Chapter Nine #3
She led the way to her third-floor apartment. After collecting Lucy and locking her in the second bedroom, she left the door to the apartment open, then walked into the small kitchen and pulled two beers from the refrigerator. She’d barely started looking for the bottle opener when Ramon flew in.
“Can he be up here?” Marcus asked, holding out his hand for the parrot.
“He has free run of the place. I’ve been keeping him out while Lucy settles, but once they’re friends, he’ll be allowed back
in.”
“You have a good life,” he told Ramon. The bird nuzzled his hair then pressed his beak to his cheek.
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.”
“Let me guess,” Marcus said. “The cat being the worst of times.”
Ramon shot Jax a little stink eye. “No cat!”
“You haven’t even met her yet. She’s lovely.”
Ramon blew a raspberry, then flew to the bookcase by the French doors.
“Open please.”
She crossed to the doors. Marcus followed.
“He goes outside? Is that safe?”
“I appreciate that you’re worried but he’s fine. Remember, the doors to the bookstore are open all the time. Ramon doesn’t
go anywhere. If he sees a friend, he’ll fly out to greet them, but otherwise, he sticks close to home. He’s a very good boy.”
The parrot flew to her shoulder, then rode her out to the widow’s walk. He hopped over to the perch left out for him, looked
around and proclaimed, “I’m king of the world!”
She and Marcus settled on the chaises. As promised, the sun had moved far enough north that this side of the building was
in shade. The temperature was still warm—in the low eighties—but there was a breeze and a view of the beach and ocean beyond.
Marcus gave a low whistle. “This is prime real estate.”
“Thanks. It’s a killer view for sure.”
“The apartment is plenty big,” he said. “You’ve got a good setup for the weeks you’re not with the kids.”
“I think so. I lived up here before Harris and I got married. Ramon has his private space on the second floor, so it works.
Once Harris and I were married, we moved in here until we bought the house.”
“Ramon must have missed you when you moved out.”
She glanced at her beautiful bird. “He did at first, but then he adjusted. He still had his cat, which helped and when Harris
was on the road, I moved back here a few days a week. I guess in a way, the apartment has always been home for the two for
us.”
“Do the kids ever stay here?”
She nodded. “There’s a second bedroom with two beds. We’re here for New Year’s Eve and the Fourth of July. Because of the
fireworks. I prefer my own bed, but now that the kids are older, they bunk down in one of the genre rooms. We also have teen
overnight parties in the bookstore, which Ramon loves. He hangs out with everyone, doing all the things and is exhausted and
cranky the next day.”
“Just like any four-year-old.”
“Exactly.”
“Albert!” Ramon flapped his wings, then whistled. “Albert!”
Marcus chuckled. “So Albert is here?”
“I guess.”
Ramon flew off the widow’s walk and down toward the sidewalk, all the while calling, “Albert! Albert!”
“Now Albert will be forced to come into the store,” Marcus said.
“Not just come in, but spend a few minutes with his favorite bird. Maybe he’ll stop for a coffee and find a book he might
enjoy.”
“You’re saying Ramon is in on the con.”
She laughed. “Con seems so strong. It’s more of a very charming and wonderful sales campaign.”
“Does Ramon get monthly bonuses?”
“I pay him in chicken bones and mango.”
“I’m going to stick with Zelle.”
“But I have a whole bag of chicken bones in the freezer.” She sipped her beer. “So tell me about your divorce.” She paused,
then smiled. “Wow, I’m channeling my inner Lindsey.”
She kept her gaze on the view, but felt Marcus turning to stare at her.
“No foreplay? Just right to the point?” he asked, his voice teasing.
“I’m curious.”
“Because you want me to date your sister.”
She sighed, thinking she wanted that less and less. Or rather she did want Ryleigh to be happy but maybe with someone else. Except Marcus was all the things so how could Ryleigh not want him?
“I think you’d be a cute couple,” she murmured, ignoring the sudden knot in her gut.
“Because you want her to stay in town and for that she needs a man.”
“Something like that.” She set down her beer and angled toward him. “My life was perfectly balanced. I was married with great
kids and the store and Ryleigh was dating a terrific new guy. Now I’m divorced and she’s talking about moving away. I can’t
take any more. I don’t miss Harris—the divorce was actually a good decision for all of us. But losing Ryleigh would be too
much.”
He studied her for a second. “The stool.”
“What?”
“You and Cheryl were talking before about a three-legged stool and how you’d only have two legs. That was about Ryleigh leaving.”
She drew back. “Okay, now you’re scaring me.
