5. 2
He grabbed her hand abruptly and strode out of the house, making her jog behind to keep up.
Asha sighed, knowing she was about to have her second crucial confrontation of the day, except this one wouldn’t just wound her feelings—it would rupture her heart.
Asha stopped abruptly, slamming into Kade’s massive body as they arrived outside, the door closing quietly behind them. He’d halted unexpectedly right outside the door and crowded her against the wall right next to the door. He leaned into her, his chest heaving, one hand against the wall on both sides of her body, effectively trapping her.
“I swore I wasn’t going to do this,”
he said in a husky, desperate voice, his eyes boring into hers, his forehead damp with sweat. “I swore I wasn’t going to react when I saw you again. Why the hell should I care about a woman who doesn’t give a shit about me?”
One of his hands fisted and slammed against the wooden exterior of Max’s house in a gesture of frustration.
Asha looked up at him, her heart clenching at the exhaustion and torment showing on his face. “I do care, Kade.”
“Bullshit. You left. You didn’t even say good-bye. You never called to let me know how you were doing or if you were okay. I wasn’t even a blip on your radar,”
he spat out resentfully.
“There hasn’t been a day, or even an hour, that I haven’t thought about you.”
Or a moment, for that matter. Kade haunted her constantly. “I missed you.”
Time stopped as Kade searched her face, as though trying to figure out exactly what she was thinking. “I can tell,”
he answered sarcastically. “You tried so hard to stay in touch—”
“I couldn’t, okay!”
she shouted at him. “Everything about you confuses me. You waltz into my life with all your kindness and sexy male hotness.”
She took a breath and waved a hand at Kade, the aforementioned hot male. “Then you overwhelm me with your thoughtfulness, ply me with food, and then make me climax until I think I’m losing my mind.”
She jammed a finger into his chest. “You made me into nothing but female hormones that were always willing to hop onto your…your… testosterone,” she finished awkwardly. “I couldn’t think about anything but you, and I still can’t. So don’t tell me I didn’t miss you. I’ve lost count of how many times an hour I dial half your number and then hang up the phone.”
“Maybe you should have dialed the other half of the number,”
Kade said hoarsely.
Asha rolled her eyes, still on a roll. “I couldn’t. I knew if I did, I’d want to see you even if you didn’t want to see me.”
She pushed on his chest, trying to break away from his confinement.
“Then see me, Asha. Please. Because I want to see you,”
Kade argued persistently, not letting her break away.
“And then what? We’d just end up having incredible sex,”
she accused him anxiously.
Kade’s lips twitched as he looked down at her. “And that’s a bad thing…um…why exactly?”
“Because I can’t think when that happens. There has to be more than just good sex,”
she blurted out, still trying desperately to make Kade understand.
“It’s never been just good sex,”
Kade retorted angrily. “It’s good sex because there’s more than that between us.”
Asha shuddered as she remembered having relations with her ex-husband, and the lack of emotion, the way she detached herself from the act. She knew Kade was right. Problem was, she couldn’t exactly blurt out how much she loved him, and her concern was how he felt about her. “Is it different for you? I mean…with us?”
“If you’re asking if I’ve ever fucked and felt the way I do with you, the answer is no,”
he replied hotly. “You rock my world just as much as I rock yours. Difference is, I’m not afraid of it. Hell, I want to feel that way. It’s exhilarating and exciting, and it makes me feel more alive than I’ve felt in a very long time…maybe ever. And I sure as hell don’t want to walk away from it.”
“Then maybe I’m just a coward.”
Asha broke Kade’s gaze and lowered her head. “Maybe I just can’t handle it.”
“Bullshit. That was no coward who just basically told her foster parents to go to hell. It’s taken a lot of courage to do some of the things you’ve done, and you get braver all the time. In fact, I think you’re actually developing a temper.”
Kade reached down and tipped her chin up and grinned. “Did you really just accuse me of trying to sway you with sexy male hotness?”
“It’s true,”
she told him stubbornly. “Not that you can probably help it, but it’s distracting.”
Kade nodded. “Good. I want to be a distraction for you because you drive me completely insane.”
He swooped down and kissed up the side of her neck, nuzzling her ear as he whispered, “Just your scent makes me hard, and all I have to do is hear your voice or see your face and I’m ruined. Let me see you, Asha. Let me show you how good being together can be. Running away isn’t going to resolve this for either of us. It’s not going away.”
