Then
I am—
Hearing. Halle’s first laughs. Round little baby, deep belly chuckles at Papa’s silly faces. Contagious chuckles. Until all four of us are laughing.
I am—
Telling my secrets to Orion on our rooftop. Tucked in the shade beneath a borrowed blanket scrap. A fort, a sanctuary made just for the two of us. Skinned knees. Joined hands. Rust under our nails. Promising to always be together.
I am—
Hiding my face. Dusty tear tracks I don’t want Dani to see. Her thumb on my cheeks, wiping them dry. Cupping my chin long after it’s necessary. Neither of us moving as we meet each other’s eyes and understand.
I am—
Sleeping. Curled up with my sisters. The sound of Mama’s and Papa’s soft breathing. The room, safe. The night air, cool. Back then. To know what a cool breeze felt like.
I am—
Alone. Lying on a rooftop. Every night hotter than the one before.
Waiting …