Chapter 50
CHAPTER 50
ELIJAH
M um is waiting for me when I arrive at The Foyer and Reading Room at Claridge’s. Afternoon tea is one of her favourite pastimes these days.
“I’ve already ordered,” Mum says as I take a seat opposite her.
“Thank you.”
She nods to the waitress, letting them know they’re free to serve.
“I do like it here,” she says, looking around.
I follow her gaze and understand. The original art déco mirrors, striking Chihuly sculpture, and gentle piano music adds to the ambience.
Mum pauses as our waitress arrives with our platter of finger sandwiches, scones, pastries, and tea. We wait while she pours the tea, thanking her as she leaves. I look up to find my mother scowling at me.
“What is it?” I ask, with a sinking dread, I know what’s coming.
“When are you and Penelope going to go public?” she says, lifting her bone china teacup to her mouth and staring at me over the top.
I freeze, making her chuckle.
“You didn’t think I’d find out? That you and Lottie have been spending your days at Pen’s, that she’s been staying at yours.”
“We haven’t been keeping it a secret, per se,” I say defensively, looking around and seeing who might overhear. Everyone around us is absorbed in their own conversations.
She raises an eyebrow, making me smile.
“No? So Kat knows? Gabriel? Caleb?”
I squirm under her scrutiny.
“No, they don’t know,” I tell her. “Bloody hell, I’m beginning to see how my siblings felt.”
“Language,” she says, and it’s my turn to scowl.
“I’m thirty-seven,” I tell her, but find myself shrinking under her scrutiny.
“Oh, no, you don’t. You’ve got away lightly,” she says, smirking. “Besides, Pen is family—she’s not someone you mess with.”
I lean forward and whisper, “You think I don’t know that?”
I sit back and run a hand through my hair, picking up my teacup and taking a swig. The hot liquid burns my throat but gives me clarity. I meet my mother’s gaze.
“I care about her, Mum. But it’s complicated. There’s Lottie, Kris?—”
“Complicated, shmomplicated . Why does it have to be we make things complicated? Where there’s a will, there’s a way.”
“It’s still early days.”
Mum looks at me and laughs, the sound one of pure delight.
“Early days?” She chuckles to herself. “You two have been dancing around each other since the moment you met. Eighteen years. Early days, indeed! You were made for each other. Always were. If other forces hadn’t intervened, things would have been different. You and Pen would have been together.”
My mum’s words hit me in the chest.
“What do you mean?”
My heart sinks. I thought I’d hidden those feelings, locked them away.
As if sensing my unease, she reaches forward and pats my hand. “I’m your mother, Elijah. But anyone with eyes in their head, who knew you two, could see it. Darra knew it. You understood one another on a level that is not usual.” She smiles at me. “I have to admit when you first brought Pen home, she was a little left field . Her makeup, her piercings, but watching you together, the way your friendship developed.”
I laugh at the memory, thinking back to Pen’s white foundation, her array of piercings, and her dyed black hair. Her all-black wardrobe made her look like an extra from the Addams Family.
“But it wasn’t long before I realised she was special,” Mum continues.
I look over. “She was and is special,” I agree.
I sink into the chair.
“All I’m saying is. You and Pen. You need to give each other a chance. That woman has loved you for so long.”
I turn my head sharply to look at my mother.
What the?
“Don’t look at me like that. She has loved you and supported you. When she announced her engagement to Kristophe, I must admit I was surprised, as was Louise. Especially with your divorce going through.”
Ahh, our relationship mole. Louise and Mum have become close friends over the years.
“I’ve never…”
“Oh, Eli. The heart wants what the heart wants. I think you know that better than most.”
“I tried to fight it. It’s why I stayed away from her.”
“I know. I’ve watched you both battle your feelings. Neither one of you letting them surface.”
“I was a bad husband.”
“No. You did what you thought was right, even when it was wrong. You and Darra hurt one another, but that young woman was determined to have you, whatever the cost or at least her father was. I think she realised forcing what isn’t there never works, however much you might will it.” She sighs. “But you’re past that now. Neither one of you is too old to find future happiness.”
We sit in silence for a while, my chest clenching. I’ve made such a mess of my life.
