Chapter 11
“Charity.”
Duncan had called her into a meeting with him a few days later. She had nervously shown up and was loitering near the door when he called out her name.
“You can come in, you know,” he said, looking amused. Their last conversation had ended rather abruptly and she wasn’t sure if he was still offended. “I am not going to harm you.”
“I never said that you will,” she said, stepping in quickly.
“Then why are you always looking for ways to avoid me?” he stood up, and walked towards her. With his tall frame, he towered over her easily, which made her blush.
Now is not the time.
“I suppose… well…”
“Do I make you nervous?” he asked, and it caught her off guard. He was in close enough proximity to her that she felt that any lie that would roll off her tongue would be caught instantly.
“I suppose you do,” she admitted.
“I don’t mind that much,” he said, and there was a ghost of a smirk on his lips.
“I beg your pardon?”
“Well, it is a step up from you being scared of me, which I don’t think you ought to be. But nervousness is different,” he shrugged, “flattering, almost.”
“Flattering?” she looked at him, flabbergasted. “I did not take you to be someone who flatters easily.”
“I’m not,” he said. “But then again, you don’t seem to be someone who gets nervous often either.”
She blushed at that and looked away. He gestured for her to sit down, and then took the seat opposite her.
“I called you in because I knew that you wouldn’t come to me yourself, even though that is something that you should start doing. But still,” he said, looking at her closely, “I wanted to know how you’re doing, and if you’ve done more overthinking, and found yourself in another imagined debacle.”
She narrowed her eyes at him. Yes, she had a knack for overthinking matters, but the fact that he had picked up on it so easily made her feel a kind of way. Not bad, but not amazing either. Just a bit exposed, if anything.
“I suppose you have figured me out.”
“Not entirely,” he shrugged, “I still find you rather puzzling, but some things, yes. I know that you’re still worried about your sisters, even though I have told you that you need not to be anymore.”
Charity sighed and bit down on her lip.
“I’ve just… I know you say that this is your territory, but I’m worried that… my uncle will attempt to do something.”
“So you’re still thinking about sending your sisters away?”
“We have been here three days, they are still jumping at footsteps in the hall, Augusta is watching every servant as though she expects them to report back to Edward, and Matilda has asked me twice whether she will be scolded for opening the wrong door, so yes, I am thinking about it.”
“And you think that they are still very frightened of me?”
“They might be, or they might not be,” Charity sighed. “But the fact of the matter remains that they are still in this home and my uncle is out there.”
“Charity,” Duncan said. “I cannot keep having this conversation with you. It would be the worst idea to send them away, someplace where I cannot monitor the situation.”
“But…” Charity tried to argue. “But well, it would be better for me, I think. It would give me some peace of mind that they are not being immediately targeted.”
“Out of sight and out of mind?”
Charity felt her cheeks flush at the implication.
“That is not what I mean in the slightest,” she argued back. “Sending them away doesn’t mean that they will not be on my mind constantly.”
“Very well. Let me humor you for a moment,” he nodded, “suppose we are to send them away, where do you reckon that place might be?”
Charity felt stumped. She did not have a clear answer to that yet.
“I don’t know,” she admitted, “perhaps you have a friend that can take them in.”
“Oh?” Duncan raised his eyebrows. “So you think that they will be safer with a friend of mine than they are here?”
“No, well… I am only saying that they will not be a target there,” she admitted. “It will be better, perhaps.”
“I cannot even begin to explain to you how wrong you are.”
“Yes, we often don’t agree,” Charity looked up at him.
It was something that she had realized. Their relationship was one that was based on frequent disagreements.
Surely, that was not what he had been expecting when he had signed up for a marriage with her.
“Let’s assume that we do send them off,” Duncan said. “As you say. But then what will happen to you?”
“Me?” Charity blinked, startled.
“Yes. You. Where do you go?”
“Nowhere?” she replied, confused. “Unless you would rather wish for me to?”
“I haven’t said that,” he said coyly. “So then you remain with her? Without your sisters?”
“Yes, well,” she was growing more and more flushed now. “I agreed to marry you, and I don’t see how a marriage between us would work if I were to be in another place entirely. So yes, I would remain here.”
“And how often would you see your sisters?”
Charity realized what he was doing.
