Chapter 12
twelve
. . .
S pring morphs into summer and right before my eyes, Amelie’s almost done with school. She splits her time between my apartment and her mother’s house, and one night during the week, either I go over there for dinner or Aubrey comes over here for family dinner. I think it’s important to show Amelie that her parents are still there for her, regardless of our marital situation.
Aubrey and I are cordial. I don’t ask about her day, and she doesn’t ask about mine. We don’t really talk unless it’s about the kids because there isn’t anything to talk about. She still hasn’t told the kids she’s getting married, not that she’s told me either, but at some point, she may want to drop the bomb.
I’ve asked to meet the new boyfriend a few times, but Aubrey never commits to anything. Deep down, I worry. As a father, I want to know who is going to be around my kids. Raising them when I’m not around. Now I know how Liam felt when he came back and saw I was raising Noah. We weren’t exactly friends in high school, and it must have been a kick in the gut to see his rival playing father figure. I get it now. I don’t want a stranger raising my kids either, simply because they’re not me . Honestly, I’d like to sit down, see where he stands on some important issues, and go from there. I don’t expect us to like each other. Hell, I don’t hate him like I should mostly because I have a feeling Aubrey didn’t tell him she’s married. Every time I think about what’s happened, it makes me wonder what else she’s hidden from me.
It's sad to think my marriage ended on lies. Lies upon lies. I can’t trust a damn thing that comes out of her mouth. Shortly after our first meeting with the mediator, she told me the house needed a new dishwasher, dishes, towels, really trivial things. Aubrey said because Amelie used them, I needed to buy them. At first, I thought I was going to be on the hook, because yes, Amelie does use those things, but my attorney said no. The landlord could cover the cost of the new dishwasher, if they chose, but Aubrey had to fork over her share as well.
For a while I expected things to get messy, but thankfully they haven’t. When Amelie’s here, we have a great routine. Talisa has started coming over during the week. She cleans, does the laundry, and makes sure the refrigerator is stocked. At times, she cooks, which I fully appreciate. Her food alone is worth what I pay her.
Each day, I go to work, treat my patients with a smile, and count the days until I head back to Beaumont. Mack insists that I stay here for Amelie, but I’m not sure. Besides the fact that my son is living with friends, I miss my practice, my friends, the life I had in Beaumont. Amelie knows I want to leave, but when she’s here, we don’t talk about it. When all of this started, I said I’d come and get them settled. Somehow Aubrey weaseled more time out of me. I could’ve told her no, but I wasn’t staying for her.
When I walk into the apartment after work, the smell of curry wafts over me. I inhale, loving the scent. I’ve decided it’s my new favorite cuisine and all others pair in comparison.
“Mr. Nick.” Talisa comes around the corner, wiping her hand on her towel. “Good evening.”
“Good evening, Talisa. Dinner smells amazing.”
“Soon,” she told him. “Miss Amelie is in her room.”
I knock on the door and then open it. She’s on her bed, with her headphones on, reading a book. I know, without asking, she has music playing. How her mind can do two things at once is beyond me.
Tapping her on the shoulder, I wait for her to remove the device. “Hey, Daddy.”
“How was your day?”
She shrugs. “It’s boring sometimes.”
Amelie started complaining the work was too easy. Aubrey and I met with the school and asked for Amelie to have the next level of course study, which also turned out to be too easy after a couple of weeks.
“I’m sorry.” I sit on the edge of her bed and sigh. “Not sure what I can do to help.”
“It’s okay. I just get bored.”
“And boredom leads to trouble?”
She nods.
“Did you get into trouble?”
Amelie shakes her head. “Not yet.”
It takes everything in me not to roll my eyes. “Let’s try and stay out of trouble then. Come on, let’s eat and then we’re calling Mack.”
After Amelie and I do the dishes—it’s not something I expect Talisa to do—we sit down and call Mack. When he answers, he’s smiling big and bright.
“Hey guys,” he says. He looks like he’s been running around.
“What’s going on?”
Mack turns his screen around and shows us a dog, and then he’s back facing us. “This is Beau,” he tells us. “He’s Ben and Elle’s puppy. I’m taking care of him and helping train him.”
“He’s soooooo cute,” Amelie says. “I love his name.”
“Yeah, he’s the sweetest.”
“How’s Ben?” Liam or Josie keeps me up to date on the happenings in town. I was shocked and saddened to find out Ben had cancer. He’s so young and you never think of people his age going through something like this.
“Uh, he’s in the hospital,” Mack says. “I don’t know all the details because I’m just a kid, but he collapsed the other day when he was buying the puppy. I was there and called for an ambulance. Elle’s paying me to train him. I pick him up from her studio every day after school.”
“You’re a good kid, Mack.”
“Thanks, Dad. Uh, when are you coming home? I really miss you.”
My heart sinks to the pit of my stomach. I need a clone because that’s the only option for me so I can be in two places at once. My son deserves to be with his parents, but not at the expense of his future. If he were here, he’d be somewhere in boarding school, and we’d have the same conversation.”
