Chapter 22 #2
Walking past the boiler room, I went into the holding ward.
There weren’t many patients in there, but one – a man in his fifties with a bushy moustache – was sitting up in bed scribbling furiously in the book.
His skin had a greyish tinge and he kept stopping to breathe in sharply.
He was obviously in pain. I exchanged an alarmed glance with the nurse hovering by his bedside and she rolled her eyes.
‘Mr Hobbs here has appendicitis,’ she said pointedly.
‘And they’re ready to take him into theatre, but he’s got something to write first.’
I made a face. ‘Sorry,’ I said. ‘That’s my doing. It’s my book.’
‘Oh well done.’ She beamed at me. ‘It’s such a good idea. Make sure you look after it, won’t you?’
‘I will.’
Mr Hobbs finished his writing with a flourish and snapped the book shut. ‘There,’ he said, leaning back against his pillow in exhaustion. ‘Message for the wife, just in case, you know?’
‘I know,’ the nurse said fondly. ‘Having your appendix out is a routine op, though. I’m sure your wife won’t be reading that note.’ She patted his arm in reassurance and took the book from him. ‘I’ll get a porter to take you through to theatre.’
‘I’ll find Frank for you, if you like,’ I said, taking the book as she held it out to me. ‘I’m heading up to the wards now.’
‘No, not Frank, the new chap. He’s around somewhere – I just saw him.’
‘If I see someone, I’ll send them down. Good luck, Mr Hobbs.’
He nodded to me and with the book under my arm, I hurried off again, totally forgetting to look for a porter in my eagerness to get to Nelly.
*
She was awake when I got to her room. Another nurse was there, adjusting her sheets, and I greeted her.
‘Nelly’s awake, aren’t you, love?’ she said. I didn’t recognise her and I didn’t like how she raised her voice a bit and spoke as though Nelly was simple.
She turned to me. ‘She can’t talk but she’s responsive.’
‘It wasn’t her brain that was burned,’ I said sharply and the nurse narrowed her eyes at me like an irritated cat. ‘Sorry. It’s been a long day.’
The nurse nodded in understanding though she still looked a bit annoyed.
‘Brought the book, Nell,’ I said. ‘Thought we could look at it together.’
‘Don’t tire her out,’ the nurse warned.
‘I won’t.’
I waited until she was outside the room and then I sat down next to Nelly’s less injured side, smoothing the book’s cover with my fingertips. I opened it on a random page. ‘Let’s have a look, shall we? It’s been all over the hospital.’
Next to me, Nelly’s eye widened slightly. ‘Want me to read some of the notes?’ I asked. Her fingers twitched.
‘Your wish is my command.’
I read a few of the cheerier messages. The ones that were memories or funny anecdotes.
I didn’t want any of the gloomy last words for loved ones.
Not today. When I came across the note Mr Hobbs had left, I scanned it, wondering what had been so important but feeling a bit like I was invading his privacy as I did. The note made me chuckle.
‘Listen to this, Nell,’ I said. ‘This chap was writing before he had his appendix out earlier on. I thought it was a loving message to his wife, but it’s instructions about how to feed his chickens.’
I laughed but Nelly looked as though she was drifting off to sleep, so I thought I should leave her be.
‘I’ll get off,’ I whispered. ‘I’ll come back tomorrow.’
She opened her eye fully and tapped her fingers on the bedclothes to show she was pleased.
‘We need to work out a code, like two taps for no and one for yes,’ I said. ‘Just until you can talk again.’
Nelly tapped once and I grinned. ‘You’ve got it already.’
I went to shut the book but as I did, I noticed some of the pages were stuck together. Poking out of the top of the pages was a scrap of paper, like a bookmark. ‘Oh, look at that,’ I grumbled. ‘Not everyone is as careful as I am.’
Using my hand like a letter opener I ran it between the pages and peeled them apart.
They separated easily. I rubbed my finger and thumb together.
It felt slightly gritty, like … I sniffed my finger …
and it smelled like tea. Was it a drink that had sealed the pages together?