“You’re rather clever, aren’t you?” she said, shaking her head. “You’re making me think through my suggestions in a way that I haven’t yet.”
“Yes, and I’m rather surprised that you haven’t, considering your hobby of overthinking matters.”
Duncan stood up then.
“Charity, I need you to trust me regarding things,” he said. “I know that you say that you want to be considered for decisions. But I have seen the world, and I know things that you might not. You need to trust me.”
Charity was quiet for a moment.
“Do you consider me na?ve?”
“Now you’re putting words in my mouth,” Duncan shook his head. “When did I say that you were na?ve?”
“You wouldn’t be the first to assume that,” she sighed. “I... you know, before my sisters and I were reunited, I had spent most of my life in a nunnery. It was a rather sheltered life, and I suppose it made me incapable of looking at the larger picture in some situations, like this one.”
It was a big thing for her to admit something like this but somehow, it had come easily to her.
Strange. It was easy to open up to Duncan. That was perhaps the most surprising realization of them all.
Duncan was quiet for a moment and then finally spoke up.
“You are not at the nunnery anymore, and nor are you at your uncle's house. I would like to make it clear that you are a free person in this house,” he said. “So stop thinking yourself as a caged bird.”
Charity sighed, rubbing the sides of her arms.
“I suppose I can be rather neurotic about things,” she nodded. “And you’ve signed up for a lifetime of this by agreeing to marry me.”
“I am sure that I come with some faults of my own,” Duncan replied.
Charity tried to rake through her mind to find a fault with him, but did not arrive at one.
“I think you have more of a reputation issue,” she said after a moment.
That seemed to pique the duke's interest, though he tried to maintain a neutral expression.
“And what do you mean by that?”
Charity considered her words carefully.
“When I first met you, I had the most startling image of you,” she said. “Like... I thought you were something to be terrified of, but the more I get to know you, I find that is not the case. You are not nearly as terrifying as you appear to be.”
Something shifted between them at her confession.
“Is that high praise coming from you?” He said after a moment.
“I don’t know what it is. You may make of it as you like.”
Duncan sighed.
“I suppose I can appear to be rather terrifying,” he agreed. “And I like to keep it that way.”
“But not with me,” she said and was surprised by the intimacy of her own statement. “I mean to say… well… if we are to have a marriage between us, then what is the use to keep up appearances?”
Duncan looked at her in a manner that unsettled her. But in a good way.
“I think you see past my appearances.”
Charity could not help but blush at that, though she could not find a response.
“You don’t think that’s true?” he prodded further.
“I think it is,” she said. “I’m realizing that myself.”
“I suppose that… well, I suppose that this relationship between us is full of surprises, isn’t it?”
Charity wanted to ask so many questions. She looked at him and then looked away.
“Are you overthinking again?”
“Perhaps I am,” she said. “What’s it to you?”
“I don’t want my future wife overthinking like this,” he said. “So, for the time being, I am going to make the decisions for you, until you are able to see and think through things in a clear manner.”
She could only nod.
Only Duncan could make her agree. It was strange; they came to an agreement and argued all the same. Their connection was full of polarities.
And maybe that was what made it so interesting.
“They stay,” he said to her. I want you to stop treating my protection as if it is temporary,” he said.
“I want you to stop acting as if Edward can reach through these walls whenever he pleases, because he cannot, and I want you to tell your sisters, calmly and plainly, that they are not going back.”
“I do tell them,” she said. “I tell them every day.”
“Good, then hopefully they will start to believe it soon.”
Augusta was not meant to hear the conversation. But she had caught the gist of it and confronted her sister as soon as she was able to find a moment alone with her.
“I heard you both,” she said, frowning. “You were talking about sending us away.”
“Augusta,” Charity chided. “Haven’t I told you that it is not good manners to eavesdrop?”
“I don’t think that it counts as eavesdropping if I have a stake in the conversation,” Augusta shrugged her shoulders. “Besides, since you do not include me in these conversations, it is best if I find my own way to become privy of them.”
“Did anyone see you?” Charity asked, concerned. “It would not be a good impression if people spotted you eavesdropping like this.”
Augusta rolled her eyes.
“You care far too much about what people think,” she said, “and not enough about our opinions. Besides, you’ve avoided my question entirely. When were you going to tell us that you were thinking of sending us away?”