Asha shivered at the feel of his warm breath on the side of her face, his lips lightly caressing her skin. She knew he was right, and she’d either have to see this thing through with him or continue running away from it. And she didn’t want to run away anymore, especially not from Kade. She wanted to run toward him, fling herself in his arms where everything in her world felt right, and continue to love him with every beat of her heart like she already did. Being with Kade made her feel alive, too, except he’d actually brought her to life for the first time, breathed life into her. “Yes,”
she whispered softly, wrapping her arms around his neck. “If you want to see me…then see me.”
Kade cupped her face in his large hands as he answered with passionate conviction, “I already see you, sweetheart. I always have.”
Asha sighed happily as his lips captured hers, opening her mouth to taste him. He tasted like coffee and pure sin, and she savored him. One long, lingering kiss turned into another, until he finally pulled her head against his chest and held her so tightly she almost squealed.
“Thank God,”
he growled fiercely, his hands stroking over her back. “I know what you’ve been through, and I know I pushed you too hard, but having you leave nearly killed me. I wanted to come after you, but I couldn’t get past the fact that you didn’t want me.”
“I did want you,”
Asha murmured against his chest. “How could you come after me if you didn’t know where I was?”
Kade pulled back, putting a possessive arm around her waist and walked her down Max’s steps. “I knew exactly where you were.”
Asha snorted. “Is there anyone who doesn’t know where I live?”
Kade shot her a grin. “Not anyone who cares about you. And the people who do have some pretty scary influence and connections.”
“I noticed,”
she grumbled softly. “My car—”
“Needs to be junked,”
Kade interrupted irritably. “The tires are shot and who knows what might be wrong with it mechanically. Couldn’t you have bought something a little newer?”
“It wasn’t in my budget. I’m saving. And there’s nothing wrong with it. It just needs tires,”
Asha remarked defensively. “My neighbor checked it over. He said it looked good except for the tires.”
“Was he looking at you or the car when he said it?”
Kade grumbled. “Some kid?”
“Tate happens to be about your age. And he knows cars.”
“He’s a jackass,”
Kade muttered, leading Asha over to the motorcycle parked in the driveway. “I’ll take you home and have new tires put on your car. And I’m having it checked over mechanically, even though your knowledgeable neighbor already said it’s safe.”
Asha took a breath to argue, but Kade held up a hand and cut her off. “Don’t even start. You can give me this much. Let me know you’re safe.”
She let the breath out and smiled. Yeah…she could. He was trying to help her, and she accepted gracefully. Looking at the motorcycle, which looked like a high-tech vehicle, she admitted ruefully, “I’ve never ridden on one of these.”
And honestly, she’d never wanted to.
“Then you haven’t really lived.”
He opened the saddlebag and pulled out a helmet as he grabbed his own from the seat.
“It looks…fancy. Is it fast?”
Kade pulled a leather jacket out of the saddlebag too, and closed the door. “This is a BMW touring bike. Not as fast as my racing bike, but fast enough,”
he answered with a boyish grin. “Here.”
He held up the jacket so she could slip her arms inside.
“It’s over seventy degrees today,”
Asha argued, not really crazy about the idea of putting on a leather jacket while Kade was in a short-sleeved maroon t-shirt, jeans, and black biker boots. She was attired much the same, except she was wearing sneakers rather than boots.
“It’s lightweight and it isn’t for warmth. It’s protection,”
he told her adamantly.
She sighed and put her arms into the jacket, letting it swallow her upper body. It obviously belonged to Kade. “It smells like you,”
she said dreamily, his scent surrounding her.
“Sweetheart, if I hear you say something like that in that fuck-me tone of voice again, I’ll be compelled to make you come right here in Max’s driveway,”
Kade threatened, his words a grunt of warning.
Asha’s gut clenched in reaction, a pulse of electricity flowing from her belly to her pussy. Her panties dampened as she pulled the lining of the jacket to her face and inhaled, but she stayed silent.
“Woman, you’re pushing my buttons,”
Kade cautioned in a low, vibrating voice as he rolled up the sleeves of the jacket and zipped it.
She was swimming in the coat, the material coming down to her thighs. It was way too warm, but she didn’t complain. Asha reveled in the way that Kade was watching out for her, protecting her. “So what do I do?”
she asked, slightly intimidated by the large motorcycle.
“Hold on,”
Kade told her jokingly, but went through the basics.
Once they were situated on the motorcycle, Asha wrapped her arms around Kade and scooted up against his back.
“Tighter,”
Kade ordered huskily. “And don’t let go.”
The helmets had Bluetooth, and Kade had already explained it, but the sound of his voice in her ear still startled her.
