Chapter 36
THIRTY-SIX
ZACH brADLEY LOVES ME
“Oh, baby, you should have called me!”
I pinch the bridge of my nose, wishing I hadn’t picked up the phone. “Pecan, huh?”
“Of course! Dammit, Denny, why didn’t you tell me? I shouldn’t have had to hear about this from Helmie!”
Staring at my feet, I mutter, “I didn’t want to talk about it. It only happened this afternoon and I’m already sick of the subject.”
“That makes complete sense,” she soothes, clucking her tongue. The sympathy in her voice clogs my throat with emotion.
Maybe that’s why I didn’t want to talk to her about this.
I have to be strong. I need to put on a brave face. I had that meltdown in the library but now, I have to rise above and fix this.
There’s no rising above anything when your mom calls and she’s being all sympathetic and—
I sniffle. “It really sucks, Mom.”
“Those bastards.”
“Singular.”
“I doubt that very much,” she blusters. “Those morons always function in pairs. Just wait until your father hears about this. He’ll be furious too.”
Even as my brow furrows at the wording, I mumble, “Furious because he’ll be embarrassed his kid was humiliated at his alma mater.”
She hesitates. Just long enough that I know she’s thinking the same thing. “Sweetheart, if that’s true, then…” Her words falter. “I’m sorry I didn’t divorce him sooner.”
My fingers squish my Magic 8 Ball cushion. “You didn’t want to divorce him at all.”
“Have a daughter, they said. Girl talk will rock, they said. What they didn’t say is daughters hand you your ass and tell you to enjoy it.”
My lips quirk into a weak grin. “I’m right, aren’t I?”
“Yes. But that doesn’t mean I can’t see I was an idiot. This isn’t about me though. None of this is. What’s going on with Zach? I can’t imagine he took it well.”
“The guy who did it… he was playing in tonight’s game.”
“That was someone’s moronic decision.”
“Yup. They lost.”
“I just bet they did.” Glee creeps into her voice. “I knew I liked that boy.”
“Oh, hush. You love him as much as you love Pecan.”
“As true as that may be, you know precisely what I’m talking about.”
Still anxious, I pluck at the hem of his jersey. “I do.”
“Where are you? Waiting at the rink for him?”
“No. I got a ride home. There were puck bunnies hovering. If I heard one more oink tonight, I’d lose my shit.”
“Who could blame you?” she expresses. “Sweetie, I’m so sorry.”
“Thanks, Mom,” I warble, wishing I were home so she could hug me.
“I love you, baby. You know that, right?”
“Yeah, I do. I love you too.”
“I-I have a plan, Denny.”
I snag an abandoned glass of water from the coffee table. “For what?”
“It doesn’t matter now. But… and I know this is terrible timing, I wanted you to be the first to hear the news. Franklin proposed and I said yes.”
It’s not my fault I chose that moment to have a drink. When it sprays the coffee table, I can’t even chide myself for a shitty Pecan impression.
Instead, I croak out, “You’re marrying him?!”
“He has connections in New York, sweetie. Maybe we can sue these dumb kids for… I don’t know. Something.”
“You’re not marrying him for free legal advice, are you?”
“He’s a good man and we’ll be safe.”
“Safe from? What were we in danger from?!”
“Life.” The answer’s flat. But all the more powerful for it.
“Mom, you do want to marry this guy, right? I mean, I haven’t even met him!”
“The boys told me you didn’t go to his house for Thanksgiving.”
“No. I didn’t want to see Francesca or him.”
She chuckles. “Good girl.”
“I’m being a bitch.”
“She slept with your father while knowing he was married with children. She deserves no pity.”
“You cheated too.”
“Only after he did. And yes, I’m well aware that doesn’t make it right, but I’d have stayed true if not for him… So, Franklin and I, we went to Vegas over the Thanksgiving break—”
Something in her tone has me shrieking, “Wait. You said he proposed but… you got married?!”
She giggles. It sounds oddly lighthearted and… Jesus. Happy.
“Yes, it was a spur of the moment thing. I loved it! It was tacky but so much fun.”
That dopey tone of hers has me wincing. “Whenever the boys describe him to me, they aren’t that complimentary, Mom.”
She tuts. “They wouldn’t be.”
“Why not?”
“Because when he’s in the house, there’s a break from their marshal rein and he’s in charge. They actually have to do their chores. It’s the first time in years that I didn’t mow the damn lawn myself. They only get their allowance if they put in the work.”
“Should you allow a relative stranger to be setting those kinds of boundaries?”
