Chapter 1
TOM
“I know you all don’t understand, but I need to go.”
I can’t take the tears anymore, so I stand and leave the house.
I’ve hardened myself coming here, which only makes it that much worse for them.
They think I don’t care about them. They think I'm leaving because I'm searching for something bigger and that I'm only concerned with finding something that excites me. While that’s all true, I am looking for that outlet, I’d die for every one of them. I would do anything they ask of me.
Except stay.
Not while this need is still inside me. For the longest time, I’ve learned to live with it. I’ve been able to hold most of the feelings at bay. Until I couldn’t anymore. The guilt is just too much, and the anger only increases it.
Telling her is going to be the worst. My body is tight with need and I’m desperate for a release.
“I’m going to Farrah’s now. I’d appreciate it if you all could keep the gossip chat line to a minimum, at least for the next few hours, so I can talk to her myself.”
I turn and walk out of my parents’ house, leaving behind my twin brother, Billy and my baby sister, Francesca, in shock.
Her husband was at the school coaching so I’m preparing to get a call from Jackson later, yelling at me for upsetting his pregnant wife.
In the meantime, I need to get to Farrah’s.
I pull up in front of her home, three doors down from my own. We all live within walking distance of each other. It’s the best and worst part about being so close. Everyone knows everyone’s business, but we’re family. It comes with the territory.
It’s how they all know what Farrah and I have been doing. Well, not everything we’ve been doing. I don’t even know what we’ve been doing. I just know I’ve been avoiding any kind of commitment while enjoying the perks of one.
I knock on the door and let myself in. “Farrah?” I call out.
“Hey, hon! I’m in the kitchen! Dinner won’t be ready for another forty-five minutes. I got a late start. Grab a beer and have a seat on the couch.”
I enter the kitchen, seeing her at the stove stirring a pot of my mother’s famous sauce.
She gave a cooking class for all the girls and this was the number one item requested to learn.
It’s a favorite amongst the men, so I know they were eager to nail it.
I grab a beer, then walk to her. She turns her cheek and I kiss it, then smack her ass.
I catch her shaking her head with a smile as I walk away.
The house is an open layout, so I have a perfect view of her from the living room.
I fall onto the center of the couch, legs spread, and arms draped across the back.
I’m going to miss this. The simplicity of it.
Why can’t we just live like this forever?
Why do we need a title? I think I could give her this, if she would allow me the ease that I need to come and go when called upon.
We never had that conversation though, so I don’t know whether she could handle it.
She’s not a surface relationship type chick.
She’s an all-in, not a bits and pieces. So I fear it would be a moot point.
My body heats. Just watching her affects me and I need to touch her.
Hold her. Mark her. Especially if I’m leaving soon.
I need to get my fill. It will only make missing her that much worse, but the suffering is the punishment I give myself.
I need to love her like I won’t ever have the chance again.
Because I may not.
“Farrah!” I call out. Her body automatically responds to me. She instantly gravitates toward me, wanting to come at my command. Turning from the stove, she takes a step, but then she stops herself and a smile takes over.
I widen my legs at her hesitation and her lips roll in, trying to hide the smile that’s already formed on her lips.
“I’m busy, Tommy.” She turns her back on me and continues cooking at the stove.
My blood boils at her denial.
“Farrah!” I call louder. Her body jumps again.
She wants to come to me, but she wants to play the game, too.
Farrah has come quite a long way since we first got together.
She was demure. Na?ve. A ‘nice girl’ even though she hung out with Jackson’s wild sister and even my sister, who can go off the edge every once in a while.
But I saw it in her eyes when she would catch me watching her.
All those years ago. She wanted to be caught. She just didn’t want to admit it.
“I won’t ask again.”
She shrugs. “Then don’t. I told you. I’m busy.”
I grin to myself. She really wants to be taken tonight.
There are days I will beckon her and she submits instantly.
She did this at the beginning of our relationship, or situationship is probably the better word, thinking she didn’t have a say.
I’ve taught her since then. I want her to push back.
Like any powerful couple, you need to spice it up.
Sex cannot stay status quo. Now, her defiance mixed with her submissiveness are the things I love most about her.