Once the bike was in motion, Kade didn’t have to tell her to hold tight. She started with a death grip around him, but tried to relax and stay neutral in position like he’d asked her to do. Most of her fear fled as she experienced Kade’s competence at riding. His motions were smooth and fluid, and he rode with a confidence of a man who had been riding for a very long time.
“You okay?”
Kade asked quietly.
“Yeah,”
she breathed softly. “This is great. Can we go faster?”
Asha trusted Kade, and the feeling of freedom she felt from riding in the open air was exhilarating.
She heard Kade chuckle. “No, we can’t, my little speed demon. I’m doing the speed limit. I’m carrying precious cargo.”
He hesitated for a moment. “We can get on the freeway. I know a place where we can go faster safely.”
“Yes,”
she agreed readily. “Go.”
The speed on the freeway was heady, and Asha clung to Kade, enjoying the ride with unrestrained abandon.
“I’m getting off at this exit,”
he warned her after they had gotten out of the city, letting her know they were going to slow to a stop.
“Where are we?”
she asked curiously.
“You’ll see,”
he answered mysteriously.
After driving for about five minutes, they arrived at what looked like a large arena. Kade stopped at the gates and punched a code into a panel, waiting until the gates opened enough for them to slip through. They moved down a narrow passage that opened into a large, paved racetrack.
“Do you know who owns this?”
she asked inquisitively, excitement in her voice.
“Yes. Quite well. He happens to be my brother. This is Travis’s track. He races cars as a hobby. He’s a damn good driver.”
“He doesn’t seem like the type to do anything like that,”
Asha answered, stunned that a conservative man like Travis had a dangerous hobby.
“One of his few quirks,”
Kade answered jokingly. “You ready? We aren’t doing anything crazy. And if you get scared, just tell me.”
He pulled the bike onto the track and started to pick up speed.
“Okay,”
Asha agreed, her heart accelerating with the motorcycle. The track was composed of long straightaways where Kade accelerated quickly and had them flying down the linear areas, and slowing down for the corners. Nevertheless, Asha was laughing with pure delight as he sped down the track, making her feel like she was flying.
“Scared?”
Kade asked as he slowed for a corner.
“No. I trust you,”
she admitted in a breathless voice.
“Fuck! You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to hear you say that,”
Kade answered in a graveled, serious voice.
“Can we go faster?”
Asha begged.
“No. Neither one of us is dressed appropriately and this bike isn’t meant for racing, my fearless woman. I think you need a trip to Disneyworld. You’d love it,”
Kade remarked as he slowed, bringing the bike to a stop on the side of the track.
“I’ve never been to any amusement park,”
Asha confirmed, trying to finger comb her hair below the helmet into some semblance of order.
“Why am I not surprised,”
Kade grumbled unhappily.
Asha got off first, Kade steadying the bike as she dismounted. He removed his helmet and then removed hers, stowing all the gear, including his leather jacket, in the saddlebags. “We can grab something to drink. Travis keeps his fridge stocked here.”
“Kade?”
He took her hand and guided her toward what appeared to be garages. “Yeah?”
“Thank you for this. That was wonderful,”
she told him genuinely. “It was one of the best things I’ve ever done. One of the few things.”
“Do I want to know about the others?”
Kade asked, stopping at the door of the building.
“I can only think of one thing that felt more incredible.”
Asha grinned at him. “And I experienced that with you, too.”
“That so?”
he asked dangerously, pinning her against the door with his body.
Asha wrapped her arms around his neck, desperately needing to feel Kade skin-to-skin with her. “Yes.”
She looked up into his smoldering blue eyes and her heart skittered. He looked tense, the dark circles under his eyes more pronounced, and she wanted to sooth him, comfort him, make him lose himself in something other than the negative emotions he’d been experiencing for the last few months. In that moment, she hated what she’d had to do to get herself together. It was obvious that Kade cared. He might not love her, but he definitely stressed over her, worried about her. And she’d caused him pain.
“I’m so sorry I hurt you,”
she told him gently, smoothing the circles under his eyes and the lines of tension on his face. “I didn’t mean to.”
Her hand slid down his chest, over his ripped abs and finally stroked over his jeans, caressing the sizeable erection trying to burst through the seams of the denim. “You’re so hard.”
“Fuck!”
Kade captured her roaming hand in his own and went into the garage, tugging her behind him. “I need that drink to cool off. Don’t start something I can’t finish,”
he rumbled in an ominous tone.
They moved past several vehicles and ended up in an office that Asha assumed belonged to Travis. “I’ll finish it,”
Asha told him quietly, feeling awkward to actually be sexually aggressive, but she wanted to be. She wanted to do things with Kade that she never wanted with any other man. Although she loved Kade’s passionate alpha male sexuality, she longed to please him.
