Chapter 9 Aurelia
Aurelia
Constantine seemed to be a whole new man, happy and carefree the way he’d been when we first met.
He didn’t seem to care about the empire anymore, didn’t care about everything he’d left behind.
Now, he was present with me, making love to me before bed but fucking me viciously first thing in the morning.
Always had a smile on his face, always had a skip in his step.
I wished I could feel the same way, but I carried a secret heavier than the world. Now I knew I was at least a month along, and I continued to check pregnancy tests like they would somehow give me a different answer.
I needed to tell Constantine, but what if he wasn’t happy? What if I destroyed this good mood he was in, and he never got it back? What if he’d finally gotten himself to a good place and I destroyed it with this life-changing news?
I went to work at Rosticceria Da Cristina in the morning, prepped the arancini in the kitchen while the music played over the speakers.
My mind was elsewhere, barely on the task at hand, thinking about how and when I would tell him.
I probably needed to see an obstetrician soon, go to a checkup and make sure everything was okay.
The door opened, and Sofia walked inside with her leather satchel over her shoulder. She didn’t wear the uniforms we had on, the black T-shirts with the logo on the front. I’d never seen her in the kitchen, and it seemed like she only focused on running the business.
She beamed when she saw me at the counter. “Good morning, honey.” She came to me and gave me a one-armed hug because my gloved hands were covered in tomato sauce. “How are things going?”
“Good. Think I’m getting the hang of it.”
“Antonio said you’re doing great.” She took off her satchel and placed it on the steel counter in front of the credit card reader used during business hours. “And it’s nice to have another hand around here.”
Especially if it was a free hand. “I’m glad I’m not making your life more difficult.”
“More difficult?” she asked incredulously.
“You know, because it takes time and resources to train someone. Kinda slows everyone down.”
“You are not a burden, Aurelia. You’re family.”
A smile kicked onto my lips, but it was a painful one.
The more I spent time with Sofia, the more I realized how much Constantine was like her.
His attitude and his warmth and his work ethic—it all came from her.
He could be the kindest man I’d ever met, but he wasn’t a pushover either, or if you crossed him, there would be hell to pay.
Sofia had never shown that side to me, but she wouldn’t be able to run these businesses on her own if she weren’t tough.
She wouldn’t have raised Constantine into the man he was if she didn’t have a steel spine.
I wanted to be a part of this family so much, but I worried I’d put that in jeopardy with this pregnancy. Would his mother think the worst of me? That I’d planned it maliciously because her son was rich? That I was just after his money? That I was forcing him to settle down?
“Honey.” She seemed to see the pain flicker across my face, because her eyes were full of pity. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah,” I said a little too quickly. “That’s—that’s just nice of you to say.”
“I mean it, Aurelia. You’re a part of this family now.”
I didn’t know if it was just her words or the pregnancy hormones, but my eyes started to water out of my control. I sucked in a sudden breath to calm myself, feeling loved . . . but also feeling alone.
“Oh honey.” She came to me and gave me a big hug, not caring about the dirty gloves on my hands.
I couldn’t hug her back, so I just stood there, trying not to cry, trying to keep it together even though I’d already been emotionally wrecked.
She pulled away and helped me pull off the gloves and toss them in the trash. “Talk to me. Something’s bothering you.”
She reminded me so much of my mother sometimes.
When my mom would force me to cut through the bullshit and talk to her about my problems. Most of my memories of her were of her being sick, because she was ill for so long and it had been such a traumatic time.
Those sort of replaced all the good ones, but right now, Sofia made them come back.
“Honey.” She started to rub my arms, tried to bring me back to calm. “There’s nothing you can’t share with me.” Her kind eyes continued to bore into mine, desperate to take on the heartache I carried alone.
“Um . . .” There was something about her I inherently trusted, something that made me feel safe, made me feel at home. “I’m pregnant.” I said the words out loud, and suddenly, the burden felt so much lighter. When I got it off my chest, the weight on my shoulders decreased.
Her entire body went still as she paused to process that information.
The shock moved in and out of her eyes quickly .
. . and then there was joy. A smile came and widened to full capacity, and she squeezed my arms. “That is so wonderful, Aurelia. What a blessing.” She pulled me in for a hug and squeezed me tight, embraced me like she meant it, like there wasn’t a hint of disappointment.
