Chapter 5
HIS STATEMENT—SO CALMLY delivered—seemed to be coming from a very long way away, so Elodie thought, at first, she’d misheard.
“You can’t seriously be suggesting we get married? We’ve known each other for a sum total of, what? Twelve hours? And most of these we spent not talking.”
“I remember how we spent our time, Elodie, but it’s not a good idea to remind me of it right now.”
The unmistakable need in his voice made her whole body surge with something she hadn’t expected—heat.
So, she ached to reach out and grab a fist of his shirt and drag him against her.
Because whatever had made those words grow and reverberate in his throat and burst from him like fire and flame were in each syllable, she felt too. Of course she did.
That night they’d shared had been the hottest of her life. It had redefined everything she’d thought she’d known about sex. It had redefined the parameters of what she wanted in a relationship. But they’d both agreed it was just a one-time thing, and that was especially relevant now.
They could never fall back in bed together. It would be a disaster to complicate this already messy situation with sex—no matter how hot.
“I am not suggesting we get married,” he responded, eyes flaring, a hint of colour staining his cheekbones. “Nor am I suggesting any relationship of any sort, between us. You are, however, the mother of my child, and I can see no alternative besides living together.”
She shook her head quickly. “That’s absurd.”
“Why?”
“Because…I just said…we don’t know each other.”
“Do we need to know each other?”
“You’re suggesting I pack up my life—,”
“Such as it is.”
She shot him a fierce look. “Don’t use what I told you in the heat of the moment against me. You have no right to judge me.”
He had the decency to look surprised, and then, to lift his hand in a silent gesture of apology. “That wasn’t my intention.”
“Perhaps not, but it’s what you did.”
“You’re right. I’m not thinking straight.”
Her lips compressed. His admission took the sting out of her anger. “Neither of us is, clearly.” She sucked in a breath. “But I can’t pack up my life here, and move to Italy, to live with a man I don’t know. It’s just ridiculous.”
“Ridiculous is thinking we can have a baby and not get to know each other. One way or another, we will be sharing this child. Isn’t it better to spend your pregnancy preparing for that?”
It sounded so logical. So reasonable and right. How could he do that? A moment ago, she’d been convinced this was the most preposterous suggestion he could have made, and now, was she actually considering it?
“Okay, but you have this place. Why Italy?”
His nostrils flared then, and he seemed to draw himself up to his full height, easily adding an inch or more—or so it seemed to Elodie, who was already feeling dwarfed by him.
“I am a Santoro, cara. I have houses all over the world, but that—that is my home. It’s where my child belongs.”
“Our child,” she corrected absentmindedly, pressing a hand to her stomach. It was still almost impossible to believe she was pregnant, and with his baby.
His eyes narrowed. “Yes. Our child.”
She swallowed past a throat that was slightly constricted. “I need to think.”
He stared down at her, his features giving nothing away.
“Why don’t we talk about this tomorrow? Once we have the results from the paternity test, I mean.”
“You seem confident the results will prove my paternity.”
“Oh, I know they will.”
“Then there’s no harm having this conversation now.”
“Rafaello, listen to me.” She glanced around, needing to sit down, even though she felt it would put her at a significant disadvantage, in terms of height and presence.
She moved across to one of the beige leather sofas, carefully avoiding looking in the direction of the ottoman on which they’d first made love.
Wildness had driven them; they’d come together in an almost animalistic passion, desperate simply to be together.
Even without looking in that direction, memories seared her.
She cleared her throat, trying to focus her thoughts.
“I literally found out I was pregnant this morning. I came to tell you about it almost immediately, because I felt that once I knew, you should know too. It didn’t feel fair or right to hide this from you.
But I’m begging you for a bit of time and space to get my head around what this means, for both of us.
For all of us.” Her hand pressed softly against her stomach.
“I know we’re going to be parents, and that we’re going to have to come to a compromise around what that looks like, but my life had already been turned on its head more times than I can count recently. Please don’t do it to me again.”
He was very quiet and very still for several beats, and then, he walked towards her with long, feral strides. She had been right to feel that sitting down would give him an advantage. He towered over her, and she had to angle her neck sharply to meet his gaze.
