Chapter Twenty-one
June watched as Vaughn disappeared into the dark, rainy night. She blinked, as if she had rain in her eyes, and lowered her umbrella, unsure she’d seen what she thought she’d seen. Slowly, she turned and faced Natalie, who was sitting looking as shell-shocked as June felt. She knew then, that what she’d seen was real.
“I’m so sorry,” she said as Natalie caressed her own lips, as if they still stung.
Natalie swallowed and shook her head. “It’s okay.”
“No it’s not. I shouldn’t have barged in like that.”
“June. It’s fine.”
June leaned her umbrella against the wall next to the door and walked in to set the piece of paper on the coffee table. “I just wanted to go over this darn schedule and I guess I got carried away. I just really had no notion that Vaughn would be here.” She rubbed her forehead. “Lord, I’ve been so stupid. Here I’ve been trying to get the two of you together and you two were already well on your way.”
Natalie rubbed her hands on her denim-clad thighs. “No, June, not exactly.” She laughed a little, her nerves showing. “That was—impromptu.”
“You mean that was the first time you two…”
Natalie chewed her lip and nodded.
“Oh, lord. I really am sorry. I ruined it, didn’t I?”
“Don’t be so hard on yourself,” Natalie said.
June eased down next to her on the couch. “I’m afraid you don’t understand. Vaughn…she’ll be scared away now. She…well, for one she’s embarrassed. She’s a very private person. And for another, it’s very difficult for her to confess her feelings. Or to show them for that matter. Since Jeanie that is. So, I’m worried she won’t…come back to you.”
“Ever?” Natalie said, incredulous.
“I don’t know, child. I don’t know. She hasn’t, to my knowledge, been with anyone since Jeanie. So, your guess is as good as mine.”
Natalie stood and began to pace. June tried to comfort her. “But you seem to be different. She obviously has feelings for you. So maybe she’ll come around.”
“I’m not so sure. She…” She stared off in thought. “She seemed so confused, so, I don’t know, tentative and trepidatious. And yet…so passionate.” She touched her mouth again, as if remembering.
June blushed and got up and excused herself. “Well, I’ve intruded enough for one night. I reckon I ought to go find Vaughn and apologize again.” She grabbed her umbrella and opened the door. Natalie stood still, watching her in a dreamlike state.
“I’ll see you tomorrow.” She nodded toward the schedule. “I revised that. Have a look see when you see fit.”
Natalie absently nodded.
June bid her a good night and stepped out of the house and back into the cool rain. She propped open her umbrella and hurried toward the stables. Puddles were already pooling in the desert landscaping around the bungalow and even more were pooling in the hard, clay dirt on the way to the stables. Thunder growled again and lightning flashed, though both seemed more distant now. June slowed as she cowered beneath the shelter of the stables and closed her umbrella. She set it aside and walked down the row of horses to the next to the last stall where Miracle was kept. She found Vaughn in there, resting on a blanket next to the horse. She was stroking her, talking softly.
June felt bad for interrupting, but she needed to say her piece.
“You don’t have anything to apologize for, Gram,” Vaughn said, keeping her eyes on the horse, who lay next to her.
“Oh, but I do, child. I interrupted a very private, intimate moment. One of possible great significance and I’m so very sorry.”
“Like I said, it’s no big deal.”
“It is, Vaughn. And it pains me to hear you say it isn’t.”
Vaughn continued to pet Miracle, soothing her with her soft coos. “I’m sure Natalie understands.”
“She does. But do you?”
“Of course.”
“It won’t scare you away from her, will it?”
Vaughn didn’t answer. She just kept rubbing on Miracle.
“Vaughn?”
“Turn off the lights on your way out, will you?”
June stared at her. Vaughn didn’t say anything more and June’s heart sank. Vaughn was gone, the moment with Natalie, however significant and passionate, gone, carried away with the retreating storm. She’d feared as much. And she’d been right. Vaughn was just too fearful, too damaged to really admit to her feelings and allow herself to feel and experience them. And what was worse, was that June had no idea how to help her.
“She’s finally calmed,” Vaughn said, referring to the horse. “Since she first arrived home. Guess it just takes time.”
June closed her eyes, thinking of more than the horse. “I guess it does.” She left her and walked down the long row of horses to the entrance to the stables. Once there, she switched off the lights and retrieved her umbrella. But instead of opening it, she stepped outside into the falling rain and allowed the drops to penetrate her skin. She looked up into the sky and thought of Vaughn. Her strong-headed, strong-willed, strong-hearted granddaughter. Maybe she was just like a traumatized horse. Maybe it was going to just take a lot of time, love, and patience before she was her old self again.
But as June walked back toward the house, she wondered just how much time it would take and if Natalie would stick around long enough to find out?