“Probably not, but he’s not a stranger now, is he?” She doesn’t see me pinch the bridge of my nose in exasperation. “Anyway, it was worth their while. Franklin’s allowances involve bonuses.”
“Bonuses?”
“Yup. Think a service charge for care and attention. Paul got an A in biology—”
“No freakin’ way!”
“Yes!”
“Because Franklin bribed them?”
“Uh-huh. He might actually stop them from being heathens because God knows I can’t get them under control and your father’s no use.
He’s the reason they ran wild with that whole BS about them being future hockey stars.
” She grumbles ‘dipshit.’ “I like Franklin. He’s good to me.
He cares. He doesn’t treat me like a maid or as if I’m getting old and doesn’t make snide comments if I eat dessert. He buys me flowers and is spontaneous.
“He makes me smile, Denver. Is that such a bad thing?”
I slump. “No, Mom, it isn’t. Not at all. I’m happy for you. Really. I just… It seems kinda fast.” So fast I have whiplash!
“Oh, it is, but hell, I signed a prenup. No harm, no foul. Honestly, it’ll be worth it if he can make the boys half-human. I swear they were turning into such entitled assholes and I had no idea how to reverse it.”
“You’re crazy.”
“The best kind of crazy. I meant it, by the way.”
“Which bit in particular?”
“This picture… isn’t it a hate campaign? I’ll talk to Franklin about it.”
Call me petty but I don’t have it in me to say anything other than, “You can always ask.”
“Oh, yay!” she cries. “I was hoping you wouldn’t be a Goody Two-shoes!”
I snort. “Since when has that ever been me?”
“I don’t know. Your morals get in the way of a lot of things.” She clears her throat. “I know, Denny.”
The clink of my glass hitting the coffee table sounds overly loud in the small room. “What do you know, Mom?”
“It’s fine. Between me and you. I certainly won’t be telling your father.”
“Mom, what are you talking about?!”
“You know exactly what I’m talking about. Anyway, I’d best be going. If you need me, I’m here. What happened to you today is terrible, Denny.
“I’m not saying this to rub salt in the wound, just to… I’m here for you. I’m your mother. You need me, call. Nothing’s changed now that Franklin is in the picture, sweetheart.”
I refuse to cry again.
“Thanks, Mom.”
“I love you, Denver. Always. Speak soon.”
“Love you, too. And yeah, will do.”
As I disconnect the call, I have to wonder which of her sisters talked. Fuck. I hoped they’d keep their traps shut at the prospect of someone like me—
“Denny?!”
Zach’s holler has me sitting upright on the couch.
“In here,” I yell.
“Oh, thank fuck. When I got your text saying you were leaving early, I freaked out, and then you didn’t answer.”
“Sorry. Mom called,” I tell him when he pops his head around the door.
His shoulders hunch. “Pecan?”
“Yup. Helmie told Mom.”
“Fuck.”
“No. It’s fine. She… We had a weird conversation, actually. I’m not sure I understood half of what she said, but she got married over Thanksgiving.”
“What?!”
“The lawyer.”
“And she’s only telling you today?!”
“You know how she rolls.” I snicker. “She said he’d keep us safe. Whatever that means.”
“Must be rich.”
“True.”
“Richer than your father.”
“Could be. She said he’s been bribing Logan and Paul into doing their chores.”
Laughing, Zach dumps himself onto the couch next to me. “About time someone corralled those monsters.”
I nod, sighing when he lifts an arm and curves it around me.
Settling into his side, I murmur, “Are those knuckles bruised?”
The hand rubbing my arm pauses. Silence fills the space between us. On the brink of me calling him out, he mutters, “Do you want me to lie to you?”
“What woman ever wants to be lied to?”
“Got Derek kicked off the team. Temporarily, at least.”
I pinch him. “You shouldn’t have done that.”
His hand gathers my ponytail and he uses that to tip my head back. Not roughly, but enough that I can’t evade him without a tug-of-war on my hair.
Now’s not the time to make a mental note of that for when we’re messing around.
“Of course I should have done that. He had no right to take it this far.” He presses a kiss to my temple. “I’m sorry, gorgeous.”
“Please, don’t,” I whisper, snuggling deeper into his side. “Or I’ll cry. That’s the last thing I want.”
He hesitates. “Pecan said Darcy Lovell has a party tomorrow.”
“And?”
“He thinks we should go. Says it’d be like something from one of your movies.”
My immediate horror fades at the suggestion. I hate Darcy Lovell, but the idea definitely has Never Been Kissed merit.
I so feel for Josie Grossie when those jerks egged her.
“What do you t-think?”
This guy—I swear.
