15. Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Fifteen
Violet
I was fuming as I stood to the side of the training grounds, and watched Chris getting pawed at by the same girls again. Initially, when they came in, Chris ignored them. But I guess the girls decided they weren’t going to be ignored tonight. Maybe it was something to do with the full moon yesterday, or maybe it was just because he’d humored them the other night, but they weren’t letting up with their request.
Finally, Chris asked me to wait for him on the bench while he helped them. He made it a point to ask me not to leave the training grounds, telling me he was still annoyed about when I ran off the other day.
That was twenty minutes ago, and I’d been watching him teaching each girl the right form for a stupid move that they were using to slither up and down his body. To his credit, Chris was looking really annoyed, and only touched them when absolutely necessary. Not that it helped my jealousy or my annoyance.
“I thought you were the one getting trained?”
I eeped then giggled when Elim jumped over the bench and sat a little further down than necessary.
“I told you, he appears to be taking up new pupils,” I answered.
“He doesn’t look very happy about it.”
We both turned to look at him in time to watch him huff as he tried to explain something again.
“Nope, but he also doesn’t seem to know how to tell them no.”
“What is it that he’s teaching you?” Elim asked.
“Getting my stamina up and some self-defense.”
“What are you guys working on right now?”
“Well, right now, nothing. He’s clearly occupied.” I laughed wryly. “But, we were going to start on free weights.”
“I can help you with that. Unless you want to keep waiting on him?”
I turned to look at Chris. Did I want to train with Elim? Not really. But it was my idea for him to join us, and the women didn’t look like they had any intention of releasing Chris anytime soon.
“Sure,” I answered, and hopped off the bench.
“What are you repping at right now?”
“Umm, fifty pounds on the machines,” I answered, feeling the heat coming to my face. Fifty pounds was pretty weak for a wolf.
“Alright, we’ll start with some goblet squats. You know what those are?”
I shook my head, trying not to giggle at the name. Elim removed his hoodie, leaving him in only a light white tee before grabbing a fifty-pound dumbbell for me and a two-hundred-pound dumbbell for himself.
I almost dropped my jaw. For a minute I’d forgotten that he was a vampire. He didn’t look like he should be able to lift much, but neither did Aunt Kassie. Vampires were deceptive. They were made to look beautiful and delicate, but were lethal creatures.
Elim showed me what the rep for the exercise looked like, and then I was trying to replicate him while trying to resist taking peeks at Chris.
“You need to tuck your core in a bit more,” Elim instructed. “Go down a little bit lower.” Elim dropped his dumbbell and approached. He stopped a few steps away, scratching his head. “Can I come closer to show you?” he asked.
I nodded, and Elim approached slowly and with careful movements. He put one hand on my torso and one on my shoulder. With the gentlest touch possible, he guided me to the right squatting position. He remained hovering after he let go to check my form, then returned back to his spot. We chatted as he guided me through a couple of sets. After we were done with those, Elim was showing me the proper way to do a deadlift, when Chris finally made his way back to us.
“What are you doing?”
Chris was glaring at Elim, whose hand was on my lower back.
“Oh, you’re done with your friends? Elim here is helping me train,” I answered.
“That’s my job,” Chris reminded me with, his eyes still on Elim beside me.
Elim let go of my lower back and moved to the side.
“You were busy with your second job.”
“Vio—”
“It’s fine, Chris. Really. Elim’s a great teacher. We’re almost done, right, Elim?” I turned to smile at Elim so I couldn’t glare back at Chris.
“Right. I have to go keep looking for the beast. I just wanted to catch you, and see if you wanted to schedule that spar.”
“Any time, any place,” Chris answered through gritted teeth.
“Hey, man. If you don’t want to, that’s fine. I’m getting trained by my aunt when this job is done, and I wanted to see how behind I was, but if—” Elim stopped when Chris sighed and shook his head, seeming to know he was directing his anger at the wrong person.
“No. It’s fine. How about on Friday?”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. Since you’re almost done, I’ll wait by the door for you, Violet.”
“Elim can take me back if—”
“I’ll be by the door.”
His tone brooked no argument, so I shut up and nodded, but not without glaring at his retreating back.
“Are you guys a couple?” Elim asked.
“He’s my guard.”
“So, if I asked you out on a date, he wouldn’t try to beat me up?” he asked, flashing me a smile.
