Chapter 25
It took a while before I was able to remember how to walk again. Yet it was barely enough for me to get my legs to work enough to guide me back to the bench. Afterward, I literally sat in a daze until once again, another pair of footsteps and laughter walked past.
It was time to return. I needed to get back to work. And so, the second my heart somewhat settled down, I rose to my feet and returned to the restaurant.
He had given me until the following night; however, the moment I walked in, my eyes searched for him. He was across the room, a tumbler of golden liquor in hand, surrounded by a group of people he conversed with.
I watched him, quite embarrassingly mesmerized, and it was as though he felt it because a few seconds later, he turned his head and met my gaze.
It lingered. He stared for a total count of three very long seconds, and my heart nearly thundered out of my chest.
Sighing, I walked myself back to the table where I had left my camera and plopped down onto my seat.
This was trouble. I was in trouble, but my question to myself was if it was something I could tolerate and manage for the next few days.
This would be over by the weekend, I told myself, and just then, Aurora came to mind.
I looked around the hall and realized that I couldn”t see her. So, I rose back to my feet and took my phone along with me.
I called her, and at first, she didn’t pick up, but eventually, she did.
“Hello,” she answered, and I was incredibly glad to hear from her. I also couldn’t help but feel a tad bit guilty.
“Where are you?” I asked. “It seems more people have arrived. The restaurant is fuller than when it started.”
“I know,” she said and then she went quiet.
“Aurora?” called.
“I”m in the car, with my fiancé,” she replied. “I told him I wasn’t feeling well, so he came out here with me.”
“Oh,” I said and felt even more racked with guilt. I was here to work, to capture her moments, yet I had literally been frolicking in the gardens with her brother that she wasn’t currently on the best of terms with.
Sighing, I lowered my voice and my tone.
“Are you going to go home to rest?” I asked. “Maybe you should.”
“I can’t,” she said sounding even sadder. “He wants to stay. He has to stay but... he feels so uncomfortable. He wouldn’t tell me, though, but I”m sensitive towards things like this.”
I nodded.
“I completely understand”
.
“I’ll be back in soon,” she said, however, I wanted to go to her.
“Please tell me where you are?” I asked. “Do you want me to come to you? I’d love to.”
She went quiet again as she contemplated this request and, to my disappointment, she refused.
“I’ll head back now. I’ll meet you at the entrance.”
“Alright,” I said, put the phone away and waited.
She soon returned, and I watched her walk side by side with her fiancé as they returned. He sent me a huge smile as we met at the door, and then she urged him to head in alone so that she could talk to me.
I watched her and instantly leaned forward to give her a hug, and when I pulled away, she was incredibly surprised and somewhat amused.
“What”s that for?” she asked, and I smiled, however, her face seemed to freeze in dark suspicion.
“You were not thinking of quitting right? Why does this feel like a goodbye?”
“I”m not quitting,” I told her, “and it’s not goodbye. We both needed it, I think.”
“You’re right,” she beamed, her eyes sparkling.
We started to head in then, but she stopped me.
“Wait, why did you need a hug? Is anything wrong? Is Victoria bothering you again?”
I smiled, wondering how someone could be so sweet.
”No,” I replied, “At least it”s something I can handle. Everything is fine. I’m having a blast.”
“I know that”s not true,” she smiled. “My fiancé said the same thing. But it’ll be over soon, so please bear it a little while longer.”
I nodded, and we looked out across the crowd.
I saw her watch them, and immediately, I pulled out my camera to take a photo. She turned to me then, and a gorgeous smile spread across her face.
“Drake really wasn’t kidding when he said that even though it”s my wedding, it has very little to do with me. I guess I shouldn’t be complaining because I don’t really care for the attention, but it”s just … it”s taking away the magic and excitement I’d expect to feel when I was getting married. My fiancé hates the crowd as well. We’re very similar in this regard.”
She looked at me.
“Am I whining again?”
“No,” I replied. “I completely understand what you’re saying.”
She nodded then and smiled at me.
“Thank you for being here. My furry son only gets in Friday, so till then, I’m going to lean completely on you. Please don’t refuse.”
This made me laugh.
“I won’t. I’ll lean completely on you as well.”
Her fiancé came over then with a flute of sparkling grape juice for her, and after sending a nod in greeting to me, they once again disappeared into the crowd.
Once again, I was left alone with my thoughts, and they were brutal. Everyone truly was making this about themselves, including me now. Instead of doing my job and keeping my focus on the couple, I was allowing myself to get unnecessarily distracted with other trivial matters, and it wasn’t right.
It made me upset, and so in that moment, I made my decision. I didn’t want to run into Drake again, and so I stayed out of sight, and thankfully, I didn”t see him afterward as he became immensely busy.
Later that night when I had showered and was in bed, I pulled up his number and sent him my response.
“I’ve considered your offer, and I know you gave me till tomorrow night to decline, but I’ll be doing that now. I think it’s best for me, at this time, to solely focus on my job.”
I sent this without any remorse and completely full of conviction, however afterwards, and as I
shut my eyes to sleep for the night, it felt as though I had downed anxiety in a bottle. All my emotions came out - dread, unhappiness, doubt, and to add salt to the wound, I had never been so horny. I couldn’t stop thinking about him, all of which was now heightened and worsened by the fact that I had completely nipped whatever this was between us in the bud.
Despite all this inner torment, I didn”t change my mind, and so in no time and eventually, I was fast asleep.