“What if I don’t? I don’t want to damage Lottie any further. She’s been through enough. As for Pen, she doesn’t want to go public because she doesn’t want to hurt Kristophe. But she also doesn’t want it to overshadow our relationship.”
“You both need to trust yourselves. I’ve given both of your brothers the same advice and it’s seen them happy.”
“They aren’t me.”
Mum chuckles again. “If you’re thinking of Lottie, stop. My granddaughter already loves Pen, so it’s not like she’ll need much convincing. Have you told her?”
I look away.
“Tell me I’m mistaken.”
“No, Lottie appears to be thrilled Pen and I are together. So much so they’ve gone dress shopping for your birthday weekend.”
One can only describe the look on her face as smug.
“As I thought. As for you and your brothers. You’re all individuals. Even the twins differ greatly from one another. But as I told them, let the universe put you on the path you need to be on. Listen and watch. As for Lottie, I’ve no fears there, and neither should you. I’ve never seen a girl love someone as much as that young lady loves her godmother, and I know the feeling is mutual.”
Mum looks at me. She must see something in my expression. I’ve never discussed Pen being made Lottie’s godmother.
“It was your father,” she tells me. “He made it clear Pen was to be Lottie’s godmother.”
A sad smile passes over my mother’s lips.
“What?” I say.
This is news to me. Darra had simply said she wanted our uni friends to be our godparents, but I think there’s more to this story. When I go to open my mouth, she holds up her hand.
“Some things are better left in the past.”
A sudden realisation hit.
“Did Dad have something to do with Pen walking away from our business venture?”
Mum raises her eyes to mine, her gaze firm.
“Leave the past in the past, Elijah. It’s better for everyone. I’m sure you’ve uncovered a lot about Pen recently.”
I nod.
“Then all you need to know is he protected you both.”
I want to ask more, my stomach churning. Why the hell had my father been involved with Pen and her hacking? Is that what Mum means?
As if sensing my turmoil, she leans closer.
“Let it go. And Elijah. Her father’s happiness is all Lottie needs. Remember, lead by example, showing her what love looks like. True love will be more powerful than anything else.” She pauses. “And since she’s been back, she’s smiling from ear to ear, which tells me a lot.”
I frown, making her laugh.
“Social media, Elijah. I’m not a fossil.”
I shake my head, wondering if she’ll ever not surprise me.
She’s right, Lottie is much happier, but I wondered if that was a dream.
My mum’s spiritualist outlook is something I’ve ignored. But maybe, just maybe, there’s hope for me—for us.
“I know Pen always comes to the Frazer Foundation weekend. But this year, invite her as your guest.”
“I told you, she doesn’t want us to go public yet,” I admit. The hollow feeling in my stomach returns. “She should be on her honeymoon. She’s trying to be respectful.”
Mum taps her lips. “But that’s not all. That’s not what is worrying you.”
Damn her.
“No.” I sigh. “I wonder if she regrets splitting up with Kristophe. Pen had her future planned out. Now those plans are in the toilet, and she’s reshaping her future.”
“And you can’t be part of that reshaping? Have you talked to her?”
“I still question everything.”
“That makes me happy because it means you care. But Elijah, relationships are not just built on great sex, although it helps. They’re also built on trust and communication. Speak to Pen, tell her your fears. You’ll probably find you have the same ones.”
When I stay silent, she rolls her eyes, and I know she’s thinking life’s too short.
“As for my birthday weekend. Pen was supposed to be on her honeymoon, however, she’s always attended the Frazer Foundation Day, so you can invite her. How you both act in public is up to you. Kat will be back from her business trip so you can fill your sister in. I suspect Gabriel and Caleb have already taken out bets on you two.” Mum grins, a sly smirk forming. “Hopefully, your sister won’t castrate you. She’s very protective of Pen.”
“Ha ha, very funny.”
“She was there for Pen, and Pen for her. Those two are as close as sisters.”
“I’m her brother,” I say, feeling a little put out, but I can’t deny the strength of their bond. “Why are my family siding with my girlfriend?”
I pause, while Mum’s grin widens, and it’s then I realise what I’ve said.
“There’s hope for you yet, Elijah,” she says. “Now, let’s eat these sandwiches and pastries before they go stale. I’m starving.”