Chapter 30 - Enzo
"Enzo, why did you let this happen to me?" Livia asks, her hands covered in blood.
I look around frantically, not knowing where I am.
"Livia, I'm sorry. You were never meant to get hurt. I, I don't know how this —"
"You were going to send me away. Did I mean nothing to you?"
"No," I say trying to move forward but can't, "you meant everything to me. I just, fuck, I just didn't handle it well. The diary, what you read, it just…"
"I cared for you and now look," Livia says raising her hands, blood dripping from them, "Look at what you caused."
"Livia, I -"
"Boss…Boss, wake up."
I blink my eyes open and in Livia's place is Simon, one of the men Gio put to guard my door. I look around confused and realize I'm in my office.
"What, what time is it?" I ask rubbing my eyes.
"It's 4am. I think you were having a dream. You were mumbling loudly."
"What was I saying?"
Simon shakes his head, "I couldn't make it out, but maybe you should go get some rest."
I stand up and stretch. I've been locked in here since the news of Livia's capture. I've sent my brothers, Gabriel, and others out to do what needs to get done in order to prepare.
I must have passed out on my couch after.
I nod, "wake me with any intel."
"Yes, sir."
I make my way to the room I've been sleeping in, but stop. I decide to head to the bed I'd shared with Livia.
When I enter, it feels strange. It's been days since I've been in here and now I'm in here alone.
My feet feel heavy as I approach the bed. I sit and sink into the mattress. Her scent instantly envelops me and for a moment, I can almost feel her here with me.
I take a deep breath, fill my lungs with her smell.
I've faced countless enemies, made decisions that have cost lives, but this, this feels different. This feels like a piece of me has been ripped away.
"Fuck," I whisper to the empty room.
I lie back on the bed and memories flood my mind - her laugh, her body curved against mine in sleep, her soft sighs when I'd kiss her neck, the way she'd pretend to be annoyed when I disturbed her reading.
Each recollection is a dagger to my heart, a reminder of what I've lost - of what I've allowed to be taken from me.
As I lay there in my thoughts, the realization hits me like a freight train.
I love her.
The truth of it crashes over me like a wave. Love. Such a simple word for such a complicated emotion. I've spent my entire life avoiding it, seeing it as weakness, watching how it destroyed people's lives. Love makes you vulnerable. Love makes you stupid. Love gets you killed in this business.
And yet here I am, brought to my knees by it.
I roll over, burying my face in her pillow, inhaling deeply. My chest feels like it's being crushed under this revelation.
I remember the first time I saw her, the fire in her eyes. The way she'd absently twist her hair while reading in the library. How she'd steal glances at me over dinner when she thought I wasn't looking. The softness in her voice when she'd said my name in the dark.
Is she scared right now?
Is she hurt?
The thoughts make my stomach turn. I've seen what the Rossis do to their enemies. The methods they use to extract information, to cause pain. If they've touched a single hair on her head, I'll…
I sit up abruptly, rage coursing through my veins like liquid fire.
This isn't just about business anymore. This isn't about territory or respect or power.
This is personal. The Rossis thought they could hurt me by taking her?
I'll show them what true pain is. I'll make examples of them that will be talked about for generations.
"I'll burn this whole fucking city down," I growl into the darkness. "I'll paint the streets red with Rossi blood."
She's my person. She's mine. My Livia. My family.
"I'm coming for you, cara mia," I say. "And heaven help anyone who stands in my way."