My face heated, but I smiled back.
“He wouldn’t because I wouldn’t say yes. I can’t go out in public yet.”
“What about somewhere within the pack grounds? I have a little movie projector I always bring with me.” Elim suggested.
“You carry around a movie projector?”
“It’s small, you’ll see. It helps break the ice. Not a lot of supernaturals are comfortable around vampires because of the blood thing.”
“That must be tough.”
“Sometimes. That’s why I carry the projector, though.”
We finished the set of reps and set the equipment back where it belonged.
“Thanks for keeping me company,” I told him, genuinely grateful. I would’ve just spent the night inside my head otherwise.
“You didn’t answer my question, though,” Elim reminded me.
“I don’t know. I’m not in a place where I’m comfortable being in a room alone with you, Elim,” I told him honestly.
“Fair. I’ll take the progress, though. You let me near you today.” He flashed me another smile.
“Definite progress,” I smiled up at him as we reached my brooding, glaring guard. For someone with an amazing poker face, he sure wasn’t hiding it right now. “Have a good night, Elim.”
“Have a good night, Violet.” Elim made that dramatic little bow he gave me the first time I met him, and flashed me a smile.
Chris grunted and opened the door, exiting first and keeping the door open for me to follow him. We walked back to the pack house in tense silence. Once again, Chris was walking a little too fast for me, but this time, I didn’t try to keep up with him. I let him keep going until he realized he was fifty feet ahead of me. He frowned when he saw me walking way behind him, and came back to me.
“Sorry,” he grumbled.
It was my turn to grunt. Maybe it was catching. We made it to my room and stared at each other in silence.
“You like Elim,” Chris said. He didn’t ask, he stated. “You trust him. You let him near you.”
“I’m beginning to trust him. He’s been nothing but kind and respectful of my boundaries,” I replied.
“You’ve been spending a lot of the evenings talking to him since he arrived. You like him.”
“He’s a nice person, and he doesn’t know anyone here.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“Then what did you mean?” I challenged.
I was annoyed right now. If he liked me, why couldn’t he just say it? Why were we dancing around the real question? He left me with a thousand questions last night, then this morning when he woke me up, it was like it never happened. Then, I had to watch him getting mauled by five different women, and he’s the one angry that Elim is helping me?
“You were training with him.”
“I didn’t wake up at four in the morning to watch you getting pawed by other women,” I blurted and then felt my face heat at having blurted it out.
Chris sighed and looked away.
“I don’t know how to get rid of them. I ignore them, and they keep coming. I keep asking you if you mind, and you say you don’t, so I don’t have a valid reason to refuse.”
“How about you just tell them no?” I asked, crossing my arms.
“I ca—What if it reflects badly on Crescent Moon? They don’t have adequate training. Shouldn’t someone be helping them? I have a du—”
I snorted. Those girls didn’t need training. They needed a mate or at least to get laid.
“Weren’t you the one who said ‘Not my monkey, not my circus, we’re just here to provide a few bananas?’” I shook my head. “Like I said, I’m not waking up at an ungodly hour to watch you training someone else. I can just ask Elim to keep helping me if you’re unable to say no. That way you can have a break from me, too.”
Chris’ eyes blazed with anger at my words, and his jaw ticked. I waited for him to reply, but instead, he just moved towards the bathroom.
“I’ll let you shower,” he said and slammed the door to his room behind him just hard enough to let me know he was angry.
I sighed. Two broken people trying to figure out their feelings was certainly a messy event.
Chris and I were prickly with each other all morning. Both unable to talk about what was really bothering us about the whole thing. Both too vulnerable and broken to open ourselves up for heartbreak. I wanted to tell him. I wanted to say that I was jealous, and that’s why I kept getting annoyed that the other women were openly flirting with him in front of me. But then, what? He could let me down easy, or he could tell me he liked me. And what if he liked me? What kind of girlfriend could I be? I’d never even kissed a guy. I wasn’t even sure I could do it without flashing back to my time with Nickolas.
Because that was one thing I never told anyone. The one thing I would take to my grave. It was Uncle Theo’s brother the one that ‘sampled me’ first. It was his face and his hands I felt every time I had a nightmare. But, from what I’d overheard Mom and Dad talking, Uncle Theo was struggling with knowing the things Bastet, the goddess Xochiquetzal, had suffered under his hands. He wasn’t the only one. Uncle Helios was also blaming himself.
