2 – Ginny
I spent the night on the living room couch, sitting and thinking more than sleeping. The thought of going upstairs to share a bed with Henry felt... wrong, which was not a feeling many mated couples experienced. But then again, not many mated couples were the Alpha couple of the fourth largest pack in the country. I hated to admit it, but right after Henry and I discovered we were fated to each other, I’d felt very strong and very misplaced pride at being mated to such a powerful male.
I used to love being Luna, attending pack functions on his arm, and commanding the heart of the male who commanded the pack. The passage of time, however, had taken the shine off of things, and revealed the position of prestige and power to be merely a bronze statue covered with a thin layer of very low-quality gold. By then, it was too late to do anything about it.
What options did a she-wolf like me have now? I didn't have a lot of my own money, merely what I had left over from my monthly allowance that I kept in a box in my wardrobe. I didn’t own any property, none of us technically did, it all belonged to the pack. I had a lot of expensive jewelry I could sell. I didn’t have any formal training or higher education, but I was willing to work and learn along the way.
A plan started forming in my mind – if my mate was really going to go through with this, there was nothing left for me in this pack. I couldn't bear the humiliation nor the charade of living with Henry after he’d impregnated another female, not to mention raise their pup as our own. It was no surprise that a room full of males came up with this plan.
I heard the shower running in the upstairs bathroom, so I ran to gather my clothes and get ready for the day without running into him. As soon as I was washed and dressed, I darted out of the house and towards Lucy’s. I knew that Nora woke her up early and that I would not be disturbing her. As soon as she opened the door, she gasped and drew me into a hug.
“Oh Ginny, Calum told me last night what happened; oh my God, it is all so horrible,” she murmured into my hair, and I felt my body relaxing for the first time since dinner, simply due to hearing someone else verbalize how wrong the whole idea was.
We approached their breakfast table, where Calum was trying to feed Nora, and he shot me a compassionate look.
“Good morning, Luna.”
“Good morning, Calum. Hello Nora,” I greeted them and the two-year-old giggled at the silly voice I did for her, like always.
“Please, Ginny, eat with us,” Lucy implored, and I sat down despite not having any appetite whatsoever. I gratefully clutched the mug of tea she handed me.
“So I guess everyone knows,” I said somewhat bitterly and Calum cleared his throat.
“The Elders, me, and Liam are the only ones who know for now. Before the female is chosen, an announcement will be made to the pack so that the volunteers can be examined and interviewed.”
I imagined an army of willing females descending on the pack house and eagerly submitting themselves to invasive medical examinations because they desired to be bred by my powerful mate. The thought made me sick.
“Is there any way – are they not breaking mating laws by doing this?” I grasped onto my last hope and the reason why I came here - I wanted to file a formal complaint with the Royal Court in Colorado, the highest shifter authority that had the last word when it came to territory, power, and mating disputes. I wouldn't file the complaint in order to get Henry back, but merely to prevent them from doing this to me. By the way Calum wouldn’t meet my gaze, I already knew his answer.
“Unfortunately, Luna, there is precedent in the old laws. Alphas are allowed to breed concubines chosen from volunteering unmated pack members if they haven’t found their fated mate and are over the age of 24. They likened your, khm, situation to that one, and, using the limited procreation window of shifters, they would probably win any appeal. They covered all their bases. I’m sorry.”
I understood the issue theoretically. Only an Alpha could beget an Alpha. Without an heir, the pack was in danger of falling into anarchy upon the Alpha’s potential untimely demise and was viewed as weak and futureless by other packs who might have expansion plans even while the leader was alive. That was the political side of it.
On the other hand, our nature had played a cruel joke on shifters – we were the fastest, strongest, and deadliest apex predators in existence who could also shape-shift, but in order to protect our food sources from us becoming too numerous, we had a lot of limitations around conception. Females could only conceive during heats that occurred twice a year, we never had more than two pups (with the exception of that one family in Utah), males rarely fathered pups after they turned 35, and female heats generally stopped after the female turned 32 years old. Some could still be induced with the appropriate herbs, but as I knew well from recent experience, the process was grueling and was ultimately mostly fruitless anyway.
“Well, I guess there’s nothing we can do then,” I said and stared at my plate, thinking of the one thing I still could do.
After breakfast with the Phillips family, I made my way to Dotty’s house. I needed her. Luckily, Jonathan was at work, so I was free to break down in her arms and, in between sobs, tell her what had happened last night.
“Oh, my sweet girl, what an awful, awful thing. That male doesn’t deserve you, I’ve been telling you for a while now, him and his harpy of a mother -”
“I know Dorothy, I know, but he is my mate. You know this as well as I do, it’s not like I can reject my mate and choose another one. It’s him or nothing.”
