Chapter 24
Chapter Twenty-Four
CALLUM/CASH
Then
Papers Bleed & Bottles Don’t Lie
The door shuts, the room slips, and somewhere between the pills and the lyrics, I forget who started the fire.
My ma places her car keys and purse on the dining room table after picking me up from the police station. “You’re lucky the DA declined to file after Sebastian wouldn’t cooperate.”
I plop down on the couch. “I knew Sebastian wouldn’t make those charges stick. He knows I have information about him that I’d gladly hand over.”
“What kind of information?” She turns and faces me.
“Leon showed me a video of Sebastian trying to go for Livianna while she was passed out. I know he wants to do things to her and I’m not gonna let him.”
“Oh, Bubba. I’m sorry.”
“Be sorry for Livianna, not me. I have no regrets about hitting him.”
“Why not give what you have to the cops now and let them handle it?”
“We have an agreement.” I rest my head back to stave off my never-ending headache. “He stays away from Livianna and I keep my distance from him.”
“And that’s enough?”
“It has to be. If I tell the police about the video, all the other stuff will surface, too. I can’t take the chance that any of that gets out.”
“Agreed.” My ma sits next to me and moves my hair off my forehead. “Do you think Guns and Livianna will forgive you for this?”
I raise my gaze to my ma’s. “Eventually Guns will. Livianna… I don’t know. She seems to be moving on.”
“Why do you say that?”
A hole where my heart should be forms in my chest. “I found a condom box and some of them were gone. She’s been with someone else.”
“There could be another explanation.”
“Such as…?”
“Maybe she was carrying them for a friend.”
“Who knows?”
There’s a knock on the door. My ma gets up and answers it, and a woman stands on the other side.
“Hello. Can I help you?” Ma asks.
“Is Callum Mayze home?” The woman tries to peek inside.
What’s this about?
I stand and go to the door. “I’m Callum Mayze. What can I do for you?”
She holds out an envelope. “This is for you.”
I take it with my brow furrowed. “What is it?”
“You’ve been served.” She turns and leaves the property.
“Fucking hell. Now what?” I rip the envelope and pull out the papers.
My ma tries to read them. “What does it say, Bubba?”
I review the legal document and my chest caves in. “This can’t be right. There’s no way she would do this.”
“What?”
“Livianna.” My pulse zooms. “I’ve gotta go figure this out.”
I tuck the papers in the back pocket of my jeans and race to Livianna’s house. It’s not the smartest thing to do, but I’m not gonna let her go. She’s part of me and I won’t walk away.
I park my car and jog to the front door. Expecting it to be unlocked like it always is, I try to open it. It doesn’t budge.
I ring the doorbell and pound on the wood with the palm of my hand. “Livianna, we need to straighten this out. Let me in and let’s talk this out like we always do.”
A minute passes with nothing happening, so I start the process over. The door swings open.
Bren’s apathetic expression comes into view. “What do you want, Cash? For us to call the cops?”
“What the fuck, Guns?” I reach into my back pocket and show Bren the papers. I smack the folded document with the back of my hand. “Do you know what these are?”
“I do.” He blocks the opening to their house so I can’t enter. “That’s why I’m surprised you’re standing on our porch.”
“You can’t agree with this.”
“Why? You’ve hit her in the face twice now and can’t seem to get it through your head. You being around her causes her pain.”
“Guns, she filed a temporary restraining order on me.” My chest tightens. “You know I didn’t mean to touch her.”
“Yeah, but you did.”
“She really fucking did this?” All my hope drains from my limbs and I shake my head. “This is what she wants? She wants to break apart our connection and make it impossible for me to work it out with her?”
“She’s the one who chose to file, so I’m assuming she doesn’t wanna see or talk to you until the hearing. Possibly longer.”
“Fucking hell.” A flash of fire zips through my stomach. “Should I expect a statutory rape charge next?”
“No. She wouldn’t go that far.” His gaze falls to the ground and for a brief second, my best friend shows up. “I’m sorry, bro. I never thought it would come to this.”
“Then help me fix it.”
“I can’t.” He straightens his back and connects his cold glare with mine. “Cash, follow the law or she’ll go to court and that temporary restraining order will become a permanent one.”
The air in my lungs is forced out of me as if she hit me in the back with a steel beam. My throat dries out and I go numb all over.
“Guns, I can’t lose her. Don’t let this happen.”
“Cash, give her the time and space she needs. If it’s meant to be, it’ll work itself out.”
I reach for some leverage. “How are we supposed to practice if I can’t be here? We jam in your basement.”
“We’ll figure out something.” He starts to shut the door.
