Chapter 18 - Daria
It turned out that time went by much faster once I had something to focus on—especially since that something demanded my attention and easily sucked hours from me. I hardly even noticed it happening until I eventually realized most of the day was already gone.
With my efforts going into practicing drawing and painting again, I still didn't feel completely settled during those two weeks that passed, but I was in a much better place than I had been before.
To my surprise, Ivan tended to come home with less disdain for me in his gaze, and rather than find something to argue about, he was a lot more pleasant.
There were still moments where he'd withdraw and remove every trace of vulnerability from his words until he seemed to guard himself from me, but overall, there was less bite to his words. While he could still be teasing at times, he wasn't outright trying to torment me like he had been. He was more careful in general, and while that in itself took some getting used to, it certainly beat the constant state of fight or flight I had endured.
Of course, Ivan still wasn't very direct when it came to his thoughts and feelings, but I could tell something was changing in him. And in a way, I was grateful for it.
I may not have had any choice in our marriage or being yanked into his life, but so long as I didn't feel like a target was on my back, it was slowly becoming more bearable.
At the very least, I was putting my energy into art again, and it was nicer than I imagined. I had forgotten how much it meant to me, and how greatly it improved my mood regardless of what was going on around me.
Getting up that morning, already thinking about what I wanted to paint, something on the nightstand caught my eye.
Ivan was already up and gone to work, leaving me alone to investigate the small box beside me.
Rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I sat up and swung my legs over before reaching for the box. I slid the lid off to see a shiny new phone inside, already prepared with a case and everything.
Surprise and excitement moved through me simultaneously at the realization, aware of what that meant.
I couldn't believe it as I pulled the cell phone out and felt that familiar weight in my grasp again for the first time in weeks. I went from always having one on me to nothing, and it was definitely an adjustment.
With a faint smile, relieved to have a new one, I turned the screen on and swiped to open it.
Even if the default background gave away the fact that it lacked any kind of personal touch, I wasn't going to complain about how much nicer it was than my previous one.
I poked around, eventually going into the contact list and finding Ivan's number already there, pinned to the top. To my surprise, his siblings' numbers were also there, even though I didn't know them all, along with Dom's contact. I had to imagine it was a precaution.
Still, it felt strange. We were married, but I didn't feel like one of the family yet. I had only met Dima and Olivia, and of course, that didn't exactly end well.
If Ivan giving me a phone seemed like a small thing, I knew it meant he was beginning to trust me and allow me to have more freedom. In my situation, that meant a hell of a lot more to me than it should have.
When I inspected the phone inside and out, I eventually got up and had a shower, then dressed into something a bit more casual to keep myself from potentially ruining anything nice with paint.
But before I could leave the master bedroom, the phone surprised me with a notification, and I grabbed it from where I left it on the bed.
My brows furrowed slightly as I skimmed over the message at first, expecting it to be from Ivan. But upon closer inspection, I realized the number wasn't in my contacts.
The text read:
Need youR help...be ready.
At first, the confusion had me completely in its clutches until that single letter stood out to me. Then, it sank in, and my stomach dropped.
It wasn't random or a typo...no, it was perfectly intentional.
That was how my brother would let me know it was him contacting me whenever he used a different phone for whatever reason, and to prevent naming himself in the process just in case anything were to happen.
It had become a normal thing, but to see it again after knowing he was being held by the Fokins made me even more confused.
He had strings he pulled often, but how would he have gotten a cell phone where he was locked up?
It didn't make any sense.
There was a chance one of his men was trying to prepare me for something if it didn't come from Rurik directly, but even if that was the case, I didn't want anything to do with it.
The thought of hearing from my brother again after being without him for weeks made my stomach turn.
My hands shook faintly while I swiped to delete the message. Regardless of what was going on behind the scenes, I didn't want anything to do with it.
I didn't want to hear from or see Rurik. Not when I finally had the chance to be out of his clutches.
Going from my brother to Ivan didn't start out ideally; there were fundamental differences in how I had been treated by both, and after it was said and done, I didn't want to go back to how things were.
