23. Quinn
quinn
. . .
I knew joining a band would be time-consuming. What I hadn’t banked on was being so tired at the end of the day, which in band life, is the early hours of the next morning, resulting in me neglecting the important things in life. For instance, I’d really like to take a shower, at least one that lasted longer than five minutes. Shaving would be nice, but instead, I have this nice beard coming in. I’ve never been a fan of them but removing it any time in the near future doesn’t seem to be on my to-do list. My mother would like to have lunch, or at least, see me because talking to my sister to get to me is not enough proof that I’m still alive. Calling Nola or responding to one of her text messages would also be nice. I’m sure by now she’s made the assumption that I’m a total douche and wants nothing to do with me, which honestly, isn’t necessarily a bad thing. As much as I like her, starting a relationship while this band is getting off the ground probably isn’t the best idea. Most of my time is going to be tied up with my new “family” and I’m sure Nola has better things to do than to wait for me.
I’d also like to grocery shop, clean my apartment, and sleep. All of which have gone by the wayside.
Right now, it’s circle time, just like we had in kindergarten. It’s actually our daily meeting where Elle encourages us to open up, get to know one another and air our differences so that there’s nothing creating a wedge between any of us. I suppose now is the time to tell Ajay that I’m completely jealous of how good he is on the drums and my dad dotes on him or tell Elle that I think she’s turning into a massive diva.
Nope. Instead, I sit here and keep those thoughts to myself because they’ll make me look petty and childish. I’m already struggling with this envy thing that I have with Ajay and my father, and I don’t want to drag the rest of the band into it. Honestly, it’s not something that can be fixed by anyone but myself. I don’t want my dad to stop mentoring Ajay, and I definitely don’t want to hurt Elle’s band.
That’s all we are right now, Elle’s band or this band she’s put together. We haven’t decided on a name. Hendrix, who I have grown to love, suggested we have “experience” at the end of whatever we decide on. Elle vetoed it, saying we’re not a Jimi cover band. The dude looked pretty dejected, but I agree with my sister.
“Quinn, do you have any ideas on a band name?” Elle asks.
I shake my head. “Sorry, I don’t.” It’s one of the reasons why being a solo artist is easy. I don’t need a band name. I can just be Quinn James and I’m good to go, or I could be Quinn, like Prince or Bono, although, both of those men were part of a band.
Elle sighs and runs her hand through her hair. She’s doing that a lot lately, tugging and pulling on her hair. This band is stressing her out, and I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not. I know she wants us to be successful, but at what cost? The gig coming up at the Roxy is huge. We’re opening for our dad’s band and that in itself, is monumental. Everyone we know will be there, and while my sisters and I are used to being in the background when they play, this will be different.
Our no named band is expected to mingle, to visit with the record executives and the media. Elle demands it. She wants us to be personable, and at the ready. I get it. My sister doesn’t want us to be one of those bands that takes years to get off the ground. That’s how much faith she has in us.
“Distraction,” Ajay blurts out. Elle turns sharply to him.
“Keep going,” she says. “Because I like that, but that’s not it.” She stands and starts pacing. Her hands are clasped, then they’re in her hair again, and then she’s biting her finger. I’ve never seen her like this. This focused and determined.
“Envy,” Dana says, but Elle shakes her head.
“Easy?” Keane asks.
“No, that’s not it. There’s a word I’m thinking of, but?—”
“Sinful,” Hendrix blurts out. Elle’s head pops up and she narrows in on him. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think my sister just marked her prey.
“What did you say?” she asks.
“Sinful. Sinful Distraction,” he says again.
“Why? What’s your reasoning?” Elle walks toward Hendrix. The rest of us lean closer, waiting to hear what he has to say. He looks scared. I don’t blame him one bit, but my sister is harmless… for the most part.
Hendrix looks around and from where I’m sitting, I think he’s looking at Dana. “She’s my distraction,” he says, pointing at her. “She’s sinful in ways no one will ever know about.”
“Until I start dating again.”
“God, no, woman!” Hendrix hangs his head and covers his ears.
I look over at Dana. She’s looking at her fingernails and ignoring Hendrix’s antics. He really must be in love with her, after all these years.
“Sinful Distraction. Sinful Distraction,” Elle continues to say this over and over while she walks around the room. We all watch her, turning on our stools, waiting for the light bulb moment. “I like it.” She nods. “No, I love it. It’s perfect.”
