11. Calla
ELEVEN
CALLA
Our next stop is Salt Lake City. The entire day moves so quickly I barely have time to blink before we’re headed to Colorado, where we actually get to spend the night in a hotel. Nights on the bus are hard, so I’ve been looking forward to this.
Luke and I take the elevator to the floor we’re staying on. Of course, his room is right next to mine because, as Ashley told me, “What’s the point of a bodyguard if he’s not near you at all times?”
Luke has been annoyingly close to me ever since I attempted to go out in Vegas. I realize it probably wasn’t my best decision to try to sneak out, but I was desperate. And desperate women make desperate choices.
We stop at my room first. Luke unlocks the door with the key card and does what he calls his routine check while I wait by the door until he’s finished.
The room is nice. I typically like to request a suite so there’s a separate living area from the bedroom. People are in and out of my room all the time, so it’s nice for me to have a separate place to have to myself.
Luke drops his bag. “Perfect. I’m sleeping on the couch.”
I look at him with wide eyes. “What? You have your own room.”
“Yep, but I still don’t trust you not to run off, Calla. I’ll be sleeping right here so I’ll hear if you try to sneak out.”
“Are you serious?” I ask in disbelief.
“Dead serious.” He looks at me without an ounce of humor in his eyes.
I groan and roll my suitcase into the bedroom. I don’t want him in my room. I don’t want anyone in my room. I want to be alone.
“Come on,” Luke calls from the living room after I’ve taken a little too long to get settled in my room for the night. “I’m hungry. We’re going to get lunch.”
I walk back out to the living room and find him looking at something on his phone.
“Am I allowed to go get lunch?” I ask. Ashley typically has every meal planned out. I should be expecting a very unsatisfying salad to be delivered to my room at any moment.
“There’s a block on your schedule that says lunch. There’s no location, so I’m gonna assume we get to pick the place.”
My eyebrows shoot up. “Really?”
I have never been allowed to just pick a place to eat lunch. I almost always have a restaurant picked out for me, my guests pre-approved, and a reservation made.
“Yeah, why not? You have to eat, don’t you?”
“I sure do.”
He moves his hand as if to gesture “let’s go then” toward the door.
“You need to at least attempt to disguise yourself, though.”
I grab my hat and sunglasses and lead the way out. We manage to avoid anyone, particularly Ashley, who might try to stop us.
Our hotel is near a strip of restaurants, so we’re able to walk. We decide on a small Italian restaurant and get seated at a table toward the back. It’s the first time Luke and I are actually seated at a table together. Usually, he’s lurking nearby. It feels strange, but at least he doesn’t look as uncomfortable as he did when I made him sit with me at the coffee shop.
Since my back is to the restaurant, Luke allows me to take off my sunglasses, but I have to keep the hat on, which is fine by me.
His eyes are constantly moving, surveying everyone in the restaurant. Thankfully, it doesn’t seem to be a busy time for lunch.
“Do you ever stop?” I ask.
“Stop what?”
“Watching?”
He shakes his head. “Not when I’m around you.”
I look down at my menu. “Seems exhausting. Why did you want to be a bodyguard?”
“I didn’t,” he says plainly.
“Then why are you here?”
“When I was discharged from the military, I wasn’t sure what to do. Cody, my best friend and now boss, had a protection agency he’d been building for a few years. He convinced me to come and work for him.”
I keep my eyes focused on my menu, but I think this might be the most he’s ever talked to me about himself. I’m afraid if I look up, he’ll stop.
“Do you like it?”
“It’s not my dream job, no. But I’m good at it.”
I’ve read the description for the ravioli at least five times now, but I still refuse to look up. “What would your dream job be?”
He’s quiet for a minute as he thinks about my question. “I’ve never really thought about it. It’s probably changed over the years. At this point, I think I’d like to live somewhere away from people. Maybe have a farm or something like that. I think I’d just like quiet for a little while.”
I can’t imagine all the things he had to have seen and done in the military. And I don’t know much about who he was protecting before me, but I highly doubt it was another pop star. It was probably way more stressful. Although, by the ever-present scowl on his face, you’d think I was the most stressful case he’s had. But I can understand why he’d want to get away.
“That sounds nice.”
“Are you ready to order?” The server steps up next to our table, startling me. I jump slightly in my seat and hear Luke stifle a laugh. I kick him under the table, making him hiss in pain.
“Yes, I’ll have the ravioli,” I tell her since it was the only thing I looked at.