That’s way too insightful, but yes. I still have my kids and work, but if she moves, it won’t be the same.
I see her all the time. We do yoga and hang out.
She’s always been my best friend. It was hard enough when we were at college, but this would be so much worse.
Because college was finite. This would be forever. ”
She looked at him. “Any thoughts?”
“I’m not interested in your sister.”
“But you haven’t really spent time with her. She could be perfect for you.”
“Thanks, but no.”
Jax sagged back in the seat, telling herself she felt disappointment, not relief. “You’re being difficult on purpose. Fine.
We can let it go for now. So tell me about the divorce.”
“What do you want to know?”
“I don’t know. What was your wife like?”
“She was a computer programmer turned influencer.”
Unexpected, she thought. Marcus didn’t seem the influencer type. From what she could tell, he was more quiet than outgoing
and, despite his looks, didn’t seek attention.
“How did you meet?”
He looked away, then cleared his throat. “Online.”
“What?” Her voice came out as a yelp. She laughed. “You did online dating? Why? There are plenty of interested women right
here in town.”
He shrugged. “I’d gone through a bad breakup and couldn’t seem to shake the sense of having failed. The online thing was the
result of too many nights spent by myself. The next morning I got up and decided to delete my profile, but I already had a
few messages.”
“Sure. A few hundred.”
“There were a few,” he corrected. “I contacted her and we hit it off. Everything was great.”
“Until,” she prompted.
“Until she wanted more than what we had. About a year after we got married, she decided she wanted to be an influencer. It’s a big commitment, timewise, and it took over.
She was doing makeup videos and other stuff.
Boxes of products started showing up. Despite living in the same house, we saw less and less of each other.
Before I knew what was happening, we were living separate lives, which I didn’t like, but instead of talking to her about how I felt, I withdrew. ”
She sighed. “I’m sorry. The death of a marriage totally sucks.”
“It does. About then she started making serious money. She was talking about moving to LA.”
“And your life is here.”
He nodded. “So we agreed to end things. It made me sad. I wanted the relationship to work out but looking back I wonder if
it was doomed from the start. I think we both only saw what we wanted to see, rather than what was real. When we were signing
the papers, she said what she would miss the most was how well I photographed.”
“Really?” Jax winced. “That had to hurt.” Wouldn’t you want your spouse to miss more than that? “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. I’ve worked through it all. Next time I’ll get to know the person before I commit. I want someone in my life I
can respect, who respects me. Someone who’s a friend as well as a lover.”
“You have a plan,” she said, wondering if she should have one as well. A way to avoid making the same mistakes she had with
Harris.
“What about you?” he asked. “What do you want in a man?”
She blinked at him. “You mean for dating?” She considered the question. “I have no idea, mostly because I’ve been avoiding
even thinking about getting involved with anyone.”
“Why? It’s been over a year since the divorce. I don’t think you’re still in love with Harris.”
“God, no. In love with him?” She shuddered.
“He’s making bad decisions, just like he always did.
I’m happy to have things over.” She paused, realizing she’d made him out to be worse than he was.
“I mean he’s a great father. I’d rather have full custody of the kids, but he wouldn’t go for that.
He’s there for them, which I appreciate. ”
“What went wrong in your marriage?”
She sipped her beer. “Dozens of things. I want to say it was all him—that’s the story I’ve been telling myself—only I’m starting
to wonder if that’s true. We were in our marriage together so in theory I must have blame.”
She paused to think about the past. “He was gone a lot, which it turns out I really didn’t mind. It was his being home that
was difficult, probably because when he was around, I couldn’t be in charge. Sometimes it felt like he didn’t fit, if that
makes sense. Or maybe I didn’t want him to fit. It was like we had our rhythm and then he would show up and want to be a part
of things.”
“That bastard.”
She grinned. “I know, I know. That’s horrible of me. Harris had every right to be a member of the family. We fought a lot.
I thought we kept it from the kids, but it turns out we didn’t. They knew and it scared them. Which makes me feel like an
awful mom.”
“You’re not. You’re human, so you make mistakes, but on a day-to-day basis, you show up.”
“You can’t know that.”
He waved his beer toward her. “I can and I do. I’ve seen you with Ramon. He’s not an easy pet, but you’re in for him a hundred
percent. You live your life around his schedule. You’d be even more involved with your children. You’re a good mom for sure.”
“Thanks. I hope you’re right.”
And while she appreciated his kind words, a voice in the back of her head whispered that while she might be a decent parent,
she was starting to wonder if she’d been something of a crappy wife. And if she had been, what did that say about her?