“I take no pleasure in complicating your life, but this cannot be helped. I don’t see what advantage there is in waiting.”
Her mouth moved but no words came out.
He expelled a harsh sigh then crouched down, his large body framed right in front of hers, his hands on her knees.
“You have no money, no home, a job you will not be able to do for much longer. You told me yourself, you don’t know what you want to do with your life.
So come to Italy for a while and do this. ”
“This?”
“Enjoy your pregnancy. Be looked after by my staff and simply relax.”
“You’re doing it again,” she murmured with exasperation.
“Doing what?”
“Taking a seriously certifiable idea and making it sound normal and reasonable. Like this actually makes sense.”
“It does make sense.”
She wanted to dispute that, but everything he was suggesting sounded a lot like an answer to all her problems. And she hated that, even when she knew the wise thing would be to accept it.
“I’m not someone who planned to get knocked up by some rich guy,” she muttered.
“If anything, it’s the opposite. I always thought I’d be the one supporting my family, that I’d be the one going back to work as soon as a baby was born. ”
If he thought the statement was strangely revealing, he didn’t react at first. “So, you have given this some thought?”
Elodie twisted her fingers together, her past like an awful darkness on her horizon. But what point was there in hiding this from him? Besides, it wasn’t a secret. The whole of her village knew all about her doomed relationship.
“I was engaged,” she said, haltingly. “We’d been together a long time, and I’d presumed that once we were married, we’d start trying for a baby. So yes,” she pressed a hand to her stomach. “I’ve thought about this.”
“And now you’re pregnant to a man you don’t know or care for, and life is nothing like you thought it would be?”
“Yes, exactly,” she agreed, a little breathily, because it was as though he’d drilled right into her mind and plucked out the truth of her thoughts. “That’s exactly how it is.”
“This is a curve ball for me, too.”
She nodded slowly. “I know. That’s why I’m suggesting we take some time…”
“No.”
Her eyes flared wide at that.
“We went to an obstetrics appointment today. No doubt the story will leak sooner or later. I’d prefer to have our ducks in a row prior to that happening.”
“The story is not going to leak. Who would even care—,” she said with a quick roll of her eyes, before remembering who she was talking to.
It was strange, but she thought of him simply as Raf, rather than Rafaello Santoro.
Now that she knew who he was, and what his family was like, she supposed it was na?ve to presume there’d be zero interest in this.
“Yes,” he said, clearly recognizing the moment comprehension dawned for her. “You’re starting to see the problem.”
She shook her head slowly.
“Listen to me. When word of this gets out, you will be hounded by the press. In Italy, in my villa, I can protect you from that. Trust me, Elodie. I know what my life is like, I can see the way this will play out. The best thing to do is fly home with me tonight and start thinking about what the rest of our lives will look like.”
“It’s crazy,” she disputed, but she could hear the ambivalence in her voice.
“Come for a month,” he suggested. “Four weeks. At the end of that, we can reassess. Va bene?”
Elodie could hardly think straight. Five hours later, she was ensconced on a luxurious private jet, being whisked across the Med, towards Italy and the future he’d forecast. Every minute brought with it a change of heart.
She went from feeling she was doing the right thing, to knowing she wasn’t, to wishing with all her heart for clarity, then thinking she had it, then doubling back again.
It was exhausting, and shortly after takeoff, she succumbed to a surprisingly deep, dreamless sleep.
She was dimly aware of the feeling of the plane’s descent, then Raf’s strong hands on her body, searching for the seatbelt to unfasten it, before lifting her against his chest, cradling her off the plane.
She was too tired to do anything more than nuzzle in closer to his neck.
Even in her dreamy sleep though, she was aware of the way his body stiffened, the harsh exhalation of his breath bursting across her brow.
Her eyes fluttered open when he placed her into the back of a car and fastened her seatbelt.
Just like in London, she thought—or perhaps said—as he folded his frame into the seat beside her.
Then, she was asleep again, the exhaustion of her pregnancy sapping her completely of energy.
She couldn’t have said how far they travelled, nor in which direction, but as the car slowed to a stop, she jolted awake, glancing around with a sense of disorientation and then, when her eyes landed on Raf, with a rush of heat and a quick parting of her lips.