Chapter 30
After her fainting spell, Mary refused to leave her bedroom for the next two days and spent much of the time alone, often weeping.
Lizzy and Darcy were confused and frustrated, unable to think of a way to help her.
They even called in a physician, but he reported he could find nothing physically wrong.
“It just seems very odd that Mary is taking this so to heart,” Lizzy said one evening as she and her husband settled into bed.
“Indeed, I should imagine she would be crowing about her success in discovering Mrs. Withers’s true colors before it was too late, yet she spends hours weeping as if deeply sad and refuses to speak to me about it further. ”
“Well, she must also feel betrayed by Mrs. Withers, clearly. After all, the two had become quite close, and your middle sister never has had many intimate friends, you know. For her to discover that she was just a pawn in a game to secure your father’s affections must have wounded her terribly.”
Lizzy nodded thoughtfully. “Yes, you are right, that is likely the key issue here. But the question remains, how do we help her?”
“All broken hearts heal in time, Lizzy. We shall just give her love and attention, and eventually, things will come around right.”
“In the meantime, I should write to Papa and let him know we are glad he did not enter into an engagement with that Mrs. Withers. I did write that Mary had arrived safely, but I was reluctant to say anything about the recent events until I heard more details from my sister. But it is clear she is not going to say more—at least not to me.” She leaned over to blow out the candle on the nightstand.
“Perhaps once I write to Papa, I shall have a clearer idea of how to help her.”
***
The next afternoon, Mary sat in her room, staring blankly out the window when she heard a knock at her door. Although she did not wish for any company, she called out, “Come in.” Perhaps it was just a maid bringing tea.
Instead, Georgiana entered, carrying Lavinia Jane. She smiled shyly at Mary and held the baby up.
“Miss Lavinia Jane is most displeased her auntie Mary has not been to the nursery to visit her yet on this visit,” she said in a teasing voice.
“She insisted I bring her to you.” Georgiana walked over and set the baby firmly in Mary’s lap.
“She has grown quite a bit since you were last here, has she not?” she asked as she pulled a chair over to the window seat.
“Indeed,” Mary murmured, offering a finger for her niece to grab.
Lavinia promptly pulled it into her mouth, making Mary smile.
She noted Lavinia was improving in looks.
The pinched, angry face she recalled from before was gone, having filled out nicely.
In fact, her overall appearance was plumper and healthy looking, and—heavens!
—was that a dimple in her right cheek? It seemed her niece would be comely, after all.
“Are you feeling better, Mary?” Georgiana asked gently. “We are all dreadfully worried about your distress over the situation at Longbourn.”
“My heart is still so heavy, Georgiana,” Mary replied in a faltering voice.
“Well, of course—to learn that someone you considered a bosom friend should betray not only your father but you as well must be exceedingly painful. But can you not rejoice even a little in the fact that you made this discovery in time? Imagine the agony if the marriage had gone ahead only for your dear Papa to learn the truth too late. Then he would be trapped.”
“The truth…” Mary bit her lip and squeezed her eyes shut. “The truth is so painful. But so are the lies.”
Georgiana cocked her head. “What lies do you speak of? Do you mean those by Mrs. With—”
Mary broke in with a small sob. “I have always prided myself on being honest. I wish to always tell the truth.”
“Well, and so you have—to the betterment of the situation despite this initial sorrow that accompanies it. You will feel differently in time I expect.”
“I shall never forgive myself for ruining Papa’s chance at happiness.” Mary shook her head, then handed Lavinia back to Georgiana. “Will you please excuse me? I wish to lie down. I feel a headache coming on.”
“Of course. But please say that I can persuade you to come downstairs soon to join me in some duets on the pianoforte. I have purchased new music I have been most eager to try, and your sister refuses to attempt them. However, I know you would be able to play them with me.”
“Perhaps,” Mary whispered, studying her hands in her lap.
After waiting another moment, Georgiana squeezed Mary’s arm, shifted her niece onto her hip, and quietly slipped out of the room.
After returning Lavinia to the nursery, Georgiana went to her own room to think on her conversation with Mary.
Curious. Why does Mary say she cannot forgive herself?
She has saved her father from a probable fortune hunter and a most imprudent marriage.
That should make her feel pride—not shame.
Unless there is more to the story. Could there be something Mary is not telling us?
What could she have done that she thinks is so unforgivable?