Perhaps one of the patients had spilled something.
But it was only on the edges of the paper and it felt more deliberate than accidental.
‘This is odd,’ I said aloud to Nelly, whose eye was still open. ‘Look, someone’s stuck the pages together. Do you think they wanted their message to be private?’
She tapped her finger lightly on her sheet and I nodded. ‘I think you’re right. I feel a bit bad now, that I’ve found it. But … oh. Oh goodness.’
I felt my cheeks burn as I looked at the scrap of paper that had been marking the page. It said “To my favourite nurse” in tiny writing. ‘I think this might be a message to me, Nelly.’ Was it? Or was I being presumptuous? And who had written it?
Nell tapped her hand on to the bed impatiently, but I ignored her, lost in my own thoughts. With a lurch of discomfort I wondered if somehow Jackson had found the book and written me a note. But I scanned it, and realised with a great deal of relief, that wasn’t the case.
‘It’s not from Jackson, I’m sure. But it isn’t signed,’ I said to Nelly. She drummed her fingers again. I shook my head.
‘I’m not even convinced it’s for me.’
Nelly thumped her hand on the bedclothes and I grinned. ‘Shall I read it aloud?’
‘If we were in normal times, I would ask you to a dance or to the pictures,’ I read. ‘But times are not normal and I worry that they will never be normal again.’
I paused and glanced at Nelly to make sure she was all right. She was still, but her eye was open. She was listening. I carried on. ‘I think you’re lovely, and I’d like to get to know you. Your idea to pass this book around the wards was so clever and thoughtful – I want to know more about you.’
I paused, pleased to have confirmation that the note was definitely meant for me. ‘But I know it’s awkward with you being a nurse and me a patient so I thought we could use this book to share our thoughts. What do you reckon?’
I felt hot again on my cheeks. Could it be from Harry? Or was I being ridiculous? ‘It’s sweet, I think,’ I said to Nelly. She tapped her finger once. ‘But I don’t know who it is. It could be anyone. It could be one of the old men from upstairs, or a youngster playing a prank. Should I write back?’
Nelly tapped her finger with a surprising amount of vigour. ‘That’s a yes then?’ I said with a chuckle.
She tapped again. ‘Fine,’ I said. ‘I’ll write back and stick the pages together again.’ I thought for a moment. ‘But with no idea who’s written this note, I’ve got no way of knowing when it would find its way to him. I’ll just have to send it off round the wards again and see what happens.’
Nelly breathed in deeply and I looked at her. ‘Are you loving this?’ I said to her. ‘It’s right up your street, isn’t it?’
She tapped her finger and I grinned. ‘Has Percy been in to see you?’
There was a pause and then she tapped again, twice this time. I kicked myself for asking. ‘He’ll come,’ I assured her. ‘He’s a good bloke.’
Nelly made a noise, deep in her throat. A sort of moan.
‘You don’t want him here?’ I said.
She tapped her finger twice again.
‘All right,’ I said. I understood that she didn’t want Percy to see her looking so badly hurt. ‘You tell me when you’re ready to see him and I’ll let him know.’
She walked her fingers along the sheet and clasped my hand in hers.
‘And I’ll reply to the message,’ I said, wanting to distract her. ‘I promise.’
Nelly squeezed my fingers and then let go.
‘We need to take Nelly for a bath now.’ One of the nurses stood in the doorway.
Nelly moaned again.
‘Now?’ I said. ‘Really?’
‘I’m afraid so. We’ll give you some painkillers, Nelly. I know it’s not nice, but it’s important to keep your burns clean.’
A tear trickled out from Nelly’s eye. ‘Be brave,’ I said to her. ‘Do you want me to stay?’
She took my hand again but the nurse shook her head. ‘We can’t have too many people in the room. The risk of infection is too high.’
‘Sorry, Nell,’ I said.
She made the horrible moaning sound again and I wanted to cry for her.
‘The porter’s on his way,’ the nurse said. ‘Let’s get you ready, shall we?’
I kissed her hand and said goodbye, hearing her moans follow me all the way along the corridor.