16. Hudson
16
HUDSON
“I ’m sorry, Mila,” I said quietly. “Your father’s right about everything.”
I watched a tear escape the corner of Mila’s face, breaking my heart. I never wanted to make her cry. That was the last thing I wanted to do, but I did it anyway.
Nelson was right. I should be ashamed of myself. I’ve never chased a younger woman and I definitely never stabbed my best friend in the back before. He trusted in me. Guilt washed over me as I watched Mila sob.
“I’m sorry for hurting you, Mila. I took advantage of you,” I told her.
“You didn’t take advantage of me. I wanted this…just like you did,” she cried. Her eyes were red, her make-up smeared from her tears.
My heart shattered. She was right; I wanted to be with her. She made me happy, but I should have been strong enough to resist her. I knew this would happen once Nelson found out. For fuck’s sake, he caught me buried deep in his daughter.
“I shouldn’t have led you on, Mila. This holidate was a mistake and I shouldn’t have asked you to go with me,” I said solemnly, my heart crumbling into pieces. “It’s best that we don’t see each other anymore.” Saying those words was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do, but it had to be done. It’s what’s best for the both of us. Keep telling yourself that, Hudson.
“You told me that you missed me and that I was yours. Was that all a lie?” she asked, her voice cracking.
I swallowed the lump in my throat, unable to answer her. I did say those words to her, but it was in the moment of lust. Right? I walked to the front door, then twisted my body to look at Mila one last time. Sadness washed over me and I wished I could reassure Mila, but it was best if I just walked away and leave.
“You’re just a coward,” she gritted out.
My body stiffened at the blow from her words. I don’t blame her for being upset with me. Maybe I am a coward, but this was what I needed to do. I walked out of her home and never looked back.
I got into my car and buried my face in my hands. I just broke up with Mila. I should feel relieved, but my heart is aching. My decision to break up with her would patch up my friendship with Nelson…or I hoped it would. But why do I feel miserable?
I turned on the ignition and headed back to my house, my mind replaying all the events that happened today. I was miserable not seeing Mila for the last few days after coming home from Hawaii. When I saw her again, I felt like I found the missing piece to the puzzle. She made me whole. I couldn’t deny that what Mila and I had was electrifying. Being with her made sense, even if it didn’t make sense to Nelson. He didn’t approve with the idea of Mila and I being together, and I’m sure our other friends and family would feel the same as him. I did what I thought was right for all of us, but I left her place in even worse emotional condition before I got there.
I needed to figure out a way to get her off my mind and move on. It may be easier said than done.