She stepped back and looked at me again. “It’s okay to be scared. Your life has completely changed, even though nothing has actually changed yet. It’s normal.”
“He doesn’t know.”
She gave a nod in understanding. “I assumed.”
“I’m so scared to tell him.”
Her hands left my arms. “Why?”
Now I felt like I was speaking to my own mother instead of his. “I’m afraid he’ll think I did it on purpose. Like I did it to trap him or something. We’ve only been together for three months. It’s so soon, and he just went through so much in Rome . . .”
“It’ll be okay, Aurelia.”
“I don’t know what happened. I’ve never missed a pill. I’ve been on this stuff forever.”
“It happened because it was meant to happen.” When she smiled at me, her eyes watered. “It happened because you’re meant for each other. You’re meant to grow your love into a son or daughter. I know it’s scary right now, but trust me when I tell you this is the greatest blessing of your life.”
I nodded even though I didn’t fully agree. Wouldn’t be able to agree until Constantine knew the truth. Until we got through this.
“Don’t be afraid to tell him, Aurelia. I know my son, and I promise you he’ll be nothing but happy. He thinks the world of you, and he would never think the horrible things you’re afraid he will.”
I nodded, clinging to her words. “Please don’t tell him. I’m just not ready yet.”
“Your secret is safe with me, honey. The moment you tell him, he’ll feel the greatest joy he’s ever known. And I would never take that away from my son.”
When I got home, Constantine wasn’t there.
Which was a relief because I needed some time to take everything in. I’d had a beautiful moment with his mother and I would treasure that forever, but it was hard to appreciate it with all the stress.
I needed to tell him.
It was better for him to hear it from me than to figure it out another way, like when he noticed my stomach was more swollen than usual or when I didn’t have another period. “Fuck, I gotta do it.”
When I came inside, I greeted Medusa with a good rubdown.
She still used her walker, but she was so much better.
She didn’t need pain meds anymore, and when we’d had her checkup with the vet, he said her leg was healing nicely.
She could put some weight on her leg, but to make sure she didn’t halt her progress, we made her continue to use the walker.
I showered upstairs and reapplied my makeup before I returned to the main sitting room.
My heart was in shambles, the adrenaline making me so tense that all my joints ached. I wasn’t sure where he was, so I pulled up his location, which was something I hardly ever did. Felt like I was spying on him or invading his privacy.
He was at Daiquiri, the vibrant cocktail lounge he’d taken me to before.
He was probably there with some of his friends, catching up after work.
It was nice to be in a relationship where I didn’t have to wonder what he was doing or who he was with.
I could call or text him at any time, and he’d answer right away.
Wouldn’t leave me on read . . . like Enzo used to do.
I helped Medusa out of her walker, and she walked up the ramp Constantine had made for her so she could get on the couch easily. She curled up beside me and placed her chin on my thigh.
I petted her gently as I looked down at her. “You’re going to be the best big sister, Medusa.”
Constantine came home before dinnertime. Dressed in dark jeans and a gray T-shirt, he filled out his clothes with all that muscle. With the dark ink all over his skin, he looked even stronger. Any woman who looked at him fell under his spell, and any guy who looked at him was fucking terrified.
I watched him through the glass from the patio as he walked through the house. With a straight spine and an aura of confidence, he pulled out his phone and fired off a text before he moved to the bottom of the stairs and called up, like he was looking for me.
I raised my hand and waved at him to catch his attention.
He caught the movement in his peripheral and looked at me. Instantly, there was a smile, a man happy to come home to his family, his joy breaking through the glass and hitting my skin.
He opened the back door and walked across the terrace toward me.
Medusa got to him first, moving up to him in her walker, her tail wagging harder than it wagged for anyone.
Of course he stopped and kneeled down to give Medusa his attention, petting her cheeks and giving her a kiss on the head. “Hey, baby girl.” He rose to his full height, then finished the walk toward where I sat at the table.
I was happy to see him . . . but never more scared.
He leaned down and kissed me. “Hey, sweetheart.” He sucked my bottom lip into his mouth before he sat down across from me. “How was your day?”