Chapter 39
Iwas freaking screwed. As I stared at his message, the gravity of what I had just done began to dawn on me. Drunken texts could be excused, and so after turning away advances from every single guy that had come up to me at the bar with Mandy, I had decided to whip out my phone to discourage further approaches or hopes of conversation. And as a result, I had dialed up my boss’s contact information and decided to fake drunk text him but sent him the message.
I had also done it so stupidly that he was now worried about my safety, and now I had to share my location. I was so close to panicking, and when I turned to Mandy, she immediately noticed the frightened look on my face. She was in a booth with her boyfriend and a couple of other men, but instantly she got up and found her way over.
I didn”t speak until she was seated next to me, and then I handed her the phone. Eyeing me curiously, she took it, and then she began to read. Eventually, and after noting the name on top, her mouth fell open.
“You fake drunk texted your boss?”
I was startled at her tone and couldn’t help but turn around.
“No, you weren’t loud enough,” I told her. “Maybe I should get you a microphone so you can scream into it.”
“I”m sorry,” she apologized, immensely amused.
“He mentioned my name,” she said. “He”s asking for me.”
“So that he can check if I’m okay.”
“Then give him my number,” she replied. “Or respond through your phone. Tell him you”re fine and that I can vouch for it. Should I talk to him?”
I wanted to bury my head in the sand out of frustration.
“You’ve obviously forgotten the part where I said that this is a fake drunk call?”
Chuckling, she read through the messages and then she looked at me.
“You like him?” Her voice lowered. I would have denied with all my heart, but how could I? I had literally drunk texted him. That was insane!
Still, I couldn”t stop thinking about being around my boss.
“Want to hear my theory from earlier?” she asked, and I shook my head.
“Absolutely not.”
She smiled and then read the message again.
“What do you want me to do?”
I thought about it, realizing just how once again I was putting myself in absolute trouble.
“Call him,” I told her. “Tell him I’m fine and just a little tipsy, and you”re here so you’ll be going home with me soon.”
“Alright,” she said and took the phone number from me.
I wanted her to put it on speaker, but I had already been crazy enough for one day, so I simply got up and headed to the bathroom, trusting her to do what needed to be done so that I could head home.
A few minutes later, I had just flushed the toilet in the stall when she called out for me.
“Hannah? Hannah?”
At the panic in her tone, I got up to meet her.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
She stared at me wide-eyed and in shock, and truly, I became afraid.
“What did you do?”
“Absolutely nothing,” she replied.
“I called and the first thing he asked for was your location. I wanted to explain to him that you were fine and that you would get home safely, but he didn’t respond. Instead, he hung up. I - I think he”s coming all the way here.”
“Fuck!” I swore, and she nodded.
“Fuck, indeed.”
“So, how are we going to handle it?”
“How else?” I nearly yelled, my blood pressure shooting up. “I now have to act as if I was actually drunk.”
“Yikes,” she said. “You’re a terrible actress and a worse liar. How are you going to pull it off?”
She sounded concerned. However, when I turned to watch her sipping on her drink, I couldn”t miss the excitement and anticipation in her eyes.
Suddenly, there was a collective roar from a corner of the bar, and it unsettled me so much that my heart nearly left my chest.
“Wow,” she said as she looked at my hand against my breasts. “If I were a guy, I would drive all the way here just to see how you’re doing. Hell, I”m your friend, and I want to drive all the way here to check how you’re doing.”
At these completely nonsensical words, I gave her a look, and she burst out laughing.
“Stop moving around,” she said. “All the boys in this bar can”t look away from your boobs. Hell, even I want to taste them.”
“Come on then,” I dared her. “Taste them.”
She narrowed her eyes at me, her entire being bubbling in amusement.
She looked around then and wisely only took a sip of her drink.
“You’re lucky,” she said. “I don’t want to start a stampede with all the boys here begging for their turn.”
She wasn”t willing or able to be helpful, so I instead turned around and buried my head in my arms.
Groaning aloud, I wondered what I was going to do.