I need the fight she’s willing to give me and she always seems to read me well enough to know when I need it.
Like now.
Standing, I head to her bedroom, going in search of what I know is in her closet. My spare uniform is here for when I stay over and need to get right to the station. And one suit, with a tie, which is just what I have in mind to correct her attitude.
Walking back down the hall quietly, I catch her watching me, then she spins around.
“When I tell you to come to me, I expect you to follow orders. I don’t say it to hear myself talk.
I say it because I want you near me. To be with me.
I need to touch you. Smell you, I need to feel you.
” I step closer, further into the kitchen.
“Now, you’re stuck with me until I say we’re done. ”
She takes a step back, and I follow her backward movement.
“Go ahead and run.” Her eyes glance past me.
She’s calculating whether she can get by me without me grabbing her.
“You can’t get by me.” Her eyes flare and her lips pull.
She likes that I know what she’s thinking.
“I’ll let you, though. I like it when you run.
I love that look you get in your eyes. The uncertainty of what I’ll do when I catch you.
Because make no mistake. I will catch you. ”
She dodges to the left and I follow, which elicits a shriek from her. She laughs at her outburst and her face blushes.
“Tommy!”
“Run, little mouse. But your lion is coming.”
I back up, allowing her to dart by, reaching out and brushing her arm as she does so. She screams again, and it excites me.
I turn on my heels quickly following her, with the tie in hand, as she runs down the hall.
“You’re trapping yourself! You’re making it easy for me.” I call out and slow my walk as she increases her speed. I hear one door slam and then another. “Ahh, a game. Which door is it?”
I slow my steps and listen. I’m trained to hear everything around me.
A sound. A smell. A breath being held. I can hear it all.
I continue to creep down the hall. I know where she is. She slammed two doors to throw me off her track, but I know she’s hiding in the walk-in closet. I knock lightly on the wall as I pass and hear the uptick in her breathing.
And I smile.
Walking into the bedroom, I shut the door slowly.
“I know you’re in here. I can smell your pussy already dripping for me.” I walk closer to the closet. “I know you ran in here because you know what goes on in this room. And you love it. Come out. Now.”
She listens this time, emerging from the closet. She’s breathing erratically and she’s flushed.
“You’re turned on. You love it when I chase you.”
She nods.
“Come.”
She steps up in front of me. “Lift your arms.” Grabbing the hem of her shirt and pulling it over her head, I dropped it to the floor. I caress her breasts, then trace the pulse point on her neck, which is beating erratically. A breath leaves her lips upon my touch.
“Turn around.”
She does and I yank her shorts down, exposing her lace panties, and kneel behind her.
I grace the seams, slipping my finger under them and see goosebumps emerge onto her skin.
Leaning in, I drag my lips across her hip to her ass, then bite her cheek.
She whimpers, the sound only makes my cock harder.
Standing, I loop the tie I’ve been holding and slide her wrists through it. I turn her to face me. Her eyes are lit up, anticipating what will happen next. I run my thumb across her bottom lip, as she continues to watch me.
“You’re gorgeous, Farrah.” I lean in, kissing her, wanting to remember this feeling, this heat that passes between us. I’m going to need it for the year I’m gone.
Taking her now, then leaving just a few brief hours later, makes me an asshole, but I can’t stop the momentum I have churning inside myself. I have to have her.
“Kneel.”
She drops instantly and falls into her role. She looks up at me with round doe's eyes waiting to be told what to do. I undo my belt, pop my button, and let my jeans fall to the floor. She eagerly leans in, nuzzling my cock through my boxer briefs. I grab her hair and yank her head back.
“I didn’t tell you to do that.”
She sits back on her thighs and waits. I step out of my jeans and my boxers, then get up close to her again. Fisting my cock, I drag it around her lips. Her eyes never leave mine.
“Suck it, Farrah. Show me how much you love my cock.”
She takes me deep, her hot mouth covering me instantly. It’s almost too much to stand. She drags her teeth slowly over my cock as she pulls back and it sends shivers down my spine. This woman is unlike any other I’ve been with. She pushes her own limits, knowing it’s what I need to reach mine.