And she was beyond ready to spread her wings a little and try.
Kade gulped hard, trying to swallow a lump in his throat that felt like it was the size of a small boulder. A look somewhere between desire and determination was radiating from her expression, and he knew she had something in mind, something that would probably turn him inside out and upside down…again.
Glancing around the office, he noted that there wasn’t much here. There was a tattered couch, a desk and chair, and the fridge. The carpet looked anything but clean, smudges of grease from the garage dotting various areas of the floor. “I’m not taking you here,”
Kade told Asha roughly. “It’s not clean.”
Asha gave him a sultry smile and unbuttoned the top button of his jeans. “No problem. I plan to get…dirty.”
“Asha, I—”
“Please let me,”
Asha said in a vulnerable voice. “I’ve never tried seducing a man before, and I’ve never tasted you, but I want to. I was never brave enough before.”
Holy fuck! Kade nearly spent himself in his jeans as Asha slowly lowered his zipper and traced her fingers over his cock through the silken material of his boxers. Everything inside him wanted to strip her and bury himself inside her, but he didn’t. This was a moment he wanted to savor, his little butterfly trusting him, trying to break away from her cocoon. Kade promised himself he wouldn’t move, wouldn’t spoil the moment. But Christ, it was going to be hard, and he wasn’t sure how much harder it could get before he lost it. “Take control, Asha,”
he told her, nearly choking as her fingers inexpertly fumbled with the cock she’d just liberated from his jeans and boxers.
“I want to please you,”
she whispered, uncertainty making her voice tremble.
She pleased him just by existing, so having her hands on him was ecstasy. He reached down and covered her hand with his, showing her how to stroke him. “Kiss me,”
he demanded, unable to go another minute without somehow being inside her.
Taking her eyes off his cock, she lifted her head and placed her mouth to his, her tongue pushing boldly past his lips, searching for his tongue.
Don’t take control. This is Asha’s moment.
Kade told himself that over and over as Asha’s tongue explored the recesses of his mouth, starting to enter and retreat, matching the pace with the pumps to his cock. Wrapping a hand around the back of his neck, she held him tightly, her fingers threaded through the hair at his nape.
When she finally pulled her mouth from his, she left him panting, his hand encouraging faster pumps to his cock. He couldn’t take this for very long, not without being inside her.
Asha jerked her hand away suddenly, and he let her free with a superhuman effort. Really, he just wanted to jerk his cock until he came, release some of the tension that had built until he was nearing detonation.
She was jerking up his t-shirt. “Off,”
she ordered sternly, grasping and pulling the shirt upward.
Kade pulled it up and off, dropping it to the floor, and then wondered if he had made the right move in disposing of it. Asha’s hands were everywhere, stroking over his tattoos and touching every inch of bare skin she could find. When her mouth started sucking on one of his nipples, he groaned, his entire body shuddering, needing her desperately. “Asha,”
he growled in a low warning. “I’m trying. But if you don’t stop teasing me, I’m going to be inside you in about five seconds.”
There was only so much a guy could take, and experienced in seduction or not, Asha was the hottest woman on the planet to him. That roaming mouth had to stop.
“You’re so beautiful, Kade. So handsome and perfectly made.”
Her voice was low and sensuous, but the awe in her tone was genuine. She stroked over his muscled biceps to his chest, her fingers touching every bulging, developed muscle until she finally reached his happy trail. As her finger descended down the hairline leading to his groin, Asha went to her knees, her mouth following her exploring finger.
No one had ever called him beautiful, or even handsome. Yeah…he worked out, and his body was okay except for his mangled leg, but Asha’s words made him sweat bullets trying to control himself. His hands fisted to his side; he willed himself to let her explore, ignoring the bunched tendons in the back of his neck and the sensation of the blood pumping forcefully through his head—both of them!!
His knees nearly gave way as her sweet mouth touched his cock, licking the drop of pre-cum from the tip. “Sensitive there,”
he told her between clenched teeth. Holy hell, every area of his body felt hypersensitive at the moment.
Kade looked down at her just as she sucked his dick into her mouth like a lollipop, nearly making him come just from the sensation and visual. Unable to stop himself, he speared his fingers through her hair and guided her head in a bobbing motion, groaning with pleasure as her tongue slid along the underside of his engorged cock. “Baby, I won’t last long.”
His words came out between pants, his breath sawing in and out of his lungs, his heart thundering so furiously that he felt like he was having a heart attack.
When she moaned around his cock…he completely lost it.
“I need to be inside you. Now.”