I couldn’t do that to them, and while Dr. Campbell told me it wasn’t healthy to keep that knowledge to myself because it was a reminder of what I was keeping secret every time I saw them, I knew it would harm more people than it would help me.
My uncles were good, decent men. They were already torn apart knowing what happened to me. Giving them his name or telling them the things the man said to me, would only destroy them.
After work, Chris escorted me back up to my room. He was going to get us dinner, but I stopped him.
“I’m not hungry. Why don’t you go downstairs and have dinner with everyone, and I’ll nap.”
“I... okay.” Chris barely expelled the word before he turned and walked away, sending a pang of hurt through my heart. I locked the door to my room. I went and cleaned the cage of the rabbit I’d decided to call Coco. She was slightly friendlier today, not quite trying to exit the cage the moment I opened it as if I was trying to kill her. I put in new food and treats into the forager, but I noticed she wasn’t eating very much.
It probably misses outside, Nenetl mentioned.
I’ll let it go once it’s fully healed, and they catch the thing that tried to eat her.
I spent a few minutes petting the rabbit, letting it get used to my scent, then I returned her to her cage, crawled under the covers and tried to sleep.
“ I t’s just a dream. You’re safe. You’re here. I’m here. It’s just a dream.” Chris’ soothing voice brought me out of my nightmare.
I opened my eyes to find myself staring at his broad chest. He was holding me in his arms, my hands were fisted, trapped at my sides by his embrace and I could feel the tears streaming down my face. I took a shuddering breath, and looked up at Chris. I had to look away when I noticed a single tear leaving his eye.
I felt his arms loosen around me, then begin to withdraw. I gripped the piece of his shirt I could reach and whispered, “Don’t.”
His arms came around me again, and I let out a deep sigh. I leaned into his chest, and knowing I’d be embarrassed by my childish behavior later, I allowed myself to relax and fall back asleep, surrounded by his scent and steady beat of his heart.
I woke up in the same position, and after a moment, I dared to peek up at Chris. He was sleeping; his breathing deep and slow. His lips were slightly parted, and his face was relaxed.
This poor man got fucked royally being stuck with me, and now I was developing feelings.
I think he has feelings for you, too, Nenetl replied, having followed my thoughts.
I don’t know, Nenetl. Aren’t werewolves supposed to be dominant, passion-filled and possessive over the women they like?
When has Chris ever done anything like that? He’s more disciplined than the military. Plus, even if he did the official rejection, he’s the one who was made to feel like he wasn’t enough. To make matters worse, Traci chose our brother over him. He and his parents are loyal to our family. Even if it isn’t the truth, he already believed he wasn’t enough before Traci. Think about what it did to him after. Without a mate bond to let him know the Moon Goddess believes he deserves us, he’s operating off his own self-esteem and sense of self-worth. Just like we’re currently doubting ours.
Well, heck. She had a point on that.
So, what do I do?
I know you hate this, but if you really want something to happen with Chris, you might have to tell him you’re interested.
I groaned internally, resting my forehead on the firm chest in front of me, and enjoying the warmth it provided. That was not me. I was an introvert. I rarely talked to people as it was. The few times I got asked out, I pretty much squeaked a “sorry, can’t” and ran away.
I didn’t do vulnerable. I hid and ran when I had to.
Consider it part of the new you. People are going to be tip-toeing around what triggers you for a while. You have to learn to let them know what you want or need. Especially if it was a trigger before. Like hugs, holding hands... kissing.
I tried to sneak a peek up at Chris’ lips to imagine what it would feel like to be kissed, and found him awake and looking down at me. My face instantly heated.
“Are you okay?” His sleepy voice sent a shiver down my body. “Are you cold? I didn’t want to move you.”
Chris withdrew his arms and sat up, and that was when I actually felt cold. I sighed and shook my head.
“Just embarrassed.”
“You can’t control your dreams, Violet.”
I grabbed the phone instead of answering that it wasn’t why I was embarrassed. It was three thirty in the morning. “Want to go train early? I slept a lot.”
“Are you sure?”
“The only way for me to stop feeling weak, is to stop being weak, right?” I asked, feeling Nenetl’s pride at my words.
She was getting stronger, too. She was awake for longer periods, she was talking more. We could get through this.