“I know Ginny, damn it. Sometimes I wish the old legends were true, the ones from back home.”
“I know, Dotty. I wish so too. I would be rewarded for my patience during this terrible ordeal and I would get a new mate, a poor lumberjack this time,” I said dreamily, making Dorothy laugh with abandon.
“A lumberjack? Why?” She started wheezing at this point.
“No more Alphas for me. A simple male with a forest cabin will do. All I want is him and his love. No politics, no pack, no bigger picture stuff.”
“And then, during the winter, you’ll be cozy in the cabin and have all the wood you need,” she winked mischievously, and it was my turn to laugh.
“Dotty! You old perv!” I hit her with the couch cushion before laying my head in her lap, enjoying her fingers in my hair, and feeling like the 10-year-old who used to do this while talking to Dotty about mates and her changing body.
“Got you laughing, didn’t I?” She asked smugly, proud of herself, and I shook my head with a smile. Only she could make me laugh after the sob-fest I just had.
“I’m gonna run away,” I whispered and her fingers stilled. She sighed.
“I figured you might. I can’t see you staying and enduring whatever they have planned. I just hoped,” her voice cracked a bit and she stopped talking, so I sat up and took both her hands in mine.
“I know, I also wish it didn’t have to come to this.”
She composed herself quickly and was back to the ever-pragmatic female I knew and loved.
“What is the plan?”
“I’ll take all the money and jewelry I can carry, and during the tryouts for the pack whore, I will run as far as I can get as my wolf. And I’ll keep running until I find a human town where I can sell some of the jewelry. Then I’ll get on a train or something to get as far away from here as possible. And I’ll live among the humans. That’s what I have for now,” I looked at her expectantly and she nodded.
“That would be the wisest course of action. No pack will harbor you if your mate wants you back. Even worse, since he’s an Alpha, going against him means going to war against his pack.”
“Not even my parents would risk that,” I verbalized what we were both thinking and she looked at me sadly.
“Wait here,” she instructed and ran to the back of the house, where I heard her rummaging through cupboards. She came back holding a thick envelope, which she handed to me.
“What is this, Dotty?”
“Money. And don’t even start with me. You need it and I want you to have it. Let me do this for you, my pup.”
“Thank you,” I croaked out with tears in my eyes. I wanted to say more, I wanted to say I’d pay her back, I wanted to tell her she was the only mother I could ever need in this world, but the words were stuck in my throat and it didn't matter because she knew all of it anyway, because she knew me best.
“Hush now. Give me a hug and make me some lunch.”
???
“We’ll make the announcement tomorrow at breakfast. Together,” Henry told me casually over dinner. “And then the day after that, the Elders and I will choose the breeder.”
I'd made risotto using the broth I’d prepared the day before and served it with pan-seared salmon and roasted asparagus. It all tasted like cardboard but I kept eating because my body needed fuel.
“No, thanks,” I replied politely.
“You will be there and you will look excited, Regina,” he looked like he was going to have a stroke of some kind. A vein in his temple was pulsing.
“I will not. I am not excited and I will not be pretending to be.”
“This is your duty, Regina, you forget yourself.”
“I don’t care. I may not have the power to prevent you from doing things, but I certainly have power over my reaction to them, and I will not be faking it “for the pack.” I think I’ve done more than enough for this pack.”
“I will command you,” he said darkly, and I gasped. Every Alpha had the power to command his pack members in broad terms, things such as “tell the truth” or “stop resisting.” Such commands were to be used in the most extreme circumstances, such as trials, interrogations, arrests, or hostage extractions. That particular power carried with it a tremendous amount of responsibility, since it harmed the other wolf physically every time it was used. In the process of breaking a wolf's mental resistance, the command broke something in their body as well. It was not to be used lightly, it was not to be used for personal gain, and most of all, it was never ever to be used against one’s Luna.
“You wouldn’t – Henry, that’s low, even for you.”
“Keep pushing me and see where we end up. I’ve had enough of the attitude.”
“Well, I’ve had enough of many things as well, yet no one cares.”
“I keep trying to make you understand, and yet you keep making it difficult. I'm the Alpha. This is my pack. It is my duty to provide the pack with an heir. If I can’t do it with you, I must do it with someone else. Do you think I'm enjoying this? Do you think I'll like having my wolf drugged in order to be able to go through with it?”
“Well, that's the difference between you and me, Henry. Even if my wolf were drugged, I wouldn't be able to cheat on you. I couldn’t stomach sleeping with someone else, making love to someone else while knowing I was yours, human and wolf. But you keep telling yourself whatever makes you feel better.”
