The clan had provided a gift basket of smoked meats, breads, and fruit for us so we could hole away together for a few days without being interrupted. No one had told me about this part, and I was thrilled when Rath said we’d be staying together in bed for three days. I was less thrilled when I realized I would be too sore to enjoy it past the first night.
“You’re pouting,” Rath pointed out, rubbing his forehead against mine. “Tell me why so I can fix it.”
That made me smile. My big barbarian was always so determined to take care of me. I just wish he could do it in the same way he did last night. One night wasn’t enough.
“I wish we could’ve had more than just one night. We can’t do anything more because I’m sore.”
If my family saw me pouting like this, they would have berated me for days about acting like a man. Rath only smirked and shook his head.
“No, kolrav. There is more. Much more.”
He had a look in his eye that promised I’d enjoy the things he was thinking about. Maybe not with him inside me, but there was more than just that to explore.
“Really?”
“Want me to show you?”
My sweet barbarian had already shown me so much. Kindness, patience, acceptance. From day one, he was determined to make my life better than I ever dreamed it could be. He showed me what it meant to be a true family, and how to trust someone after I’d been so hurt before. He showed me how to love. How to accept love in return, though I was still learning that one. He never rushed me or demanded more than I could give. And each lesson only made me fall further in love with him.
I looked forward to whatever it was he wanted to show me next.