“Right. I’ll go get ready.”
I got ready and waited for Chris’ knock on the bathroom door. A few minutes later, we were headed down the stairs when I stopped.
“What’s wrong?”
“I forgot my phone.”
“I’ll grab it,” Chris said and left me standing on the third-floor landing.
I was looking up at the wall along the stairs, thinking a mural would probably look really good there, when the hairs in the back of my neck suddenly stood on end. I had no chance to do anything as I felt a pair of hands pushing me from behind.
I toppled down the stairs, my body hitting everything on the way down. I tried to grab onto something, but I felt a pain on my wrist and pulled my hand back. I was barely conscious by the time I landed, and I dimly heard my name being called before everything went black.
I woke up, but didn’t dare move. Everything was hurting too much to even whimper about it. I kept my eyes shut as I heard people arguing nearby.
“Why isn’t she healing? It’s been two hours. Should I call Mom to send Aunt Nat?”
That was definitely my sister’s voice.
“She’s healing. It’s just slower. Her wolf is weak right now. She can’t shift,” Chris explained.
“What? Since when?” Bells demanded.
“Since the massacre where her mate died.”
“Her m-Violet had a mate?”
That was Cade. Poop, like I needed more pity glances.
“It’s not common knowledge. Violet asked us not to tell people. She met her mate the night of the Blue Moon massacre. He died a few minutes later,” Bells answered.
“Fucking Christ, how is she still fighting after everything that’s happened?”
That’s why I didn’t want anyone to know. Cade’s response was mild compared to what others would say.
“Because she’s a warrior,” Chris replied to Cade’s rhetorical question, and I so badly wished I believed that.
“What are we going to do about Ada?” Bells asked.
“I’ve put her in the basement in chains. I can’t believe you don’t have a dungeon!” Cade answered.
“We’ve never had issues before.”
“The council is coming soon, right?”
“In two months.”
“Should I take her to Crescent Moon and have her held there until they come, then?” Cade’s voice sounded frustrated.
“Why the fuck did even she come after my sister? Violet is the sweetest fucking person, and she doesn’t even talk to anyone but us here.”
If it was Ada, that was exactly why she came after me, I wanted to say.
“I don’t know. I’m waiting for Violet to wake up to see if there’s anything she can tell me,” Cade answered.
“She approached Violet that day at the picnic first. Maybe that has something to do with it,” Chris sounded so angry right now.
I remembered he asked me if I wanted him to interfere, but I told him to stay put. I was trying to be strong.
“But what does Ada have to talk to her about? Violet doesn’t talk to anyone, right?” Cade asked.
“No. Just us here. Are you sure it was on purpose, Elim?” my sister asked.
I wanted to snort. It was definitely on purpose.
“Yes. I was coming into the pack house and Violet was looking up at nothing.”
Not nothing! I was looking at possibilities!
“I watched Ada come and push her off the third-floor landing. No words, nothing. She pushed her and ran.”
“I’m going to kill her. No one touches my sister,” my big sister growled, making me love her that much more.
I finally opened my eyes and groaned, shutting them back again. The light hurt, and it only made the rest of me hurt.
“Violet? Vi?”
I felt the bed dip by my hip, jolting my foot and making me hiss in pain.
“Can you lower the lights?” I asked.
“There’s no dimmer, sweetie, but you can keep your eyes closed. How do you feel?” Bells asked.
“Like I got run over by a truck.”
“Do you remember what happened?” she continued.
“Someone pushed me down the stairs. I was waiting for Chris, then I felt hands on my back and I fell.”
“Do you know why Ada would do that?”
I tried to nod, but groaned when it hurt.
“She accused me of trying to take away her alpha’s attention at the park. Every time she sees me lately she throws me the stink eye.”
“Wh—Ho—Fuck. I’m going to kill her.”
The room suddenly filled with Cade’s angry alpha aura, surprising me, and not in a good way.
“Cade, I know I’m of alpha blood, but Nenetl is really weak right now and I’m in pain. I’m going to break my neck here trying to submit if you don’t control your alpha aura.” I struggled to keep my head up as I spoke with him.
“Shit, I’m sorry.”
Cade’s aura instantly disappeared and I breathed a sigh of relief. From my side, I heard Chris do the same, and I even thought I heard Elim breathe a little easier from somewhere on my right.
