Chapter 13 - Bardil
She looks gorgeous in that little dress with her sneakers on. It reminds me of the night I took her. She was wearing a black dress then, too. The same sneakers.
Except tonight she's different. Or maybe it's just my perception of her that's different. I've gotten to know her, and she's not just a tool.
She is just the means to an end, Bardil. Don't let your thoughts get away with you.
Inside the bar, the music is pulsing and thick. Bass throbs in my chest. It feels good.
I shouldn't be here. It's risky. But after the fight with Simon, I needed to unwind.
Besides, I promised her adventures, and if this is what she wants, then whatever… It's what I need now, too.
Nikita is grinning happily. Her face is bright with excitement when I hand her a shot of tequila.
She downs it and scrunches her nose. I laugh, and she sticks her tongue out at me.
"If you don't like it, why did you drink it?" I ask, amused.
"Because you only live once, Bardil. And in all honesty, the more you say no, the less chance you have of experiencing everything life has to offer." She winks at me, then takes my hand and pulls me to the dance floor.
At first, I hesitate, but her energy and outlook on life have my feet following her before my mind can think of any logical reason not to.
She slips against me, wrapping her arms around my waist and moving her body in slow, seductive ways as the music moves through us.
There are many things in life that seem too good to be true because they are too good to be true.
She's one of those things. I can't let myself get lost in her.
This can't be real. An act to wear me down, maybe?
No one is this fun and this carefree. No one is this relaxed and ready to let go and enjoy themselves.
Or maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm the stuck-up one in this moment, and I need to let go for a while.
I keep a close eye on her, struggling with the way she's dancing. Her body is rubbing against mine, and every fiber of my being is on fire. I'm fighting urges I have to control.
Nothing about her seems fake, and it isn't long before I'm caught up in her personality and enjoying myself too.
Besides, she's fucking gorgeous and almost every guy in here is dying with jealousy to see her dancing with me. And she's mine. She's here with me. Dancing in my arms.
Nikita's face is glittering with a shine of perspiration when she pulls me off the dance floor and back toward the bar. "We need another shot," she shouts over the music.
"Let's go upstairs. We can sit in VIP for a while," I tell her, pulling her in the opposite direction.
The VIP area is busy, but quieter. The music isn't as loud in here, so we can hear each other speak. I order a bottle of champagne, and we sit on the sofa near the wall beneath a red light that makes her seem more mysterious and beautiful than ever.
Nikita is happy and relaxed. She sips her champagne and sits with her leg against mine, talking about life in a way that makes me want to show her the world. She's the type of person who makes everything seem more magical than it really is.
Around her, I don't feel like a Bratva boss. I don't feel burdened or worried. All I feel is her incredible energy, pulling me out into the world and making me see everything in a positive way.
I sigh, shaking my head. "I was grumpy tonight," I confess, chuckling.
"I know. You don't exactly hide it very well. Your face was like a thunder cloud," she giggles.
"I've been going through a lot of shit recently, and I can't get anyone in my family to take the time to hear me out. It's frustrating, you know."
"I actually do know. I often feel like no one really listens to me. I mean, I'm not in your position… but I understand being misunderstood," she says sympathetically.
For some reason, the look in her eyes makes me open up even more.
I find myself talking to her about what happened.
About how I got screwed over by people I trusted, how I'm angry at myself for letting my guard down when I know how brutal this world is. How it got me into trouble, and how I didn't want to drag my family into it, so I tried to fix it myself.
She listens attentively, her hand resting on my leg. It's a distraction and a comfort. Her fingers rest quietly, heat soaking between us.
The way she's looking at me has my heartstrings pulling me toward her. I want to kiss her so badly, to pull her into my arms and hold her.
Fuck. This isn't good. I shouldn't have brought her out here.
But tonight is incredible. This is more fun than you've had in years.
"You know, if you tried to talk to my brothers, they'd listen. They aren't bad people. Maybe you're misunderstanding them too… " she says, her bright blue eyes locked onto me. "You make them sound evil, but they're not." She shrugs.
Anger grates at me. Why the hell did she have to bring them up and defend them after what I've just told her? They stole my family from me. How is that ok?
I huff angrily and move away from her.
She notices immediately and sighs, rolling her eyes. "You're impossible, Bardil. You go on and on about how people don't understand you, but you're just as bad as them!" she snaps.
"Don't talk to me about your family as though they're innocent."
"Don't accuse them then. You want them to think you're not the bad guy, then you've got to make an effort as well."
I shake my head, my anger getting worse.
Standing up, I move away from the sofa and try to calm my thoughts, but she follows me.
"Dammit, Bardil. Can't you see how childish this is?" she complains.
"Childish? Who the hell are you talking to? You don't understand what I'm going through if you're still pushing your family's agenda onto me," I growl.