“Looks like we have a band name,” I say, trying to be helpful. “We’ll need a killer logo.”
“You’re right. I’ll get the team on it.”
“We have a team?” I question.
“Of course. Ben’s great with graphics. He has your website all set up, he’s just waiting for the name. This is perfect. I need to go make some phone calls. You practice. The Roxy is going to eat you alive if you’re not perfect. Sinful Distraction, I love it,” she says as she walks out of the studio.
Not a second later, the intercom comes on. “You guys ready?” Tyler asks. He doesn’t wait for a response. We get up and take our spots. We have to nail one more song for our demo, which Elle wants to have ready for our gig.
My dad, along with my uncles and my bandmates are setting up for tonight’s gig. 4225 West is helping Sinful Distraction. I call it more like babysitting or trying to have their hand in our cookie jar. I know they mean well, but I’m subjected to more of my dad and Ajay talking shop than I care to listen to.
“How are things?” Liam asks.
“Fine, I guess.”
“Still okay with your decision?”
I shrug. I’m not sure that I am. I miss my life, the one I was trying to have. Yes, it was boring, but it was perfect for me. “You didn’t mention how stressful and busy I’d be. I can’t remember the last time I ate.”
“I remember those days. It’s important that you take care of yourself. A healthy body is a healthy mind. You don’t want to cloud it with drugs.”
“I’m not going to turn to drugs,” I tell my uncle. He and my father have always tried to keep a clean image, but I know there was a time when they faltered early in their career. Liam doesn’t talk about it, but he’s always been on us while growing up, about how messed up we can become once we start. I’m high on life as far as I’m concerned.
Keane comes over with JD in tow. “Keane, this is Liam Page.”
“It’s so nice to meet you,” he says, shaking Liam’s hand.
“You too. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
“You have?”
Liam nods. “Elle’s my niece. My band has sort of been guiding her along the way. I hear you have a daughter.”
“I do, she’s in the back room.”
“Great, my daughter, she’s a bit older, but she’ll be here in a few minutes with her mom, will keep her company.”
“Aunt Josie’s coming?” I ask.
“And my missus and Eden,” JD adds.
“The whole family, huh?”
Liam and JD laugh. “Do you honestly think any of them would miss your big debut with a band?” Liam asks.
“No,” I say, shaking my head. “I know they wouldn’t, I just hoped they would.”
“Would what?” my dad asks as he joins us. Ajay is standing next to him. I try to ignore the bitterness I’m feeling. Having my dad here is great for the band, and Ajay’s good. He’s really good. I need to get over this. Maybe he and I need to go out and have some beers, shoot some pool and just be bros or something. Anything I can do to not want to rip his head off.
“Liam was just telling Keane that Betty Paige will be here later, so she can sit with his daughter and I was saying how surprised I am that everyone’s coming.”
My dad’s hand rests on my shoulder. Somehow, this feels reassuring, as if I needed him to acknowledge me. Truth is, I did. “Your mom wouldn’t miss this for the world, son.”
A ball size knot forms in my throat. I don’t know why his words affect me so much, but they do, and I needed to hear them.
“You’re lucky you have such a supportive family,” Ajay adds. “When I left home my mother moved away and didn’t tell me until she needed to borrow some money.”
“Parents,” Liam says. My dad and I laugh because we know all too well what his father is like. His mom though, she’s pretty amazing and I like her. She’s especially crazy at Noah’s games.
“Well, my family’s big enough to share.” I’m shocked by my words but stick to them. “My mom will likely adopt you, my aunts will cater to your every need, and the sister you haven’t met yet, well she’ll make you look foolish if you try to talk sports with her, so I would avoid that if at all possible. Either way, family is what you make it, right Liam?” I say the words that he said to me not so long ago.
Liam smiles. I can see it in his eyes that he’s proud. “That’s right.”
“How long have you known Quinn?” Ajay asks.
“Well, that would be from the time he was like a day or two old.” Liam looks at my dad, who nods. “So, all his life.”
“Lucky guy, growing up with these two.”
“Hey mate, what about me? What am I, chopped liver?”
Ajay holds up his hands, shaking his head and laughing. “No, not at all. I misspoke. I meant three. It’s like Quinn was the baby from that movie, Three Men and a Baby .”