Goes and raises hell with his team over me, gets the competitive motherfuckers to lose, potentially ruins his chances in the draft, but then stutters over asking me out to a party.
“I think it sounds like hell but that we should do it.”
His grin beams from him. “You do?”
“Have you missed going to parties?”
“Not particularly. I like going to some, but you don’t hit the NHL by partying like a lunatic. And I already admitted I was drinking too much. Mostly, I use them to keep in with the team.”
“What do you mean?”
“Politics. I don’t want them to think I’m a dick.”
“You are a dick though.”
“Gee, thanks.”
“There’s no shame in that, Zach. Look, as much as I like some of them, they’re playing for funsies.
The game isn’t their future. They’re holding onto it as long as they can before real life and real bills beckon.
Then, when they graduate, they’ll go work for their dads’ hedge funds and boast about the days they played on the ice with the Zach Bradley and Pecan Canard.
“You two are in it for keeps. They’re not. If they want to get drunk and do drugs and party, that’s on them. You have different goals.”
“Doesn’t mean camaraderie on and off the ice isn’t an issue.” He settles back into the couch with a yawn. “Especially at the moment. It’s fine. You’re right. I know you are. That’s why I’ve slowed down. But after tonight’s game… they pulled out all the stops for us.”
A wicked, wicked thought whispers into my fragile confidence. “You’re not not going to parties because you don’t want to be seen with me, right?”
“What?!” He jerks upright, literally launching himself off the damn couch so he can loom over me. “Are you insane?”
“I’ve seen the girls you… well, didn’t date, Zach. They’re not me.”
“No. Exactly. They’re not you. You are what and who I want.” When he drops to his knees in front of me, I swallow, then he rasps, “Jesus, Denny.”
“I won’t be wearing some slinky bit of nothing tomorrow.” I gulp. “I’ll just be—”
“Wear that dress you wore to invite-only night. You know, the one that had me jacking off after you left,” he bursts out. “You’re talking like my main issue recently hasn’t been coming too fast whenever you get your hands on me.
“Look, I’m not saying any of this right because I can’t. But my body has shown you what it feels about yours. I’m lucky that you’re inexperienced or you’d have given me shit about my performance!”
Eyes wide, I mutter, “I would never humiliate you about that.”
“No, but if you were like any other girl, you’d have told your bestie and they’d have spread the word.”
The memory of Addison sharing the deets about his big dick with her friend hits me and I wince.
“See? You know I’m right.” His hand cups my cheek. “Everything about you gets me hard. Everything, D. Have I fucked skinny girls in the past? Yes. But those girls didn’t give a shit about me, like I didn’t give a shit about them. They saw the stats and the name and the hockey stick.”
“The on-ice stretches too. Don’t forget those,” I mumble.
Though he chuckles, he continues, “It was transactional. Nothing about what we have is that. Surely you can see the difference?”
Shyly, I nod. “You really want me to wear that dress tomorrow?”
“Yes. And do you know what we’re going to do?”
He leans into me and whispers a few words in my ear. Words that make me blush. Words that have heat swirling through me when, after the day I’ve had, being in anyway horny is a miracle.
“That can be arranged,” I squeak.
“Good.” His eyes are like molten pools that I want to swim in. “Now, come on. We need to get some rest.”
I let him tug me to my feet, watch as he switches off the TV and the lights, and then sigh as he curves his arm around my shoulders again and guides me upstairs.
When he tucks me into my bed, a part of me is concerned he’s going to leave, but before I can ask him to stay, he’s tossing his shirt on the floor and stripping out of his jeans.
Clambering his bare ass onto the mattress, he immediately hauls me close, sucking up all the space on his half.
I know he thinks I’m the one who has zero requirements for personal space, but he is. And tonight, I definitely don’t have a problem with that.
“I love you, Den. Please tell me you know that?”
“‘Course I do—”
“No. You’re not listening. I’ve always l-loved you. But this is different. This isn’t…” He grunts. “Why am I so shit with words?”
I rest a hand on his chest, dancing my fingertips over his pecs until I find the steady, soothing beat of his heart. “I think you’re perfect with them.”
Nuzzling my nose against his chest, I close my eyes. I know he wants me to say it back. I can feel his hope, but he doesn’t pressure me. He just holds me, closer than close, cocooning me in the safety of his embrace.
I could easily say it back. I’ve loved him what feels like my whole life. But this is different. It’s such a massive step and I—
God, I’m not ready to take such a huge jump. Not yet.
He falls asleep, leaving me to the cacophony of my thoughts.
But I have to smile into the darkness as a nascent truth flutters and unfurls inside me.
Zach Bradley loves me.
“Wow,” I whisper into the darkness.