"I'm not pushing any agenda, you idiot. I'm only saying that there are two sides to every story and you're demanding people hear yours without also wanting to hear theirs." Her eyes are fierce and confrontational.
She puffs her chest out and tries to look taller as she squares up to me. Little rabbit. Half my size and trying to look intimidating.
I hate that it also makes her look so fucking sexy. All night she's been teasing me. All night she's been taunting me and making me fight for self-control.
"Nikita?" A guy's voice drags my attention off her.
She spins to look at him. "Stalone?" She smiles. My hackles rise as he walks toward us, his eyes on Nikita.
"Are you ok… Is this guy bothering you?" he asks. My instincts are screaming at me to punch him in the face.
"No, um, I'm… "
I move against her side and slip my arm around her, pulling her tight against me. No asshole is going to come and interfere with us. No one is pulling her away from me. She's mine.
"We're fine here," I snap.
"I was asking the girl," he snaps back.
"The girl? Where's your respect?" I snarl darkly. "She has a name."
"Nikita?" he asks, looking away from me. "Is this guy bothering you?"
"I'm fine," she sighs, rolling her eyes. I hold her tighter, my body humming with her at my side. I can feel the curve of her hip beneath my hand, the heat of her skin.
"She said she was fine," I demand.
"Fuck sakes, I don't have time for this," the guy groans, shaking his head. He glances at Nikita again, and she smiles, shrugging. "I'm really fine," she says again.
"Whatever," he grunts, backing off. He never stood a chance against me anyway. No one does. Especially not when they're trying to interfere with something that belongs to me.
He walks away, and Nikita spins to confront me about it. "Stop acting like you own me!" she blurts out. But before she has a chance to say another word, I grab her jaw and kiss her.
The possessive sensations pulsing through me are heightened by adrenaline, need, and the insatiable desire to have her.
I've been controlling myself all night. But now… I can't anymore. I can't resist her for another second.
And to make things even worse, Nikita melts against me and doesn't hesitate to kiss me in return.
The moment our lips touch, a fire spreads through me. Each flame licking away at that control until there is none left.
Her fingers are knotted in my shirt, tugging, pulling me even closer. She moans against my mouth, and new sensations vibrate through me.
This is too much to bear.
She is too much to bear.
The burden of restraint leaves me as I run my hands down her back, over the curve of her spine and arch of her ass.
Fuck, she is perfect in every single way.
I need to get her out of here, to take her home.
But even as I think it, I know it isn't going to happen. There's no stopping what I've started. There is only this one carnal thought spinning through my mind. Take her. Now.
Nikita stands on her tiptoes and wraps her hands around my neck. She brushes her nails along the back of my shoulders, creating goosebumps over my skin.
I step away from her, breathless. Taking her hand, I pull her to follow me, and she does so without a word of protest.
There are private VIP sections, and it's the best place I can think of right now before I end up fucking her against the railing overlooking the dance floor.
I pull her around the corner into the hallway of glowing red lights. Connected to it are private VIP sections, but none of them have doors. There is no guaranteed privacy.
It will have to do.
The last few rooms are empty, so I pick the furthest one. Inside is a low table surrounded by a wide, circular leather sofa, which runs along the wall of the room.
The lights are red in here, too. The room glows with a lustful energy. Red on her skin. Red reflecting in her bright, wide eyes as she stares up at me, her lips parted, her breath heavy.
All I care about is that we're alone as I drag her back into my arms and press my lips onto hers once more.
She moans, loud and desperate as I push my tongue into her mouth.
My cock is achingly hard. Throbbing and bulging against my pants.
I lift Nikita and spread her legs around my waist, my fingers dipping between her legs and brushing over her panties. In my arms, her entire body shivers with pleasure, and I press my fingers harder against her sweet, swollen little clit.
I push her back against the wall and hook my finger into her panties, tugging them aside so I can brush my fingers against her skin.
Smooth, soft, and warm. Delightfully soaked with her lust. I pull my hand away, and she gasps, but when I dip my fingers into my mouth to taste her, her eyes go wide with surprise.
"Fuck me… It's like honey," I growl.
Suddenly, the urge to have my lips against her pussy is the only thing I can think about.
Pulling her away from the wall, I drop her onto her back on the low table and kneel between her legs. Dragging her ass to the edge, I lift her legs, hooking them over my shoulders as I push my face between her thighs.
Nikita gasps loudly when I tug her panties aside again, and this time it's my tongue that licks against her. She arches her hips toward my face. My cock is painfully hard.
I'm going to fuck her like a wild animal.
I'm going to ravage every inch of her body because it's all I've been thinking about for weeks.
My tongue circles over her sweetness as her clit swells in my mouth.
I drag my tongue down, then thrust it into her pussy.
She shudders and cries out. I push it in deeper.
Again and again, pushing, pulling, fucking her with my mouth and licking up the juices of her pleasure as they shine on my lips.
She is a drug. A drug pushing me to insanity. To the point of no return.