JD finds this extremely funny. He’s bent over and slapping his knee, while my dad and Liam look on. I’m not sure if I have a reply, but I guess from an outsider’s point of view, that was totally me. A band raised me, and of course, my grandma and Aunt Yvie helped.
“Why’s everyone sitting around?” Elle asks as she enters the venue. Her hair is in a bun and her glasses are on. Ben is standing next to her, staring at her, completely oblivious that she’s working. I have no doubt some librarian fantasy of his is playing out in his head and she’s none the wiser.
“We’re getting to know each other,” Dad says. Elle cocks her eyebrow at him in what seems like a challenge, but Dad holds strong. He’s never put up with her attitude before and I can’t imagine he’s going to start now.
“Well, chat later, the doors are about to open and the last thing I want is for the gaggle of Liam Page fans to rush the stage and hurt him. I’d rather get paid for tonight and not have to cover my uncle’s medical expenses.”
“I can take care of myself, Elle,” Liam says, puffing out his chest. She waves him off and pulls the puppy dog Ben behind her. It’s a good thing his tongue is in his mouth or I might make barking sounds at him.
“She’s right. Let’s pick up so the curtains can close, and we can get this show on the road,” Liam barks orders and everyone moves. The 4225 West road crew works quickly, getting the instruments organized while my band gathers in the corner.
“I can’t thank each and every one of you for agreeing to be a part of this madness. I know what you’re sacrificing and believe me, I appreciate it,” Dana says, wiping away some tears. “We haven’t even played live yet, and I already know tonight’s going to be amazing.”
“I love you,” Hendrix says, and she rolls her eyes.
“I hope we don’t let you down,” I tell her. I look at the rest of the group and smile. “We just need to go out there and be the best.”
“We’re opening for your dad’s band, doesn’t that freak you out?” Ajay asks.
I shake my head. “Not in the slightest. I think it’s an honor that they’d do this for us.”
“Yeah, it is,” Keane adds.
“Liam Page is a god,” Dana says. I cringe, but it’s not the first time I’ve heard that.
“Just remember, he’s married and my aunt… well, she’s nice on the outside, but vicious when it comes to my uncle.”
Dana gives me a two-finger salute and turns to leave the stage with us following behind her. As soon as we’re in our dressing room, I’m tackle hugged by a fierce teenager. Paige has her arms wrapped around my waist in a vise grip.
“Are you trying to break me, Paige?”
“No, but I’ve missed you, Quinn.” She finally lets go and looks up at me. I remember the day she was born. It was a crazy afternoon, that’s for sure.
“Everyone, this is Betty Paige, Liam’s little girl.”
“I’m not little,” she says.
“I know, but to me, you are. And I’ll make sure every guy knows that.”
Paige scoffs. “You’re just like Noah.”
“Ha,” I tell her. “He’ll be worse. Come here, I want to introduce you to my new friend.” I take Paige by the hand and walk over to the sofa where Chandler is sitting with her iPad. She looks up as I approach. “Hey, Chandler I want you to meet Paige. She’s going to chill with you back here while we do our thing.”
“Okay,” she says rather meekly.
Paige lets go of my hand, not that she needed to hold it to begin with, but I’m willing to take the effort for as long as possible. I know Noah isn’t happy about his baby sister being a teenager, and I can easily say, I don’t like it much either. She sits down and cozies right up to Chandler.
“What are you doing?”
“Watching a movie.”
“May I watch with you?” Chandler nods and slides the iPad to the middle. “Oh, let me grab my extender, this way we can both listen.” Paige gets up, grabs her bag and comes back. She plugs in her dual adapter and her headphones and starts laughing immediately.
“Thank you,” Keane says beside me.
“For what?”
“For this.” He points to the two girls. “She hates being here and she misses her mom. I’m trying, but this is how I make ends meet.”
“I was her once. I grew up on the road, so I get it. Paige does too. Don’t worry, Keane. As soon as my mom and aunts get here, Chandler will be doted on.”
“Thanks, man. I owe you one.”
“No, you don’t because we’re family now.”
I’m finally starting to see what my uncle was talking about when he said the band becomes your family. I see so much of myself in Chandler, tucked in the corner all by myself. I would’ve loved to have Noah or a friend on the bus or sitting next to me in the dressing room, while I waited for my dad. I don’t know if this is me giving back or what, but I’m determined to make sure Chandler doesn’t live a lonely existence while her dad is playing with us.