Chapter 50
Chapter
Fifty
REID
My stomach was in knots as I knocked on Zander’s door.
I’d spent dozens of hours with him over the past few days, sleeping wrapped around him, unwilling to let go after we’d come so close to losing everything.
I’d eagerly soaked up every affectionate kiss and delighted in the strength of his hard body surrounding mine.
Whenever he wasn’t working, we’d chatted, sharing stories about ourselves and our lives prior to meeting, then we’d snuggled together, exchanging sweet kisses and getting to know the feel of each other’s bodies.
It had taken a while to calm down after the excitement of rescuing those omegas, followed by an intense interview with SSA Rainier, in which I’d told him everything that had happened to me at the hands of my old coven.
But now, I was well-rested, refreshed, and able to think completely clearly. I knew one thing with absolute certainty: I wanted Zander.
And finally, I was ready to claim him.
I knew old issues would crop up, but for now, my entire being practically vibrated with hope for the future.
When Zander opened the door, I almost swallowed my tongue. I was used to him being clean-shaven and put-together but now he wore only sweatpants riding low on his hips and his cheeks and jaw were thickly stubbled.
His chest… Wow, it was a work of art.
He had defined muscles, a light dusting of hair, and plum-colored nipples that were peaked from the cold.
Heat flooded me. My hole instinctively softened and grew damp.
A couple of weeks ago, this response would have frightened me because I knew his senses were keen enough to detect my desire. But I’d become used to reacting this way over the past days, and now, I celebrated my body’s resilience.
I’d been through so much, but I was still able to experience desire for an alpha who deserved it. One who was good and decent and trustworthy.
My Zander.
“Can we talk?” I asked, meeting his beautiful brown eyes, full of so much affection I felt like I might choke on it.
He held the door open. “Come in.”
I brushed past him, breathing in his comforting scent. He smelled like home.
Zander closed the door. “The living room is through there.” He motioned to a doorway. “I’ll join you in a moment.”
I went through to the living room and sat on a huge, squishy sofa. He’d definitely opted for furniture large enough to fit his own big frame and those of his family members.
Zander padded in, his sexy chest now covered by a plain white T-shirt. I grimaced. He probably thought that by covering himself he was making me more comfortable, but my priorities had changed. I enjoyed the view.
“Can I get you a hot drink?” he asked, hovering a few yards in front of me. “Tea? Coffee?”
“No, thank you.” If I dragged this out for too long, I might lose my nerve. Or get impatient and jump him.
“Okay then.” He started to sit on one of the armchairs, but I patted the seat beside me.
He strode over and sat beside me. “What would you like to talk about?” he asked gently, those steady eyes never wavering from my face.
I bit my lip, the knots in my gut tangling and drawing tighter. I drew in a deep breath and exhaled roughly. “I know I’m not the easiest person to care about.”
He flinched and frowned but didn’t interrupt.
“But for some reason, you seem to. And I’ve seen the kind of man you are. I trust you with everything.” Forcing myself to be brave, I held his gaze. “If you still want to, I’d like to mate with you.”
“You’re not difficult to care about,” he said fiercely. “Don’t ever think that of yourself. You’re worth more than the sun and moon combined, and I will wait as long as it takes for you to be ready to mate with me. There’s no rush, sweetheart.”
I raised my chin. “I love you, and I want to be your mate.”
He reached for my hand, then hesitated. I slipped my hand into his, loving how rough and warm it was. How big it felt around mine.
Zander was capable of violence, but he’d never hurt me.
“You love me?”
“Yes,” I whispered, suddenly shy.
“Then I’m the luckiest man alive.” There wasn’t a hint of doubt in his voice.
“I love you so much. I’ve been fighting my instincts every day, trying not to pressure you, but I want to mate with you.
I’ll never deny that. I love you, and I want you.
I’d kill for you, and I’d die for you. But are you sure you’re ready? ”
I nodded, holding his gaze, and a silken strand of tension drew taut between us, thrumming with unspoken desire. “Please make me yours.”
His hand tightened almost imperceptibly on mine. “Tell me if you want me to stop or slow down. The control is yours. Promise me.”
I nodded again, feeling shaky and fluttery and tingly inside.
“I need the words, Reid.”
“Yes, I promise.”
He curved his free hand around the side of my face and cradled the nape of my neck. I shivered and relaxed into him, my body knowing what it needed even if my mind hadn’t released the last of its nerves.
The first time I’d been mated by Trent was seared in my memory.
Violent.
Bloody.
Painful.
Trent had torn into my shoulder without sparing a thought for my well-being as he’d taken me.
But this time would be different. I trusted that.
Zander dipped his head and brushed his lips against mine. They were surprisingly soft. I breathed him in—that faint scent of pine I loved so much—and kissed him again.
Sweet.
Chaste.
Tender.
My heart swelled and tears stung my eyes.
“Are you okay?” he murmured, searching my eyes.
“Perfect.”
How could I be any other way when he touched me like I was cherished?
He kissed me again and this time, I darted my tongue out to taste his lips. Heat flashed through me and I pressed closer, scrambling onto his lap. I wound my arms around his neck and kissed him deeper, his tongue coming out to meet mine.
We made out like teenagers until we were both panting and breathless. He drew back, his forehead resting against mine, our mouths only a couple of inches apart.
“We don’t have to go further. Never doubt that I want you.” He groaned and squeezed his eyes briefly shut. “So damn much. But we can kiss and date and work our way up to more.”
I nuzzled the underside of his neck where it was warm and smelled of him. “I’m tired of wanting something and not letting myself have it. I want a mate who treats me well. I want a father that my baby can be proud of. And I want a fucking orgasm.”
A grin stole across his face and he chuckled. “Well, far be it from me to get between you and an orgasm.”