I got up and went to the living room, where I spent another sleepless night on the couch, during which I decided I’d lay low for the next day and a half until he was in the middle of the selection process. Then I’d make my escape. It would serve me better not to rock the boat too much before that because I wouldn’t put it past Henry to command me to obey him. How did we get here? How was my mate already working on committing one unforgivable sin and threatening me with another one? How and when did our relationship deteriorate this badly? Was there something we could have done to prevent this? Was there a point at which we took a wrong turn that led us here? Luckily, exhaustion knocked me out shortly before sunrise and I awoke to the tingles from Henry shaking my shoulder gently.
“Wake up, Ginny, we have to go in an hour.”
I stood there in my bright yellow dress, my long hair in a fishtail braid, with Henry’s hand on my lower back, while his voice boomed across the full pack hall:
“Dear pack members, today marks a significant day for our pack. After much contemplation and prayer, my Luna and I have decided, with the support of the Council of Elders, that I will choose a concubine to breed from among our pack’s unmated females who volunteer for that honor.
The honor of providing an heir to the Spruce Mountain pack, the fourth largest pack in the country,” he announced and was interrupted by applause, cheers, and someone even whistled. I hated all of them so much.
“Tomorrow at 3, all the interested females should come to the Council chambers, where they will undergo a series of medical tests and an interview. We hope to announce the results the day after tomorrow and then begin the process as soon as possible. Me and my mate couldn’t be more excited for this journey,” here, he dug his claws into my back, and I forced a smile on my face, but I didn’t try too hard to make it a believable one.
Afterward, his mother approached us with a delighted smile on her face.
“Henry, dear, I'm glad you finally decided to heed my advice,” she said triumphantly as she kissed him on the cheek and then turned to me: “And I'm glad you finally accepted reality, Regina, and stopped being selfish. This is not about you, it's about the pack.”
I looked at her evil, spiteful face, and decided to give myself a little going away present.
“You had Henry five years into your mating, right? And no pups after him? I wonder why you were so selfish,” I said and immediately felt lighter, it was almost like taking a deep breath after having been underwater for too long.
Her eyes widened and she took a threatening step towards me before Henry decided to interfere, “Enough, Mother. It’s done, go and be happy elsewhere.”
For a moment, he reminded me of my Henry, the male who used to put me first and who protected me, but now he was someone I needed protection from.
“I let that one slide because you’ve been good during the announcement. Don’t make it a habit,” he hissed at me while dragging me through the crowd, smiling and nodding at the ecstatic pack members. One more day, I thought to myself, just keep it cool for one more day.
For our last dinner together, I decided to cook the same thing I'd cooked for Henry for our first dinner together as a mated couple – roast chicken with mashed potatoes and gravy. It was a simple, comforting, delicious meal, and my stupid sentimental heart had to say goodbye in some way.
The next day, I packed all of my jewelry and two changes of clothes, together with five pairs of underwear, into a small duffle bag which I’d be able to carry in my mouth in wolf form. There was nothing else in the entire house I would want to take with me.
I spent the better part of the morning in Henry’s home office, going over maps of our pack territory and the closest human settlements, planning a mental route for my escape. Once it was past 3, I went out the back door, shifted, and ran as fast as I could.
My stomach was tense with anxiety and elation, and some part of me still couldn’t believe I was doing this, that I was running away from everything I’d ever known to start over in the completely unfamiliar human world.
Yet I was happy, and my wolf was proud of me, although I could feel her sadness at abandoning her mate. The wolf side of our mate hadn’t done anything to harm us, and we were both sorry that we were leaving him behind. When I approached the border, I saw a gray mass of fur in my peripheral vision and it knocked me to my side. I dropped the bag and snarled at the wolf, who was soon joined by three others, all equally menacing in demeanor. I recognized their scents, they were pack enforcers, but what were they doing here?
“Shift, Regina,” Henry ordered from somewhere behind me and I closed my eyes but had no choice but to obey.
“I knew you would pull something like this. I was notified by your guard as soon as you left the house. You forget that I know who you are deep inside,” he whispered in my ear while I stood there completely naked. The enforcers had all disappeared somewhere as soon as I shifted back. I didn’t think he’d care enough to have me followed, but I’d underestimated his ego.
“I told you what would happen if you continued to disobey me,” he said, clutching my wrist angrily, and I felt panic grip me like never before.
“Henry, no, please, just let me leave and you can have all the pups you want with whoever you want, just, please - ”
“Don’t leave pack territory,” he commanded in his unmistakable Alpha voice and I felt the command painfully take root in my bones.
I fell to my knees on the cold forest ground, and I wept for what felt like hours before getting up and going back home.