Chapter 19 #2
Guns: If she’s done with her attitude. NVM. I know she’s cooled off. Yeah. I’ll be there. Stop by my room when you’re ready to leave. I’m busy and need some extra time, so how about an hour?
Me: Fine, but how the fuck did you meet someone last night? I thought you went straight back here after you left.
Guns: I did. When I walked into the hotel, some hottie stopped me. We’re getting famous, bro. The benefits are starting to roll in without even trying.
Me: Keep it wrapped.
Guns: Always.
My guts knot and my thoughts travel. After the chlamydia issue with Zara, Leon figured out I got it from her. It’s the only good thing that came from that night.
He makes sure if anything is gonna happen with me, condoms are a must. That includes anything he does to me. He doesn’t wanna catch anything.
Bile rises up my throat. I’m sickened with myself for how I keep letting this horror story go on. It’s been almost two years of living with this hell and torture.
Whenever I get determined that I’m gonna refuse and turn him in, he finds a new way to force me into it. Usually with threats against my ma or Livianna. There’s no way I’ll let him hurt my family any more than he has.
I figured out real fast that the money isn’t his true incentive. The reason behind his actions remains a mystery.
Maybe he just wants to torment my family for the fun of it. Stealing my cash is just an added benefit and excuse to keep me in line.
I’ve figured out if he’s around late in the day or after a gig, he’s got plans to take advantage of me. That’s when I use a lot of different drugs and drink.
That way, by the time he summons me, forces me to take the Floating V, and it hits me, I’m turned on for two seconds before I black out. I skip right through the hallucination part of it, and that’s fine by me.
I still know fucked-up shit goes down because of the aches and pain in various places in my body that scream at me when I come to. Or if he’s feeling particularly venomous, he’ll send me a clip of what occurred.
I usually live on painkillers for a week after each assault just to numb myself and try to forget. Bren confronts me and smacks me out of my self-destruction before I get too out of control.
So far, Zara hasn’t been a part of any of the events since that one night, but I can’t be sure. I don’t watch the videos Leon tries to show me anymore.
He was pissed about her giving me an STD, so I like to believe he won’t let her near me again. It’s my only hope and solace.
All this is the reason I’m failing with Livianna. The guilt eats me alive and I check out. She would never forgive me if she knew any of this.
There’s a knock on my door. I roll out of bed and shake these terrible thoughts out of my head. I answer without looking through the peephole, thinking it’s Bren.
Leon comes into view on the other side. “Cash, did I catch you at a bad time?”
“It’s always a bad time where you’re concerned.” I try to shut the door in his face.
He slams his palm against it and stops it. “We need to discuss something.”
“Livianna’s here. It’ll have to wait.”
“She’s the thing I’m referring to.”
My limbs go cold. I glance at the bathroom. The shower is still going and she’s in there singing along to our songs.
I make space for him to enter. “Make it quick.”
“It won’t take long.” He steps inside, eyeing me up and down like he’d like to take me right now.
I’m only in my boxer briefs and I instantly tense. I grab my jeans and work myself into them.
“Leon, tell me why you’re here.” I find a shirt and put it on.
“Zara told me Livianna quit her show. I’m here to let you know that with all the extra free time she’ll have, she won’t be welcome to join you any longer while you’re on the road.”
“You can’t do that.”
“I can and I just did.”
“Why? You’re not even with us most of the time.”
“Livianna causes issues for my other artists.” He cocks an eyebrow and shows a sinister smile. “There is another way we can do this if you’re open to the idea.”
The sick feeling I get when he’s around permeates me. “I already know I’m not.”
“Very well. It’s decided. Livianna will return home later today and won’t be invited back.”
“No fucking way am I agreeing to this. I’ll refuse to get on stage. Fuck, I’ll quit.”
“Try it, Cash, and the repercussions will be devastating.” He pretends to scroll through his phone. “Which video should I send to the press first? The one of your mom and uncle fucking while your father is tied up and watching or—”
“Stop, you sick fuck.”
Leon slides his phone into his blazer pocket. “If you bring Livianna out with the band again, I’ll be forced to include her in our little arrangement.”
“You won’t fucking touch her.”
“If she shows up again, I will.” He strides toward the door. “After all, it’s how your mom got involved in this situation. Your dad wouldn’t listen and look at what happened. You don’t want to walk the same path as him, do you?”
Hatred boils inside of me and I get crushed by Leon’s iron foot once again. “One of these days, I’ll figure out how to ruin you and when I do, I’ll burn you alive.”
“If you try, stupid boy, your demise will follow. And all those you love will take the fall right after you.” Leon shakes his head. “Like father, like son. It’s a shame. Just like him, you’re too stupid and stubborn to see how easy this could be if only you would give in.”
“To what? Tell me what you want and let’s end this right now.”
Leon turns to me. “Isn’t it obvious, Cash? I want you. Your dad loved me once and I know you can too. Just face it. We’re fated to be together. I thought it was your father, but now I know that’s not the case. He was the connection to you and you’re even better.”
“Callum.” Livianna stands at the opening of the bathroom with her eyes sliding from Leon and me in horror. “What is he talking about?”