“First things first,” she said as though reading my mind. “You need to smell drunk, and so far you”ve been drinking cranberry vodka all night so that’s absolutely not going to do. What you need is actual liquor. Brandy, rum, tequila? Sammy?”
With a loud tap against the bar”s surface, she called out to the friendly uniformed bartender, and he soon arrived before us.
“We need something that’ll make her smell like she”s drunk within the next five minutes.”
“Oh?” he said, his eyes automatically going down to my boobs. I couldn”t even be mad at this because by dressing this way, I had unquestionably been asking for this attention.
“Are you trying to entice someone?” Sammy asked. “Because you didn’t need any alcohol to do that, trust me.”
His eyes went down to my boobs once again, and I nearly rolled my eyes.
“I”m not trying to entice someone. I”m trying to save my ass.”
“Here?” she laughed. “Honey, the only way you can save your ass here is by leaving. The boys have left you alone so far because the game is on. It ends in twenty minutes. After then, you’re going to be devoured like a carcass.”
Now this made me absolutely terrified, so I turned to Mandy, who was wide-eyed and suspiciously drunk because she seemed to be having the time of her life at my expense.
“Will rum do it? What”s the worst?”
“How about a combination, but still light enough for you? I mean, I”m assuming you don”t want to get drunk, right?”
“I absolutely do not want to get drunk,” I replied, and he nodded.
“A Long Island iced tea it is.”
“Long Island,” Mandy nodded. “That’s not a bad choice. But drink it slowly, make sure it really becomes the taste of your mouth.”
“And how the heck am I supposed to do that?” I asked, returning my attention to my phone to check if he was pinging me something along the lines of if he was actually here. Or perhaps Mandy had heard him wrong, and he wasn’t actually coming. Truly, the last thing I wanted was for him to come to try to find me but at the thought that he might not come, I couldn”t help but be disappointed as well.
“I still can’t believe I”m seeing the day,” Mandy said as she watched me fidget with my phone and put it away.
“What day?” I snapped, destabilized and anxious all in one.
“The day where you actually like someone. You”ve had such high standards, or at some point, I was sure you’d just completely lose interest in men altogether, but here we are. I am actually getting to witness you have the hots for your multi-millionaire lawyer boss, and I am enjoying every second of it.”
“Billionaire,” I corrected.
“What?” she asked in disbelief.
“He”s a billionaire, not a millionaire.”
“That’s absolutely ridiculous,” she said. “I know New York City lawyers earn exorbitant amounts, but billions?”
“He owns investments in his clients” companies. Most of them he helped get out from very dire financial lawsuits and all, and so in exchange, rather than payment, he was given a piece of their companies. Some he invested in.”
“Goddamn it. Smart bastard.”
“Yeah,” I replied, and just then, a message came to my phone. At the conversation with Mandy, I had felt myself begin to realize, but now this was absolutely not the case as I stared down at the notification on my phone.
“I’m here,” it said. “Is the name of the bar Sandals?”
I stared down at the message, shocked out of my mind, and then I called out to the bartender.
“Where’s my drink?”
He was startled at the sudden call, but a few seconds later, he came over with the jug, amused, and I immediately accepted the golden glass and began to chug it down.
“Hey! Slow down,” Mandy said, but I continued going as fast as I could, making sure to swish the alcohol around my mouth.
“Fuck, you really like him.”
It slid down my skin in between my boobs, and then, to my shock, she leaned forward and slipped out her tongue and licked the spill off the swell of my breast.
“Mandy!” I scolded at the resulting and very exciting shouts and bellows that suddenly erupted across the bar. She leaned away, then licked her tongue across her lips.
“Tastes nasty,” she said, and I almost couldn’t help but laugh. I pushed her shoulder away, and then her eyes widened as her gaze went toward the door.
“Finish your drink,” she said very quietly. “And then collapse against the counter as though asleep but drunk.”
I knew and understood exactly what she was saying, so I finished the drink with a little more flamboyancy than was needed and then collapsed my head against the counter like a complete and abject moron.