Luke orders his food, and then she asks, “Do you want garlic knots and salad?”
I look up at Luke for permission. I’m not usually allowed to order the extra bread at restaurants. Especially not if I also ordered pasta.
He tilts his head, staring at me. He’s going to make me decide.
“Yes, please.”
The server nods and walks off.
He clasps his hands and puts them on the table. “Alright, I answered your questions, so now you’ve got to answer mine. Why do you let everyone else control your life?”
I sigh and feel my shoulders slump. “I don’t know. I mean, at first, I was just listening to my parents, you know? I was so young when I got into the industry that I did whatever they told me. Then it just kind of stuck. People would tell me I had to do certain things in order for my fans to like me. That to maintain my career, I’d have to look like this and act like that. It became so overwhelming trying to remember who I was before all of this that I just let it happen. Now it feels like it’s too late to change anything.”
“It’s not too late, Calla. This is your life. You need to stand up for what you want.”
“I know. I guess I just don’t know what that is anymore.”
“Have you ever considered talking to a therapist?”
I nod, remembering how that conversation went with my parents. “I tried once. My parents didn’t want me to. They said I was overreacting. I try to watch YouTube therapy videos sometimes, but obviously, it’s not the same as actually talking to someone.”
“Calla.” He shakes his head. “You can’t keep going like this.”
“I know. I know.” He doesn’t understand how much I’m cornered. It’s not as easy as he’s making it sound.
Our server ends this particular conversation by setting down a bread basket and salad bowl in the middle of our table. I reach for a roll.
“First step of my new life: eating this roll. I don’t usually get to have bread at restaurants.”
He mutters, “Jesus,” under his breath but lets the subject drop.
“So, have you ever been to Colorado?” I ask.
“Nope. Have you?”
“Only for concerts. I think it’d be fun to go skiing during the winter, though.”
“You know how to ski?” he asks, sounding surprised.
“No. Are you kidding? My parents don’t let me leave my house without a bodyguard. You think they’d let me go skiing? Not a chance.”
He chuckles. “Yeah, didn’t think about that.”
The rest of our lunch goes by way too fast for my liking. Our food comes, but we keep chatting about how he has never actually owned a car since he grew up in New York City and how my favorite instrument to play is the piano. Dare I say I have fun with uptight Luke Pierson?
He even smiles a few times, leading me to believe he’s also having fun. I’m not ready for it to end when our server clears our plates and gives us the bill, which I quickly snatch out of Luke’s hand. There’s no way in hell I’m letting him pay for my lunch. He does try to argue by saying it was his idea to go out and that it’s a potential safety issue if my card information is shared with the media, but I counterargue by saying this is a work lunch provided by his employer, and I’m willing to take the risk. He lets it drop after that.
We take our time walking back to the hotel. I’m not ready to face Ashley yet. She’s already texted and called several times since Luke and I snuck out of the hotel. I know he let her know that he was with me and we’d be back in plenty of time, but that obviously didn’t appease her.
She is, of course, sitting in the lobby waiting for us when we walk through the doors. She lectures me on the elevator ride up about how I need to answer my phone because she knows I had it on me and was just ignoring her. I don’t bother responding because I know she won’t like the answer, so I just let her talk.
Once we’re back in the room, I excuse myself for a quick nap before we have to be at the venue. I don’t sleep well on a moving bus, so naps are important when we stay in a hotel. The bed in this room doesn’t disappoint either. I’m out as soon as my head hits the pillow.
When I wake up, I grab my phone and scroll through a few messages from my mom and one from Brayden. For the first time since I left L.A., I realize I haven’t heard from Thompson at all. It’s only been a few days, but I feel like it should be normal to want to talk to your partner every day when they’re gone, right?
He obviously doesn’t care enough to reach out to me, and I come to the realization that I don’t really want to talk to him either. Especially with how we left things.
It’s sad to realize that your first and only relationship is likely over. Part of me wants to hang on. Thompson is all I know. He’s the only man I’ve ever been with. I always thought I was going to marry him. We are Hollywood’s ‘It Couple,’ after all. But now? Now I’m not so sure.
A knock on my door pulls me from all my negative thoughts.
“Princess!” Luke’s voice calls. He calls me princess to piss me off, but I actually kind of love it. So, joke’s on him. “You up? We’ve got to go soon.”
“Coming!”
I roll out of bed and pull myself together before heading to the venue with Luke.