“I miss you too,” I tell him.
“Do you miss me?” Amelie asks him.
“I do, but your friends really miss you,” he tells her. “I see them a lot and they ask about you and want to know why you don’t call them. I tell them the time difference is sort of crappy.”
“I have new friends,” she tells Mack, which irritates me. Her tone reminds me of Aubrey, and I don’t like it.
“Why don’t you go take your shower,” I tell her. She waves bye to Mack and heads toward the bathroom. “About me coming home. I have to wait for a few things to become final here and then I’ll be back. Do you want to come here for the summer? I know your mom misses you.”
“Does she?” he asks. “She never calls. I talk to you every day.”
“I’m sorry, bud.”
Mack shrugs. “Liam said he’d take me to look at some colleges this summer. Besides, I’m mad at mom.”
Me too.
“She didn’t need to go back there. If she wanted a job she could’ve worked here.”
“I know. But this is where she grew up and her parents are here.”
“Yeah, the grandparents that never call. I wonder where she learned that habit from.”
I don’t say anything. He’s entitled to be angry with his mother and grandparents. Hell, I am. They don’t call Amelie either and when they were in town, she was here. Aubrey never thought to switch weeks. When I asked her about it, she didn’t see what the big deal was. Sometimes it’s hard to understand why people are different. Being a grandparent is supposed to be the highlight of your life, your achievement for raising your own kids. My parents adore the kids and are extremely pissed off at me for allowing Amelie to move here. If only it was that easy. I get that they’re angry. So am I. But being stuck between a rock and a hard place isn’t fun either.
“How are your grades?” I ask, trying to change the subject, even though I know he’s a straight A student.
“Good. I’m ready for school to be over.”
“I used to feel the same way. And then summer wasn’t ever long enough.”
“Nope.” The puppy comes into view, kissing Mack’s face.
“He’s really cute.”
“If you were here, I’d ask if we could get a dog.”
“Yeah, we kind of talked about it for a bit but never really did anything about it. I guess in hindsight that’s a good thing.”
“I guess. I gotta go. I told Mr. Powell I’d mow the lawn and I still need to work on some commands with this fluff ball. Say hi to your Uncle Nick,” Mack says in a baby voice. “Noah’s been here a lot too.”
“That’s good. Are you spending a lot of time with him?”
Mack nods. “He did say I could go to his place for the summer if I wanted. He said his dad can be kind of annoying, but I don’t think he is. Liam’s helped me a lot.”
“That’s good. I’m happy.”
“Yeah, all right. Love ya, Dad.”
“Love ya too, bud.” Only Mack doesn’t hear me because he’s ended the call.
I sit there and stew until Amelie’s out of the shower. After tucking her in, I head for the kitchen and grab a beer from the refrigerator. When I first moved out, I made sure to keep any alcohol out of the house, out of fear Aubrey would use it against me. At this point, I don’t care. And it’s not like Amelie is awake to tell her mother, and I’m definitely not getting black out drunk.
After a couple of swigs, I pick up the phone and call Aubrey. She picks up on the third ring, sounding out of breath. Gee can’t imagine what she’s doing.
“Busy?”
“No,” she says, but I can tell she’s lying.
“Why aren’t you calling Mack?”
“Excuse me?”
“I didn’t stumble over my words, Aubrey. Mack says you haven’t spoken in a while, what gives?”
“I text him.”
“That’s not the same. He needs to see your face, hear your voice.”
“And he would if you didn’t allow him to stay in Beaumont.”
“Do you really want to talk about why we’re not in Beaumont?”
Silence.
“Yeah, I didn’t think so.”
“I feel like you’re trying to scold me or something, Nick. I’m sorry I’m not as perfect as you when it comes to our son.”
“Stop,” I tell her. “Stop with the gaslighting. Just call your son. Let him know you’re okay, that you’re happy. Let him see your life here so he understands why you made this decision without thinking about him.”
“That’s not fair, Nick, and you know it. You’re turning him against me.”
“I’m not, Aubrey. We rarely talk about you. If you think he’s distant, it’s because you’re not putting in the effort with him.”
“Well, the effort goes both ways.”
“Not when you’re sixteen and you're navigating life without your parents, knowing they’re going through a divorce. Call your son, Aubrey.” I hang up, wondering if I’ve done the right thing. It would be so easy to push this all under the rug, to not encourage her to reach out to him. But I can’t do that to Mack. He and Amelie are innocent in all of this. They didn’t ask their parents to get a divorce or to move away. Adults making rash decisions and not fully thinking about the ramifications did. I get that Aubrey wants to live where she grew up. It makes sense. And I understand she wants her children or at least one of them with her. I’d want the same, but not at the expense of their happiness.
I finish the beer, lock up, and turn off the lights. In bed, I stare at the ceiling, still waiting for it to fall on me some night. Hopefully, I hear it start to crumble before that happens. Who knows what’s up there, living and breeding. The thought makes me shudder.