Regardless of his faults, Ivan seemed to be trying, and if the cell phone was any indication, he was starting to trust me.
Forcing the text out of my mind, I went about my business, grabbing breakfast before I made my way to my at-home studio.
After running my ideas by Ivan, I landed on a few pieces of furniture to occupy the space, along with some storage units, drying racks, and, of course, a few different easels, depending on what I needed them for. Along with the perfect natural light that came in through the windows, the room really did look like a studio, and it quickly became the room I frequented the most in the house.
I started the day off with some color theory and practiced manipulating oil paint since it was new to me. Then, I got started on a new piece. Of course, I still had that portrait Ivan wanted in the back of my mind, but I wanted to take my time on it.
Veronica had brought me lunch and different drinks throughout the day, asking me questions and looking over some of my work while she did.
While I didn't feel quite as guilty for pestering her as I had before when I had nothing better to do, I was beginning to miss our chats. Luckily, she would sometimes sit with me in the studio during her breaks, and it was nice to fall into that sort of routine.
Eventually, as the day grew later, I made my way to the living room to unwind a bit. With my phone in hand, I paused upon entering the space when I noticed something new about it.
My eyes widened slightly at the sight of one of my paintings hung up on the wall, right in line with the sitting area to provide the perfect view of it.
I was surprised to see it there, hanging like it was a painting worth millions that Ivan had snagged at an auction. Instead, it was something I made myself, and he was showcasing it like he would for something valuable.
I softened at the thought, unable to hold back how touched I was by it.
He didn't need to do anything remotely like that. He could've left the walls plain and empty like most other rooms in the house, confining my art to my studio. Yet, he was displaying it freely, and something about that made me feel a bit better about our situation.
"Looks nice up there, doesn't it?"
Glancing over my shoulder, I watched as Ivan approached with a light grin, moving to my side.
Still trying to grapple with the thoughtful gesture, I managed to nod before taking another look at it. "It does...but you didn't have to hang it up."
In a way, it was slightly embarrassing, almost like a parent hanging up a class project. But more so, it seemed like a sincere attempt to not only connect with my art but also with me.
And that was a nicer thought than I imagined.
Ivan hummed, then gently reached around me and put a hand against my hip while he inspected it alongside me. "Sure, I didn't have to, but I wanted to. I quite like that one, and I thought it deserved its own display."
I smiled, finding it harder to hold back how much it pleased me to hear him say that. "I appreciate it...and I'm glad it suits your taste."
His grin pulled more at that, and he nodded. "It's lucky your work seems to easily match my taste."
That insinuation stirred something in me, and I turned my attention back to the painting before it was obvious. Given how the warm lighting accentuated the piece and made it look more professional, my mind flitted back to a more nostalgic place.
"I always wondered what it would be like to have an exhibit. It must feel a bit daunting, but also exciting for so many others to come and view your work," I admitted in passing, easily recalling how dreamy that notion always felt to me.
Ivan nodded while he listened, almost like he was considering something, before glancing between me and the painting. "I'm sure it would be. And I can just imagine how successful your exhibit would be."
His subtle praise and faith in me had me smiling more than usual, and given how rarely he would give them out before, it almost felt like winning a prize every time.
We stood there together for a moment before I turned my attention to him.
"You've been very supportive about this, and are always asking questions about how it's going, but I still don't know much about you beneath the surface, even though we're married."
Ivan heard me out, and while part of me half expected him to be annoyed by me pointing it out, he nodded instead.
"You're right...but that's going to change," he murmured, giving me a look that seemed to promise exactly that. He gave me a small, knowing smile and gently squeezed my hip. "Go get something nice on. We're going out tonight."
Something about the prospect of going out always excited me, especially since he tended to take us to nice places. It always felt good to get out of the house.
While I didn't know what he had planned, the thought of seeing more of his world was incredibly enticing.
There had always been something so interesting about him and how he spent his time, and if he was prepared to share those pieces of himself with me, then I wasn't going to complain.