“Fuck. I’m sorry guys,” Cade apologized to everyone again.
“How did you do that?” Bells suddenly asked.
“Do what?”
“Your aura. That was the first time I’ve felt it, and now it’s gone. Like completely gone. It’s like that with John and all of your pack members. I don’t feel any kind of aura from you guys.”
“We’re cattle ranchers, Bells,” Cade answered as if that explained it.
“What does that have to do with anything?”
“We work with prey and horses. They get cagey when they sense our aura, so we’re taught to suppress it from the moment we get our wolves. Everyone in the pack does it.”
“Oh,” Bells said.
“Well, it explains why I couldn’t sense Ada coming,” I mumbled.
“I’m so sorry, Violet. Ada’s been... persistent, but never did anything like this before.”
“Not your fault, Cade. Like I said, there’s one in every pack.”
I opened my eyes slowly, squinting as I let my eyes get used to the light. Bells was sitting on the side of the bed, Chris was standing next to the headboard, Cade was pacing, and Elim was standing by the window.
I tried to pull myself into a sitting position, but hissed when my foot moved an inch.
“Don’t move! You broke your ankle and your wrist,” Chris barked, helping me sit up while Bells put the pillow back under the foot.
“I can take you to the ER to get a cast. I just wanted to make sure you were okay before I moved you,” Bells said, rubbing my leg a little as I breathed through the pain.
I could feel exhaustion coming from Nenetl as she slept in the back of my mind. I moved one wrist, and then the other. They didn’t hurt, and neither one was broken.
“I don’t need it. Nenetl is healing me, but she’s sleeping right now. She’s exhausted. She’s probably just taking a break.”
“She’s not as strong as she used to be, yet. It’ll help if we get the leg in a cast. It should help her heal if you’re not injuring it with every movement.” Chris argued.
“Okay. Whatever you think is best,” I answered him, not wanting to argue. Any kind of relief would be appreciated right now.
“I’ll go with you,” Elim said, pushing off the window, but I shook my head.
“We’re bound to be stuck there past daybreak, and you’ll be in trouble.”
“I’ll take her. I just need a car,” Chris stated.
“Take my truck,” Cade mentioned before his face turned dark. “I’m going to go have a few words with my pack member.”
“I’ll see them off and then join you, Cade. I want to have words with your pack member, too,” my sister growled.
“You should go with Violet,” Cade suggested.
“No, I’ll be fine. Chris’ll protect me,” I argued. I didn’t need people hovering around me. Bells was a busy woman.
“There’s bound to be a crowd, Violet,” Cade pointed out “It’s almost six already.”
“I know, but I have to deal with it some way, right? At least, I’m too focused on the pain to freak out. Besides, I trust Chris. I know he’ll protect me.”
“Text me if you get bored,” Elim said, looking conflicted.
I nodded, wincing at the pain. I moved to slide off the bed when Chris bent down and put one hand around my waist and another under my legs. He picked me up, and I grunted in pain as the foot jarred.
“Sorry,” Chris whispered, looking as if he was the one in pain.
I couldn’t nod, and I couldn’t speak from where my teeth were grinding on each other trying to deal with the pain, so I opted to follow his example and grunted in agreement. I wrapped my arms around his neck and leaned on his chest while Bells grabbed my purse. We walked out, stopping at Cade’s room so he could hand over the keys, and off we went.
When we got to the hospital, Chris put me in a wheelchair and kept me in a corner of the ER room as we waited to be seen. I was anxious at the start, especially whenever someone walked near us, but eventually, the pain and the adrenaline of dealing with my anxiety proved too much, and I began falling asleep in the chair. I kept jarring awake, panicking over noises, until Chris put his arm protectively across the armrests of the chair to soothe my anxiety. I wrapped my arms around his one, and rested my head on his bicep, allowing myself to drift off.
It was almost evening by the time we got back to the pack grounds the next day. Chris suggested we go to another hospital, but I just wanted it to be over. I was exhausted, hungry, and irritable. Nenetl was still sleeping, and the pain medications they gave me for a human my size were doing nothing at all, since I was a werewolf with a metabolism that burned through it too quickly.
Chris parked and went around to lift me up, despite having been given crutches. I grunted, but I knew I wouldn’t win this one. There were too many stairs to get to the alpha floor.
