Chapter 8 Silver
Silver
I picked her flowers.
I wanted starsprouts, because I know how much they mean to her, but the colder winter months have forced them into slumber, making the nights darker than we’d all grown accustomed to.
So I did the next best thing—a collection of wildflowers in the bold hues of a sunrise.
Her favorite time of day. I had to hunt the forest for warm, sheltered patches of grass where bits of fall foliage still survived.
It took almost an hour for me to gather enough to fill my hands.
But when I hear a male voice ask Mance if she is his fiancée, when I hear Mance say yes, the flowers fall from my hands, splaying across the marble at my feet.
And then, before I even have a moment to think, the door swings open, bringing me face-to-face with the man who spoke. And my head is spinning for a completely different reason.
“You?”
Staring down at me like I’m a bug beneath his feet is the guy who fought so viciously in the fighting rings. The guy I tried to get a job for so he could have a better life. Ruin. I had thought the name self-deprecating, but now it feels like a threat.
How could Mance’s fiancé possibly be him?
“Silver,” he greets me, smiling unkindly.
“So nice to see you.” Then he turns back to Mance and tosses a parting comment over his shoulder.
“If you’re wondering how I got into the palace and close enough to free your father, by the way, you can thank this man right here.
He was embarrassingly easy to trick into it. ”
He shoulders past me, and I let him, stunned.
What does he mean that he freed her father? What does he mean it’s my fault?
And then he gives me a parting comment, too, one that pushes all the other thoughts out. “Hands off her from now on, by the way. She’s spoken for.”
I feel a surge of incredulous anger, dark and all-consuming.
And for a rare moment I am speechless. Ruin’s footsteps echo down the hall, each one like a hammer to my head, and yet I do nothing to stop him, nothing to stake my own claim.
I don’t even punch him in the face, although if I’m being honest, the prospect is appealing.
Finally, I raise my head and look at Mance.
Or rather at Poise. I realize it immediately, because only Poise can look this specific brand of stunning.
All the parts of Mance are gorgeous, of course, but Poise’s beauty is the most deliberate, the most intentional.
She can wield her beauty like a weapon, and right now it’s spearing me in the heart.
My breath catches in my throat, and it hurts.
Did she get all dressed up like this for him?
“I feel like I’ve missed a couple things,” I say bitterly, crushing the flowers beneath my boots as I step into the room. The grand double doors click shut and I lean against them, arms folded across my chest. “Would you care to fill me in?”
Poise rises, slowly, studying me like she’s trying to figure out what tactic will make this conversation go smoothly. “I can understand why you might be agitated, given the upsetting nature of whatever you heard—”
“Don’t do that with me, Mance,” I snap. “Don’t speak formally, don’t cater to my feelings, don’t be delicate. Tell me what is going on. You’re engaged to Ruin?!”
She sighs. “That man’s name is Reltas, actually, and he’s the Prime of the Forest Realm.”
What?! I flash back to the way Ruin—Reltas, whatever—had another kid’s face ground into the floor as he punched him until he vomited.
That guy has control of an entire realm?
That’s . . . alarming. But also quite definitely not the main issue here.
“His name wasn’t actually the thing I was hoping you’d deny,” I scowl.
Poise’s eyes flick down to the frankly enormous jewel on her finger and my stomach curdles as my own gaze is drawn to it, too. It’s gaudy. Garish. More than I could ever afford. “Unfortunately,” Poise starts, “due to circumstances that—”
“Just say it,” I lash out.
Her mask slips, and for a moment she looks heartbroken. “Yes,” she says softly. “Yes, all right? I am engaged. But not by choice, Silver!”
I stalk toward her. “How could it not be by choice? You’re a Prime now. No one can make you do anything.”
She launches into some kind of legalese explanation of the situation that I couldn’t care less about, but I cut her off.
“What happened to the girl who took the throne instead of waiting for it? You’re really going to let some old piece of paper tell you that you have to marry a sociopath whether you want to or not? ”
“Just because I’m a Prime doesn’t mean that I’m above the law!
If I refuse to acknowledge the engagement, then I am breaking the Treaty, which gives every single realm the right to declare war on me.
When I took the throne, I didn’t do it by ignoring the statutes; I just found a way to use them to my advantage. ”
“Then do that here!”
“I’m going to, Silver! I mean, I’m going to try. This only just happened!”
“Really? The Prime of the Forest Realm just waltzed into your throne room to tell you you’re engaged with no preamble at all?”
She shifts uncomfortably. “Well . . . he did send a letter in advance, but—”
I grit my teeth. “When?”
“A week ago?”
“And you didn’t tell me?”
“Mance did try. Remember? She—”
“She tried yesterday. What about all the days before that?”
Poise winces. “We couldn’t agree on how to handle it. And we didn’t want you to worry about it until we knew the full situation. We didn’t think it would be this bad, but—”
“So this is what you’ve been dealing with, all by yourself? I asked you multiple times what was going on, and yet you—”
“Don’t yell at me! I told you I was trying to handle it. And maybe I would have been able to if you hadn’t let him into the palace!”
I must look stricken, because she shakes her head quickly, putting one delicate hand on my shoulder. “I didn’t mean that. I’m sorry. I don’t blame you for this.”
But it’s too late to take the words back. They sink into me, like the wreckage of my home sank into the mud of the Outskirts.
Because she’s right.
This is my fault.
“Silver—” she says, but I pull away from her, and her hand drops into the yawning space between us.
Because it’s not just the fact that I let him in. Yes, I did that, and everything that happened afterward is entirely on me. I’ll own that. I’m used to that.
But the fact that she never talked to me about this hurts.
She tried to, maybe, at the very last minute, but more because she didn’t want me to feel left out than because she actually wanted to lean on me.
It fully hits me that she hasn’t leaned on me in months, shouldering everything about being a Prime all on her own.
Like she said, she wanted to be the one to handle this.
And I don’t even blame her. It’s not like I have any power in this situation.
Reltas is a Prime. He may be scum, but he knows who he is and what he’s worth.
He and Mance are on the same level, playing the same game.
If they did get married, no one would blink.
People would look at them and think that they make sense.
Who am I? What am I even doing here? I was going to declare my love for her? It’s pathetic. Like a gnat claiming to love the stars.
What is my handful of flowers compared to the giant rock on her finger? What is my heart compared to an alliance with another realm?
“I need a minute,” I say.
Her eyes flick down, which is Poise’s version of flinching. “I leave for the Forest Realm tomorrow. Can we talk more when I get back?”
I scoff, unable to stop myself.
When she gets back. She’s not even inviting me to come with. And why would she? I clearly add nothing. Standing in the Outskirts, I was so certain that my place was by her side, no matter what else was going on.
But I guess she doesn’t feel the same way.
I turn on my heel and stalk into the hallway without even deigning to respond.
And she doesn’t call after me, either.
The only thing that splits the silence is the sound of the giant double doors slamming shut behind me.