32. Chapter Thirty-Two
Chapter Thirty-Two
M y eyes popped open and I instinctively flung my arm to the other side of bed.
“Ow!” Grey exclaimed.
A big grin rolled across my face as I flipped over. “Just checking to make sure you’re still here. You have a tendency to leave me lonely in the mornings.”
“Of course I’m still here,” he insisted. “I even stayed in bed despite wanting to go cook us some breakfast.”
“How long have you been awake?” I asked. “I thought I was an early bird. Why is it that you always wake up before me?”
“I haven’t been up that long. Just checking some emails, doing a few work things.” He signaled to his phone. “Speaking of work things, I need to make a quick trip back to New York next week…”
I contemplated saying something, but due to the uneasiness that filtered through my brain at the mention of his real life, I opted to keep my mouth shut.
“I was hoping you’d come with me?”
Impulsively popping up from the bed, I grabbed his shirt off the floor and tugged it on. “I have to go to the bathroom.”
A sigh of relief fell from my mouth as soon as I closed the door.
I glared at myself in the large oval mirror, whispering out loud, “MJ, what the fuck. Grey just asked you to go to New York with him, and instead of responding like a normal person, you acted like he asked you to help him murder someone. Get your shit together.”
Resting my hands on either side of the matte black sink, my head fell and I closed my eyes, letting my mind run in circles. New York was supposed to be our place, mine and Liv’s. It was supposed to be the start of our lives together, and then she died, and everything changed.
New York might’ve been my dream, but it was Grey’s reality. Meaning whether I went with him or not, he was eventually going back. For good. Nausea engulfed me. Where would he and I stand after this summer? What would this look like in September? I shuddered at the thought of picturing anything without him in it. I dragged my head up, doing my best to wrangle these emotions.
I couldn’t go to New York. I turned, taking a deep breath in hopes it would bring me the courage I needed to tell Grey I wasn’t going with him. But just then, something caught my eye.
The familiar purple flowers that permanently decorated my rib cage poked out from the unbuttoned shirt I’d thrown on. I reached for the dainty ink, my body jumping from the coldness of my fingertips.
“Liv…” Her name fell from my lips, almost inaudibly.
“You okay in there?” Grey’s voice filtered past the closed door.
Liv may be gone, but she was never far, and she sure as hell still knew how to push me out of my comfort zone. One thing I knew for sure was that girl was and always would be my driving force.
“Yeah, I’m good.”
It was moments like this that made me believe Liv was 1000 percent here with me in one way or another.
I opened the door and saw Grey still in bed.
“Yes, I’d love to come with you.”
Astonishment flooded his face as he rubbed his chest. “Really?”
“Yes, really,” I said, leaning my weight on the thick white door frame.
Now that the initial shock had worn off, little pangs of excitement sprouted inside me.
Grey pulled himself from the bed, revealing that he’d only been wearing navy boxer briefs, a detail I’d forgotten from last night. That man was an image I wanted burned in my brain for the rest of eternity. His chocolate brown hair effortlessly flowed in all directions but somehow still looked good. His built body stood strong as he adjusted himself and swayed toward the bathroom, only stopping to plant a kiss on my forehead before stepping inside and closing the door behind him.
I made my way to a quaint light-washed wooden desk tucked perfectly into the corner of his room. Sprawled opened in the center of it lay a sleek back journal.
I knew I shouldn’t, but Grey had seen my art, and now I wanted to see his. I began thumbing through it and was taken aback when I saw the pages were filled with the most beautiful sketches. Buildings, bedrooms, restaurants, and everything in between. His dream of being an architect wasn’t far-fetched at all; his drawings were spectacular. The lines were precise, the angles perfect, and the aesthetic absolutely stunning.
“Didn’t your mom tell you not to put your hands on things that aren’t yours?”
Startled and a little embarrassed, I turned. “Jesus, Grey, you scared the shit out of me.”
“That’s because you were doing something you weren’t supposed to be doing,” he said playfully, wrapping his arms around my waist.
“Grey, these are really good. Like really good. I don’t understand how you didn’t pursue architecture as a career.”
The word architecture almost got stuck in my throat as Liv’s voice echoed in my head. One day I’m going to design the most beautiful skyscraper in New York City. It will stand out among the rest, with glass on the outside and dark rich wood on the inside. People will come from all over the world just to see it .
She’d always dreamed of being an architect—something about the science behind the lines and the shapes, how intricate some buildings were and how the simplest designs could be the hardest to figure out.
“I wasn’t kidding when I said my father basically scolded me anytime I mentioned I was interested in something besides politics.” He sounded defeated as his hands slowly closed the journal, almost symbolically.
“From what I know about you, I can’t imagine you’re someone who lets people tell you what to do.”
“I’m not,” he confirmed. “Unless it’s you.”
“I’ll keep that in my back pocket for another day.” I winked, moving to collect my dress from the floor. “I have a lunch shift at The Wharf that I need to get ready for.”
“What? I thought you had the next couple of days off?”
“I did, but then Sam texted me and asked if I would cover her today.”
“Ugh, why are you such a good friend?” He threw himself backward onto the bed. “I wanted to spend the next four days with you, in bed, not leaving this house.”
I slinked into my dress and fluffed my hair a bit, weighing my need for a shower versus just a little refresh before my shift.
“As tempting as that is—and trust me, after your performance last night, that is very tempting—I can’t let Sam down. She always covers for me and …” I emphasized my last word. “Because I took her shift today, I’m sure she’d be happy to cover any of my shifts while we’re in New York.”
He sat up, a cheeky expression spread across his handsome face. “I’m planning on leaving Monday night and coming back Wednesday night. Think that’ll work?”
I smiled. “I think we can make that work.”
“Good.” His voice was low as he made his way to me. We stared at one another in the mirror as he took the spot right behind me. “Because I wasn’t going to take no for an answer.” His hand grasped my chin, gently pulling me to him before claiming my mouth with his.
“Grey…” I giggled. “I have to go or I’m going to be late.”
Stealing one more kiss, he murmured, “Fine. But at least let me give you a ride.”
“Deal.”
The thick black letters of the damn Whalecum door mat glared at me as I pushed the door open.
“Hey, Dad! Happy Friday.”
“Well, hello there, MJ,” he responded. “Looks like someone had a good time last night.”
My cheery tone had even caught me off guard.
Feeling my cheeks run red, I scooted behind the counter and busied myself prepping the bar. “Speaking of last night…” I peered over my shoulder to see Dad inching closer to the bar until his elbows were resting on it and his palms were pressed into his face.
“Uh huh, I’m listening.”
I was so giddy, I couldn’t wait a second longer. “Grey asked me to go to New York with him for a couple of days. I told him yes, but if you don’t think I should, or if you don’t want me to change the schedule this late, I really don’t have to go. I—”
“MJ,” he cut in.
I took a breath. “Yeah?”
“Go.”
My hands stopped what they were doing. “Really?”
“What do you mean, really?” he responded, walking behind the bar. “You should absolutely go. Do you see yourself right now? You’re beaming. I haven’t seen you this excited…” He paused. “I haven’t seen you this excited in a long time,” he said, wrapping his arms around me. “I love you big, Miller Jean,” he whispered as his grip tightened.
“I love you bigger.”
He didn’t have to say anything else; we both knew this was a big step. Something was happening that was a long time coming yet also looked a lot different than I would’ve ever thought.
Although, didn’t it always look different than we imagined?