Cade and Bells met us in my room, where I sighed with relief to be finally back in my own bed.
“How are you feeling, Vi?”
“Hangry,” I answered honestly, making Bells chuckle.
“I’ll bring you both dinner.”
Bells left, and we were left with Cade in the room, who was looking very guilty.
“You talk to Ada?” I asked.
“Yes. It seems she figured since I was spending all my time with you, I was interested and she was jealous.”
I snorted.
“Chris was there every time. She saw what she wanted. This isn’t on you, Cade. You were being a good friend.” I assured him then with a wink, I added, “Besides, we both know which Salonen sister you’re really interested in.”
Cade chuckled and a small blush covered his face.
“Am I really that obvious?” I only smiled in response, making Cade chuckle again. Once the moment was gone, he got a bit more serious. “I’m taking Ada with me to Crescent Moon. The council will retrieve her from there, but your parents wanted to speak with her first.”
It was my turn to chuckle. Good luck with that. If Kara and Mom didn’t finish her, Atlas and Dad would.
“When are you off?”
“It was going to be two days from now, but considering everything, I’m leaving tomorrow.”
“Sorry.” I gave him a strained smile.
“Here.” Bells came in with a tray full of food. “Make sure you call Mom and Cory, Vi. They didn’t want to call you in the ER, but they were worried.”
“I will.”
“Alright, we’re going to let you guys rest. Cade has to pack, and I have to get back to work,” Bells said, pushing Cade out of the room.
Cade turned back and winked at me, making me chuckle.
“Don’t leave without saying goodbye!” I called after him.
“Wouldn’t dream of it.”
Chris and I ate the food Bells brought, and when we were done, I rested my head against the headboard. I was drained and all I wanted was to stay here in silence. A sudden noise had me opening my eyes, and I saw him blushing and sitting up straight. I closed my eyes before he could see me looking at him, and then opened one when I thought enough time had passed. He was sitting in the chair and nodding off. Taking in a sharp breath every time he startled awake.
“Why don’t you go sleep?” I asked him.
“I’m okay.”
“You’re falling off the chair. You didn’t even get a nap like I did at the ER,” I reminded him.
“I can sleep here,” he insisted.
“Why? Your room is just on the other side of the bathroom.”
I didn’t get it.
“I’m not leaving.”
“Ch—”
“That woman is still here and there’s no dungeon. I’m not leaving.” Chris crossed his arms stubbornly.
I sighed, not wanting to argue, so I slid down in bed and moved to the side.
“Come sleep on the bed, then.”
“It’s—”
“You already slept in my bed once. If you’re not going to leave, then get over here and rest.” He looked around the room as if expecting someone to jump out and tell him it was inappropriate. “Chris, you literally held me in your arms for over twenty-four hours after you rescued me, and then you slept in the same room as me for almost a month. Unless I make you uncomfortable now, come get some sleep.” I patted the side of the bed.
He sighed and got in bed, settling so close to the edge, I was tempted to push him off and laugh. Instead, I passed him one of the pillows and settled down on my side of the bed.
Sleep came pretty quickly, but sometime in the middle of the night, I woke up when I thought I heard someone speaking. I didn’t open my eyes, willing myself to go back to sleep, but then I heard a voice again. I opened one eye, finding myself cuddled against Chris’ chest again. His arms were around me and he sighed before I felt a kiss against my hair.
“I won’t let anyone hurt you, again. I’m sorry I failed you, Little Warrior.”
“You didn’t fail me, Chris,” I whispered.
Chris tensed and I felt him start pulling away, but I held onto his shirt.
“Don’t pull away,” I pleaded, giving his chest a small kiss I wasn’t sure he felt, but it was the only part of him I could reach.
“I-I’m sorry. I thought you were asleep. I shouldn’t have said that.”
“I’m sorry you think you failed me.”
He moved to pull away again, but I still didn’t let go of his shirt. Maybe it was the pain, the exhaustion or almost dying, but I took a deep breath and took the plunge.
“Do you like me, Chris?”
“I—Of course, I do. You’re my—”
“No. You know I’m not asking if you like me as a friend, or as an assignment. Do you like me, Chris?”
I allowed him enough room to move back so he could look down at me as he thought about it. I was nervous, feeling vulnerable as I hung onto the man by the shirt. If he said no, I would feel embarrassed and crushed. Still, there was a small part of me that felt proud. This wasn’t something I ever thought I’d be capable of doing.
