Chapter 17 Constantine #2
“You’ll get a kink in your neck if you stay there.” She was dressed for bed, in one of my T-shirts with the makeup gone from her face, her long hair brushed out. “Come to bed.”
I remained seated, not because I was mad at her, but because I was mad at the world right now.
She watched me for a while before she approached the desk and sat in one of the armchairs that faced me, for guests who never came, business meetings that never took place.
It was all part of the stylistic choices of the interior designer I’d hired.
My T-shirt fit her like a dress, half of the neckline down her shoulder because it was far too big for her.
Her eyes were heavy with fatigue, but they were mostly filled with stress. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“I know you didn’t, sweetheart.”
“I just . . . want you to know you always have my support.” She chose her words carefully this time.
“You know how lost I was when we came here.”
Her eyes softened as she watched me.
“I turned my back on everyone, and I fucking know it. Wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to bounce back.
And then you told me something that put everything in perspective, and I got my life back.
Got my joy back. And now . . .” I shook my head.
“It’s gone again. I wish President Barsetti hadn’t come here.
I wish Rome weren’t falling to an asshole dictator. But there’s nothing I can do about it.”
Her eyes dropped down to her hands in her lap.
“It kills me, but I can’t risk the alternative.”
“Can I say something?” she asked quietly.
I drew in a slow breath and tempered my anger.
“Wouldn’t you be able to catch him by surprise?”
“If he’s smart, he’ll be keeping tabs on me.”
“Like, having men follow you?”
“Not necessarily. There are other ways to watch someone’s movements. Their phone records, financial transactions, utility usage, flight records.”
“But if you left right now and hopped on a flight or a ferry, he wouldn’t have much time. You could coordinate with Rocco—”
“Sweetheart, let it go.” I kept my tone even because I didn’t want to push her away, not when I already felt like a mountain stood between us at that very moment.
“Darius is petty and spiteful. Even if I hid you away somewhere, he’d spend the rest of his life searching for you.
Keep me alive until he found you and then do unspeakable things to you and force me to watch. Just let it go.”
A flash of fear moved across her eyes before she swallowed. “But if you were to defeat him, you would have both. You would have us and the Roman Republic again.”
“Even if that happened, I wouldn’t want it.”
“You wouldn’t?” she asked quietly.
I shook my head. “I’ve been fueled by revenge these seven years.
Wanted to defend the Republic, but what my heart truly desired was justice for my brother.
But I realize now . . . it’s time to move on.
I cleaned up his messes his entire life, and now that he’s dead, I’m still cleaning up after him.
He didn’t deserve to die for what he did, but he also knew it would get him killed and he did it anyway, so . . .”
She stared at me, hanging on every word. “What if you helped Rocco reclaim the Republic . . . and then walked off into the sunset?”
“You know why.”
“But if I say it’s okay—”
“You think your consent is what’s holding me back?” I asked incredulously, unsure how she could ask that after we’d discussed this for so long.
“I know in your heart this is what you want—and I want it too.”
“No.”
“Constantine—”
“Remember how he stormed into the palace and took you? That was nothing compared to what he’s capable of.”
“I know, Constantine. But . . . I’m brave.”
My entire body stiffened when I heard what she said.
“I’m brave, and I know I could do it.”
It meant the world to hear her say that, to hear how much she’d grown since the moment I’d stumbled across her broken pieces. To know that she found herself again after she found me.
But it changed nothing. “I know you are, sweetheart. If I hadn’t allowed Darius to outsmart me, we would have had a great life in Rome.
You would have been my empress, and we would have ruled this land.
But I’m the one who fucked it all up, and we have to live with those consequences.
I’m not going to change my mind . . . and I never want to discuss it again. ”
A couple days later, our lives began to feel normal again.
The episode with Gina was behind us, we didn’t speak of President Barsetti’s visit, and I started to forget the whole thing.
I fell back into my idyllic life in Taormina with my family and my woman.
Aurelia continued to work at the restaurant during the day, and I focused on starting our restaurant.
I met with the real estate agent to find the right spot.
I didn’t want to rent from someone else, wanted to own the property so no one could ever take it from me.
I knew I had to confront Isabella at some point, but I waited until my life felt stable before I dealt with that. If I came to her from a place of anger, I was afraid I would rip her into pieces.
I expected the conversation to be brief, so I went to her family-owned gelato shop and let myself into the back. I didn’t want to go to her apartment after the workday, because it felt stupid to leave my family and spend that time with my ex.
She was seated at the desk when I walked inside, and she gave a slight flinch when I appeared. “A heads-up would be nice.”
“So you can take off and avoid me?” I moved to the other chair by the desk, the same one I’d sat in when I found out her husband had been a cheating asshole.
She finished something on her laptop before she closed it, but she still wouldn’t look directly at me.
I knew she was embarrassed—as she should be.
“Look, I’m sorry for my viciousness. No excuse for it, and that’s on me. But you also need to make some changes if we’re going to coexist in this village.”
She sat back in her chair and crossed her arms over her chest.
I waited for an apology, but it didn’t seem imminent.
“This is the last olive branch I’m ever going to extend to you, Isabella.”
Her eyes finally flicked to mine.
“Then it’s no contact, pretend you don’t exist, you aren’t welcome in my mother’s house .
. . all that heavy stuff. I don’t want that, and I know you don’t either.
But I can’t keep entertaining this circus.
I’m going to be a husband and a father, and I can’t have this shit show running buck wild anymore.
” Thank god Aurelia was so understanding about it.
Otherwise, this could have destroyed my relationship and chased away the love of my life.
“So, can we forgive, forget, and move on?”
She looked away again, her arms noticeably tightening. She took a breath before she looked at me again. “I’m sorry for the way I acted, and I would love to move on. But I can’t see us ever being friends. It’s hard to imagine a time when I won’t love you anymore.”
“It’ll happen, Isabella. I promise you’ll meet someone, and I’ll fade so deep into obscurity that you’ll forget you ever loved me in the first place.
” It was the way I felt about Aurelia, my love for her so deep and raw that it was hard to remember a time when I wanted to spend my life with someone else.
“I hope you’re right.”
I was relieved I’d gotten an apology out of her, because if I hadn’t, it would have left a bad taste in my mouth. I needed to know that the woman I once loved wasn’t a narcissistic asshole and I was too blind to see it. “I know I am.”