“Guns, please. I’m begging you. Talk her out of this.”
He peers through a crack in the opening. “Text me later. That’s the best I can do.”
He disappears behind the glass and wood barrier between us. I stand frozen, staring at the door, praying she’ll change her mind and open it.
I leave a couple of minutes later with every part of me turning to ash and blowing away with the wind. My soul is empty and I’m left with nothing.
I can’t say I blame her for wanting nothing to do with me. Any decent man would’ve stopped the abuse sooner. I haven’t. That’s on me. Even I’m disgusted with myself.
I return home and shuffle into the house. “Ma, can you get me some painkillers?”
“Bubba…” She steps out of the kitchen. “You’ve been clean and doing well. Are you sure—”
“Just get them for me. I have a migraine and need some relief.”
“Okay, honey. Lie down on the sofa and I’ll get a couple for you.”
“Make it three.” I pull off my boots and stretch out on the couch.
Memories of the good times I shared with Livianna wisp through my mind. How did our relationship get so fucked up?
Leon fucking Baker.
I wanna be pissed at my ma and my uncle for allowing him to enter my life. But the truth is, if they had tried to keep me away from him, I would’ve found a way to get involved with him on my own.
Every bad thing that’s happened between us goes straight back to him. Well, there is one thing that my uncle is responsible for.
I say I forgive him, but deep down I resent the fuck out of him for hurting Livianna and causing her to lose our child.
I don’t care if Leon fed him with meth and sat around telling him how Livianna was screwing everything up.
But Leon wanted me for himself and needed her out of my life. He used my uncle and he got what he wanted.
My muscles tense and heat rolls through me. My sadness turns into anger. I push myself up to go have it out with him right as my ma strolls back into the room.
She holds out a glass of water and three painkillers. “Take these, my precious son, and let me take care of you.”
“Thanks, Ma.” I snag them from her, slam the pills down, and realize I need her comfort. “Let’s hope these kick in fast or else I’m gonna murder someone.”
“Get up, asshole.” Guns flicks on my bedroom light. “You’ve been holed up here for a week and a half. It’s time to get off your ass and live a little.”
I push the notebooks I’ve been writing lyrics in onto the floor and lift myself up. “Why are you here, Guns?”
“We start working on tracks in five days. I figured you needed some motivation to share what you’ve come up with.”
“Why is that my responsibility?”
“You agreed when we formed Mayhem that you were gonna be the songwriter.” He wanders over to my dresser and leans against it. “You going back on your commitment?”
“Fuck Mayhem.” I scoot back and rest against the headboard. “Starting this band was when everything went to shit.”
“Quit feeling sorry for yourself. Nobody has died, have they?”
If he only knew how wrong he was, he’d regret saying that. My pops’ suicide happened because he was in the very situation I’m in.
I glare at Bren’s insensitive audacity and try to bring myself out of my painkiller-induced haze.
He shifts and clears his throat. “Sorry, bro. I wasn’t thinking when I said that.”
“Whatever.”
“Seriously, Cash. If I had any brains, I would’ve thought about where that comment would take you.” He gives me a sincere chin dip in respect for my pops.
“What’s done is done, mate. Let’s drop the subject.”
“You got it.” He glances around my room and dials in on the pill bottle on my nightstand. “You having issues with your head again?”
“What’s it to you?”
“I’m here to check on you. Nobody has seen or heard from you since you were served.”
“And that’s my problem, why?”
“Dammit, Cash. Help me out. What’s it gonna take to get you back to the land of the living?”
I run my fingers through my matted hair. “The last time I saw you, we weren’t on the best terms.”
“Yeah, I know.” He strides over and sits on the edge of my bed. “Livianna and I talked. We both know you didn’t mean to nail her in the face. But, dude, your anger scares the fuck out of us. If you don’t get a handle on it, I’m afraid you’re gonna kill someone someday.”
“Hopefully, it’ll be Sebastian or Leon.” It just slips from my lips without my thinking about what damage it could cause.
Bren studies me as I stare at him with an expression made of stone.
He nudges me. “Go shower and let’s get out of here. You need a change of scenery.”
“I’m not stepping one foot in the studio.”
“We’re going to the bar.” He pulls his phone out of his jeans pocket. “I’ll text Hawke and Cooper to let them know we’re having a band meeting. You need a best friend intervention.”
“I’m too tired.”
“Then take some of this.” He digs into his other pocket and pulls out a bag of coke. “Wake up and get ready. I’m giving you a reality check.”
I shrug, take the blow, and disappear into the bathroom. Even I know I can’t stay in my room forever.