“I do, bu—”
“No buts. You like me or not?”
“Yes,” he finally answered, making me let out a breath and smile up at him.
“Then kiss me,” I ordered.
“I-I shouldn’t.”
“Why?”
“I—” he stopped, looking away for a moment.
“I like you, too. Is there a valid reason why you won’t kiss me if we like each other?”
“I shouldn’t take advantage of you.”
“I’m asking you to kiss me. How’s that taking advantage of me?”
“I... don’t know,” he finally answered. “It feels wrong. I’m only a warrior. You’re—”
“My brother Lucien is mated to Cecilia, an omega. My other brother is mated to Evie, a normal pack member.”
“I—”
I pulled up a little so we were face to face, not letting him leave. A small part of me felt like I was cornering him into doing something, but right now, in the dark and knowing how good it felt to sleep next to him, I was feeling bold. If he liked me, and I liked him, I was willing to be the brave one for us both to see where this could go.
“You either have a good reason for not kissing me, you don’t like me, or you’ll kiss me right now, Chris. Which is it?”
“What if it triggers you?”
“Then, we do what we’ve done with everything else. We work on it, and we practice.” I grinned. “I’m willing to practice it a lot.”
“You’re making a joke?” His look of disbelief made me giggle a little, and his mouth twitched upward for a moment before he sighed. “You’ll tell me if something makes you uncomfortable?”
“Haven’t I always?” I asked.
His hand came up to my face, where he tucked a few strands of hair from my face behind my ear. He approached slowly, as if expecting me to freak out. I kept my eye contact with him, letting him know I wanted this, despite feeling my heart beating so fast in my chest. This was as much a push of boundaries for him as it was for me. He needed to get past his own self-doubt. I needed to see if an intimate moment like this would trigger me.
I closed my eyes when Chris’ lips finally touched mine. It was tentative and soft, and it felt good. I thought of nothing except for the man in front of me. Too soon, though, he pulled back and I opened my eyes.
“Still okay?” he asked.
“No,” I answered, making him frown. “You stopped. Why did you stop?”
“I—”
“Chris,” I stopped him, placing my hand on his cheek, and he closed his eyes at the contact. “I will tell you if I feel uncomfortable. Please, kiss me.”
He leaned forward again and kissed me. His arms circled me, one under my waist to pull me closer, the other up to my neck to support it. When his lips began to move, I was lost. His kiss was still tender, loving, his lips just as soft, but there was no more hesitation. I placed a hand on his chest, where I could feel his heart beating as fast as mine. His tongue pushed past my lips, and a small moan left my throat.
Chris pulled back. His eyes were dilated, and he was breathing as hard as I was.
“Thank you,” I whispered.
“Why?” he asked.
“For listening.”
“You’re still okay?” he asked.
I shook my head and gave him a little grin.
“No. That was definitely triggering. We should do it again so I can get used to it.”
His eyes widened and then he graced me with one of his genuine smiles. He leaned over and kissed me again. This kiss was more possessive, more demanding, but still just as soft and tender. He took my lips with more confidence, just like I wanted him to.
I was a panting mess by the time he pulled back again. His lips grazed mine one more time before he sighed, and buried his face in the crook of my neck. A few moments later, Chris pulled back, his eyes were black and a growl rose from his chest. He closed his eyes, and when he opened them again, his eyes had turned back to their usual brown, and I was instantly concerned.
“Did Titan just growl at me?” I asked, making Chris shake his head.
“Titan likes you,” he answered, and his words made me smile.
I guess it was a happy growl?
“Well, I’m glad I have his approval.”
“What about Nenetl?” he asked, worry filling his eyes.
“She spent too much energy healing me. She’s still sleeping, but she likes you, too. Titan’s what snapped her out of her breakdown that day in the office.”
His eyes turned black again and he kissed me. When Chris took control back from his wolf, his cheeks pinked.
“Sorry. He keeps pushing through. He’s... happy.”
I sighed happily, and Chris pulled my head to rest on his chest.
“Sleep, Violet. It’ll help Nenetl get her energy back.”
“You’ll stay?”
“Yes. I’ll stay.”
He kissed my head again and I cuddled in closer, letting his warmth and scent lull me back to sleep.